determination
The more she tried to escape and struggle, the more relentless he became, determined to see her blush and tremble before he was satisfied. Lin Xu gently pushed him away, but to no avail; her voice was as shy as a pool of ice about to melt, "Your child..."
Dou Yanxun then breathed heavily and looked down at Lin Xu's stomach, which he had almost crushed.
There is a little life about to come into this world. A child that belongs to him and her.
He lowered his head and slowly approached her delicate, snow-white skin, then placed a passionate and deep kiss on her lower abdomen.
"Our children."
He raised his eyebrows to look at her, his eyes sparkling. "We haven't named him yet. What should we call this little one?"
Their palms touched, their fingers intertwined, and he spoke in a very low voice, his voice landing on her lower abdomen, "They say a humble name is easier to raise, so how about calling me A-Gui?"
Lin Xu's lips twitched; his worries were suddenly replaced by amusement. He feigned anger and said, "What an awful nickname! If it were a little girl, she'd probably cry from the moment she was born..."
Dou Yanxun rolled over to a more comfortable position, pulled her into his arms, and used his other hand to cover her with the quilt, making sure she was completely covered.
"The girl should also train with me from a young age, mastering all kinds of swords, spears, and halberds. That way, if we encounter bad guys in the future, our daughter can take down the villains by herself. Only in this way can I feel at ease."
She smiled helplessly. Dou Yanxun had been frail and sickly since childhood, and later endured years of loneliness and neglect in the northern frontier, having already experienced the full spectrum of human nature's harshness. Ever since she became pregnant, he had been worried about how the child would protect himself if bullied. For a time, he even had a sudden urge to have Qi Guan sharpen several wooden knives and spears that the child could use.
Lin Xu closed his eyes, feeling only the flickering candlelight and the fragrant aroma filling the hall—a rare moment of tranquility. The two had endured many hardships in Laining, a place of high mountains and long roads, but it was also a rare opportunity for them to escape the chaos of the world and enjoy peaceful, serene days.
Looking back now, it feels like a lifetime ago.
If she hadn't approached the Dou family with the intention of revenge in the first place, would she and Dou Yanxun have met again? Would they have had such peaceful times again?
She was momentarily stunned, but then realized that he had opened his eyes and was looking at her, resting his chin on his hand.
"...What, does the name A-Gui really anger Madam so much?"
Those captivating peach blossom eyes, with just a hint of tenderness, could utterly enchant. Especially when those deep eyes reflected only her image.
Seeing that she was just looking at him silently, Dou Yanxun smiled even more affectionately and kissed her forehead with a smile.
"Alright, then we won't call him A-Gui. We can call him A-Hua, or if it's a boy, we can call him A-Bao, or A-Suo."
Lin Xu reached out to push his shoulder, but instead he pressed her down and gently sealed her lips with his.
"Whatever you want to name our baby, it's up to you, Xuxu."
"—As long as you are safe and sound, that's all that matters."
She felt a warm sensation in her eyes, and her throat tightened, almost giving herself away. She suppressed the bitterness in her heart and reached out to touch his chest, his arms, and his strong and broad back.
The area was already covered in scars. These were all marks left by the hardships he had endured and the near-death experiences he had survived over the years. The most gruesome wound, however, was on his left arm.
That day at Shaojing Garden, he burst into her room covered in blood. Later, when she was being harassed by the household, he didn't hesitate to personally reopen her almost healed wound.
The splattered crimson stains on the bed back then still feel like they happened just yesterday.
Over all this time, if she asked herself honestly, although Dou Yanxun was sometimes unpredictable and sometimes sarcastic, he had never truly mistreated her even once.
On the contrary, he has always done his best to protect her, safeguard her safety, and support all her eccentric and unrestrained behavior.
Dou Yanxun.
She called his name softly in the silence, her voice hoarse, like that of a pitiful little animal.
Dou Yanxun smiled slightly and hugged the person in his arms even tighter.
"If, I mean if one day... I do something stupid..."
Before he could finish speaking, he rolled over and sat up, leaning down to look at her. Her face was still as beautiful as ever, even more captivating in the night, yet it held a hint of sadness.
His heart tightened, thinking that she was just being thoughtful during her pregnancy, and that the late hour had made her more sentimental. He braced himself with his hands, forming an impenetrable wall around her, shutting out all the storms of the outside world.
"How could someone as intelligent as you do something foolish?"
Before she could open her mouth again, his voice flowed into her lips, accompanied by endless tenderness.
“Even if you do it, I will accompany you. If you do one foolish thing, I will clean up after you. If you do a hundred things, I will clean up after you a hundred things.”
"What if it's difficult to clean?"
Dou Yanxun looked at her hazy face and thought to himself that Princess Kunrou had gone missing some time ago. She had risked her life to plead for her, and he had already let her do such a thing as confiscating her family property and exterminating her clan. Could there be anything more difficult to handle than this?
But when he spoke, he was extremely solemn.
"...Even if you do a hundred or a thousand foolish or wrong things, I will allow you to do them."
"...Xuxu, if I can't even protect you in these things, then what's the point of marrying me?"
She turned her head, trying to force back the tears welling up in her eyes. The two embraced for a few more moments, and soon, after a busy day, Dou Yanxun's even breathing could be heard in her ear. He was fast asleep.
Lin Xu gazed at the bright reflection falling in front of the window, feeling utterly confused. She leaned on her pillow, searching for a dream, but the dream vanished and the lamp went out. (1) What will she be doing at this time tomorrow? And what about him?
Lin Xu was in a daze all night, half asleep and half awake. When she woke up, she felt that half of her face was covered with coldness, and then she realized that there were tear stains on her pillow.
As she stood up, Zhu Ling quickly stepped forward and asked with concern, "Madam, did you have a nightmare last night? Did you not sleep well?"
She sighed deeply, feeling utterly weak, yet she could only force herself to sit up. The pillow beside her was, as usual, empty. Zhu Ling said:
“Early this morning, the master’s servant came to invite the second master, but the two have already left. The second master specifically instructed that you need not be disturbed.”
Dou Yanzhou... must be getting impatient right now.
Yesterday, after she relayed the Princess's words back to Madam Bai, Madam Bai was quite dissatisfied, insisting on keeping Dou Yanzhou's current official position. Such wishful thinking left Lin Xu speechless, but in Madam Bai's eyes, it became that she was arrogant and indifferent, failing to help the eldest branch of the family through their difficulties.
The two men under Yu Shi were imprisoned by the Censorate the day before yesterday. If there is no further action, Dou Yanzhou will probably be imprisoned within the next day or two.
Lin Xu lowered her eyes and stroked her lower abdomen. A storm was brewing, and whether she was prepared or not, she had to act now.
She had no appetite, so she quickly ate a few bites of breakfast and moved to a side hall. There, she wrote two letters at the table, sealed them with wax, and instructed Rongwei to send them out of the mansion immediately.
After finishing these tasks, Lin Xu hurriedly put on a moon-white fox fur cloak and led Zhu Ling to the front of Lingbo Garden.
After the incident with An Chan, even though Lingbo Garden was still overgrown with weeds, several maids were now guarding the gate. When they saw Lin Xu, they did not dare to stop her, but bowed and said in a low voice, "Second Madam, First Madam has already gone to bed."
Lin Xu's eyes were cold as he said, "This is the last time. If she doesn't open the door, I will never come again."
Lianhe dared not make a sound and quickly withdrew. Lin Xu and Zhu Ling stood in front of the door, a cold wind blowing in the courtyard, the shadows of the trees fluttering in the wind, and occasionally a low crow flapping its wings and skimming past the branches. After waiting for an unknown amount of time, Lianhe finally came forward hurriedly, "Second Madam, the First Madam invites you."
The courtyard was unusually quiet. Spring flowers had not yet bloomed, fallen leaves had not been swept away, and withered plum petals piled on the steps, as if the entire courtyard had been frozen in time after an old snowfall. This was also the first time Lin Xu had seen Feng Daizhu since he went to Laining.
Although she had prepared herself mentally, when she saw the person lying on the bed again, she couldn't help but freeze behind Lianhe, speechless for a long time.
The curtains beside the couch hung low, perhaps from the long-burning incense of the northern lands, its scent indescribably strong and cold. The woman on the couch was emaciated, her face deathly pale, but her eyes remained as bright as ever.
Where is that northern rose of yesteryear, so vibrant and vying for spring's favor?
Hearing the noise, Feng Daizhu knew that Lin Xu had arrived. She tried to sit up, but her body was too weak, and she had to give up after several attempts.
Seeing this, Lianhe quickly stepped forward to help Feng Daizhu up, and then placed two comfortable pillows behind her before bowing her head and retreating.
The light in the eyes of that half-sitting, sickly figure vanished in an instant when he saw Lin Xu's swollen belly, replaced by a deep sense of desolation.
"...You've arrived."
Lin Xu sat down on a chair not far from the bed, looking at Feng Daizhu's haggard and bloodless face, and couldn't help but feel quite emotional, saying softly:
"It has been a long time since I last saw my sister-in-law. Now I am fortunate enough to have a few private words with her."
Having been bedridden for a long time, Feng Daizhu rarely sat up to see the scenery outside the window. For a moment, she stared at it intently, almost mesmerized.
Winter has passed and spring has come; it's another year of the Gengchen year.
Lin Xu sighed softly, "All things in this world are like fleeting clouds, all are illusions."
Feng Daizhu turned her head, her eyes fixed intently on Lin Xu, and after a long while, a look of realization dawned on her face:
"...You are still so gentle and pure, just like when I first met you. At that time, I knew...this woman must be extraordinary."
Lin Xu felt a pang of sadness, recalling the times when the two of them used to chat and exchange pleasantries. Back then, Feng Daizhu was so popular in the Dou family, and her fiery beauty had faded away in the strict and austere Dou family mansion, which saddened her as well.
My mind involuntarily drifted back to Mu Wenjun's sigh from yesterday: "This world is full of places that devour people..."
She came to her senses and said, "My sister-in-law seems to be living in seclusion these days. I have tried to see her several times, but she has stopped me. I wonder why she still wants to interfere in the troubles in the mansion?"
Feng Daizhu's eyes curved into a smile as if she had heard a funny joke, but fine lines were already faintly visible. In just half a year, she had aged considerably and was no longer the youthful and radiant woman she once was.
"Why wouldn't I be happy to have someone come to my door offering to get rid of a thorn in my side?"
Seeing Lin Xu remain silent, Feng Daizhu coughed lightly a few times, then smiled gently:
"Do you think you've finally seen through me? Lin Xu, I've never been a kind person."
"In the past, Granny Zhao secretly drugged you. She was a trusted confidante of mine, so how could I not have noticed? We were on good terms in public, and I knew you treated me well, but for some reason, I didn't stop her back then, and even tacitly allowed Granny Zhao and that girl to tamper with the medicinal food you were given..."
"Now that I've become like this, it's probably all retribution."
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