Chapter 25 A Match Made in Heaven
"Why haven't you come out yet?" Yanru waited for an hour, and the woman's patience was exhausted. She paced back and forth under the tree, staring at the entrance of the Imperial Examination Hall, wishing she could rush in and grab someone on the spot.
Liu Xiang felt strange: "At this point, it should be time to hand in the papers and leave."
"Don't you know? This year," the middle-aged man next to him continued, nodding towards the Imperial Examination Hall, "there's cheating. You know what I mean? I guess we'll have to wait a while."
"Cheating?" Liu Xiang and Yanru were surprised.
The man spoke in a serious tone, lowering his voice and speaking mysteriously, "Yes, they caught us the day before the exam. Someone put the cheat sheet in a shoe horn and was discovered when they took it out. That candidate was taken straight to the prison. My brother is the prison boss, seriously, believe me."
"No wonder it's taking so long." Liu Xiang was worried. "If cheating is discovered, the exam will be suspended, the room will be cleared and inspected, which will delay the exam for quite a while, and the departure time will also be delayed. My friend was already nervous, and with something like this happening in the exam room, I wonder if she can still finish the exam with peace of mind."
"It's over! I'm afraid Si Rui went crazy in the exam room." Yanru's worry was tinged with a touch of schadenfreude. She had always secretly resented the fact that Zheng Si Rui was prettier than she was. Honestly, although she had decided early on not to take the imperial examination, she didn't want any of her classmates to pass and show any signs of doing better than she did. So, she instinctively anticipated Zheng Si Rui's hands shaking, unable to hold a pen, unable to write, and handing in a blank paper.
"A blessing in disguise." The middle-aged man acted like an old man, having seen a lot of things. "If you ask me, it's better if someone cheats. If someone cheats, the emperor will know, get angry, and investigate more strictly. Those who try to use connections, replace others, and smuggle money will all be dealt with. Then girls like us from ordinary families will have more hope."
"Old man, what you said is absolutely right." Liu Xiang bowed to thank the man for his comfort. He and Yanru shared a few pieces of fruit. As the sun set, the bell for the end of the exam finally rang amid the long-awaited calls of all the candidates' relatives and friends:
"Bang—bang—"
The gates flung open, and candidates filed out. Young women, faces a mixture of joy and sorrow, hurried in all directions. Liu Xiang and Yanru searched for a long time among the bustling crowd before they spotted Zheng Sirui, clutching something, appearing at the gate, her steps slow and unsteady. Her mind wandered, and she stumbled over the high threshold, nearly falling.
"We're here!" Liu Xiang waved over there, guiding the clay sculpture-like figure towards them. Zheng Sirui reached her friend's side, and just as she was halfway through her speech, her stomach churned. She immediately bent over, bracing herself against a tree trunk and retching, her head sinking heavily. Her stomach was clearly empty, and there was no filth on the ground, but the sound of her throat and the movement were so loud that it seemed as if she was going to vomit out all her internal organs.
People were coming and going all around, most of them dressed in splendid attire. Yanru felt Zheng Sirui's behavior was shameful, so she hid behind Liu Xiang, trying to distance herself from the embarrassing scene. "It's just a test, is it that serious?"
Zheng Sirui gradually recovered, propping herself up against a tree. The past four days must have been rough. Her hair had undone, her long black hair drooping around her ears in greasy wisps. Her face was greasy, her large eyes stained with dark circles, the whites bloodshot. Furthermore, the intensity of the experience had forced tears and snot out of her eyes, leaving her in a state of disarray, far from being "pretty." Yanru was dressed up today, a rare moment when she looked prettier than she was. Without a word, she lifted her veil and used a handkerchief to wipe Zheng Sirui's face, soothing her breath. She tilted her carefully tended face to her side, her hands moving with concern, her head raised, flirting with all directions, wishing Liu Xiang could capture her immediately so he could always recall this once-in-a-lifetime moment of stunning beauty.
Unfortunately, Liu Xiang was dull. He opened Yanru's kettle and handed it to Zheng Sirui slowly: "We heard what happened inside."
"I almost didn't finish." Zheng Sirui sniffed. "It was a cleanup check, and they were testing my math skills. There was one problem, and I finally figured out the solution, but then I stopped and started fussing. When I went back to writing, I forgot how to solve it. My mind was completely foggy, and the math at the end was a mess."
Liu Xiang asked, "What about the three gates at the back?"
Zheng Sirui replied blankly, "I did finish it, but I don't know how it went. It was all muddled. I don't think it was good at all. I'm done. I won't pass the exam."
"The exam's over, why are you still thinking about this? Let's go! Liu Xiang is treating us to dinner, let's go." Yanru said nonchalantly, pulling Zheng Sirui away. The sudden touch of skin on her arm made Zheng Sirui shudder. She suddenly squatted down, buried her head in her lap, and cried hysterically, "I'm done. I didn't write well at all. I'm done. I can't pass the exam."
Ten years of hard study culminate in the imperial examination. Thousands of days and nights of anticipation came to an end, and Zheng Sirui collapsed on her bed like a scarecrow in the fields with its frame removed, unable to tell whether she was sick or not. Yi Bin's maid, Cai Yuan, arrived with a note, inviting her to stay at the Yi residence for a while, but she excused herself, saying she wasn't feeling well, and stayed at the academy. She used to study hard whenever she had some free time, but now, with nothing to do, she felt just like Yanru. She opened a book, dizzy and unable to read a single word. She spent the better part of a month in a daze, and with the results still a long way off, she simply found a bunch of work to do. She was so busy that she fell asleep as soon as she returned to her room, no longer having time to think about her results.
When the peach blossoms on Qingxiu Mountain bloomed, the imperial examination results were finally announced.
The Imperial Examination Hall was busier than the day of the exam. Long before dawn, carriages and horses lined the distance, servants crowded in front, awaiting the results for their masters. Many common people clustered around the display boards, some clasping their hands in prayer for the Buddha's blessing, some consulting impromptu Taoist priests at nearby stalls for fortune-telling, and some, beaming with pride, as if fame and fortune were already assured. Amidst the clamor, Liu Xiang accompanied Zheng Sirui to the front to await the results. Yanru, unwilling to join the crowd and smell the sweat, stood in the shade of a tree, withdrawing from the crowd and checking her makeup. After all, there were many young men present, accompanied by their sisters. Even though she was a stunning beauty, she needed to be prepared for being approached; this was the cultivation of a beauty.
The person who posted the list of candidates emerged, greeted by hundreds of expectant gazes. Amidst the crowd's eager anticipation, a scattered stream of people streamed toward the entrance of the Imperial Examination Hall. Tears of joy and grief echoed in unison, and Yanru's heart was torn, a balance of emotions. She hoped Zheng Sirui would pass the imperial examination and rise to prominence, so she could boast about being a close friend of a court lady in the capital. She'd heard others say, "To have such a close friend, she must be an exceptionally intelligent and talented woman." But somewhere, in a dark and cramped corner of her heart, a voice whispered, eagerly hoping Zheng Sirui would fail. True, her failure would be of no benefit to her, yet she couldn't help but yearn for her to fail. Women in the Sui Dynasty could take the imperial examinations, but unlike men, they couldn't continue until old age. If a woman failed to pass the examination by the age of twenty-five, she would never again be allowed to take the examinations. Zheng Sirui had become pale, emaciated, and haggard from studying for the imperial examinations, her beauty fading. Yanru, jealous of her natural beauty and intelligence, felt a surge of joy at seeing her withered. She knew Zheng Sirui was fragile; if she failed the exam, she would go half-mad, half-witted, and only then would her ugliness continue. She was tired of hearing everyone praise her beauty on the street, and tired of every man except Liu Xiang leaping over her to stare at her. The loneliness of the gatherings and the sadness of her fruitless pursuit of Lu Zhiling seemed to return, fueling Yanru's malice. She prayed fervently toward the Tiekan Temple on Qingxiu Mountain, hoping that Zheng Sirui's ten years of hard work would be wasted. If she failed the exam this year, she would try again next year, repeatedly failing until she reached the age of twenty-five, too old and unattractive to marry. And she, You Yanru, became the wife of a high-ranking official as wealthy as Qi Fengning, doing nothing all day long, arranging flowers and drinking tea. Perhaps she was so kind that she let the ugly and poor Zheng Sirui come to her home to work as a nanny and earn some money for food.
"Pfft—hehe." Yanru's dreamy smile was charming and charming. At this moment, the huddle of people pushed Zheng Sirui and Liu Xiang out. From a distance, Yanru couldn't see their expressions clearly, so she hurried to meet them. Liu Xiang stared at Zheng Sirui anxiously, as if afraid she would do something extreme. As for Zheng Sirui, she frowned, bit her lip, and breathed heavily, trying her best to suppress her emotions.
Did you really fail the exam? Yanru was overjoyed. She took two or three steps to Zheng Sirui's side and grabbed her shoulders. "What's wrong? Did you fail the exam? It's okay. Let Liu Lang introduce you to a good husband tomorrow. He has many classmates. Otherwise, my mother's embroidery shop is short of staff. I'll write a letter and ask her to give you something to do. It's okay. Don't make it too difficult."
"Yanru," Zheng Sirui didn't listen to a word she said. She jumped up and hugged Yanru's shoulders. "Yanru, I passed the exam! This is the best score I've gotten since I came to the capital! Yanru! I passed the exam!"
Winning the first place in the imperial examination, even though she was a stranger in a foreign land, many of her former acquaintances came to Guanyan Academy, bearing gifts of all sizes, to congratulate her on her successful Jinshi degree. The once despised and destitute Jinling resident finally found her feet. She shed her shabby, pilling clothes and donned the dark blue outer skirt designated by the Ministry of Rites for female officials. She adorned her waist with a jade-inlaid gold and silver belt. Then, with high spirits, she mounted her five-colored horse and rode among the parade of officials, earning the admiration of the crowd. Yanru and Liu Xiang stood beneath the stone archway, watching Zheng Sirui parade through the streets, filled with envy: "What a grand spectacle! So impressive!"
Liu Xiang took her hand and left the bustling crowd. "How can I not be so impressive, little ancestor? The capital has twelve quotas for female officials every year, which is even fewer than the quota for men. Those who can pass the exam are truly the best of the best. She has finally made it."
Yanru said, "Liu Lang, wait until next year when you pass the exam and become a high-ranking official. I will sit behind you and patrol the streets with you. Everyone will see me then, and everyone will know that I have such a good husband, and that I will become the wife of an official!"
"Yanru, I just wanted to tell you something." Liu Xiang's tone became serious, and he didn't smile. He straightened Yanru's shoulders and met her eyes. "I've made a decision. I don't want to take the imperial examination anymore. I want to be a pipa player and specialize in studying the lost music and famous pieces of music from the previous dynasty."
"What?!" Yanru was furious. "What are you talking about in your sleep? Are you still asleep?!"
Liu Xiang said, "No, I've thought about it many times. I really don't like the intrigues and deceptions of the officialdom. I just want to spend my life accompanied by music and be the Li Guinian of the Sui Dynasty."
"You're sick!" Yanru shook off Liu Xiang's hand. "Why are you playing the pipa instead of pursuing a career in officialdom? What's the point of being Li Guinian, Li Yunian, and Li Xia Nian? I, You Yanru, want to be the wife of a noble family in this life! Didn't you say last time that you were ashamed of yourself and felt you weren't worthy of me? Marriage has always been about marrying the rich and the poor. You don't want to take the exam to become an official, but you still think you're worthy of me? Every time we meet, we either go hiking or boating. Listening to you play the pipa and sing is enough for me. Liu Xiang, can you please be more motivated and let me go to a banquet and hear the clanging of bells?"
Liu Xiang complained, "Yanru, my ancestors aren't as prominent as yours, but even though your father works in the palace, he doesn't hold an official position. He's at least a county magistrate, the head of a county. Our family has land and shops, so we don't have to worry about food and drink. It's not as bad as you say."
"I don't care!" Yanru cursed, "Anyway, we must be well-matched, well-matched! My ancestors are prominent, so you should marry me with a prominent family background! I think you are just idle and have nothing better to do than think about those messy things. If you were like Zheng Sirui, whose family was so poor that they had to beg for food, you would probably be more eager to become an official than she is."
Liu Xiang wanted to say something, but Yanru ignored him, covering her ears and sprinting back to the academy. In her rage, she didn't even hear the doorman trying to hand her a note. The doorman called out to her for a long time before she finally stopped and took the note. The familiar handwriting came into view.
The extreme sorrow and joy alternated so frequently that Yanru could not bear it any longer. She screamed and stepped back, almost falling down.
On the other side, Zheng Sirui, accompanied by the sound of suona and drums, braved the scorching sun as she toured the streets of the capital. Even though she was riding a horse, she felt quite tired. After two hours of hard work, the ceremony came to an end. She was exhausted, her neck was sore, and she just wanted to throw herself on the bed and have a good sleep. She didn't have a new house to live in for the time being, so she continued to eat and live in Guanyan Academy. As soon as her sedan chair landed, a little maid rushed out from nowhere and tugged at her dress: "Miss Zheng - no, Lord Zheng, my daughter said she wants to see you. Please come when you have time."
The little maid looked familiar; her nose and mouth resembled Caiyuan, Yi Bin's maid. She was no more than eleven or twelve years old, and her tears were streaming down her face, making her look particularly pitiful. Zheng Sirui patted her hands and soothed her, "Are you the little maid from the Yi family? You look like Caiyuan. Did Yi Bin want to see me? Why didn't Caiyuan come?"
The little maid nodded repeatedly and sobbed, "Yes, Caiyuan is my biological sister. My name is Jinyuan. My sister was beaten with a stick and couldn't get out of bed, so the young lady asked me to come."
"What?!" Zheng Sirui sensed something was amiss. Without even bothering to go inside and change, she hurriedly grabbed Jin Yuan and jumped into the sedan chair, rushing towards the Yi residence. She was still wearing her official uniform and a crown. Madam Yi, mindful of her official position, treated her kindly and allowed her into Yi Bin's courtyard. She also said to her, "Sir Zheng, please try to persuade Luofu. You're Luofu's good friend. She might not listen to us, but she might listen to you."
Zheng Sirui was bewildered. The Yi Mansion was festooned with lanterns and colorful decorations, many windows adorned with large red wedding characters, and the ground was littered with firecracker confetti. Despite the bustling atmosphere, the servants wore expressions of fear, and a faint sadness hung in the air, jarringly at odds with the mansion's decor. Zheng Sirui followed Jin Yuan through many twists and turns until they reached the gate of Yi Bin's courtyard. Jin Yuan said she didn't want to see anyone from the Yi family, and asked Master Zheng to go in alone.
Pushing open the wooden door, two camphor trees were planted in the courtyard, their branches reluctantly tied to several large lanterns. The swing frame looked quite old, and the ropes were half-worn, probably a favorite of the owner. The wood of the swing was painted red, and the clash of old and new was quite awkward. Zheng Sirui walked in and felt a sense of terror - it was dusk, the setting sun, and the sunlight fell sparingly on a window in a corner. The huge and spacious house was hidden in the haze, and the doors and windows were densely nailed with wooden boards that were as wide as a palm and as thick as a thumb. The gaps that could not be nailed were wrapped with thorns. Apart from the bed and tea sets, there was no hard and sharp object in the house. The wooden splinters and iron nails were hideous. The once exquisite boudoir with carved beams and painted buildings looked like a prison in the sky. Just one look made the hair stand on end.
"Yi Bin! Yi Bin? Yi Luofu? Yi Luofu?" Zheng Sirui touched the jade on her belt for courage and forced herself to walk inside. Through the pitifully small gap, there was no one in the dark and cramped room. She walked to the deepest part, where the golden sunset was smeared on the window frame. Yi Bin leaned against the wall, curled up in the little sunlight. She may have been immersed in grief for a long time. Her hair was messy, and she was wearing plain underwear. She leaned her head against the window frame with a smile on her lips. Seeing that Zheng Sirui did not stand up, she greeted her casually: "Come on, this dress suits you very well."
This boudoir, transformed into a cage, made Zheng Sirui tremble with fear. "I'm sorry, I thought I wouldn't pass the exam a few days ago and thought you were just asking me to be your guest... Is there going to be a wedding at your house?"
"It's my family's wedding, not mine." Yi Bin rested his fingertips on the wooden board, tearing away the rough wood thorns on the edge. "Didn't You Yanru tell you?"
"Yanru? She didn't say anything?"
"Oh, no wonder Caiyuan looked for you several times, but you didn't come. I knew it." Yi Bin never had any extravagant expectations of You Yanru's character. He calmly told Zheng Sirui the whole story. "On the day of burning incense at Tiekan Temple, after parting with you, I met a man. He was a monk in the temple. He was originally the eldest son of a farmer named Liang near the capital. When he was young, his family was poor, so his parents sent him to Tiekan Temple to become a monk and make a living. He was very good and knew some medical skills. He told me which fruits on this mountain were poisonous and I must not touch them. He could hear my thoughts in the sound of the flute and found Buddhist scriptures for me to calm the situation. He would spend his own savings to offer lamps in my name at the temple—do you know what name he used on the lamp he offered me? Yining, that's the name I gave myself as a child. Binbin, half refined and half refined. My father used to say I was naughty and mischievous, so he used the character "Bin" as my name. Later, because "Bin" sounded too masculine and would make marriage proposals difficult, he changed it to "Luofu." But I don't like being called Yibin or Yiluofu. I just want to be called Yining, as Ning means Ning, Ning represents a wish, and Ning represents what is desired. I told him about the name, and without further ado, he changed the lamp's name to Yining.
Unfortunately, not long after, my father got engaged to the Ma family. On the day you went to take the imperial examination, I went out under the pretext of sending you to the examination hall. I told the coachman that I saw you go in to take the exam and that I couldn't take the exam myself. The scene brought back memories and made me sad, so I asked him to take me to the Old Imperial Examination Hall to stay quiet. In fact, that was an appointment I had made with him. We were planning to elope there, but we ran into You Yanru and Liu Jiansheng. I asked You Yanru to tell you that I was getting engaged and asked you to come to the Yi Mansion after the exam so that she could discuss my future plans with me. She must have felt uncomfortable seeing that I was marrying into the wealthy and powerful Ma family, and she was jealous of our good relationship, so she deliberately kept it a secret from you.
Zheng Sirui couldn't tell whether Yi Bin's unconventional love or Yan Ru's moody childish temper was outrageous: "What happened next? What happened next?"
Yi Bin said, "The Yi Mansion is crowded with people, and the servants are terrified of my father. I had hoped you could help me out there, find a carriage, and pass on the message. Unfortunately, you didn't arrive, so we agreed to meet me outside the back door of my house after he returned to secular life. Unfortunately, the news leaked out, and Caiyuan was caught by my mother, beaten with thirty boards, and thrown into the woodshed. As for him, I don't know what happened to him, but I heard that my father also beat him. Then, I was locked up here, waiting to get married in three days." She took out two pieces of paper from her bosom and threw them to Zheng Sirui through the gap: "I'm sorry for Caiyuan. She and I grew up together, and I made her suffer. This is her indenture. When the time comes, take this to my parents and tell them that I sold Caiyuan to you. If you take office, you will be a fifth-rank official. My father's official position is lower than yours, so he won't dare to disapprove. Take Caiyuan away and save her."
The bond still clung to Yi Bin's scent. Zheng Sirui tucked it against her chest, feeling the warmth of her friend and recalling their past. Zheng Sirui couldn't understand Yi Bin's choice: "I don't understand. Yanru often talks about 'a bamboo gate against a bamboo gate, a red gate against a red gate.' Although I find it somewhat offensive, I have to agree. After all, wasn't Lu Zhiling and I a mismatched match back then? He didn't understand me, and I didn't understand him. Our subsequent separation was incredibly awkward. Yi Bin, I'm not questioning your choice, but is it worth it? You've been pampered since childhood. If you could escape and marry a monk with nothing, would it be worth it?"
"That's not what I think." Yi Bin shook his head. "The difference in social status between you and Lu Zhiling isn't the fault. It's just that he's too cowardly. A lot of people have asked me this question these days. My mother even said that I've had it too easy since I was a kid, so I don't have the energy to think about love. If I were reborn into a poor family like Liang Qiang, I'd know how great it is to marry into the Ma family.
But why make such an analogy? In a poor family, not having enough to eat and warm clothes is a tragedy. Then, for me to have enough food and clothes to marry into the Ma family, and to spend my whole life in a high-class courtyard without seeing the sun, at the mercy of my husband, isn’t that a tragedy? I can’t do that. I studied at Qiushui Academy for two years. Without these two years, I would still have sat in that sedan chair numbly, but these two years made me understand. I don’t want to be a puppet, I don’t want to be my father’s tool, I don’t want to be a pet of the Ma family, helping my father to win over the superiors and continue the Ma family line. I don’t want this. I can only live in this one life, and in this life, I can never eat and drink all day long. I want to choose the life I want to live.”
Zheng Sirui asked, "But, to bet your future on a man and sever all ties with your parents and clan, aren't you afraid of regretting it?"
"Why do you regret it?" Yi Bin stared into Zheng Sirui's eyes. "I won't regret it. This is my choice. You know, Sirui, this is a choice I made on my own, from my heart." She became excited, a blush spreading across her pale face. "Sirui, you used to suffer so hard to study. That was the choice you could make for your life. I wanted to escape and not marry into the Ma family. That was the choice I made for mine. The only difference between you and me is that you relied on your ambition, while I relied on my love. Do you understand? I just want that choice. From childhood to adulthood, I didn't even have the freedom to choose my own name. I didn't have the freedom to choose. I just wanted that freedom, that's all. Sirui, I don't think my future happiness will depend on marrying the Ma family or Liang Qiang. Perhaps Liang Qiang will become Lu Zhiling in the future, but that doesn't matter anymore. I don't want to be dependent on the Ma family, nor do I ever want to be dependent on Liang Qiang. I can read, I can recite the Four Books and Five Classics, and I can do things just like you. What matters is that I have the freedom to choose and can still leave him.
Si Rui, I know you've been brooding over your relationship with Lu Zhiling for so long, and you deeply regret why you chose to be with him in the first place. I don't know how many times we'll see each other again from now on, so I want to tell you that your future is bright. You will rise to prominence and realize your dreams. So don't dwell on past love, don't let this matter cause you any more pain. Lu Zhiling's low status is his own business, don't let his low status torment you, Lord Zheng. Let yourself go. Life is long, and you never know what will happen. Be happy in those days, and be true to yourself. That's enough."
Zheng Sirui wiped the tears from her face, put her hand into the gap, and stroked her face: "Now, what else do you need me to do?"
Yi Bin closed his eyes and smiled sadly, "No need. If possible, please find out where he is and check if he's seriously injured."
"Okay." Zheng Sirui nodded vigorously. She looked around, making sure there was no one in the courtyard. She quietly hid something close to her body in her palm, reached in, and held Yi Bin's hand. Yi Bin was startled by the cold and hard touch and opened his eyes, looking at Zheng Sirui in confusion.
Zheng Sirui pinched Yi Bin's hand tightly: "I brought this from Jinling. It's for self-defense. Cutting things is the best, but remember, don't hurt yourself when using it."
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[Mumbling]: There is not much Yanru in this chapter, but it is actually to contrast with the future Yanru, and to hide many foreshadowings.
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