Drunk Jiangnan

Bai Luo's hands, immersed in the cold water, froze for a moment. In the misty mirror, she glanced to the side, revealing her beautiful jawline.

My eyes met someone. A light that shouldn't have appeared.

Where did this come from?

Looking at the girl's wandering pupils, Bo Xi suppressed the hoarseness in his throat and spoke. It was not gentle, but an order.

"Isn't it your period?"

"Don't use cold water, it's harmful to your health."

She was startled. Her thoughts were stuck.

What flashed before my eyes were fragments of my part-time job.

The smell of the convenience store night shift, the last subway train, and cold instant noodles.

It is a daily life that cannot be pieced together, and it is an incomplete self.

He knew that it was common sense that girls should not touch cold water.

Under low temperature stimulation, blood vessels will spasm and cause pain.

But her mother said:

"Don't be so delicate like other girls."

She dunked the redness in the cool dishwater. Obeyed. Accepted.

A monthly remittance slip became a priceless ticket to my mother's voice. A two-minute phone call became a luxury.

Every time I say "I miss you", I have to work overtime at night.

It's a transaction, not family.

But she was willing.

Willing to tie myself up. Willing to split my heart in two.

Half of it is soaked in bitter water and fermented into hatred.

I held the temperature for two minutes in my hand, it felt fake, but warm.

She is cold, hurt, and unbreakable.

It's herself, not someone's shadow.

The dejected figure on the sofa, with a lollipop in his mouth, was slouching and looking unsightly.

The floor-to-ceiling windows on the open-air balcony were cracked, and snow foam invaded with the wind, and the coldness rushed in.

The silver-gray-haired boy's bangs were blown away, and the ends of his hair fluttered behind his head.

Bai Luo calmly retracted his gaze and changed the water to warm water.

The sheets were soaked with moisture and hung heavy. She leaned over and struggled to straighten them.

The bloodstains were concentrated in the center of the bed sheet. I rubbed them vigorously with both hands, and the cold water-colored finger bones turned white one by one.

In the bathroom, the damp air was mixed with the chill, and the thin pajamas absorbed the moisture and became heavy.

When she rinsed for the last time, she lowered her head and her hair fell into the water, becoming tangled in foam and causing a tingling sensation on her neck.

Bai Luo twisted the bed sheet into a knot, squeezing out all his strength. The dirty water splashed onto the wall, and the mold spots became darker.

A ray of bright sunlight leaked through the gap in the clouds, slanting down onto the back of her wet hand, its warmth floating on the foam and casting light and shadow.

The layouts of the Millennium Building in Nanfeng Lane and the Tube Building in Yanyu Lane are very different. The balconies are open-air, with oxidized and mottled iron railings that curve and twist.

Sheets and quilt covers were hung one by one on the clothesline. The iron hooks were rusted to the point of being brittle. She had to adjust the angle repeatedly before the tip of the hook could be embedded in the fabric.

The wind rushed in through the hollows in the railings, the damp sheets blew across her cheeks, and the coolness seeped into her pores, but she breathed a sigh of relief.

The edges and corners that bite people in life must be smoothed out with blood and flesh.

"Buzz buzz buzz..."

The cell phone on the sink counter buzzed at an inopportune moment.

Bai Luo closed the floor-to-ceiling windows, and the glass curtain wall blocked out the noise outside.

The living room was quiet and the vibration of the cell phone was amplified infinitely, piercing the eardrum.

She frowned slightly, her eyes fixed on the blue screen.

——Uncle.

After hesitating for a moment, he finally pressed the answer button.

"Where?"

A restrained and low-pitched voice slowly unfolds.

Bai Luo forgot about the person playing games on the sofa. When he raised his eyelids and looked at him, he hurriedly turned down the volume of his phone to the lowest level.

For fear of disturbing him, I retreated to the bedroom with my phone, took something, and walked towards the open-air balcony.

A double rocking chair, likely recently purchased, sat quietly on the balcony. Its smooth wood and brightly colored fabrics stood out against the aging, aging surroundings.

"Where?"

The question came through the receiver again, revealing hidden patience.

"A friend's house."

Bai Luo didn't ignore him after all. He took a thin cigarette from the cigarette case, lowered his eyes and looked at him intently, then lit it with one hand to block the wind.

The scarlet spot flickered, like her uncle's never-ending questioning, which she gently held in her cigarette butt.

The smell of tobacco is tangible. Its texture is rough, caressing the nasal mucosa, like fog, yet heavier than fog, hanging on the end of the breath.

The snow has cleared and the sky is clear. Ice crystals are dripping from the eaves, and melted water is flowing along the cast iron drainpipes, forming thin ice on the bluestone slabs.

The cold water vapor seeps into every pore. The words whispered in my ears are a gentle prison, a judgment that cannot be escaped.

"Why can't you just stay at a friend's house? I sent you the address of my apartment on WeChat. It's safe and comfortable, and close to school, so it's perfect for you to stay.

I have already taken care of everything for you, you just need to pack your luggage and go there."

"Zhao Zhao, I won't let go this time."

“…”

He doesn't even pretend anymore.

The emotions are torn apart, revealing naked obsession.

"I'll think about moving."

She already owed him too much and didn't want to add to the debt.

Being in the same room with Bo Xi feels like a thorn in the throat.

But she was short of money and could not afford to live alone.

"I won't force you, but you have to give me the same place you live now. I'm worried."

"WeChat sent you a message, hung up."

The phone was hung up, and the ashes fell silently on the windowsill, like a crushed old dream.

Send the location and add another sentence.

[Tell me before you come.]

I was afraid that he would show up suddenly, run into people who shouldn’t be there, and continue a night that shouldn’t be continued.

The dead branches at the entrance of the alley trembled in the cold wind. The snow melted away, revealing the mottled brown mud, just like a scar disguised by the world.

The sudden cold attack suddenly brought back memories of the chilly spring days on the eve of the 2012 high school entrance examination.

The wind in Nanhuai was a bit artificially gentle. The classroom air conditioner blew warm air, and outside the window, the magnolia blossomed ostentatiously. A single pink petal accidentally landed on the exercise book, like a nap of youth.

The transcript of the mock exam was a winding upward line, and the teacher's praise at the parent-teacher meeting made my uncle's eyes light up.

But as soon as the bell for the high school entrance examination rang, he was forcibly taken back by the bodyguards sent by his father from Hong Kong Island.

The sound of the Xiangjiang River tide separates the two sides forever.

During the three years of high school, I was in a daze and didn’t know where the beginning and the end were.

She steps on whichever page the wind blows.

Rootless and helpless, lost and at a loss.

I only understood later that the short-lived warmth was on credit. If you don’t pay it back on time, the interest will be a pain that will keep you awake all night.

Night after night, I dream of 2012:

The warmth of the air conditioner, the falling magnolias, and his gentle smile.

——It’s a yesterday that can never be returned to.

But when I woke up, the sound of the tide continued in my ears, the moonlight on my pillow was cold and hard, and the phone was always busy.

No answer, no reply.

In the midsummer of her graduation year, she boarded the train to Hangzhou-Hong Kong alone, clutching her tear-soaked application form.

But fate had to make her and him meet again on an evening when the first snow fell.

Times have changed and she no longer needs him.

She has grown into a well-defined little adult.

Cold, but awake. Painful, but standing tall.

Bo Xi, sitting on the sofa, was distracted and controlling the life and death of the virtual character.

No matter how loud the game sound effects are, they can't cover up the noise that pierces your nerves.

The sound of a girl talking on the phone was so ambiguous and itchy.

She has a boyfriend?

Can't tell the real from the fake.

It could be a caring greeting from a brother, a loving exhortation from a father, or a harmless joke from a friend.

But the tenderness in her voice showed that someone controlled her emotions.

In the world of emotions, the most taboo thing is crossing the line.

He didn't want to be a mistress and bear the stigma.

There should be no diggers in the corners, too much love can easily lead to disaster.

Whose moonlight is she, and what does it have to do with him?

He just wanted to give her a hand.

They are outsiders who are wary of ambiguity and passers-by who restrain themselves by moral boundaries.

The game came to an abrupt end, and Bo Xi raised his eyelids and looked towards the foggy floor-to-ceiling window.

The glass windows were fogged up due to the temperature difference, blurring the vision.

In the dim light, the girl was rocking quietly in the rocking chair, with a pale blood-red spot flickering between her fingers.

He sucked his cheek, stood up and went straight to the open-air balcony.

The snow mist in the air turned into a chaotic white. He quietly approached the rocking chair and rocked it vigorously as if playing a prank.

Bai Luo, who was sitting in the rocking chair, was caught off guard and leaned forward, nearly burning his fingers with the cigarette butt.

He raised his eyes and glanced at the culprit. There was no surprise in his pupils, only a thin layer of indifference.

Move your mind away as quickly as possible.

"When did you learn to smoke?"

Bo Yi leaned over, used the spark from her cigarette to light his own, glanced at her sideways and asked casually.

She has the purest face and smokes the wildest cigarettes.

The girl is quite different.

Sunlight danced on his long eyelashes, trembling, and the shadow on his cheek swayed. Bai Luo blew out a round smoke ring, and the gray mist tried to climb his cheek, but was torn apart by the cold wind.

"A long time ago."

The sound was as light as ash.

I can't remember the moment I decided to numb myself with fireworks, I only remember the bitterness of tobacco, which was very similar to the taste of tears, and it became an addiction that I couldn't quit.

People say that the road to depravity is a thorny one, but she seemed to be wearing tailor-made dancing shoes, and the road became smoother and smoother.

In high school, rumors swirled around her like rotten leaves. They said she was doomed, that she didn't deserve the light.

But has anyone ever seen her staring at the ceiling late at night, asking herself over and over again: Am I really not worthy of being treated well?

The corner was filled with thick shadows. She huddled into a small ball, hugging the yellowed photo frame tightly.

Even if the temperature has cooled down like snow that never warms up.

Later, she saw the truth.

What I chased with all my might was nothing but a shadow in the mirror.

Longing for touch, yet afraid of being broken.

Some injuries are so painful that the senses become numb and the tear glands become silent.

The wind and snow swept in again, swallowing up the only remaining warmth in the world.

The two figures stood stubbornly in the cold.

"And you?"

Asking back out of politeness.

He puffed tobacco lazily between his thin lips, and the cold ending tone hid the past that he was afraid to touch.

"Several years."

In slow motion, his life was falling faster and faster.

He surrendered to corruption, admitted his defeat, and submitted to his own corruption.

After all, what is missing cannot be filled, and I want to go into the eternal night and cold winter alone.

Nanfeng Lane has been around since ancient times, and has only been accompanied by decadent debauchery.

Now, there is the shadow of a girl.

The smell of damp and mold permeated the gaps between the bricks, and the two fell into a gloomy shadow.

Snowflakes were flying all over the sky, and the world became a blur of white.

*

As dusk fell, the last snowflake grew tired, and the entire Nanfeng Lane was shrouded in mist, like a ferry crossing.

The sound-controlled lights in the corridors of the residential buildings light up one after another, like strange breathing.

Bo Yi left at noon, his key hanging quietly in the hallway. He told her not to leave the lights on, and his figure melted into the twilight, disappearing.

Bai Luo hid the key in the pocket of his down jacket, and sat leisurely on the retro velvet sofa in the afternoon, browsing part-time job information on his mobile phone.

A few drops of snow slid down the windowpane.

She was casually flipping through her phone, and suddenly stopped at the campus wall interface that she had added at some point.

Hangzhou University has two distinctive platforms.

The first is the forum, which is mainly used to follow campus celebrities, dig up gossip, and find handsome men and beautiful women.

The other is the campus wall, which is a tree hole where students can complain about their daily study and life.

Various weird complaints:

Who stole the takeaway food? Who pretended to receive the express delivery?

Which dormitory is filled with ghosts howling in the middle of the night, and which roommate is driving people crazy.

There is even some good-natured teasing towards friends.

It is also a gathering place for recruitment information, where you can find a place for both school work-study positions and off-campus part-time opportunities.

When I was reading the second piece of content on the campus wall, coincidentally, the fifth frame of the nine-square grid involved part-time jobs outside the school.

It is a neon-lit, flashy street outside the university town.

Nightclubs, bars, KTVs, everything you need.

In the fleeting moments, there is revelation every night, living a life of drunkenness and dreams.

Hiring night shift waiters, no restrictions on gender or height. Appearance is a key factor, and those who are too beautiful will not be accepted.

Based on his past work experience in similar places, Bai Luo naturally understood the unspoken rules behind it.

Being too pretty can cause trouble, and employers are unwilling to take the risk.

Recruitment time is limited to arriving at the designated bar before midnight.

The salary is a base salary of 7,000 yuan per month plus commission.

Chunchun seduced her even though she had no money.