Chapter 157 A Sweet and Soft Girl
Jiang Zhizhi had noticed Song Man's tense demeanor and guessed that she might like Zhou Xiye.
But now I hear her say it herself, that she has a crush on her man.
I don't know how to comfort her, and I don't know how to console her either.
Before she could speak, Song Man reached out and took her hand: "Zhizhi, don't worry, from the day I found out that Zhou Xiye was marrying you, I put away all my feelings."
"Look, I don't even have the courage to talk to him, how could I possibly have any other thoughts? I sincerely wish you a happy life together."
"What I want to tell you is that my mom found out about my crush on Zhou Xiye after reading my diary. She keeps telling me that I'm shameless, that I'm not studying properly, and that I write all this nonsense."
“She would talk about it at every meal, and when relatives came to visit, she would also say that Song Man was something else. She said that Song Man seemed quiet, but she was very cunning and would secretly write in her diary about her crush on a boy! She never thought about considering my self-esteem!”
"The only thing I'm grateful for is that she didn't say Zhou Xiye's name. I think if she had, I wouldn't have survived."
“After I turned twenty, she started arranging blind dates for me. When I refused, she mocked me for having feelings for Zhou Xiye. Later, she made me write a letter to Zhou Xiye and go to the Zhou family to talk to Aunt Fang Hua about whether I could marry Zhou Xiye. She also asked many people to act as matchmakers.”
“I didn’t want my mom to go, but she stayed home and said, ‘Don’t you like Zhou Xiye? I’m helping you. Look at you, always wearing that deadpan face. I’m doing this for your own good.’”
“Zhizhi, do you know? I felt so suffocated during that time. I was afraid that people would find out that I secretly had a crush on Zhou Xiye, and I was also afraid that my mother would go around asking people to arrange marriages for me. When I walked on the street, I felt like they were talking about me.”
“I can’t sleep all night long. I work overtime every day and I don’t want to go home. I feel like home is a cage that suffocates me and makes me unable to breathe. No wonder my brother moved out.”
"Just now, I really thought that since my life is such a failure, I might as well end it all so that she won't scold me at home every day."
"Don't all parents love their children? Why doesn't she?"
As Song Man spoke, tears streamed down her face once again.
Jiang Zhizhi held her hand. At this moment, she felt that it was no longer a question of whether or not she had a crush on Zhou Xiye, but that Song Man had been suppressed by Chen Limin and had become depressed.
There was no such thing as depression back then.
“Sister Song Man, if you’re really unhappy at home, you can move out.”
Song Man shook her head: "My brother and sister-in-law have moved out because of me. I mentioned it once, and my mother said that if I dared to move out, she would go to my workplace and scold me for being unfilial, and then she would jump off the building."
Jiang Zhizhi was speechless. Was Chen Limin really that extreme?
After a while, Song Man wiped away her tears and looked at Jiang Zhizhi: "Thank you for today. If you hadn't stopped me, I really would have done something stupid. Now that I think about it, it doesn't seem worth it."
Jiang Zhizhi nodded: "Yes, in this world, no one can love you as much as you love yourself. Everyone's happiness is different. You are quiet and don't like to talk, but you are emotionally sensitive. Maybe your happiness is in your writing. Then go find the life you like and live the life you want."
Song Man was surprised that Jiang Zhizhi, at such a young age, could discern her preferences and say something like, "Aren't you angry that I had a crush on Zhou Xiye?"
Jiang Zhizhi smiled and said, "Why would I be angry? Do you even have the courage to confess your feelings to Zhou Xiye?"
Song Man was shocked: "No, that can't be. I haven't seen Zhou Xiye since he joined the army at the age of seventeen. Later, my mother made me feel suffocated every day, so how could I have any thoughts about him?"
Jiang Zhizhi patted the back of her hand: "Sister Song Man, you need to adjust your mood. Go out for a walk more often when you have nothing to do. You can't change Aunt Song, so you can only change yourself. Choose a way to distract yourself and make yourself happy slowly."
She didn't know how to persuade her, so she could only comfort her temporarily and tell her not to have suicidal thoughts.
Before they knew it, it got dark. They stood at the entrance of the air-raid shelter, still unaware of the biting wind.
Jiang Zhizhi noticed it was getting late: "Sister Song Man, are you feeling better? It's getting late, shall we head back?"
Song Man wiped her slightly swollen and sore eyes, feeling a little embarrassed: "I'm sorry to have kept you so long. I don't know why, but I just wanted to talk to you."
Jiang Zhizhi opened her arms and hugged Song Man: "Sister Song Man, girls should live a sweet and happy life. I've been in Beijing for the past few years, so you can come to me if you're ever bored."
Song Man smiled: "I heard from my mom that you're going to university, which is a good thing."
After Jiang Zhizhi let go, he took out a fountain pen from his pocket and put it in Jiang Zhizhi's palm: "Zhizhi, congratulations on going to university. I didn't prepare a gift. This fountain pen was given to me by my unit last year when I was selected as an advanced worker. I haven't used it much."
Jiang Zhizhi felt embarrassed to refuse: "Okay, Sister Song Man, let's go out for dinner together sometime."
After talking with Jiang Zhizhi, Song Man felt a weight lifted from her heart, and she felt less choked up.
It was dark, and there were no streetlights here. The road was full of potholes when we came here.
They couldn't see the road clearly, and the wind seemed to be blowing harder, making Jiang Zhizhi feel like she was about to fly away. She reached out and pulled Song Man back.
As they approached the main gate, someone walked towards them with a flashlight. The flashlight beam shone on them, followed by Zhou Xiye's voice: "Zhizhi..."
Jiang Zhizhi waved to him: "I'm here, I'm with Sister Song Man."
Zhou Xiye breathed a sigh of relief. As soon as he entered the door, he heard Fang Hua say that Jiang Zhizhi had gone to the front gate to meet him and had been there for more than an hour.
I grabbed a flashlight and rushed out to look for it.
Song Man felt a little embarrassed to face Zhou Xiye, so she let go of Jiang Zhizhi's hand and said, "Go find Brother Zhou. It's closer to my home from here."
After saying that, she didn't give Jiang Zhizhi a chance to speak and hurriedly ran away.
Jiang Zhizhi didn't force her. If it were her, she would also feel awkward seeing Zhou Xiye right now.
She jogged towards Zhou Xiye, bumping right into his arms, and chuckled, "I came to pick you up, but I didn't expect to be a little late."
Zhou Xiye helped her stand up straight by supporting her shoulders: "Are you and Song Man that close?"
Jiang Zhizhi naturally wouldn't mention Song Man's matter, and puffed out her little body: "That's right, I'm so cute, everyone would like me."
Zhou Xiye chuckled and reached out to ruffle her hair: "You're really mischievous. Let's go home and have dinner."
Jiang Zhizhi grabbed his hand and stuffed it into his coat pocket: "It's cold, warm my hands, no one will see us in the dark."
This time, Zhou Xiye didn't refuse; he wrapped his large hand around her small one.
As they approached their house, Jiang Zhizhi suddenly remembered something and pulled Zhou Xiye to a stop: "Zhou Xiaochuan said he found a job but won't tell Dad. Do you want to go check it out? He said it's at customs, but that's the place where you're most likely to get scammed."
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