Chapter 418 My heart is filled with cotton
The early morning sunlight was like melted gold, shattering into thousands of points of light as it flowed across the lake.
Xunxun knelt on the doormat in the entrance hall, the ears of the teddy bear doll were wrinkled from being squeezed by him. The five-year-old boy was full of energy, and the heels of his sneakers made a light sound on the floor.
"Dad, Mom said Little Swan will bow to me, right? Aunt Han taught me how to bow!"
Qi Moxun squatted down to tie his shoelaces, and his fingertips rubbed the small red mark on the child's ankle.
I got that scratch when I ran too fast on the lawn yesterday.
He still felt a little distressed.
I couldn't help but rub it gently.
"Yes, but you have to stand steady when you bow, or you'll fall into the lake like a little penguin."
His Adam's apple rolled slightly as he spoke, his eyes swept across the dressing mirror at the entrance, where he saw Shen Hanxing helping Han Lingcui adjust the straps of his sun hat.
They look like good friends.
Han Lingcui was wearing a beige dress today with tiny pearls embroidered on the collar. She bought it specially for her when Xunxun said last time, "Auntie would look so beautiful in it."
But at this moment, those pearls were like tears on a pale neck. She looked at the dark circles under her eyes in the mirror.
I hardly slept last night. In the drawer of the bedside table lay the paternity test report that had been hidden for five years. The edges of the paper were made hairy by my fingertips.
"Auntie, your box!"
Xunxun suddenly rushed over, bumping her little head on her knees, and pointed at the plastic container in her hand, "Are the carrots cut into little stars?"
Han Lingcui staggered and held the child's shoulders, his fingertips digging into his soft clothes.
During this period, these hands have bathed Xunxun countless times, tied his crooked shoelaces, and even stayed up all night to cool him down physically when he had a fever.
In the future, perhaps there will be no such space for us to get along with each other.
I can't help feeling sad.
“It’s in the shape of a star.”
She heard her own voice trembling, and quickly turned and walked out the door. The sunlight fell on her back but did not warm it, it was like she was covered in a thin layer of ice.
The wooden planks of the lakeside boardwalk were still wet with the night dew. Xunxun took off his shoes and stepped on them barefoot. The cool touch made him giggle, and he rushed towards the group of swans holding the bread crumbs.
Qi Moxun followed behind with big strides, his outstretched hand always kept half a step away from the child. Shen Hanxing stood there watching with a gentle smile on his face.
"He never took off his shoes in public before."
Chen Hanxing's voice was very soft, and the misty wind carried her words towards Han Lingcui, "You always say that there are scars on the soles of your feet, because you're afraid that others will laugh at you."
Han Lingcui clenched the food storage box tightly, and the diced carrots in the box made a small crunching sound.
The scar was caused by burns when Xunxun was one year old. It was said that it was because his previous adoptive mother was busy with work and his adoptive father deliberately didn't want to care about him. He knocked over the kettle and his little feet swelled up like a carrot.
Later, scars were left.
Xunxun didn't feel much sadness when he talked about this past. After all, he had now forgotten the pain and could look forward.
But Han Lingcui still felt that she was absent from Xunxun's life, and her eyes were red.
"Auntie, look!" Xunxun came running back holding a gray feather, with grass debris on the tip of her nose. "The little swan gave me this gift!"
Han Lingcui's knees felt weak when she squatted down. She carefully picked up the feather, the feather shaft still had the residual warmth of the swan's body temperature.
The baby's breath smelled of milk and sunshine on her cheek.
This was the scene she had dreamed of countless nights, but when the dream came true, she felt like an intruder, and even the hug was filled with stolen panic.
"Xunxun, run slower! Daddy can't catch up with you!"
Qi Moxun's laughter came from a distance. He deliberately slowed down to let the child go ahead. The sunlight overlapped the shadows of the two people, like an elongated oil painting.
Han Lingcui's throat felt tight as if it were stuffed with cotton. She lowered her head and pretended to adjust the child's collar, her fingertips rubbing against the baby's hair on the back of the neck.
There was a faint swirl there, exactly like hers.
When we sat down by the window in the lakeside restaurant at noon, Xunxun insisted on sitting next to Han Lingcui.
The children's chair was too high, and his short legs dangled back and forth. The crayon painted large patches of blue on the drawing paper, and he said it was the water of Swan Lake.
Qi Moxun leaned over to take a look, and was pulled by the father's arm to be asked to draw a small fish. The father and son whispered to each other. Han Lingcui looked at their crossed arms and suddenly felt the glass in front of him getting hot.
"Lingcui, try this cream of mushroom soup."
Chen Hanxing pushed the soup bowl in front of her, and the warmth of the edge of the porcelain bowl came through her fingertips, "Xunxun said that you would put mushrooms in the soup you made. This tastes very similar."
Han Lingcui scooped up a spoonful of soup, and the heat blurred his vision.
She does always put shiitake mushrooms in her soup because Xunxun said they "looked like bear ears" when she first ate them.
But Shen Hanxing remembered it so clearly that he even ordered a similar flavor.
This discovery made her feel stuffy in her chest, as if someone had blocked her mouth and nose with cotton.
"Look, Mom!"
Xunxun ran over holding a piece of drawing paper. On the paper, four crooked little people were holding hands. The long-haired little person on the far right was painted off-white. "This is Aunt Han! We're dancing next to Swan Lake!"
Han Lingcui's eyelashes were suddenly burned by something. She turned her face away to wipe the corner of her mouth, but her fingertips touched something wet.
It turned out that the child knew everything. He remembered the color of her skirt and that she was always watching from the side, but he called her "Auntie" and Shen Hanxing "Mom".
She still couldn't help feeling sad.
"What a great drawing." Qi Moxun took the drawing paper and gently tapped the off-white figure with his fingertips. "Xunxun drew Aunt Lingcui so beautifully."
"Because Auntie is beautiful!" Xunxun lay on Han Lingcui's lap, her little chin resting on the back of her hand, "Just like the princess in Swan Lake!"
The weight of the child pressed against his wrist, making it feel unsettlingly warm.
Han Lingcui looked at the swans flying by outside the window and suddenly wanted to ask them: Do domesticated swans still remember their nests? Just like Xunxun, who was loved by Chen Hanxing and Qi Moxun, would she still remember her biological mother?
When they went to the lawn to fly a kite that afternoon, the wind suddenly picked up. Qi Moxun ran, holding the kite string, and Xunxun chased after him, his short legs tumbling as fast as a whirlwind, his laughter like silver bells scattered by the wind.
Chen Hanxing sat on a picnic mat cutting strawberries. The sunlight shone through the gaps in the trees onto the tips of her hair. Han Lingcui looked at the golden light and suddenly felt breathless.
"I'm going to buy a bottle of water." Her knees were shaking as she stood up. The moment she picked up her bag, the metal zipper hit the business card hidden inside. She hurriedly covered it and left immediately.
There is a large patch of hydrangeas planted at the corner of the boulevard, and the lavender petals rustle in the wind.
Just as Han Lingcui reached the edge of the flowers, a hand suddenly reached out from behind a tree and covered her mouth with such force that it almost crushed her cheekbone.
She struggled to look back and saw a man wearing a baseball cap with the brim pulled down so low that only the scar on his chin could be seen.
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