Miami Beach

Bai Luo was awakened by thirst and got up in a daze.

She was not familiar with the layout of the large flat, and she stumbled and bumped into things.

The kitchen dining table faces a tall floor-to-ceiling window.

The transparent and clean picture frame reflects a slender figure.

A cup of warm water poured down my throat.

Moist.

The man woke up for a moment.

The city was bustling with people and traffic. Her shadow overlapped on the rain-stained windowpane.

The person is reflected in the fog, his outline is clear, and he looks lonely, cruel and arrogant.

Only Bo Yi.

Before she could look back, someone took the glass from her hand.

The thin lip lines overlap.

Bai Luo stared at him as if in a dream or awake, his jawline was wild and his Adam's apple was three-dimensional and clear.

I was in a trance for a second.

"Where are we?"

She only remembered drinking two Long Island Iced Teas, and the time after that was blank and dazzling.

It was as if someone had cut out that part of the film.

"Lu Fei's house."

Bo Yu's eyes are as sharp as a glimpse into a fire. She has a foresight and a memory black hole.

The answer seemed expected. Bai Luo rubbed his temples, where the blood vessels were throbbing and throbbing with pain. The aftereffects of the hangover were rushing through his head.

"Why didn't you take me home?"

There was a tone of blame.

The next second, he was sanctioned.

Someone gripped the back of his neck with great force.

His body staggered forward.

He suddenly leaned over, his chin against her ear, his voice low and hoarse, half swallowed by the night.

"Don't you want others to know about our relationship?"

The tone was half aggrieved and half unhappy.

Damn it, he had long wanted others to know that they not only knew each other, but were also very familiar with each other.

“…”

What is their relationship?

Fake siblings? Friends? Bedmates?

In other words, what kind of relationship will they become?

Lover?

Then break up?

Get back together?

Like most couples, are you capricious and breaking up and getting back together?

Vicious cycle.

Perhaps, friendship that stands shoulder to shoulder is better.

The lights on the river bank in the distance flickered, like countless unresolved stars.

Bai Luo's throat was choked with thousands of words, and the pain penetrated into his bones.

"When they find out, it will give you a bad reputation."

What's more, her troubles will ensue.

Especially Yin Shuanghui's.

"You think I care?"

His eyelids drooped, revealing faint celadon-colored veins.

The burning anger is growing wildly.

The reflections on the glass of high-rise buildings overlap with thousands of secret lives.

Bai Luo is hiding a secret.

She had seen the crimson corners of Bo's eyes and his hidden fragility.

I have seen his secret tenderness and his unknown tiredness.

The rain outside the window is pouring down hard, and it is so deep and lingering that there is no end and no solution.

Their breathing intertwined, pressing closer and closer.

One is cold, the other is pure.

"Bo Qian."

Bai Luo's eyes were cold and dull, with a crimson wrinkle at the corner of his eye.

"I care."

Her care is unknown to others, but it is burning hot.

The echo of my heartbeat, thump ...

The frequency of him and her has long been indistinguishable from you and me.

Bo Xi's hand, which was clasping her slender white neck, loosened its grip as if in restraint.

When she said she cared about him, did she care about him as a whole?

You're starting to care about him, aren't you?

He didn't dare to have any delusions, but he became the delusion itself.

One step, one inch, one lifetime.

Bai Luo never considered himself lucky. His parents divorced during childhood. He faced bullying during adolescence. And he was subjected to online attacks in adulthood.

There are many ups and downs in life.

There are many regrets in the world, but the only lucky thing is that she met him.

Before I met him, the world was a black and white silent film.

After meeting him, everything has color.

"Then shall we sleep together tonight?"

In the dim and ambiguous atmosphere, a hoarse voice came unexpectedly.

The desires are rampant and cannot be concealed.

“…”

How come the tone of speech changes so suddenly?

Bo Xi's black and white eyes were fierce, cold and lustful, reflecting the little Bai Luo.

The curves of her eyes are alluring, and her voice is muffled and moist.

"don't want."

I don’t want to sleep together. We’re not in a rental house.

In seconds, he fled in panic.

Bai Luo is like a rose with thorns in Bo'er, dangerous and charming. The more painful it is, the more addictive it becomes.

In the endless and surging night, the lights are like heartbeats, and the city is breathing, endlessly.

*

During the first week of summer vacation, Bai Luo's work schedule at the food stall was adjusted to 9 am to 5 pm.

I got off work a little late and missed the last bus in the evening.

Life is always full of missed opportunities. We missed the last time we saw our father, missed the false love of our mother, and missed the passionate love of our youth.

The most painful miss is not even having the time to say "goodbye".

The cicadas chirped incessantly in the sweltering summer heat. The distant horizon faded into a hazy gray line, signaling the beginning of rain.

Bai Luo didn't bring an umbrella. His nasal mucosa had been inflamed recently and his immunity had dropped sharply. He was afraid that the cold would invade his body and worsen his condition.

Went straight to the subway station.

During the evening rush hour, in the crowded station, a slender figure was pushed into the crowd.

The subway roars by, who is waiting for you at the end?

Bai Luo squeezed into a corner of the subway entrance. Through the clean glass window, the girl's figure was hazy and beautiful.

This caused the surrounding high school students to stare at him in amazement.

In an instant, the subway entered the long, dark underground tunnel.

The world became a sinking gray.

She had endured so many dark moments in life by gritting her teeth.

Life is rotten, from the inside out.

＿＿

No one to take care of you when you are sick.

The cold wave in the middle of winter in 2016 came unexpectedly.

At two in the morning, the rented house was filled with the smell of burning food. The porridge in the clay pot had spilled onto the stove, the flames spreading to the bottom of the pot, and the smoke was choking.

She curled up into a small ball on the sofa, the red line on the thermometer approaching 40 degrees.

The phone screen lit up and dimmed, and I flipped through the address book countless times. Finally, I wrapped myself in a down jacket and rushed into the rainy night.

When the smell of disinfectant in the emergency room hit her, she realized that she had put on her slippers inside out and her thin cotton socks had already been soaked with rain water.

The registration form was wrinkled in her palm, and the glass of the payment window reflected her pale lips and trembling fingers.

She staggered forward in the heavy rain, the rain mixed with tears blurring her vision, but she didn't even have the right to stop and cry.

Because there is no one behind me and there are thorns ahead.

The isolation and helplessness she felt when she was frustrated was her deepest wound.

Because of his appearance, he was looked down upon by his classmates. His outstanding abilities made him envied.

But she survived with the meager income, eating cold rice balls and reading professional books in between her part-time jobs, and even walked several kilometers to attend industry lectures to save on transportation costs.

Her fingers were rubbed with blisters from the keyboard, and her eyes were bloodshot from staying up late, but she always told herself that as long as she was alive, she would never bow to darkness.

A person who has been repeatedly beaten by fate, but is piecing together his own light bit by bit from the ruins.

Because she believed in herself, she was born like a bright summer flower, never withering and as charming as fire.

＿＿

The thorn-white carriages sped along one after another.

The cold color fell on the girl in sickly white.

In a moment, I wanted to escape from this absurd world.

I can't understand why Chang Liu feels this way.

How could he say that he took her away from Hangzhou Port because he liked her and wanted to keep her safe?

He said that his love for her had become an obsession over the past ten years.

But ten years ago she was not yet 11 years old.

Heartache is like fog and smoke, blurring the boundary between pain and no pain, blurring the outline of time, but making the senses unusually clear.

She only felt gratitude towards Chang Liu.

The corners of the eyes are filled with water color.

The message on the phone flashed by.

[I have something to do tonight, wait for me to come home and cook.]

A line of words that sounded like a report from a boyfriend.

[Let me cook.]

A word that came to mind by chance.

It's impossible for him to be in charge of cooking every meal.

[My great honor.]

“…”

Those four words stung her eyes.

The image of him typing flashed through my mind.

The eyebrows are relaxed, the corners of the eyes are raised, and the thin lips are freely curved.

Little did he know that the young man who was confined in the dark was ostentatiously rejecting his friend's invitation.

"The girls at home are watching closely."

This one sentence left everyone stunned.

Oh shit, what’s going on?

Do you really have a girlfriend?

Is there really someone hiding at home?

The mysterious young man was left with only a slender back.

The intricate passages at the subway station exit and the flickering signboards are like vague hints from fate.

The future is shrouded in fog and there are no answers.

Bai Luo blended into the crowd of people rushing home and bought five or six taro in the streets.

While browsing videos at noon, I happened to see taro toast and taro pie recommended by a food blogger. They were exquisitely made and looked tempting.

I'm eager to try it myself.

I don't know when it turned into Nanfeng Lane, but under the shadow of the residential building, there is often a group of middle-aged women in colorful jackets gathered, talking about the secrets at two or three o'clock in the morning.

There was a young man wearing a baseball cap with the brim pulled down very low, staring furtively at a gray and old window on the fourth floor.

He refused to leave for a long time.

Bai Luo naturally knew that the figure pieced together from the fragmented words was none other than Chang Liu.

Her sixth brother.

The two met last night.

＿＿

The sun sets in the west when the sky is about to get dark.

Chang Liu leaned lazily against the lamppost, his eyes deep and fierce, staring at the most beautiful girl in the world without blinking.

"Have you decided when to leave?"

It was a very casual question, but it made Bai Luo distracted.

The sky was gray, just like her uncertain thoughts.

The sky and the heart are the same color.

He replied ambiguously, "I'm considering it."

Is it really under consideration?

But her heartbeat betrayed her.

I can’t bear to leave Hangzhou and Hong Kong, I can’t bear to leave the old city, I can’t bear to leave the rental house, I can’t bear to leave the years, I can’t bear to leave someone.

Give up?

Easier said than done.

The shadows of the trees were faint under the gray sky, and a man dressed like a gangster laughed with an unclear meaning.

"Maybe it's because I can't bear to leave someone."

"Xiao Zhaozhao."

On the bus on the night of their reunion, he clearly saw her through the foggy window and clumsily wrote down a name.

"Thin"

Asked someone to check it out.

An unexpected gain.

The little boy who was mistakenly arrested by drug dealers ten years ago turned out to be him.

What was unexpected was that 001 and 002 of that year, whether it was a disaster or a fate, the two living flesh and blood, who had escaped the years and dodged the rainstorm, were entangled again.

Bang bang bang!

My heartbeat is out of control and rhythm is disrupted.

It's because of someone.

I don't know when I fell in love with him, it was completely out of the blue.

Perhaps, when you are hesitant to speak, your heart will burst out.

After all, heartbeat is the most direct truth of the body.

But at this moment, in the endless summer at 37° north latitude, on July 11, 2018, at 8:31 PM, she admitted that she liked Bo Xi.

I like it very much. I like it very much.

Bo Yi may never know that her admission is an echo that comes many years late.

But what if I like it?

Time is the catalyst, and their ending was destined to be missed from the beginning.

She won't stop for anyone. Love is just the icing on the cake for her. Career is the foundation and a necessity.

The century-old trees at the street corner were covered in gray spots, stained by rain.

The dead leaves were crushed, making a crackling sound.

Broken dreams, unformed.

"Xiao Zhaozhao."

"Come away with me."

"There must be a home."

These three sentences suddenly entered Bai Luo's ears.

My head feels empty and hollow.

What does he mean?

Like her?

The next second, a confession that seemed serious yet casual confirmed her conjecture.

"I can't tell I've always liked you."

"Ten years of liking has become an obsession."

It’s still the same old saying, there is no warmth that comes out of thin air, no love without reason, and roses will not bloom in the desert.

Behind all good intentions, there are expectations, whether explicit or implicit, but the depth varies.

No wonder the bread was only given to her, no wonder she was helped to escape from hell.

No wonder he's been looking for her.

It turns out that there is a trace of everything.

"Sixth brother, you are my big brother."

The corners of his moist eyes drooped, and he uttered a sentence as if escaping.

The implication is that she only regards him as a brother.

Gray fog filled the street corner, and she became lost in her own shadow.

I'm sorry, Sixth Brother.

Don't like me.

＿＿

The old lady under the shade of the tree was chattering away, and Bai Luo's eyes were inexplicably red.

In the gray-toned perspective, the old city became a faded frame of film.

Water leaked intermittently from the corners of the walls, and every patch of wall was moldy and blackened. Years of dampness had soaked the walls with moss.

The damp pain spreads from the corner of the wall to the bottom of the eyes.

Unexpectedly, a beam of white light fell.

I made a video call to her.

"Ding" sound.

Video answering.

In the long night, within the small frame, a ferocious face suddenly and unexpectedly broke into her crimson-covered pupils.

I couldn't figure out why he called.

Are you not going home?

The rustling of wind.

Bai Luo avoided the sight, and the camera of his mobile phone reflected the mottled light of the sky.

"Show your face."

The other party was dissatisfied with her behavior and spoke in a cold tone.

“…”

He didn't obey. He made up an excuse vaguely.

"what?"

When she found out that he liked to video chat with her, she asked her to show her face every time.

She is not a good girl and doesn't want to listen.

There was silence on the other end, and she continued the conversation in a huff.

"Hang up."

The video interface was silent for a few seconds.

"You did it on purpose, didn't you?"

The young man leaned against the gray-white wall, his black baseball cap pulled down low, half covering his cold and arrogant appearance.

“…”

Finally I listened to him.

The camera shook.

On the screen, Bai Luo's face was extremely depressed, and his eyes were filled with deep fatigue.

"On purpose."

Tell the truth.

At this moment, she was walking up the rusty stairs.

The coal slag and rotten vegetable leaves piled up in the corner were mixed together, and the smell was sticky in the nose and lingered.

The moment he smelled the rot and decay, he wanted to escape.

But she had nowhere to escape.

The serious tone made Bo Xizhen laugh.

"You've become more capable."

It seemed like she always had some ability, and he was happy with her being so close yet so far away.

The gentle tugging that was neither too tight nor too loose was an ambiguous game between them.

The scene suddenly changed.

On the fluorescent screen, there are all kinds of milk tea patterns.

"Are you in a milk tea shop?"

"I'm passing by. Which one do you want to drink? I'll bring it to you."

The boy's clear throat sound fell steadily into his ear along the network cable.

For some reason, Bai Luo's eyes turned red again.

It turns out that people will buy milk tea without even asking for it.

"Green grapes, maybe."

Bai Luo said in a muffled voice in front of the rental house.

The wind blew in from the skylight on the top floor, causing the dim light bulbs in the corridor to swing.

Just like she was crumbling.

I want to cry but I have no tears.

"Okay, I'll bring it back to you."

Under the black baseball cap, a pair of eyes filled with cold mist curved lazily.

Girls like green grapes.

Bai Luo turned on the incandescent light in the kitchen.

I pushed open the window, but what greeted me was not the wind, but the entire moldy sky.

Looking from a distance, the outline of Hanggang Nanshan is pushed away by layers of green waves.

Outside the window was the misty Fifth Avenue.

"Then can you come back soon?"

Suddenly, I wanted to see his whole body.

Living flesh and blood.

The payment button at the milk tea shop shrank the video page.

A "ding" sound, along with the girl's choked sobs, filled the air.

The unbridled eyes turned cold in an instant.

The screen image zoomed in again and the eyes focused.

Under the cold and sharp light, the pair of eyes that usually seemed stubborn and watery were now wet and pink.

"Who the hell bullied you?"

The boy, who was always at ease, panicked for the first time.

His face was covered with dark clouds, his jaw was tense, and there was a hint of viciousness in his eyes.

"Wait for me, go back immediately, don't hang up."

Vines climbed up from the building below, making the girl in front of the iron fence look aqua.

A person who has been defeated all his life will never lose in the heart of a young man who never gives up.

Always come out on top.

The empty streets are overgrown with weeds, wild geese fly across the sky, leaving only a mottled dusk.

"No one is bullying me, I have something to tell you."

Actually, I should have said it earlier. She had selfish motives.

Can't bear to leave.

I always think that there is a lot of time to come, but I forget that life is impermanent.

The young man on the other side of the video was as fast as a black lightning.

The wind whistled in my ears, mixed with a low and soft sound.

Suddenly, his body shook.

"Bai Luo, what do you mean?"

"Leaving again?"

No wonder I was cooking tonight. No wonder I choked up. No wonder my eyes were wet.

It turns out that everything is in order.

But he had no intention of letting her go again.

The narrow corners of his eyes suppressed a surging anger, and the tip of his tongue pressed against the roof of his mouth in dissatisfaction.

He uttered harsh threats.

"Just try and move out tonight if you dare."

“…”

Bai Luo did not expect his reaction.

Are you angry?

We shouldn't have lived together for a long time.

You can't be trapped in the old city, in a rented house, in a rotten and damp environment for the rest of your life.

She sniffed, her throat bitter, but she wanted to tease him.

"I'm leaving."

With a "click".

The video call came to an abrupt end.

The night rain falls heavily.

The young man who was running wildly all the way was caught off guard and in a mess, and was hit by the rain.

Abandoning him again, huh?

The smell of rain was bitter. The stifling heat of summer seeped into my bones, and the air held the foreboding of decay.

A disheveled, misty-faced teenager, milk tea in hand, stumbled into the familiar Nanfeng Alley. A stray cat at the alley entrance fled in fright, and he knocked the trash can askew, sending the stench of decay from the plastic bag wafting across his face.

His breathing was short and his throat was bitter. It seemed as if there were pursuers coming from behind him. He didn't dare to look back, but just stared at the old Millennium Building in front of him.

The light on the fourth-floor windowsill flickered, like a life-saving straw.

The voice-controlled lights in the corridor flickered, and his shadow on the wall became longer and shorter.

The key chain in his trouser pocket jingled, and his hands were shaking so much that he couldn't align the keyhole several times. In the end, he almost pushed the whole bunch of keys into the keyhole.

The door creaked open.

He stumbled into the house.

Empty and silent.

The girl really left.

Are you too stingy to even say goodbye when we meet?

He leaned dejectedly against the gray and decayed wall that was leaking moisture. With a sidelong glance, he saw that the celebrity picture frames on the wall were tilted and there was a fine crack on the glass.

Just like his life at this moment, it was breaking apart silently.

It became a hollow rotten fruit.

Not willing to give up. Not giving up.

I touched my phone and found that the only number with a note in the phone contacts was poked hard.

It’s not that other people don’t take notes, but he can memorize it by just taking a quick glance.

He left a note for Bai Luo because he always felt that he would forget her one day.

In fact, he dreamed one night that she disappeared in the morning mist. When he woke up, her face had become a blurred mark of water.

Forgetting is not a sudden extinction, but a long fading from her vibrant life to silent death in his world.

So, never forget it until death.

Even if the seas run dry and the rocks crumble.

The door was forgotten to be closed, and there were rustling footsteps in the stairwell.

The phone rings on an endless loop.

No one answered.

A sudden, stinging sensation shot through him.

Living is the original sin, and the world turns a deaf ear.

The girl is so uncontrollable, yet so fatally attractive.

A cigarette case sat on the counter in the entrance hall, scorching and blinding.

It was the wildest and strongest cigarette that Bai Luo usually smoked.

Only the last one left.

Damn it, everyone left and still left him a cigarette.

Can it cover the reception fee?

Girls would only torture him.

The silver pulley lighter made a "click" sound.

The open fire spread.

The figure with dark, lifeless eyes looked extremely depressed.

Suddenly, I felt a slender shadow falling at my feet.

He glanced sideways coldly, as if he was disgusted with the world.

His sight focused, and he was dazed for a moment.

In a split second, I laughed at myself.

Tsk.

Didn’t leave.

You little heartless guy, you still come back.