Chapter 333 Yang Hongmei's Change
"Okay, Auntie promises you." Lin Xia agreed. The little boy's self-esteem still needs to be protected.
Seeing that Lin Xia agreed, Xiaojun went home with peace of mind.
After Xiaojun returned home, he no longer thought about the New Year's money. Instead, he was a little worried that Aunt Lin would tell his mother about the incident. However, when he saw that his mother had not been angry or beat anyone for two or three days, Xiaojun felt relieved.
In fact, Lin Xia didn't have time to say it because everyone was busy during the Chinese New Year and Yang Hongmei didn't come to visit. She was busy celebrating the Lantern Festival and the birthdays of the two little ones. She could fool them with a cake before, but now it's harder to fool them as they get older.
After being busy for a while, Lin Xia finally had time to visit Yang Hongmei's home. Since she had promised the child, she did not tell him that Xiaojun wanted to change his mother, but only mentioned the matter of the New Year's money.
"Aren't you afraid that your child will spend money recklessly?" Yang Hongmei was a little surprised when she heard Lin Xia agree to this for the child.
After Han Wei's fetal condition stabilized, she went back to work. He Xiao, on the other hand, did not have to go to work. She was busy making clothes for the child. Following Lin Xia's advice, she used washed cotton cloth, which was soft and skin-friendly as the child's skin was delicate.
"It's just a few dollars, and I don't need it, but leaving it to the children can help train them." Lin Xia thought back to her school days. Children who are strictly controlled by their parents usually have a rebellious period, and the way to rebel is to do the opposite.
She is rebellious in areas where she is strictly controlled. Her university is a prestigious one, so logically speaking, those who can be admitted to this school should be very hardworking in their studies.
But she never expected that her roommate would not be able to graduate. When she was in high school, she was forced to study by her parents. Even if she got 99 points on the exam, she would be asked why she got that one wrong point. She did not understand or care about her roommate at all.
Later, when she went to college, her parents were far away and couldn't take care of her, so she neglected her studies and had a lot of fun during college, as if she wanted to make up for what she had missed before.
Lin Xia believes that communication between parents and children is still very important. "Although children are young, they are gradually growing up and have their own ideas. What we adults need to do is to understand and respect their ideas."
"They are not the continuation of our lives. They should live the way they want to live. So don't confine them with our ideas. We just need to guide them when they go the wrong way."
Children will fly away when they grow up. They have independent personalities and lives.
It was the first time that Yang Hongmei heard such words. She instinctively wanted to refute, but for some reason she thought of her own parents.
"You don't want your children to never tell you anything in the future, do you?" Lin Xia saw her hesitation.
Yang Hongmei immediately thought of the fact that she had nothing to say to her parents. After her parents knew that Wu Deye was a soldier with a good allowance, they often told her to remember her family and help them.
Are the ideas that her parents imposed on her the same as what Lin Xia said?
Thinking of this, Yang Hongmei felt heartbroken. The child she raised with great effort will not be close to her in the future and may not even want to go home.
He Xiao was completely stunned. She thought of herself and realized that she didn't want to go home anymore. She had never been back since she went to the countryside. Now she even just informed her family about her marriage.
She lowered her head and reached out to touch her belly. There was her child inside. When she thought of the scene Lin Xia described, she wondered what was the point of giving birth to the child if the child would not be close to her in the future!
"Communicate more with the children and listen more to their ideas." Lin Xia said with a smile when she saw that the two of them listened.
"How can we communicate this?" Yang Hongmei was a little hesitant. Although she heard what Lin Xia said, she still felt a little awkward.
Since ancient times, children have listened to their parents. Now, if she is asked to listen to other children, no matter how much psychological preparation she does, she still cannot accept it.
"Well... let's start with the New Year's money." Lin Xia thought about it from another perspective, and realized how difficult it is for people to change their usual thinking. "Why don't you ask the child why he wants New Year's money? For many things, it's better to let things flow than to block them."
"If they want it, I'll give it to them." Yang Hongmei frowned. Isn't this just spoiling the child?
"You can make three rules with them. You can give them money, but you can tell them how to spend it." Lin Xia suggested to Yang Hongmei, "You can also use another way, let the children exchange the fruits of their labor for money, such as doing housework and running errands for you."
"I have to pay them for running errands?" Yang Hongmei's eyes widened, somewhat unacceptable. She had never heard of adults asking children to do things for money.
Lin Xia knew that she couldn't accept it, but from An An's childhood to Lele and Ningning now, she found that children actually like to help adults do things.
The sense of accomplishment of being trusted to complete a task independently and being praised after completion can cultivate children's self-confidence and sense of responsibility.
But when Lin Xia talked to them about responsibility and self-confidence, they would not understand. This kind of thing cannot be seen just by her talking.
"The money you spend is just a change from you buying it for them to them buying it themselves, and they will be more reluctant to spend the money they earn through their own labor."
Just like when we were in school, it was easy to spend the living expenses we got from our parents, but when we spend the money we earned through our own sweat and tears, we will remember the hardships we suffered before and will cherish it more.
Yang Hongmei agreed. If the children kept asking for biscuits and snacks, she would be willing to give them to them even if the conditions were bad. After all, she had never saved money before, and it seemed that it was not impossible to give them the money directly.
"Then I'll go back and discuss it with them and give it a try?" Yang Hongmei confirmed with Lin Xia. Those words made her think a lot, but she inexplicably wanted to believe what Lin Xia said.
"Just give it a try. It's not up to you how much to give anyway!" Lin Xia nodded.
That day, after Yang Hongmei returned home, she called her three children.
When Xiaojun saw his mother's serious face and thought about the fact that she had gone to Aunt Lin's house today, his heart suddenly became heavy.
"I have something to tell you...to discuss with you." Yang Hongmei paused, thinking of what Lin Xia said about communicating well.
"What's the matter?" Da Jun felt something was wrong when he saw his mother being so formal.
Seeing this, Xiaojun's calves couldn't help but tremble, and he was wondering where he could run to avoid being caught.
"You can get the New Year's money." Yang Hongmei said slowly.
When they heard this, their eyes widened in disbelief.
"but!"
Hearing this, the two of them suddenly darkened their wide eyes.
As expected, how could his mother be so easy to talk to!
"But what?" Niu Niu asked in a baby voice, tilting her head and looking at her mother.
Dajun and Xiaojun also stared at their mother closely.
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