Now that Tian Tian is back, Shen Lingling's tense heart can finally relax.
Tian Tian did not discuss anything about the children with Shen Lingling. After listening to Shen Lingling's words for a few minutes, she started talking about some gossip about their school.
Although Shen Lingling didn't know much about Tian Tian's school, she listened with great interest. While listening, she felt a little sad, thinking that between the two of them, she knew the most gossip, and Tian Tian just listened to her.
But now the situation is reversed. It is Tian Tian who is telling her gossip. Sometimes she also wants to tell Tian Tian something, but when she opens her mouth, she finds that all she can say is about the children and Fang Siwen, so she loses interest in talking.
Even in this rare moment of relaxation, Shen Lingling was still worried about her child at home. She only sat there for about an hour, thinking that the child should be breastfeeding by now, and then said goodbye to Tian Tian and went home.
On the way home, Shen Lingling felt more and more sad. She also wanted to sit leisurely at Tian Tian's house for an afternoon without any worries, without having to think about anything, just laughing and talking about gossip.
She really couldn't control her own thoughts. While listening to Tian Tian talking, she kept thinking about how Niu Niu was doing now. Did Niu Niu cry when she didn’t see her? Did Niuniu go to the toilet? And is Niuniu hungry?
She couldn't sit still at Tian Tian's house.
When Shen Lingling got home, she heard Niu Niu crying. She went into the house with heartache and saw Niu Niu struggling uncontrollably in her mother's arms. Her face was red from crying. When she saw her mother come in, Niu Niu reached out for a hug.
When Shen's mother saw Shen Lingling coming back, she felt very upset. "I just changed her diaper, and Niuniu started crying again. I tried to comfort her for a long time but failed. I think she might be hungry."
This kid rarely gets out to relax.
Shen Lingling looked at Niu Niu crying and wanted to cry too. She silently held Niu Niu in her arms, lifted her clothes and fed her.
As soon as Niu Niu drank milk, she stopped crying. Shen Lingling looked at the child and started crying herself.
She was really miserable. She needed her own time and space, but no one, whether her child or her mother, felt that she needed her own time.
She felt that she was horrible. She wanted to go out and spend time with her friends while she was at home, but when she was with her friends, she thought about her children at home.
She also felt that she was not a qualified mother. She would feel annoyed by the child and feel very complicated when she saw the child. When the child cried and she could not get a full night's sleep, she would have very dark thoughts in her mind and want to strangle the child to death. She knew that this was wrong, but she had no choice.
She didn't dare tell her parents, because they would think she was being pretentious and would say that her life was much better now than when her mother gave birth to her and her brother.
After waiting for the child to finish drinking milk, he gradually fell asleep under Shen Lingling's comfort. Shen Lingling's mood also gradually calmed down.
She wiped her tears, put the child down, and went out to wash her face.
Mother Shen stood outside and looked at Shen Lingling with concern, "Is the child okay?"
When Shen Lingling heard that her mother's first words were not about her concern, she felt a little sad. She forced a smile and said, "She's fine. She's already asleep. I'll go wash my face."
Mother Shen nodded, "I'll go make you some steamed egg cakes. You've worked hard feeding the baby. Eat something delicious to replenish your body. Dad, he'll go up the mountain to see if he can catch a pheasant for you to replenish your body. If not, kill a chicken at home. Don't let the baby grow up well and your body suffer again."
Shen Lingling felt warm in her heart. Her parents still cared about her. "No need, Mom. Just steam an egg cake for me. I just ate the chicken rack that Tian Tian brought back at noon. I can't eat much at night, so just a bite will be enough."
In winter, everyone is used to eating two meals a day, but Shen Lingling now eats three meals a day. Because breastfeeding is really nutritious, Shen's mother gives Shen Lingling an extra meal every day, and often makes more to prevent Shen Lingling from getting hungry in the middle of the night while breastfeeding.
"What are you saying? She's my daughter. There's no need for mother and daughter to thank each other." After saying that, Mother Shen went to steam the egg cake. Shen Lingling also took the time to sleep for a while.
In the next few days, Shen Lingling did not go to find Tian Tian. Tian Tian said that if Shan didn't come, she would come. She came to find Shen Lingling several times. Every time Shen Lingling was either breastfeeding or sleeping. When they met occasionally, Shen Lingling was not in the mood to chat and was in a trance. After several times, Tian Tian felt that she was always disturbing Shen Lingling's rest, so she stopped coming.
Tian Tian stayed at home for two days. After finishing her work, she locked herself in the room to study.
Tian Tian told Grandma Tian about bringing the radio back. After the family gathered together to watch the radio for a while, Grandma Tian ignored Tian Zhuo who was looking at the radio reluctantly, took the radio to Tian Tian's room, and urged Tian Tian to study at home every day.
When Tian Tian was studying, Old Lady Tian also curiously went over to take a look and was shocked by the foreign language Tian Tian heard.
Old Mrs. Tian didn’t understand these things. She only remembered that in the past few years, she was not allowed to have anything to do with these foreign things.
Now when Tian Tian heard this, she was terrified.
Later, Old Lady Tian never showed up when Tian Tian was studying again. Sometimes when Tian Tian was studying in the house, if someone came to find Old Lady Tian and asked about Tian Tian, Old Lady Tian would even help cover up and say that Tian Tian was not at home or that Tian Tian was sleeping in the house, for fear that others would know and it would have a bad influence on Tian Tian.
When Tian Tian found out about this, she didn't know whether to laugh or cry. She told Old Lady Tian that it was okay, as it was allowed to study foreign things now, and she was studying a serious major at a serious university, so it was not illegal.
But the ten years of experience have been engraved in Mrs. Tian's bones. Mrs. Tian only believes in her own judgment and continues to do her own thing.
Seeing Old Lady Tian like this, Tian Tian followed her.
Tian Tian studied in the house during the day, and at night she took the radio to Old Lady Tian's room. The family sat together, listened to the radio for a while, and then went back to their own rooms to sleep.
There were no entertainment facilities at that time, and radios were rarely seen in their brigade.
As a result, Chen Guihua and Tian Mu came over every night to listen to the radio. When Chen Guihua went home at night, Tian Mu would just stay at their house.
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