Mother
Since that day's deep talk with her mother, Ning Lingyi has completely calmed down.
Every day, she was either accompanied by palace servants to the royal temple outside the capital to burn incense and worship Buddha, praying for "the emperor's good health and the prosperity of the country", or she stayed in Xuehan Palace, following Concubine Yu and the palace embroiderers, doing needlework stitch by stitch.
That day, she was sewing the collar of the lining of a casual dress with her head down, using extremely fine silver thread and embroidering continuous cloud patterns.
The sunlight filtered through the window lattice onto her focused profile. Her long eyelashes cast a small shadow under her eyes, and her posture was as gentle as any ordinary daughter who was about to get married and was trying hard to be filial.
"Your Majesty has been busy lately, and I heard that he often coughs at night. This lining is made of the soft cotton newly imported from Jiangnan. It is close-fitting and breathable. The collar is embroidered more densely, perhaps it can block some cold wind." She handed the work in her hand to Concubine Yu to see, her voice soft.
"My daughter will be traveling far away in the future and will no longer be able to serve you medicine by your bedside. I only hope that this small token of my gratitude will make your father think of me when he wears it..."
Naturally, some palace servants, intentionally or unintentionally, heard about her behavior and told it to Emperor Xuanxi.
The news also reached Prince Yong's Mansion.
Prince Yong Ning Lingjue listened to the report from his trusted eunuch, sneered, and casually dropped a black jade chess piece on the chessboard. Sitting opposite him was his sister, Princess Changning Ning Lingli, who was born to the same mother.
"Look, our imperial sister Mingzhu is really a wonderful person." Prince Yong was only about twenty years old, with a handsome face, but there was a sinister look between his eyebrows.
"The mother and daughter's play of retreat in order to advance was truly heartfelt. They simply wanted to evoke the emperor's pity and guilt."
Ning Lingli's brows were filled with worry. He put down the white piece in his hand and whispered, "Brother Wang, will the emperor really soften his heart and change his mind and let someone else go..."
"Absolutely impossible." Prince Yong shook his head decisively, his fingertips stroking the warm chess piece. "There are only three princesses of marriageable age in the entire palace. Zhaoyang, the Crown Prince's daughter, is a legitimate darling. The Empress is obsessed with her, so how could she let her go? You and I... Our mother passed away early, and our father felt guilty about us, so he's been quite lenient with us all these years."
"That day, the Crown Prince and I teamed up and sang the same tune to bring the honor of Beishuo's marriage to Ning Lingyi. Although my father was reluctant, he had no choice after weighing the pros and cons. Now that the imperial edict has been issued, how can it be a joke? No matter how distressed my father is, she is determined to drink this bitter cup." He had his own thoughts.
Ning Lingli felt a little relieved after hearing this, but then she became puzzled and asked, "If that's the case, what's the point of her pretending like this?"
"It's just a last-ditch effort." Prince Yong's tone was indifferent, as if he was discussing a trivial matter that had nothing to do with him. "It's nothing more than trying to get more benefits before leaving, or to make her mother's life in the palace easier. It's just a small fight, it won't amount to anything, so don't pay any attention to it."
*
Inside the Xuehan Palace, candlelight flickered.
Ning Lingyi put down the half-embroidered piece of fabric, rubbed her sore eyes, and stared at the flickering lanterns. She was silent for a long time, but she couldn't help herself. A wave of frustration welled up in her heart, and she grumbled softly, "It was clearly him... He was the one who gave me up, and now we have to go to great lengths to please him, relying on his pity to survive... Is there any justice in this world?"
Concubine Yu was sorting silk threads. Upon hearing this, she paused and looked up at her daughter.
She put down her work, walked over to Ning Lingyi, and gently pulled her into her arms. Just like when they were little, she patted her on the back and said, "Silly child, this is the Imperial Palace, one of the most unreasonable places in the world. There's no point in being reasonable when it comes to women here."
Ning Lingyi buried her face in her mother's clothes, which carried a faint, cold fragrance. Her voice was muffled, yet it carried a hint of stubbornness that refused to yield: "Even if it has been like this since ancient times, even if all women in the world have lived this way...I, your daughter, will not acknowledge you! Why?"
She raised her head, looked at her mother, and said, "Now I'm weak, there's nothing I can do, I have to bow my head. But in the future, if I want to have a future, I must find a way to change this situation! Let my daughter be able to make her own decisions!"
Concubine Yu looked at the light in her daughter's eyes, feeling both sad and relieved.
She stroked her daughter's long, smooth hair and whispered, "I'm very happy that Yi'er has this determination. But right now, you have to bow your head. I don't ask you to turn the world upside down in the future, but I only hope that no matter what situation you find yourself in, you will never give up the idea of saving yourself. Even if the road ahead seems dark, you must grit your teeth, try again, and fight for it again."
“Just like us today.”
Ning Lingyi hugged her mother tightly back. At this moment, only her mother's arms made her feel safe. She said, "Don't worry, mother. I will definitely do it."
The mother and daughter said no more, but continued with their needlework under the dim light.
Stitch by stitch, thread by thread, what is sewn in is helplessness and forbearance. Days pass one by one in this seemingly calm and repressive atmosphere.
The clothes, shoes and socks they made were occasionally sent to Emperor Xuanxi through the eunuchs.
The emperor looked at the work with fine stitches and listened to the eunuchs reporting back on how the princess worked late into the night and how she prayed devoutly before the Buddha. He fell silent more and more often, and his sighs towards the Xuehan Palace became longer and longer.
Finally, on an autumn afternoon, the emperor's edict arrived at Xuehan Palace.
The eunuch's voice echoed through the silent palace, announcing the decree: "Your Majesty, Consort Yu, is gentle and kind, virtuous, well-educated, and deeply understanding of righteousness. I grant you the title of "Gui Shun" and reward you with ten hu of East China Sea pearls, one hundred pieces of Shu brocade, and two sets of red gold headgear."
"Princess Mingzhu Ning Lingyi is both filial and righteous. She is a good wife and mother, considerate of her father and her ruler, and shares the country's worries. I am deeply pleased and am here to increase her fiefdom and grant her five thousand taels of gold to honor her virtue."
After the eunuch finished reading it, he handed the imperial edict respectfully to Concubine Yu with a smile on his face, and directed the young eunuchs to carry the rewards into the hall one by one.
The brilliance of pearls, the splendor of Shu brocade, and the dazzling of red gold add a touch of superficial warmth to this usually cold palace.
After the eunuchs left, Ning Lingyi held the bright yellow imperial edict in her hand. She looked at the rewards scattered throughout the hall, her face showing no joy. Instead, she turned to Noble Consort Yu with a hint of confusion, "Mother, what does Father mean by this?"
Concubine Yu looked at her daughter and said, "Silly girl, don't you understand?"
"This is to tell you, and to tell everyone, that as a father, he feels guilty. He cannot change his decision about the marriage, so he can only use these pearls, jade, brocade, gold, silver, and land to compensate you and appease himself."
"Compensation..." Ning Lingyi murmured these two words.
Ning Lingyi's eyes slowly swept across the rewards in the hall.
The round and radiant pearls of the East China Sea, the shimmering Shu brocade, the dazzling red gold headgear, and the words on the light imperial edict: "Add ten thousand households to the fiefdom" and "Give five thousand taels of gold"...
If she had received such a generous reward in the past, she might have been overjoyed and proud, and would have felt that her father loved her the most after all.
But at this moment, these luxurious things only made her feel ironic.
She turned her head and looked at her mother beside her.
Concubine Yu was looking at her with a hint of expectation in her eyes that was not completely concealed, as if she wanted to find a little comfort from her daughter's face.
Ning Lingyi's heart felt like it was being tugged at by something, making it feel sour and bitter.
She said softly, "Mother, I used to think that my father doted on me the most. He would reward me with many good things, making me prouder than all my brothers and sisters."
She paused, a thin layer of tears appeared in her eyes, but she stubbornly refused to let it fall.
"But mother, I was wrong."
Concubine Yu was stunned and looked at her daughter in confusion.
Ning Lingyi held her mother's slightly cold hand and said, "The person who loves me the most in this world is you."
Concubine Yu trembled all over. She opened her mouth and wanted to say something, but no word came out. She just stared at her daughter blankly, with emotions surging in her eyes, including incredible joy and overwhelming sadness.
"My father may be the Son of Heaven, rich and powerful," Ning Lingyi said, her voice slightly choked, "but all he can give me are these material possessions. He could even easily give me up when weighing the pros and cons."
"But you, mother, are different. I'm your only love. You've always been considerate of me, accompanying me in every play, sewing for me, and fighting for my uncertain future..."
"Mother, you love me so much, but I have never given you anything..."
"Yier..." Concubine Yu could no longer hold back. The worry, fear, and resentment that had been pent up for too long suddenly burst forth at this moment.
She hugged her daughter tightly in her arms and burst into tears.
"It's my fault that I'm useless. It's my fault that I can't keep you here..." She burst into tears and spoke incoherently, "I made you go so far away and suffer so much. I'm so sorry for you, so sorry..."
Ning Lingyi also hugged her mother's thin and trembling body tightly, and her tears rolled down, soaking her mother's shoulders.
"No, mother, you have done a lot for me, so much..."
She knew the voices of gossip going on behind her back, both inside and outside the palace.
They said that Ning Lingyi was not a prince, but just a useless princess. If she were a prince, given Concubine Yu's continued favor over the years, she might be able to compete for the throne and help her mother become the empress dowager in the future.
Yes, everyone else treated her as useless, a pawn that could be sacrificed at any time.
Only her mother truly loved her and never regarded her as useless.
When she said she wanted to learn horse riding, her mother tried every means to find the best riding and archery instructor for her. She also carefully looked for an opportunity to ask her father for the Arabian horses that were tributed from the Western Regions.
She naturally disliked being bound and hated the cumbersome palace rules, so her mother protected her well. From childhood to adulthood, she hardly let any troubles really bother her and silently shielded her from all storms.
Even though the ancestral system stipulated that princesses were not eligible for fiefdoms, her mother still put in a lot of effort and maneuvered for many years to finally secure for her a fiefdom of the same standard as that of a prince.
My father has three palaces and six courtyards and many children.
His fatherly love can be divided and weighed.
But she is the only mother left.
The palace is quiet and people's hearts are cold. Only the mother's arms are real, warm, and belong to her without reservation.
The mother and daughter hugged each other and cried. The luxurious rewards in the hall were eclipsed. Only the family love that supported each other in times of trouble was the glimmer of hope that supported them to keep going in the cold autumn.
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