Song Shengsheng has always known that she is sensitive and fragile. Every time she pretends to be carefree, it is because of her inherent competitiveness. She doesn't want to be looked down upon or laughed at.
She said so much.
Fu Cheng replied with just three words: I understand.
This was nothing, and it sounded normal, but she felt as if her heart was pierced.
She hesitated to speak, and wanted to pour out a basket of words, but the flame of her passion had been almost extinguished by his cold water.
Song Shengsheng slowly loosened her fingers that were clenched around his sleeves. She wiped the tears from her face and said, "I know I went too far. I'm sorry."
Song Shengsheng felt that she had said so many sorry things to Fu Cheng that she couldn't even count them all.
It seemed like either she was apologizing or he was apologizing.
It seems like there's always someone who's doing it wrong.
Song Shengsheng didn't know what to do in the current situation. She had never seen Fu Cheng so angry before.
Will you divorce her?
Or he said that he would not love her as much in the future.
Song Shengsheng suddenly felt that Fu Cheng was a bit cruel. No matter how reasonable he was, anyone would not be happy if they were used like a tool and kept secret for so many years.
She understands everything.
But Song Shengsheng still felt that Fu Cheng was cruel to treat her so coldly.
She couldn't stand this kind of gap.
Song Shengsheng felt that Fu Cheng had already conditioned her over the years.
She could no longer bear this huge gap.
But she didn't want to be a little dog wagging its tail and begging for mercy. She didn't even think that she did anything wrong in the beginning.
What other options did she have at that time?
no.
Apart from living a good life with Fu Cheng, loving him well, and preserving her marriage with him, she had no other choice.
Does she have to choose the path in the dream in order to be right? In order not to hurt others?
What about her own life or death?
She admitted that, in the final analysis, she was selfish.
Song Shengsheng raised her little face, looked at him eagerly, and asked in a low voice: "Are you unwilling to forgive me?"
Fu Cheng needs some time to calm down.
He didn't want to say something that would hurt her when he was irrational. He looked at her and finally couldn't swallow the words that came to his lips. He said, "Shengsheng, I thought you really liked me at that time."
"It turns out that I was just being sentimental."
Song Shengsheng had no way to argue, she slowly lowered her head, "Okay, I'm sorry."
She seemed a little reluctant to talk.
She felt that she had already given in, and her apology was sincere and not perfunctory.
But Fu Cheng still seemed unwilling to forgive her.
Then she had no other choice.
Song Shengsheng thought a little uncomfortably, if they really wanted to divorce, would Fu Cheng be willing to give her some of the property?
Fortunately, she has been diligently saving money just in case of emergency.
As for the house, she was not that greedy.
But houses in the capital are very expensive, and she would feel a little sad if she couldn't get one.
But she can use her own pocket money to buy a house, and after ten or twenty years, when the house price increases, she will have more money.
Just for a short while.
She has thought far ahead.
In fact, Song Shengsheng had imagined countless times the scene where Fu Cheng wanted to divorce her, so she was not unprepared.
Song Shengsheng is the kind of person who takes a detour or just turns around and leaves when faced with difficulties.
Fu Cheng said that he needed some time to calm down, but he did not move out of the house. He still came back at the usual time every day. Except that he talked less than before, everything else was almost the same, with no changes.
Remember what she likes to eat.
When I come back, I always bring two of them with me.
I also remembered to remind her that the weather was getting cold and that she should put on more clothes in time. I took care of every detail and didn't look as broken and sad as I did that day.
Song Shengsheng was uneasy for a while. After careful observation, she found that the situation was not as serious as she had imagined. At least Fu Cheng had not filed for divorce.
She couldn't quite believe that this matter could be resolved peacefully. Could it be so easy?
She was uneasy, but didn't dare to ask.
I was afraid to ask because then I would think of unpleasant things, and then I would argue and quarrel.
But not saying anything doesn't mean nothing happened.
As long as Shen Zai is in this world, she has to take care of him and cannot ignore him.
therefore.
Another half month passed.
Song Shengsheng found a good weather day and went to the military area on her own initiative. The guard at the gate recognized her and saluted her.
Every time Song Shengsheng came to the military region, he felt a little uneasy.
She was like this when Fu Cheng was just a regiment commander in Ningcheng. Now that Fu Cheng is the head of the military region, she is still a little timid and cautious.
She didn't know what she was doing.
She should have straightened her back and walked in with confidence, but she got stage fright.
Once this habit is formed, it is difficult to change.
Song Shengsheng rarely went to the military area, and Fu Cheng's subordinates were also surprised to see her.
I don’t know what wind blew the chief’s wife over here.
Song Shengsheng waited in the military district chief's office for a while. It wasn't long before a man in a neat military uniform opened the door.
The moment Song Shengsheng saw him, he stood up.
Fu Cheng unbuttoned his windbreaker and put his jacket on the back of the chair. He looked at her and asked, "What happened?"
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She usually never comes to visit someone unless she has something important to do.
There are very few times when I just come to see him.
Song Sheng whispered, "I want to discuss Shen Zai's matter with you."
Afraid that he didn't know Shen Zai's name, she added an extra sentence: "Shen Zai is..."
“It’s the kid in the photo.”
"Yeah." Fu Cheng wanted to smoke again. This state was not right. He knew it, but it was difficult to control.
When people are anxious, they always have to find something to control themselves, otherwise they can only let their emotions get worse.
Until it gets out of control and becomes irreversible.
Fu Cheng rubbed his fingertips, looking calm on the surface. He asked, "What's the matter?"
Seeing his reaction, Song Shengsheng felt relieved. At least he was no longer annoyed by Shen Zai.
It seems that he still has some tolerance.
Song Shengsheng said: "He seems to be 16 or 17 years old now. He has been staying in a rented house all the time. He has nothing to do all day and this won't last long."
“I want him to read more.”
Having a diploma will make it easier to do anything in the future when you enter society.
Fu Cheng had been looking at her. She frowned and spoke these words in a serious manner, as if she had already thought about the child a long time ago.
Think of a way out for him.
There is a smooth road ahead, and at least I will be a college student in the future. It will not be a problem to support myself after graduation.
This was Song Shengsheng's worst-case scenario.
Because she felt that Shen Zai did not look normal. If she allowed him to grow up freely without receiving any education or the company of his family, he would probably become as bad as in her dream.
At present, Song Shengsheng has not realized how bad Shen Zai is. On the contrary, she feels that the child listens to her very much and does whatever she tells him to do.
Very obedient and unlikely to contradict her.
However, Song Shengsheng doesn't want him to just accept things as they come. Instead of being a puppet of his parents, he should live his own life.
Live the life you like, without having to consider other people's opinions or accommodate others.
After she said these words, she looked at Fu Cheng's expression. In fact, even if Fu Cheng disagreed, she would find a way to let Shen Zai go to school.
She came to discuss with Fu Cheng because she felt that they were still husband and wife, and if there was anything, she should tell him first, instead of subconsciously choosing to hide it from him.
Since Fu Cheng minds her concealment and her deception.
Then she will try not to do it again.
"Yeah, it's good."
"Is it really that good? Don't be unhappy."
"no."
"So do you hate him?"
Hated her child.
Fu Cheng frowned when he heard that. Of course he couldn't like it, but he didn't hate it that much either.
A child who is not yet an adult poses no threat to him.
Even though he is an adult, he is no match for him.
"No problem."
Fu Cheng touched her head and said, "It's only natural for you to care about him."
He doesn't get angry.
A little uncomfortable at best.
This is not unpleasant and cannot be ignored.
Fu Cheng had no way to hold her accountable. After all, she was innocent.
She had such a terrible nightmare for no reason, and so many messy things came into her head. It was a relief that she was not scared.
Fu Cheng thought that he should still be tactful and forgiving to her.
He couldn't be too harsh on her; she was timid and easily broken; if he closed the door on her, she might just turn around and run away.
Fu Cheng didn't want to treat her coldly, didn't want to give her any so-called lessons, and didn't want to get angry.
He just wanted to be good to her.
Thinking about it this way, he actually can't do anything.
He had to stay with her.
Otherwise she would have run away.
"Have you asked him?"
Song Shengsheng shook her head truthfully, "Not yet."
Fu Cheng thought for a while, then said seriously, "Wait a minute, I'll go with you to see him and tell him what you just said."
“Ask him what school he wants to go to.”
"What book should I read?"
Song Shengsheng was very surprised. He didn't expect things to go so smoothly, unexpectedly smoothly.
She was a little caught off guard and had no chance to use all the drafts she had prepared.
Fu Cheng saw her silly expression, lowered his head and kissed her mouth, and after tasting the taste, he was satisfied: "What's wrong? Don't you understand?"
Song Shengsheng shook her head. Her lips felt a little numb after being kissed. She said, "No, it's good like this."
Song Shengsheng said from the bottom of her heart: "I am very happy."
She raised her face and kissed Fu Cheng proactively. This was the first kiss she had initiated since that day.
She said, "I don't want you to be too pushy, and I don't want him to be alone."
She couldn't do such a thing as completely abandoning another person just for Fu Cheng's feelings.
She teetered on both ends of the scale.
She was staggering to the point of feeling dizzy. If no one was willing to pull her up, she would have fallen and gotten bruised and battered.
After talking it out, Song Shengsheng finally didn't have to be tense in front of him. She threw herself into his arms as usual, wrapped her arms tightly around his waist, buried her face deeply, and eagerly absorbed his breath.
She finally stopped trying to be tough and told him in a muffled voice, "I haven't slept well these past few days."
"At night, I also fall asleep intermittently and often have nightmares. I can't sleep well."
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"I want you to comfort me, but I'm afraid you're still angry. I don't even dare to get close to you when I sleep."
"Although I get angry often, I'm not as scary as you when I'm angry. But you... every time you get angry, I don't dare to talk to you. I think we're getting divorced."
"Fu Cheng, no matter what happens in the future, can you please not be angry with me?"
"Even if I provoke you, please don't be angry, okay?"
She took the opportunity to make further demands.
Fu Cheng listened silently and hummed, which was considered a promise, "I will never be angry with you again, Shengsheng."
She felt bad, and so did he.
If you torture her, you are also torturing yourself.
"But you have to tell me everything, okay? Don't hide it from me anymore."
Song Shengsheng is used to using lies to protect herself, and it is difficult for her to change her habits, but when facing Fu Cheng, she is always willing to change a little more.
So.
She, a habitual liar, looked into Fu Cheng's eyes and said with great seriousness, "I...I am willing to tell you anything that happens in the future."
Although Fu Cheng didn't quite believe it in his heart, he still believed her. He said, "Shengsheng, I am your husband. We have been married for so many years. You can trust me."
Believe that he will not hurt her no matter what.
She didn't have to be on guard against him the same way she was on guard against others.
Fu Cheng understood her from the beginning to the end, and knew how to feel sorry for her.
He could understand her cautiousness, her sensitivity and fragility, her coquettishness and arrogance.
He had seen through it a long time ago.
He likes her for who she is, regardless of her good or bad character.
She doesn't need to hide, she can just be herself.
She didn't need to wrap herself up in thorns with so many lies and so many pretentious words.
Fu Cheng wanted to be the one who was completely accepted by her, and he could share the good and bad, the sad and happy with her.
"You always say nice things and say you're willing to tell me everything, but in fact you still have reservations about me."
"I know you're afraid of getting hurt, but—"
After a pause, he continued, "What have I done over the years to hurt you?"
Fu Cheng held her tightly in his arms, with the strength that seemed to crush her into bones. He hoped that the two of them could merge together, bones and blood.
This can also be considered as a fusion of each other.
He was greedy. He wanted her as well as her sincere, ardent trust and deep love that came from her heart and was only for him.
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