Chapter 70 P-Mist
Chu Beiling seemed to be deep in thought, his gaze fixed on the group of people watching the pounding of glutinous rice cakes: "It is indeed very different."
Xing Yu suppressed the agitation in his heart and stared straight at him: "What's different?"
"What's different..."
Xing Yu gazed quietly at his gentle profile, her breathing slowing down.
A moment later, Chu Beiling turned her head and met Xing Yu's gaze: "They are good friends." He nodded: "Yes, good friends. But there are different kinds of friends."
Everyone has many friends, but there will definitely be one who is very special and different from all the others. You can play with any of these friends, but other friends cannot interfere with your interactions.
Those 'special friends' who prefer to be alone with you and only have each other.
Just like he did with Xing Yu.
Otherwise, what other possibilities are there? No, there aren't any. Girls and girls, boys and boys, they can't possibly be dating.
Is this normal? — Absolutely not, and it's not reasonable either!
Chu Beiling's thoughts paused for a moment.
She quickly recalled how Sheng Xia and Li Dong's eyes sparkled when they looked at each other, as if filled with pink bubbles, and how Su Beichen and Shen Zhi also...
Startled by his own thoughts, Chu Beiling stopped himself in time, preventing his mind from wandering further.
Chu Beiling emphasized his point, but also sounded somewhat questioning: "Actually, it's normal for good friends to have a good relationship, isn't it?!" He paused, then continued, "Just like the two of us."
Xing Yu remained noncommittal, chuckling softly. His heart felt like an unripe orange, sliced open by his cruelty and naivety, its sour and astringent juice splattering everywhere.
Chu Beiling could clearly perceive this relationship that went beyond friendship, yet she never delved deeper into it. Perhaps she had already realized that this relationship had long since crossed the line of friendship, but she could convince herself that they were simply 'special friends.'
Aside from having a good relationship, there are no other essential differences.
Before things became clear, I didn't dare to speak up, fearing things would fall apart between us. I thought that as long as we maintained the facade, it would be fine.
Knowing that Chu Beiling might have already thought of it, but was convincing himself not to think about it further—
Xing Yu didn't know whether this was good news or bad news for him.
Because he had no idea how he would react if Chu Beiling fully discovered this relationship that went beyond friendship—would he accept it calmly, hide away in fear, or be disgusted by him, even if their current good relationship were to vanish into thin air.
Judging from his current reaction, it's probably more likely to be the latter.
But Chu Beiling is braver than him; what if there's another possibility?
He was torn between anticipation and negativity, a state that was too agonizing. Sometimes Xing Yu wanted to just give up and say whatever came of it, but as soon as he thought about how scared Chu Beiling would be, he couldn't bring himself to do it and directly break the current calm.
After having more, Xing Yu couldn't imagine or bear it. He went back to the past, even in the same space, and saw Chu Beiling's indifferent and dissatisfied gaze.
Unable to bear the loss or gamble on it, one can only be a coward, living day by day, waiting with a mixture of anticipation and despair for the day Chu Beiling discovers it.
"What kind of reaction is that..." Chu Beiling narrowed his eyes and said unhappily, "Don't you think so too!?"
If Xing Yu didn't think he was special, and that he was just like any other friend, then if Xing Yu answered like that, Young Master Chu would explode on the spot.
Xing Yu was at a loss for what to do with him, and after a moment he spoke, "You're right."
Chu Beiling's mood instantly improved: "Am I not your most special friend?"
His throat was dry and parched, so Xing Yu swallowed hard and replied, "Of course."
Having received a definite answer, Young Master Chu nodded in satisfaction, "That's more like it."
When their things were finished, the boss called him. Chu Beiling went over to get them, took the items, and handed them to Xing Yu: "Do you want them?"
Xing Yu shook his head: "I won't eat."
Chu Beiling nodded and began to eat by herself.
He held a paper tube in one hand and a bamboo skewer in the other, eating as he walked. Xing Yu kept an eye on the people around him to avoid them accidentally bumping into them.
The two boys walked side by side, slowly chasing after the people ahead.
Chu Beiling took a bite of mutton, and without thinking, he offered the piece of fatty meat in the center of the mutton skewer to Xing Yu, meaning that he should take it and he wouldn't eat it.
Xing Yu stiffened, glanced down at the lamb skewers, then looked at him again, and said helplessly, "Eat it yourself, or just throw it away if you don't want it."
Thinking of Xing Yu's hesitant reaction just now, and seeing his current resistance, Chu Beiling felt a surge of anger and disappointment. "So you were just brushing me off, weren't you?"
Xing Yu: "No."
Chu Beiling: "You do."
Xing Yu pressed the tip of his tongue against his palate and said in a deep voice, "Chu Beiling, think about it yourself, is this appropriate?"
Chu Beiling pouted and said softly, "What's wrong with it? It's been like this before."
Xing Yu took a breath, his voice softening considerably: "The past is the past, the present is the present."
"Our relationship is clearly better now, Brother Yu. Others may dislike me, but you can't." Seeing that he didn't speak, the young master looked at him with a pitiful and incredulous expression: "You really dislike me!"
He was both self-righteous and aggrieved, and Xing Yu simply couldn't bring himself to refuse.
He took a deep breath, closed his eyes and then opened them again. He couldn't afford to gamble, nor could he bring himself to do it. If he continued like this, he would go crazy sooner or later.
—Fine, let him go crazy! It's better than the possibility of losing Chu Beiling.
Xing Yu resignedly bit off the greasy piece of fat from the bamboo skewer. Chu Beiling watched him take it and then put the last piece of mutton into his mouth. After finishing the skewer, he put the bamboo skewer into the plastic bag.
Young Master Chu was suddenly frozen.
Xing Yu stopped and looked at Chu Beiling. The shadow of the eaves fell on his face, making his eyes look particularly dim and flustered.
Xing Yu's heart was pounding, and he couldn't help but ask tentatively, "What's wrong?"
Chu Beiling gave an awkward and uncomfortable laugh: "No, it's nothing."
How could he suddenly think that sharing a skewer of lamb was like an indirect kiss, especially when Xing Yu was resisting and unwilling, and he was being forced to do it because he was unhappy?
What's the difference between this and forcibly kissing him?
Chu Beiling stopped her own irrational and abnormal thoughts once again.
He's gone mad, what the hell is he thinking?
He and Xing Yu used to be like that too.
Most of the boys and girls in the class who were close never shied away from each other. They would share a bottle of mineral water, and when they were starving, they would share any food that the other person had already taken a bite of.
Moreover, he and Xing Yu had a particularly good relationship.
This is perfectly normal.
Chu Beiling stared intently at Xing Yu, remained silent for a few seconds, and then cautiously asked, "We're such good friends, it's okay for us to do whatever we want, right?!"
"Hmm." Xing Yu sighed deeply. Since he thought this way and insisted on it, then so be it.
Chu Beiling stared blankly for a while, then lowered his head and continued eating his skewers. He didn't feed the ones he didn't want to Xing Yu, though he didn't know why he did it on purpose.
He may have sensed danger, but he was unwilling to think about it further.
They met up with the other three people. Xu Tunan handed him the mugwort mochi he had just bought, and took the paper tube from his hand. Xu Tunan then picked up the rice cake that the other person had half-eaten and put it in his mouth.
Chu Beiling tried to stop him, but it was too late: "I've already eaten."
Xu Tunan swallowed the rice cake and said nonchalantly, "I don't mind you."
Chu Beiling glanced at Xing Yu beside her and smiled at Xu Tunan: "Okay, you eat."
"Right, there's absolutely nothing wrong with friends acting like this, so what's so strange about him and Xing Yu just now?" Chu Beiling thought to herself.
Li Dong glanced at the two of them. One was soaking in a vat of jealousy, hesitant to speak, while the other was still clueless or pretending to be stupid. Having grown up with them since childhood, she knew all too well what kind of people they were.
While Xu Tunan was changing the bamboo skewers, she kicked him: "Hu Tutu, you're so hungry you'll die."
Xu Tunan was very unhappy to be kicked for no reason, interrupting his eating: "Li Tangtang, what's wrong with you? There's no food for you."
Li Dong said, "It's different."
Xu Tunan was puzzled: "How is it different?"
Li Dong, too lazy to explain, looked at Xing Yu and asked, "Are you going to continue like this?" He then asked Chu Beiling, "Chu Fanfan, think carefully, have you been acting normally lately?"
Xing Yu remained silent, pursing his lips.
Chu Beiling glanced at Xing Yu and then quickly looked away. If things continue like this, isn't this normal? Why is Li Dong angry and has to remind Xing Yu?
This is completely unreasonable.
And he has indeed been too normal lately.
As for the reason for the abnormality—Chu Beiling couldn't help but glance at Xing Yu again.
Chu Beiling's gaze swept back and forth between Xing Yu and Li Dong, as if he wanted to say something but then stopped.
Xu Tunan was easygoing, but not oblivious. He immediately sensed that something was off: "What are you two talking about? You all get along so well, can't you just say it directly?"
Sheng Xia was about to explain the reason to Xu Tunan when Xing Yu interrupted her before she could speak: "We can leave now. If we stay any later, we won't be able to stay there for long."
Li Dong was furious. She waved her hand and said, "I'm meddling in other people's business. Do as you please." With that, she pulled Sheng Xia toward the bus stop.
The three boys behind them followed, keeping a leisurely pace behind the two girls.
Xu Tunan, standing to the side, raised his chin and asked, "What's wrong with you two? Did you two have another fight?"
“The two of us,” Chu Beiling glanced at Xing Yu again, and after a brief eye contact, he quickly looked away, “what problems could we possibly have, and we certainly didn’t argue.”
Xu Tunan: "Then why is Li Dong acting so crazy?"
After a few seconds of pause, Chu Beiling said, "Who among us hasn't been going crazy every day lately?"
That's true. Everyone's under a lot of pressure lately, and everyone's in a great mental state. It's not uncommon for someone to suddenly go crazy for no reason.
Xu Tunan didn't say anything more, only roared, "Time is passing so slowly, we still have sixteen more days before we're liberated."
Having probably heard that they could go to Wuzhen, there were quite a few people waiting for the bus at the station, almost filling it up. Xing Yu didn't like crowded places, so Chu Beiling stood with him on the edge.
Their phones were confiscated, so they couldn't do anything. Xing Yu didn't seem to care about chatting with him. He took out his sketchbook from his bag, placed it on his arm, and began drawing figures with his eyes downcast.
Chu Beiling couldn't draw since she didn't bring her sketchbook, and with nothing else to do, she could only stare at him.
Xing Yu is really good-looking, with three-dimensional and deep features, just like someone sculpted by a model. No, a model can't capture his noble air.
It's a pity Xing Yu is a boy. If he were a girl, Chu Beiling thought he would definitely be unable to resist pursuing him.
If he were a girl, all his actions would be perfectly reasonable.
Unfortunately, that's not the case, so it's wrong to let your mind wander and think wildly like that.
Li Dong was right. He had indeed been acting a bit strange lately. Chu Beiling raised his hand and pinched the bridge of his nose. With all of them painting intensively lately, they were all going crazy. It was normal for them to have some strange and abstract reactions.
Once the training camp is over, they'll return to normal life, and things might get better.
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