Chapter 52
I don't have any particular hobbies; when I'm bored, I just want to sleep.
Upon closer examination, my habit of seizing every opportunity to sleep is most likely a result of the grueling training I underwent with the Zoldyck family.
Running laps, dodging projectiles, and practicing combat skills were all fine. But after my daily training, as my physical fitness improved, Milluki started adding some extra, nasty activities to my training regimen. The most typical of these was attempting to assassinate me while I slept—
"This is to train your vigilance!" Milluki said. "A true assassin, even when exhausted, will never truly let their guard down!"
I couldn't help but cry out, "I'm not a real killer—"
He ignored me and insisted on adding this training program.
I was angry, but there was nothing I could do.
Looking back now, no wonder there isn't a single normal person in the Zoldyck family... constantly having their sleep disturbed like this, and having to worry about how to defend against attacks from who-knows-where while trying to sleep... it's no wonder they suffer from neurasthenia.
Milluki's training had a brief but effective period of time. When he thought he had succeeded and stopped the training... I forgot all the instincts I had developed during this training in less than a year.
Simply put, once I fall asleep, unlike the Zoldyck family, I can let my guard down and sleep soundly.
...I'm not an assassin, and I don't value life as much as they do, so it doesn't matter to me.
Life is already so hard, why squeeze out your sleep time?
After waking up, I took a while to calm down and realized that this was the third day since I left the Phantom Troupe and spent time alone with Kurt.
He had already disappeared long ago. I got up from the floor—my shoulder hurt a little, and I felt uncomfortable all over. I haven't slept in a bed since I joined the Phantom Troupe.
I suddenly feel like going back to Kukuroo Mountain. Anyway, it's torture no matter where I am, at least Illumi didn't damage my health.
I sat cross-legged in place for a while, lost in thought, and then got up and walked out. Somewhat unexpectedly, yet also quite logically, the door was easily pushed open when I went out; Kurt hadn't locked it at all.
I'm a little hungry.
There was a breakfast stall not far downstairs. I didn't go closer to investigate what food it sold. I just stood on the other side of the road, looking at it thoughtfully.
There was a convenience store right next to me. I glanced at the glass, scratched my hair, and tried to tame the stray hairs.
Then I stared blankly at the glass.
Although I found it a bit boring to be with Kurt, I had nowhere else to go...
There's no one I want to see.
What should we do next?
have no idea.
I stood there in front of the convenience store window for a long time, lost in thought. People passing by hurried by, not caring what I was thinking, and consciously and tacitly walked around me. The world is so vast, and my brief moment of peace will not bring anyone a different future.
My existence is so insignificant.
A while later, I belatedly noticed that there was a camera hanging diagonally in front of where I was standing.
...It was at this time that Kurt appeared.
As always, he didn't say anything extra and silently handed over a paper bag.
The aroma is enticing.
I glanced down and saw it was my usual favorite food.
“I’m going to get breakfast,” he said.
“Isn’t there one over there?” I pointed to the breakfast stall across the street.
Kurt looked at me, then at the breakfast stall.
“Didn’t you dislike that style?” he said.
"I don't actually like you that much," I replied immediately.
He stopped talking.
I suddenly realized that I might have gone a bit too far.
But Kurt's attitude was very calm, and he quickly nodded in agreement:
"I know."
...What do you know?
I don't even know why I'm saying this, or why I'm standing here right now.
This time, it was my turn to shut up.
Holding the paper bag in my hands, I took a step forward:
"...Is there anywhere nearby where I can sit?"
As a result, without any picnic blanket or food, the two of us ended up having a "picnic" on the grass in the park early in the morning.
"Have you eaten?" I asked him.
He nodded.
"What did you eat?" I asked again.
Kurt patiently started listing his breakfast with me.
I wasn't really interested, so I just gave a perfunctory "oh," and then it suddenly occurred to me:
“I stood in front of that convenience store for a long time… There were security cameras there, and people were coming and going. My mom might find me soon.”
"Do you want to go home?" he asked.
"No," I answered without thinking, and casually asked, "If I said I wanted to, would you take me home?"
He shut his mouth and remained silent.
I took another bite of my breakfast... It was a little dry; I wish I had some tea.
In the park in the morning, most people are jogging.
We sat on the grass in a way that stood out from the crowd.
"Actually, staying here like this isn't so bad," I said. "Do you think we can stay together like this forever?"
He still didn't say anything.
I could actually tell his answer from his silence.
Kurt disliked being forgotten, disliked having nothing, and craved attention.
But he prefers to stand in a dark corner.
He didn't want to lose anyone, and he refused to be the protagonist in the story. Instead, he longed to be a prominent supporting character in other people's lives.
After being cared for separately by Mrs. Zoldyck for so long, he couldn't change his behavior pattern and needed someone for "emotional dependence" at all times.
“Fine,” I swallowed the last bite of breakfast and said sincerely, “Let’s part ways amicably… You can leave me behind, go back and apologize to Killua, and say that you were thinking of me and were setting me free. He shouldn’t be angry after hearing that.”
Anyway, we don't have much to say to each other when we're together.
I thought it was a good suggestion, but he shook his head and refused.
“No,” he said.
"Anyway, you just want Killua to notice you, right?" I asked.
he:"……"
Our conversation, which I've lost count of, ended in the same way again.
Although he was a dark child at heart, Kurt's appearance was actually quite deceptive.
We sat on the grass in the park for a while, and soon passersby raised their phones in our direction... Kurt sat quietly on the grass, looking just like a gorgeous, antique doll.
Amidst the constant whispers and murmurs, there were occasionally glimpses of attention directed at me.
I casually rested my elbows on my knees, propped my chin up, and continued to stare blankly. But Kurt stood up first and reached out as if to take my hand.
I don't really like being talked about, so I simply stood up as he suggested and patted the grass clippings off my pants.
I had only taken two steps outside when two unfamiliar girls approached me and cautiously asked:
Hello everyone
I looked puzzled.
"May I take a picture with you?" the girls asked shyly. "You're all so beautiful... Are you models or bloggers? Can we follow you?"
“No,” I said, “we’re just out for a stroll… let’s skip the photos.”
"But..." they were a little unwilling.
"Get out of the way," Kurt's voice rang out coldly.
Those secretly watching him must have made him uncomfortable.
The girl's expression showed shock, her thoughts written all over her face—
Kurt's voice was already in the late stages of puberty, and it was easy to hear that clear, youthful quality.
He ignored the disillusioned looks of the two girls, pulled me along, and walked out with his head held high.
"So they're siblings?" I heard a murmured, almost self-reflective voice. "They really look alike... but why is it a boy?"
"You got it right—" I turned around and gave them a thumbs up, "They're siblings!"
Kurt pulled me with a bit of force, forcing me to quicken my pace.
No matter how many times I try, I can't understand how he can walk so fast, even running faster than me, while wearing wooden clogs.
"No need to explain to them," Kurt said unhappily after walking a distance.
“There was no explanation,” I said. “We just chatted for a bit.”
He still looked unhappy.
I don't understand what they're thinking.
I looked around for a while and noticed a flower shop at the end of the street.
"Let's go buy flowers," I suggested. "They're just opening!"
He walked toward the flower shop with my guidance.
Without thinking twice, I picked the largest bouquet of flowers and held it in my arms. Kurt paid for it without being prompted. I lowered my head and smelled the fragrance for a while, then plucked a white flower from it, broke off the stem, tucked it behind his ear, and stepped back to admire it for a moment.
"So beautiful!" I exclaimed.
Kurt still looked unhappy, but when he heard the praise, he lowered his eyes slightly, and his eyelashes trembled like butterfly wings.
Most boys probably don't like wearing flowers in their hair, so he might be unhappy about it, but I don't care. I've always been willful.
So, pretending not to notice his expression, I turned around with the flowers in my arms and started wandering around aimlessly and happily.
Passing by a clothing store window, I noticed that the dresses on display were very beautiful, and I couldn't help but stop and look at them for a while.
I want to buy clothes.
But in our current situation, which is practically homelessness, buying new clothes seems... not very appropriate.
Just as I was pondering whether or not to go in, Kurt reached out and nudged me from behind.
I took a step forward.
Perhaps it was too early, because the shop assistants seemed unmotivated, speaking in a listless tone, yet forcing a facade of enthusiasm as they approached me, asking about my shopping preferences and making recommendations.
She was very professional while providing service, but once she had made her recommendations, she became very enthusiastic—because work was over and she could finally gossip.
"Are you sisters?" she asked while helping him find the right size. "You two came out shopping together so early in the morning, you have such a good relationship."
I couldn't help but chuckle.
The conversation ended quickly. When I came out of the fitting room, Kurt was being pestered by the sales assistant to recommend clothes, but I didn't pay any attention.
The sales clerk kept chattering, "You two have great figures! You're both very pretty, and you look good in anything! The older sister has bought new clothes, so the younger sister should buy one too."
Kurt finally spoke.
“I am not a woman,” he said coldly.
The shop assistant's expression turned awkward for a moment.
I was finally drawn in, turned around, couldn't help but laugh, pulled Kurt over, and hugged his arm.
"That being said, he really is handsome. It's not surprising that you'd be captivated, let alone mistaken.
The shop assistant was quite embarrassed and chuckled, saying things like, "Ah, that's true."
Kurt made no comment.
He paid the bill, and I picked up the flowers again and turned to leave—only when the shop assistant called me back to remind me not to forget my shopping bag did I realize that the person who had accompanied me today was not a bodyguard.
I'm not the type to do things myself.
Just as I realized what was happening and was about to take the shopping bag, Kurt reached out his hand first.
All right.
Since that's the case, I turned around and walked forward on my own.
When they reached the next intersection, the boy, who had been silent all morning, suddenly spoke up.
“Sister Lei,” he said.
Me: "Hmm"
He asked, "Am I good-looking?"
I replied confidently, "Of course! Does anyone in your family have bad genes?"
Even with a large physique like Milluki, his facial features are still very well-proportioned.
"Then why..." he continued, slowly finishing his sentence, "...just because you don't like being with me."
"My brother too..."
Like a vow, he spoke softly but firmly:
"I will try my best..."
"Could we temporarily refrain from mentioning going home or leaving?"
The traffic lights are flashing; the red light, which prohibits passage, is about to go out and be replaced by the green light, which allows passage.
Amidst the flashing countdown numbers, I heard Kurt say:
"I don't understand... what's wrong... why doesn't Sister Lei want to be with me... I really tried."
He has indeed worked quite hard to gain his family's attention and approval.
For example, she endures her mother's hysteria and unpredictable personality, obeys her older brother's twisted personality, and knows that she is not liked by Killua, so even if she longs to, she rarely takes the initiative to approach Killua, always feeling that proving her strength will make Killua look at her with new eyes.
This lack of cooperation with Killua's plan is just a normal, natural reaction, a bit of childish temper.
Look at me.
I think I heard another voice in his heart saying something.
I just want you all to see me.
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