Challenges and Growth

The even breathing of the children napping drifted across the room, like ripples on a lake brushed by a gentle breeze. Xiaofeng, clutching a warm cup of coffee, sat across from Rao Haiyi, listening as he recounted a story that had been buried for thirty years.

"Your mother and I met in 1983," Rao Haiyi's eyes drifted out the window, a little dazed, "At that time, your mother's sister had an asthma attack at home. She was as anxious as a headless fly, rushed out of the door to find someone to help, and ran into my arms." He suddenly crossed his arms, his fingertips seemed to still be catching the warmth of the hug that had long dissipated, and even his voice softened a little.

The scene appeared in Xiaofeng's eyes: on the noisy street, the sunlight was broken on the bluestone slabs, and two young strangers were there, one with a panicked face, the other was in a panic - this opening was much more vivid than she expected, like a frame that suddenly lit up in an old movie.

"Later, I carried her sister to the hospital, but it was too late. To thank me, your mother introduced me to the bus company. I worked as a conductor with her for two years, and later became a driver."

Xiao Feng couldn't help laughing: "It turns out that 'Mumushan Car God' has been online since then."

Rao Haiyi smiled too, the wrinkles at the corners of her eyes gently smoothing out like the surface of water brushed by the wind. "These are all skills I need to make a living." But the smile quickly froze on her face. "It's just that Dad is not very good at what he does. He always likes to cause trouble and fight. It makes your mother worry a lot."

The following story unfolds frame by frame like an old film reel: After Mom quit her job, she spent the day watching over her injured Dad while he applied medicine, and at night, she carried her books to night school. Dad, wrapped in bandages, wandered around the alleyway, waiting for Mom to finish class so he could hand her a hot roasted sweet potato.

Rao Haiyi's face was filled with happiness, helplessness, and a hint of sadness, as she completely immersed herself in memories. "One time, I ran into a kidnapping in an alley, and by some chance, I saved the kidnapped person - it was Zhou Xiao. After sending him home, I became his bodyguard. People at that time didn't understand what 'homosexuality' was. They just thought it was something shameful, and we were the same. Later, Grandpa Zhou arranged for your Uncle Zhou to marry Aunt Fan. To put it bluntly, it was a marriage between a collector's son and a banker's daughter. When Zhou Yang was born, I proposed to your mother."

Xiaofeng's brows furrowed instantly, and anger flashed in her eyes again. Rao Haiyi quickly explained, "You may think I'm an asshole, but I really love your mother."

"Then why drag an innocent woman into a miserable marriage?"

"Xiaofeng, do you think life as a family of three is really miserable?"

"Everyone has desires," Xiaofeng's voice tightened. "Having my longing for love extinguished time and time again is too cruel and too painful."

"It's not what you think." Rao Haiyi's voice deepened, becoming more serious. "I love your mother, emotionally and physically. We are very happy. When I said 'there are some things I can't give her,' I meant a stable life and a complete family."

Xiao Feng shook his head and whispered, "I don't understand."

"Grandpa Zhou arranged your elder uncle Zhou's wedding, and then broke up your younger uncle Zhou and his girlfriend, Yu Manlin. Manlin was his advisor's daughter, also a medical student, and was already pregnant when she graduated—the child would have been the same age as you. Just when they were eagerly anticipating the wedding, Grandpa Zhou found Manlin and said that younger uncle Zhou was gay and was only playing around with her. He even used a photo of us as evidence."

"What happened next?" Xiaofeng's voice trembled.

"Later... Manlin committed suicide, leaving two dead."

Xiaofeng gasped, her hands covering her mouth tightly, and her body subconsciously shrank back, as if to avoid the piercing information. But tears were already flowing uncontrollably, streaming down through her fingers.

"I shouldn't have donated bone marrow to save him. He...should...die..." She cried bitterly, her voice broken and incoherent.

"The one who suffered even more was your Uncle Xiao Zhou," Rao Haiyi's voice suddenly became hoarse as if he had swallowed a handful of broken glass, "He lost his lover and his unborn child, and decades later, he had to save that person with his own hands..." He paused, and finally swallowed the word "enemy", leaving only a heavy sigh.

Xiaofeng's tears fell like beads from a broken string, hitting the edge of the coffee cup, splashing tiny drops of water. "How painful it must be for him... Dad, didn't you say... that this wasn't that kind of relationship?"

"It wasn't. Later, I followed Grandpa Zhou in the collectibles business and made some money, but the policy changed, and our business was basically 'smuggling' and 'fraud'. He sent me here and gave me a new identity to start anew. He never contacted me in all these years, until this time. So when he asked, I agreed to go to Canberra without asking why."

Xiaofeng suddenly changed his expression to one of envy, and whispered, "Dad, maybe you don't like to hear it, but I'd like to call this 'love'. It's so pure. Uncle Zhou treats you well unconditionally, and you trust him unconditionally."

"Why can't it be friendship?"

“Because of exclusivity.”

Rao Haiyi smiled, with a hint of surprise in her eyes: "You know quite a lot."

Xiao Feng swallowed the words that were on the tip of his tongue, smiled bitterly and shook his head: "Knowing a lot doesn't necessarily mean you can live a good life."

These past events were like opening Pandora's box: a business marriage, forced separation, his girlfriend's suicide, two bodies... Xiao Feng didn't sleep all night, sorting out these things bit by bit, and also sorting out his own heart -

Life should be simple, but things never go as planned. Perhaps instead of clinging to the obsession of "simplicity," we should learn to ground our original aspirations through experience. Like a traveler shaking off the sand from their bag, we can transform the past into strength to keep moving forward.

The next day at lunch, she called Zhou Yong: "Uncle Zhou, are you off work?"

Zhou Yong's voice was relaxed: "I'm finishing up. How about you? Have you had lunch?"

"I'll go after I make the call. Uncle Zhou..."

"What's wrong? Are you in trouble?"

"Dad told me about you yesterday."

"There's nothing going on between us." Zhou Yong continued to defend himself.

Xiao Feng burst out laughing: "It's all your fault. The emotions I had been preparing for have all been ruined."

"Okay, okay, let's do it again." Zhou Yong smiled and reorganized his words, his tone full of concern. "What's wrong? Are you having trouble?"

"Uncle Zhou, do you hate Grandpa Zhou?" Xiaofeng's voice was like little nails, gently knocking on Zhou Yong's heart.

There was a moment of silence in the receiver, and then Zhou Yong's calm voice came: "I hated him. I hated his stubbornness, hated him for ruining my feelings, and hated him for causing Manlin's tragedy. But as time went by, watching him lying in bed, weakening little by little, and seeing him feel the loneliness of being unable to control everything, that hatred gradually faded."

"Then why did you save him?"

"I'm his son and a doctor. These two identities forced me to save him. Now that he's gone, all the grudges and hatreds are gone. I think I'm more learning to walk out of the shadow of the past and live a good life." There was relief in his voice, but also helplessness that could not be concealed.

"You're so brave. Uncle Zhou, do you really not like men?"

"I don't like men, but I have a special feeling for your father. The first time I saw him, my heart was beating like crazy, and I had a premonition that I would do a lot for him."

"Yeah, I understand. There's only one orientation in this world, and that's what your heart desires."

"You little girl, you really know a lot." Zhou Yong laughed, and Xiaofeng on the other end of the phone also laughed, with an unprecedented lightness hidden in her laughter.

Xiaofeng thought - if the white paper is stained with ink, then I should learn to paint using blending.