(Friendly reminder: This chapter is not suitable for reading while eating.)
The laughter around the campfire gradually subsided, but the conversation between Li Yuheng and Shu Bai had clearly flipped some strange switch.
Yu You picked up the durian candy that had fallen on the ground, blew on it, and was about to put it in her mouth when Wu Yue swiftly slapped it away.
He was slightly embarrassed, then thought about Li Yuheng's words for a moment, and then clapped his hands as if he had suddenly realized something:
"Oh! I get it! Just like in the cartoons! So... so what's on my butt might be... um... a... rice ball? Or a durian? No, no, durian smells too strong... Ah! Maybe it'll be a hairstyle like the pile of poop on Lazy Sheep's head!"
He laughed after saying that, "Because I always oversleep and almost miss the meeting!"
Everyone burst into good-natured laughter again.
President Chen Niansha sighed, "Yu You, you don't have to be so honest..."
Li Rui also chimed in happily: "If there has to be a symbol... I hope it would be a tree or a peace symbol. I love hiking because I love trees and nature. Being able to stay quiet, feel life, and protect the environment is just wonderful."
Everyone nodded in agreement.
Wu Yue first gestured to Yu You with her eyes not to eat the things on the ground before speaking: "Then I should be... um... the character '勇' (yong, meaning courage/brave)? Or a simple drawing of a hiking stick? After all, I am the woman who will conquer all the peaks!"
"Wu Yue is amazing!" A teammate immediately chimed in.
"My turn! My turn!" A male beta player raised his hand. "I think I have to be the one who works the hardest! Whether it's finishing final papers or planning club activities, I'm always the one working the latest!"
"That's so true, bro!" Another teammate patted him on the shoulder, sharing his sentiment.
“Then I’m probably the ‘pigeon’ type…” another girl said a little shyly in a low voice, “I can stand someone up eight out of ten times if they ask me out… unless it’s something like hiking, once it’s booked, there’s no going back…”
"Hahaha, I get you, sis! Me too!"
"Me! Me! Me! I think mine is a game controller!" a boy raised his hand.
“Then I have to be the guitar!” another girl chimed in with a laugh.
"Hot pot! It has to be a hot pot design!" a slightly chubby Alpha shouted, patting his belly.
"A book? Or a question mark? I'm a bit of a homebody..." a quiet-looking omega said softly.
The atmosphere grew increasingly lively, with everyone laughing and saying all sorts of strange, yet inexplicably fitting, "signatures" of themselves.
"Where is the president?"
President Chen Niansha, who had been smiling and shaking her head, was immediately ignited by these words, her environmental spirit ignited. She cleared her throat and adopted a leader's demeanor:
"I hope that, in addition to the personal identification badges, each of us can also have a uniform environmental recycling symbol on our butts!"
Her gaze swept over the team members, and her tone became more serious: "Joking aside, seriously, everyone, please collect all your own food wrappers, fruit pits, and so on after you finish eating! Everything we brought must be taken down the mountain! Cuiyun Peak is so beautiful, we can't leave a single piece of trash behind, understand?"
"Got it, President!" Everyone responded, albeit in different ways, but all very enthusiastically.
"Don't worry, boss, all the trash has been collected!" A team member shook the sealed bag in his hand.
"Exactly! Whoever litters will have a mountain of trash growing on their butt!"
A mountain breeze suddenly swept by, bringing coolness and an indescribable, subtle scent.
A man, let's call him A, sitting downwind, suddenly sniffed, his brows furrowing instantly. He instinctively pinched his nose and mumbled:
"Holy crap! Who? Who farted or pooped?! This smell... it's a bit pungent!"
The laughter of the crowd stopped abruptly as they subconsciously took a deep breath to discern the situation. Several people's expressions then became subtle, and they glanced suspiciously to their left and right.
Yu You hurriedly wrapped the durian candy that had fallen on the ground in paper, trying to explain, "It's not a fart! It's candy! It's just a durian candy that fell on the ground!"
Upon seeing this, the man A, who had been sitting downwind, immediately released his nose and slapped his thigh hard.
"When it comes to poop, I get an idea! Those trash-littering bastards, what right do they have to wear any proper badges on their butts? They don't deserve them! Anyone who dares to litter doesn't have an environmental badge on their butt!"
He paused, looked around, and seemed to be conjuring up a brilliant metaphor.
"That must be a lump of old excrement that's been dried and cracked by the sun, then soaked by dew, repeatedly scorched, and still has undigested corn kernels on it! When the wind blows, it crumbles and falls apart, attracting flies!"
Everyone: "???"
After a moment of silence, an even louder burst of laughter and retching erupted.
"Aaaaaah, not a buddy? How disgusting!" someone threw their water glass at him.
"Damn it! Stop talking! I'm eating a sausage!"
Another beta player, who was gnawing on a corn sausage, let out a scream. Looking at the pink sausage with corn kernels in his hand, his expression instantly twisted. He didn't know whether to eat it or throw it away.
Li Yuheng, who had been watching the show from the sidelines, raised an eyebrow, ready to join in.
Shu Bai reacted swiftly, covering Li Yuheng's mouth and forcibly silencing the shocking words that were about to spill from his lips.
Li Yuheng: "Mmm! Mmm!"
(Translation: Let me tell you! I have a brilliant analogy!)
Shu Bai covered herself even tighter: "No, you don't want to."
Li Yuheng: "Mmm! Mmm!"
(Translation: No! Let me tell you! I promise it'll be even better than his!)
Seeing that Li Yuheng was struggling more and more fiercely, his eyes were flashing with a light that was determined to make a name for himself.
Shu Bai steeled her resolve, suddenly leaned close to his ear, and whispered rapidly in a breathy voice, her tone filled with an unprecedented determination:
"If you dare utter a single word, you can forget about ever kissing me again. Not even once. I mean it. Your 'most handsome face in the universe' will permanently lose the right to come within ten centimeters of my lips."
Li Yuheng: "!!!"
His eyes, which were always brimming with mockery and gleam, suddenly widened, clearly displaying: [What a vicious curse!]
The struggle stopped instantly.
The price is too high!
It was so big that even his heart, that of the prince of the underworld, couldn't bear it!
Li Yuheng immediately raised his hand and made a zipping motion over his mouth, nodding frantically.
Shu Bai finally let go.
Li Yuheng glanced at Shu Bai with a mournful look and muttered under his breath, "...That's too cruel, little Shu Bai, you're practically stifling artistic creation..."
"Um?"
"…nothing."
Li Yuheng sat upright, his hands obediently placed on his knees, but his eyes were still darting around unwillingly.
Clearly, he was still engaged in some kind of intense artistic conception about old, unspoken excrement in his mind.
On the other hand, when they talk about poop and pee, they get so engrossed in it that they forget everything else and become completely absorbed, oblivious to the world around them.
"Speaking of aged excrement! It has to have layers, like a mille-feuille cake! The top layer is the crust that dung beetles love, crisp and cracked from sun-drying, crunchy and crunchy! The middle layer is a semi-dry, sticky, and stringy rich filling! The bottom layer is the texture of a soft-boiled egg, soaked in the essence of the earth and absorbing the cycle of the sun and moon! One poke! Plop—!"
"Yue—!!!"
At least three people gagged.
The beta player who was munching on a corn sausage turned green with shock, his hands trembling as he cried out, "Who...who will pay for my sausage?!"
"I really can't win!"
Even a normally quiet omega girl spoke up:
"From the perspective of fluid dynamics and evaporation efficiency, in order to form such a standard 'thousand-layer' structure, the initial viscosity of the excrement, the ambient humidity, the solar radiation intensity, and the surface permeability must reach a delicate balance."
Furthermore, during the curing process, it likely underwent at least three cycles of being moistened by night dew and exposed to direct sunlight during the day to produce this unique texture—crisp yet chewy, chewy yet soft—...or rather, its appearance.
Everyone: "..."
A deathly silence fell around the campfire.
The only sounds were the crackling of the flames and the rustling of Yu You trying to quietly tear open the packaging of another durian candy.
A few seconds later.
"Holy crap!! A genius!!" a teammate exclaimed, breaking the silence. "You actually used 'texture' to describe it?! You even analyzed the 'texture'?!"
The quiet, shy, and introverted young woman blushed and quickly lowered her head: "It was just a slip of the tongue."
Another man, A, suddenly stood up, spreading his arms as if embracing the wind of the entire mountain wilderness. He took a deep breath, his expression one of ecstasy and wild abandon.
"You lot! Your vision is too narrow! Why are you only focused on that tiny patch of shit?! Where's the fart?! Where's the piss?! Where's that vast, unrestrained, primal, surging power of life?!"
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