Professor Wu continued, "Don't you still trust your own heart? You drew your husband, and after you drew it and scribbled on it, it shows that you are really confused inside."
Jin Xue was silent and turned her gaze to the sand painting.
Professor Wu looked at Jin Xue and directly addressed her instinctive reaction, "You love your husband, but you don't feel safe, so you waver. What frustrates you most is that you can't reach a consensus. The child's doll in the sand painting tray was pushed to the ground, and that's what broke your defenses."
Jin Xue nodded, her almond-shaped eyes drooping slightly, her tone much calmer, and she opened her heart to Professor Wu for the first time, "Ever since I married him, his family has been constantly pressuring me to have children, forcing me to take Chinese medicine, and even creating some conflicts. I'm very disgusted.
Later, from his words, I judged that he didn't like children and didn't want me to have one. Coincidentally, I didn't want to have one either and wanted a divorce, so we reached a tacit understanding.
If life had continued like this, it wouldn't have mattered, but a quiet life became a luxury. Then, one despicable thing after another, I kept learning that he had a fiancée whom he loved deeply, and they had an unborn child.
They loved the child very much and made many preparations to welcome the child, but unfortunately the person he loved and the child had a tragic fate. So, over time, I also felt that it was not that he didn't like children, but he just didn't like our child.
It doesn’t matter that we don’t have children. I never thought I would be with him for a long time, so I don’t care. It seems that being together is not bad, and I feel happy.
Until one day, I accidentally used his fiancée's violin, and I saw that he was very emotional. Then I understood that it had always been a life of three people. "
After a pause, Jin Xue blinked, trying to dispel the tears in her eyes, "That was just my assumption. What happened later, including my testing of him, clearly told me that, in fact, we were four people living together.
Even though that child never had the chance to come into this world, he always had her in his heart. He couldn't have room for another child. I didn't know how to live with four of us, so I didn't want to continue. I wanted to end it.
Once, he and I were at the hospital entrance when a car approached us and nearly hit me. He struggled to save me, and his expression of fear confirmed that he was experiencing a traumatic episode of post-traumatic stress disorder. Therefore, I suspected that he had a mental problem.
Later, there were arguments and conflicts that left me feeling really exhausted. Yes, I couldn't afford to lose, and I was afraid, but I also had the right to end it. I am who I am, and I don't want to always give in, nor do I want to always have to endure it. It wouldn't be fair to me.
Professor Wu nodded slightly, his sharp eyes still fixed on Jin Xue, releasing a meticulous observation, "You should know that these are his symptoms, which he cannot control, and this is not the real him.
Knowing that his late fiancée was affecting his emotions, you should have advised him to see a psychiatrist. Your inner depression stems from his symptoms, so you should also seek psychological counseling and understand his true inner feelings.
Psychological or spiritual treatment requires cooperation, as well as the care and support of those around you. As you know, it is not a problem that can be solved by just a few classes.
He can't get better, and you're struggling too. Your relationship is mutually reinforcing, so why not let go of yourself?"
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