Chapter 90 Reminiscence: Let me take you to see my past with her. ...
Yuanfang rested his head on his elbow on the table, his eyes filled with a bright expectation.
Do you like it?
The colorful pastries were on display, and Yuanfang kept opening one box after another, until they piled up into a small mountain.
Le Jin picked up a piece of each and took a bite, looking as happy as a little mouse that had fallen into a rice jar, nodding frantically at him.
She thought the Meng family's preserved fruits and the pastries from Juede Winery were the best things she could eat, but it turned out there were always better things out there. The sweet pastries helped her forget all her gloom.
Yuanfang smiled, his thick, doe-like eyelashes fluttering down as he looked at the pastries and said, "These are all from my mother, Consort Wen's palace..."
Qing Si really liked the things his mother gave him; that alone was enough to make Yuan Fang happy for a whole day.
But these words took on a different meaning in Le Jin's ears. She picked the crumbs of pastry from the corner of her mouth and put them in her mouth, smacked her lips, and asked, "Does Consort Wen...love you?"
If this mother were a peony in the imperial garden, her emotions reserved only for the emperor, then Yue Jin would be at ease. Without emotional entanglements, their journey would be smooth; but if she were merely a mother, then things would be much more complicated…
Le Jin silently chewed on Consort Wen's pastries, secretly hoping that she would be a little mean and cold-hearted, pushing Yuan Fang away and bringing him to her side.
Suddenly, her throat tightened, as if she had swallowed a stone in shock. Le Jin's eyes widened slightly, unable to believe that she had such a dark thought.
The thought was very unfamiliar yet real; it landed and took root in my heart.
Yuan Fangsui gave a soft "hmm" in response to Le Jin's question. But Le Jin's head gradually sank lower and lower, as if avoiding Yuan Fangsui's eyes.
"However, I always feel strange around her."
Yuan Fang's tone immediately became troubled, "I can't help but think, if she really loves me, why did she send me away for more than ten years? But if she doesn't love me, why does she often cry after seeing me?"
“Qing Si,” he called her softly, a cold sorrow welling up in his eyes: “My only kinship with my father and mother was during those ten years of my childhood. Whether or not everyone is willing to admit it, I have had no parents since I was ten years old.”
It's said that blood is thicker than water, and kinship cannot be severed, as if blood ties are like the will of heaven, their majesty inviolable. But the grander something is, the less it can withstand scrutiny. At least during the two days Yuanfang spent with Jian Dan's father and mother, he felt not warmth but awkwardness and unease.
He had never uttered a word of these words to his father and mother, keeping them bottled up in his heart for countless years, only able to speak them freely in front of Qing Si.
Half a hazelnut pastry was held between Le Jin's fingers, and several pieces of the flaky pastry fell off, like frost falling from a mottled, dim moon.
Yuanfang wasn't one to feel down easily; even if he threw a tantrum, he wouldn't be "sad." But fortunately, Lejin was familiar with such low moments.
There used to be several left-behind children in their neighborhood. They missed their parents every day when they couldn't see them, but felt awkward and unfamiliar when they did see them. Perhaps the parents they missed weren't the real people they were thinking of.
She quickly fed the hazelnut snack to Yuan Fang Sui, practically stuffing it into his mouth, and his cheeks immediately bulged out as he chewed.
Le Jin clapped her hands with a smile, exuding the heroic spirit of a wandering swordsman: "Life is your own. Live it if you're happy, and leave if you're not. It's okay if you don't look back."
The crisp, oily hazelnuts crackled and popped between his teeth, instantly captivating his taste buds. But Yuanfang couldn't quite tell whether he was captivated by the snacks or by the green rhinoceros; in any case, his tongue felt numb, and his eyes felt a slight urge to tear up.
But crying in front of Qing Si would be too undignified! So Yuan Fang chose to smile at her instead.
——
The afternoon autumn sun was soft and gentle, shining through the artificial rocks in the small garden and turning into irregular beams of light that trailed long, golden tails, landing on Lejin's lap under the eaves.
On her lap was a small round bamboo tray filled with three or four kinds of chrysanthemums, arranged neatly by color, taking up half of the tray. The other half held some fabric, needles and thread, and small scissors.
Le Jin disliked owing people anything, and after eating the pastries Yuan Fang had given her, she thought of making a sachet to give to him. As she was picking flower petals with her head down, a familiar yet startling voice suddenly came from behind her.
"Miss Qing Si can also make sachets?"
Le Jin picked up the bamboo tray, stood up abruptly, and turned around, causing a few light purple chrysanthemum petals to fall to the ground.
"You flatter me, Second Master. I was just doing it for fun."
Meng Cizhang stood in front of her with his hands behind his back, a smile on his face, but it was very faint, as if he was looking at Le Jin through that smile.
Le Jin kept her eyes downcast and her mind at ease. "My lord has come to see Xuan Shengzi?"
Meng Cizhang nodded. "We need to find him, but we also need to find you."
His smile deepened, and the corners of his mouth curved into a beautiful arc. He had only one eye, but it was exceptionally bright, as if a cluster of fireworks was blooming in his eye.
"Is Miss Qing Si engaged?"
Le Jin blinked blankly, completely unable to guess why Meng Cizhang would ask her this question. After a pause, she honestly shook her head.
That's good.
Meng Cizhang seemed unwilling to say anything more and turned to find Yuan Fangsui.
Before long, Yuanfang casually led Sheng Er and Sheng San to follow Meng Cizhang elsewhere. When he left, he specifically instructed Sheng Yi to stay and keep Le Jin company.
"What does the Second Young Master Meng want with him? Why don't you go?"
Sheng Yi squatted down at Le Jin's feet to pick up the petals that had just fallen, blew on them in his palm, and then put them back into Le Jin's small bamboo bag.
"Weren't we here to hold a prayer ceremony for the Meng family? The Second Young Master said there's no better time than today, so we've prepared everything and are just waiting for Xuan Shengzi to arrive."
"As for me..." he drawled, leaning closer to Le Jin and gently nudging her arm. He whispered to her, "Xuan Shengzi doesn't want to come back and see you crying again, so he asked me to protect you."
He was handsome, with his eyebrows raised high, looking quite dashing. Looking at him, Le Jin was reminded of Yuan Fang's exaggerated and dramatic instructions to him to watch over her, and she burst out laughing.
However, Yuanfang was not in a good mood.
Meng Cizhang led him to Zhenyuan Garden, but there was clearly no incense altar set up in Zhenyuan Garden. Only Meng Shutai sat alone under the shade of the trees, pouring a pot of tea.
He turned to stare at Meng Cizhang, a hint of mocked anger in his eyes. "What is this?"
Meng Cizhang had figured out this man's temperament early on, so he spoke kindly and comforted him with a smile: "To tell you the truth, since Xuan Shengzi entered the manor, my brother's illness has suddenly improved. I suppose it is thanks to the True Man that we no longer need to trouble Xuan Shengzi to chant scriptures and set up an altar. Today, my brother asked me to invite Xuan Shengzi over because he wanted to express his gratitude."
Yuanfang glanced at the young man before her, who was displaying his remarkable eloquence, and couldn't help but sneer.
Why beat around the bush when asking someone to come up with a question? There's clearly something fishy going on.
He crossed his arms, his smile even more fake than a puppet mask, and sat down directly in front of Meng Shutai.
"Young master, please speak frankly. We Daoists have no taboos."
A cup of tea was pushed over by a slender, jade-like hand, causing a slight ripple.
"Xuan Shengzi has a fine demeanor; he is indeed unlike the corrupt people in the world of fame and fortune in Luoyang."
Meng Shutai was dressed in purple robes, with gold patterns wrapped around the collar and cuffs, looking mysterious and noble, even more like an ancient immortal from another world than Yuan Fangsui.
"In that case, please forgive my rudeness." Meng Shutai tilted her head slightly and nodded, her posture as graceful as a crane, which aroused Yuan Fang's curiosity about what such a wealthy and beautiful woman was going to do that had anything to do with him.
"Shutai wants to marry the girl Qingsi."
"You've gone too far with your rudeness."
The two sat across a small, grey stone table. One pair of phoenix eyes held a leisurely smile, while the other flashed with anger. In that moment of silence, the atmosphere was tense and fraught with danger.
Yuanfang stared hatefully at the person in front of him, when suddenly he caught a whiff of a scent.
sandalwood.
When he entered the room, he saw Qing Si throw his pillow on the ground. Before he could pick it up and ask Qing Si anything, he smelled a sandalwood scent on the pillow.
Qing Si rushed over in a panic, snatched the pillow and clutched it to her chest, saying that she had accidentally spilled the spices on his pillow and was about to throw it away when she met him.
But... she knew he never used perfume and didn't like people around him to use it either, so how could she have brought perfume into the house and left it on his pillow?
That's strange.
Remembering how Qing Si rushed over from the room crying to hug him as soon as he returned, looking so pitiful and aggrieved... Yuan Fang's brow twitched, and he jumped up from the stone bench, leaped over the small stone table, grabbed Meng Shutai's collar, and yanked hard.
"What did you do to Qing Si?!"
He roared furiously, his neck bulging and his eyes turning bloodshot.
Just as Meng Cizhang was about to step forward to stop them, Sheng Er and Sheng San blocked his way, staring at him angrily.
Meng Shutai chuckled softly and patted Yuan Fangsui's hand. "Calm down."
"I didn't do anything. You can go back and ask her if you don't believe me."
Meng Shutai's eyes and brows were full of disdain, and even when he was being grabbed by the collar, he remained calm and composed, which made Yuan Fang seem crude and reckless.
Yuanfang scoffed and forcefully flung Meng Shutai away, the force so great that Meng Shutai almost fell off the stool.
With her hands braced on the table to steady herself, Meng Shu still smiled gently on the table.
"Does Xuan Shengzi know where she came from? Where are her family now? Where did she go in the past? If Shutai guesses correctly, you should know nothing about her."
What is he doing? Is he trying to show off how well he knows Qing Si? Yuan Fang was about to retort, but then realized that what this person said was true.
He truly knew nothing about Qing Si's past.
Meng Shutai straightened his clothes, which had been crumpled by Yuan Fangsui, and continued, "Xuan Shengzi is very angry that I have designs on her, isn't she?"
"But if you knew what she did to me in the past, you'd be even angrier, wouldn't you?"
He suddenly looked up, staring at Yuan Fangsui like a wolf. His cold gaze seemed to gleam with a ghostly green, and Yuan Fangsui momentarily forgot to breathe.
Meng Shutai stood up, grabbed Yuan Fangsui's wrist, and squeezed it so hard that his bones felt like they were about to crack.
"I'll take you to see what my past with her was like."
"Did I say I wanted to see it? Hey! Let go of me!"
Ignoring Yuan Fang's struggles, Meng Shutai forcefully dragged him into his and Le Jin's bedroom, pointing out each corner to him.
"Before this dressing table, I removed her wedding crown for her, vowing that after our marriage, I would follow her wishes above all else."
"I entrusted my personal seal to this small couch."
"This chaise lounge was where we first became intimate; I still remember the way her skin trembled and the feel of it."
"This bed..."
Meng Shutai knew every object engraved with his and Le Jin's past as if it were his own treasure, his eyes burning with an almost manic intensity as he gazed at them.
But when he faced this familiar bed, he felt as if he were in a long dream, a dream that seemed to have no end.
"Beside this bed, she once styled my long hair while I took my medicine, and listened to me tell stories about the kittens I had as a child;"
"It was here that I tied the red string that husband and wife exchange; I rode back at night to see her once, just once, and two horses died from exhaustion; we slept side by side, almost ready to live and die together..."
Meng Shutai suddenly changed the subject, like a cold knife suddenly thrust out from a tender, lingering memory:
"But do you know how she treated me!?"
He turned around abruptly and gripped Yuan Fangsui's shoulders tightly. His eyes held a contemptuous smile of resentment, but Yuan Fangsui clearly saw the surging malice beneath that smile.
Like a monstrous demon.
"Do you know how wanton and unrestrained Qing Si, whom you spend every day with, used to be?"
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Author's Note: Here I am!
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