◎Two-in-one Lu Ge Chi Huai Xiao Long: three-no products◎
Lin Chaojin glanced at the sun, then walked ashore from the river with a harpoon in hand.
The two buckets brought from the shore were already filled with fish. Lin Chaojin took a look and said, "Not bad."
Lu Ge stood aside, twitching his lips, feeling like he was shot in the heart. This was still okay, but then wouldn't he and Chi Huai be scum?
But a real man can bend and stretch, so Lu Ge immediately said flatteringly: "Sister, you are not just okay, you are obviously very good."
Lin Chaojin glanced at him, then turned to Chi Ling and said, "We should have enough fish. Let's go down."
"I'm coming," Chi Ling walked over and glanced at the two buckets. "Brother, you two should be able to carry these two buckets of fish down."
Before Chi Huai could speak, Lu Ge patted his chest and interrupted, "Yes, of course not."
Is it possible? If they can't even do such a small thing, then these two burdens can be thrown away. Thinking of this, she looked at Chi Huai with sympathy, "Brother, you are right, right?"
Chi Huai glanced at him, bent down, picked up a bucket of water, and followed Lin Chaojin and the others down the mountain.
Lu Ge looked at the man walking ahead, holding the bucket in one hand and stroking his chin with the other, muttering, "Brother, you're just angry out of shame."
[Chi Huai: Are you humorous? Haha.]
[You two useless men, you can only be my little followers.]
A few people walked down the mountain and passed by the big banyan tree. They saw Director Zhang wearing a pair of slippers and happily eating half a watermelon.
Director Zhang felt the gaze that was as if it contained tangible resentment. He looked up and saw the two large buckets full of fish. He was so shocked that he almost dropped the melon in his hand. "Good job, you guys, you caught such a big catch."
"Heh, it's nothing compared to how comfortable you, Director Zhang, are, eating watermelon here," Lu Ge said sarcastically, crossing his arms over his chest.
Director Zhang ate a few more bites of watermelon before tossing the rind into the nearby trash can. He then said slowly, "Do you want to trade these fish for money? I have a fair price here. Ten yuan a piece, no matter the size."
"Ten yuan a piece?" Chi Ling frowned. Although she didn't know the prices, based on Director Zhang's usual personality, this price was obviously unreasonable.
"Why don't you just go grab it?" Lu Ge was much more blunt, rolling his eyes and complaining, "This fish weighs at least three or four pounds. Even if it's five yuan a pound, Director Zhang, you've already made half the difference."
"It's okay if you don't want to sell it to me. I won't force you to buy or sell it. You can take it to the vegetable market and sell it yourself," Director Zhang said nonchalantly, waving his hand.
After they finished speaking, they looked at each other. The town market was not far from Qingshui Village, and it only took about ten minutes to drive there. If they sold the goods themselves, they could almost make twice as much money.
"Or we can take it to town and sell it ourselves," Lu Ge suggested.
"Yeah, okay," the others nodded in unison.
"Hey, you really take them to town to sell," Director Zhang said with some regret after looking at the fat fish in their bucket. They can have a snack tonight if they buy them.
"Humph," Lu Ge lifted the bucket to the side, "I can't let you, a profiteer, get away with it."
"Okay," Director Zhang reluctantly withdrew his gaze, thinking that he would also ask a few staff members to catch some fish later. Anyway, the fish fry in that lake had been bought by their program team and the villagers in advance.
If Assistant Li was beside him at this moment and knew what he was thinking, he would definitely adjust his glasses and say, Director Zhang, it’s not time to dream yet during the day.
"Wow, are these the fish you caught?" Xiao Chuchu just walked out of the yard and was so shocked when she saw the two large buckets full of fish they were carrying that her jaw almost dropped to the ground.
Glancing at Lu Ge and Chi Huai, whose clothes were almost completely soaked, and Lin Chaojin and Chi Ling, who were barely wet, he assumed they were the only ones in the water and said to them, "Did you catch all these fish? That's amazing! You guys worked so hard! Look, your clothes are all wet."
After the words were spoken, the four people had different expressions, which was very exciting.
Xiao Chuchu sensed their unusual expressions and glanced at Lu Ge, whose face was flushed red. Then, she came to her senses and said with her mouth wide open, "Don't tell me this fish doesn't belong to you. It's all Chao Jin Lingling's achievement?"
[Haha, Chuchu, you've got the truth. There really isn't a share for them. Lu Ge and Chi Huai: Even though my clothes are soaked and it looks like I'm trying really hard, I get nothing.]
[Xiao Chuchu: dumbfounded.jpg.]
[Lu Ge: If I get hit by another arrow, I'll be socially dead. You guys are going to whip my corpse over and over again, right?]
"Ahaha," Xiao Chuchu looked away and smiled, then turned to look at Lin Chaojin and Chi Ling with admiration and said, "You two are amazing, you two are worthy of being the two of you."
Lu Ge looked at her with disdain and said, "Big star, that's not what you just said."
"Your mission is completed," Lin Chaojin asked.
"Yeah," Xiao Chuchu nodded, curled her lips, and raised her hands, wanting to cry but unable to. "Chopping wood is not an easy job."
Lin Chaojin glanced at her hand. The palm of her hand was red as if it had been squeezed by something, and two small blisters had appeared at the base of her fingers. She frowned, "How did this happen?"
Chi Ling also looked over and said distressedly, "It's all blistered."
"Ouch, it hurts," Xiao Chuchu sniffed and recounted the tiring experience of chopping wood for half a day that she and her brother had spent.
Xiao Chuchu and Xiao Long followed the instructions and came to a farmer's house. Seeing the old lady feeding chickens in the corner of the yard, they asked, "Hello, Auntie. We are here to chop firewood."
"Here I am chopping wood," the old lady said, taking two handfuls of rice from the winnowing basket and scattering them on the ground. Then she put the winnowing basket aside and walked over, pointing to a pile of wood in another corner of the yard. "Well, the wood is all there, chop it up."
Xiao Chuchu and the others looked in the direction she pointed, only to see a pile of wood half a man's height. Many of the wood looked thicker than her brother's thighs. She swallowed and asked, "What are these?"
"Yes," the old lady said as she took out two axes from the house and gave them to them, "Here, take them and chop them. However," the old lady looked at Xiao Chuchu suspiciously and said worriedly, "Can you, a little girl with your small arms and legs, do it?" It seemed that she didn't have much strength. The tall guy next to her was better off.
"Okay," Xiao Chuchu took the axe. For the sake of food and money, she had to do it even if it meant she had to.
Xiao Long also took the axe and weighed it. "This axe is quite heavy." It would take a lot of effort to swing it, not to mention using it to chop wood.
Xiao Long picked up a few relatively small pieces of wood and placed them in front of Xiao Chuchu, "You chop these small ones."
"Okay, thank you brother," Xiao Chuchu held the axe in both hands, full of confidence.
Xiao Long also took a large piece of wood and placed it flat on the ground. The two siblings used axes to move the wood up and down, left and right, but they still couldn't figure out how to start.
"Oh, you two kids, it looks like you've never chopped wood before. Let me show you how to do it." The old lady standing nearby saw that they were still not moving. She rolled up her sleeves, took Xiao Long's axe, and pushed him aside. "Watch."
The old lady swung the axe, and Xiao Chuchu and the others felt only a gust of wind, and with a "bang", the thigh-thick wood was split in half.
The old lady withdrew her hand and turned to look at them, "Did you see that?"
"I see, I see," Xiao Chuchu and Xiao Long were stunned by the old lady's move and nodded hurriedly.
"Okay, then you guys come."
Xiao Long took the axe back, took a horse stance, weighed the axe, and chopped down another piece of wood.
Xiao Chuchu silently took a few steps back and watched her brother's actions intently.
With a "click", the axe hit the wood, but only half of it was embedded in the wood.
Xiao Long silently tried to pick up the axe again, but the axe was stuck in the firewood and couldn't be pulled out. Xiao Long took a deep breath in disbelief and pulled the axe hard with a "hmm".
Xiao Chuchu watched his brother from the side and his face turned red. It was obvious that he was using a lot of strength, but the axe didn't move at all.
"Oh, young man, you stepped on a piece of wood," the old lady couldn't help but said anxiously when she saw his action.
After hearing the command, Xiao Long put his left foot on the wood to steady it, and used his other two hands to pull with all his might.
"Yes, that's it," the old lady said, standing by and commanding, "No, try harder. You can even squat in the toilet with constipation."
"Puchi," Xiao Chuchu couldn't help laughing after hearing the old lady's string of words. Not to mention that his brother's face was red from trying so hard to hold it in, and his nose and mouth were wrinkled, as if he was constipated.
When Xiao Long heard this, his face turned red and blue, and he almost sprained his waist.
[Haha, God damn constipation, the old lady said something shocking!]
[Xiao Long: Auntie, it's not appropriate to say that. Please give me some face.]
Just as the old lady gave the command, Xiao Long fell to the ground with a "bang" due to the inertia. Fortunately, the axe was pulled out.
Xiao Long sat on the ground with his eyes dazed, and now he is autistic.jpg.
After a long while, Xiao Long stood up again and started a new round of chopping wood.
Xiao Chuchu watched her brother's joke for a while, then picked up the axe and started chopping wood. She first took a small piece of wood and placed it on the ground, gestured for a moment, and then with a "click", the axe came down and the wood was instantly split in half.
This caused Xiao Long to look at her, but Xiao Chuchu waved her hand nonchalantly and said, "The wood is small and easy to split." Then she picked up another larger piece of wood and chopped it down with the axe with a "click". The wood was immediately split into two halves again.
Xiao Long's eyes were filled with suspicion.
Xiao Chuchu calmly took another bigger piece, and with one blow of the axe, the wood was still split in half. Now Xiao Chuchu scratched his head when he saw his masterpiece, and said embarrassedly: "Hey, I'm quite strong."
Xiao Long took a piece of wood as thick as the one he had just chopped and placed it in front of her. He said, "Chop it." He didn't believe it.
"Okay," Xiao Chuchu was eager to try. She held the axe handle with both hands, tested it on the big wood, and then with a "click", the wood was split in half. Xiao Chuchu continued with another axe, and the big wood was completely split in half.
Xiao Long stared at the wood with his eyes wide open, muttering to himself, "This is impossible, how could it be split?"
Xiao Chuchu retracted her hand and raised her eyebrows, "How come I am so powerful?"
"Hey, you can do it, little girl. You're much stronger than your brother." The old lady glanced at Xiao Long, clicked her tongue and shook her head in disdain. "You're no good, young man. This muscular body is all show and no use."
Xiao Long couldn't help but shrink his body after hearing this, trying to retract his muscles, tears streaming down his face. He was really not weak, and this muscle was trained by him as a fitness coach! Quality guaranteed!
[Congratulations to Brother Xiao for obtaining a Useless Man Card. You can now form a team with Lu Ge and Chi Huai next door. We've already picked a name for you: Three No Products, Doghead.]
[Sister in front, please don't leave. I'll lend you my brain for a minute. How could you come up with such a good name! Three-no product?! I almost vomited with laughter, and the deep meaning of the expression was directed at Lu Ge and the other two.]
Xiao Chuchu found it funny when she said this, "Hey, so I chopped most of the firewood."
At this time, Xiao Long came over and touched his nose after hearing this, "Sister, at least give your brother some face."
Lu Ge walked over and patted Xiao Long's shoulder with a look of sympathy, "Brother Xiao, don't worry, we are all the same," and he couldn't help but sing the last sentence.
Xiao Long twitched his lips and said thank you. He didn't want to be like you.
"But luckily we chopped that pile of firewood and got 150 yuan," Xiao Chuchu continued. "What are you going to do with these two big buckets of fish?"
"Yeah," Lin Chaojin nodded, "Let's go to the town after lunch."
"In town?" Xiao Chuchu's eyes lit up when she heard that. "It just so happens that I have nothing to do this afternoon, and I want to go with you guys."
"Sure," Lin Chaojin did not refuse. She looked at the two buckets of fish and exchanged a glance with Chi Ling.
Chi Ling said to Xiao Chuchu, "Do you guys eat fish? We'll give you one."
"How can I accept this?" Xiao Chuchu's face was full of surprise, but when she thought that these were the fruits of their labor, she felt embarrassed to accept them.
"It's okay," Lin Chaojin agreed, "There are still more than a dozen in the two large buckets."
"Thank you," Xiao Chuchu saw that they really didn't mind, so she took out a basin of water from the house and filled it up.
Everyone was having fun here when two people walked up to the foot of the mountain.
Yan Sinuo and Yan Ru came up, both with bad expressions, and Yan Sinuo's face looked even uglier.
The closer I got, the more I realized that they looked like they had been in a fight.
Yan Ru was better off. She was wearing long sleeves and a hat. Apart from a few small red marks on her arms, there were no other scars from the corn leaves.
But Yan Sinuo was in a miserable situation. He went to work wearing a short-sleeved shirt and shorts with a decorative silver chain hanging on it. He also wore a watch on his wrist and earrings in his ears. This outfit made him look like a trendy and cool boy.
But if you go to work, you are just a big candle in the Bi family - just for show.
As a result, there were several red marks on his neck, arms, legs, and even on his face caused by corn leaves. Seeing his miserable appearance, the other guests felt a little pity for him.
Yan Sinuo walked over and saw that they looked no different than usual. He became unbalanced and asked, "Have you completed the mission?"
"Yeah," everyone nodded.
Yan Sinuo gritted his teeth and couldn't help but glare at Lu Ge. This guy was the most annoying.
Lu Ge looked at him in confusion, thinking there was something wrong with him. However, he had a good harvest today and was in a good mood, so he didn't bother to pay attention to him. Thinking about the fish they had just given to Xiao Chuchu's group, they couldn't favor one over the other. He discussed with his sister, "Should we give them a fish?"
As he spoke, Chi Ling and the others also looked over and waited for Lin Chaojin to make a decision.
"Give it to me," Lin Chaojin nodded calmly.
"Okay," Lu Ge said, turning to Yan Sinuo, "Hey, do you want fish? We'll give you one."
Seeing him like this, Yan Sinuo felt that he was giving alms in a condescending manner. He gritted his teeth and said, "No, I don't need your fake kindness," and then he walked away quickly.
Lu Ge looked at him speechlessly with three big question marks on his face. "Whether you want it or not, I can't bear to give it up."
After discussing it, they decided to go back and have lunch before going to town.
Back in the yard, Lin Chaojin and Lu Ge looked at the kitchen in silence for a while.
"Sister, why don't we go over and team up with Brother Huai?" Lu Ge suggested, scratching his head.
"I think it's okay," Lin Chaojin said after looking at the kitchen.
"OK."
The two of them went next door carrying a fish and some vegetables that they had bought on credit from Director Zhang.
Lu Ge strode in first, his voice warm and friendly, "Hey, Brother Huai, my dear brother, can my sister and I help you cook? If you have any other chores, just let us do it."
Chi Huai was preparing ingredients in the kitchen. When he heard his words, he glanced at the woman standing in the yard, then shifted his gaze to Lu Ge's face and said lightly, "It's up to you."
"That'll do."
The four of them prepared lunch together, and after eating, they planned to go to town with Xiao Chuchu and the others.
Passing by Yan Ruoyan Sinuo's house, they looked at each other, and out of kindness as colleagues, they walked over and knocked on the door.
Yan Sinuo was applying medicine in the yard. When he heard the knock on the door, he went over and opened it impatiently, "Something happened."
"We are going to town and would like to ask if you are going with us?" Xiao Chuchu said.
"No," Yan Sinuo said, and closed the door with a bang.
They looked at the closed door, exchanged glances, shrugged, and continued walking down the mountain.
When they reached the foot of the mountain, they went to ask Director Zhang for transportation. They couldn't just let the six of them walk there.
"Transportation? That's easy, but traveling costs money. I won't charge you much. Just give me a total of 20 yuan for the six of you," Director Zhang said leisurely.
Everyone was silent, but since they were under someone's roof, they had to bow their heads, so they could only agree to him.
"Well, that's the car," Director Zhang led them a few steps and pointed at the car not far away and said.
Lin Chaojin and the others looked in the direction he pointed, "Wait, Director Zhang, the means of transportation you are talking about is an electric tricycle?" Several people said in disbelief.
"What's so great about a tricycle? It has a lot of space, is convenient for travel, and is easy to control," Director Zhang said proudly, pointing at the car and praising it as if it were a BMW. "The goods have been shipped, and there will be no refunds," and then he walked away quickly with his hands behind his back.
"It's okay," Xiao Chuchu said with a smile, "My brother drove a tricycle last time, so he's familiar with this car."
After he finished speaking, everyone looked at Xiao Long in unison. Xiao Long faced their gazes and grinned, "Yes, I know. Leave it to me."
Lu Ge and the others looked at the car and knew that this was the only thing they could do.
Xiao Chuchu and her brother sat in the front of the car, and the other four sat facing each other in the back, Lin Chaojin and Lu Ge in one row, and Chi Huai and Chi Ling in another.
"Are you seated properly?" Xiao Long raised his voice in the front.
"alright."
"Okay, I'll open it then."
With a few "thumps", the tricycle started moving. Fortunately, the roads in this village were paved with cement. Although there were some potholes, it was generally flat. Otherwise, the people sitting in the back might have been shaken and fallen off.
This tricycle is open-top, and when you sit on it, the wind blows directly on your face.
Lin Chaojin was sitting on it, and Chi Huai was sitting opposite him. As soon as he got in the car, he leaned against it, crossed his arms and closed his eyes. His leisurely and contented posture made anyone who didn't know him think he was in a nanny car.
Lin Chaojin looked away and reached out to push the wind-blown hair behind her ears.
Lu Ge put his hands on the handlebars, resting his chin on them, and looked happily at the fields passing by in the distance. "I have to say, this convertible is really comfortable to sit in." As he said this, he sat up straight, stretched out his arms, closed his eyes and felt the wind blowing. What was there to be dissatisfied with such a novel look?
The following drone captured the scene of several people, the mountain village road, the tricycle, and the people sitting on it.
[Haha, if they were dressed a little more rustically, it would be a perfect country love story.]
[Don't say it has that smell, but they are handsome and beautiful. Even riding in this tricycle is like riding in a luxury car.]
I really think they are funny and open-minded. Even though they are big stars, beautiful women and handsome men, they never put on airs.
[Haha, isn't our Lu Ge really a comedian? Look at that kid, he was quite disgusted at first, but now he's so funny.]
"Hey, Sister Chaojin, Lingling, let's take some photos to commemorate the occasion," Xiao Chuchu was also enjoying the ride. It turned out that riding a tricycle with several people was completely different from the last time when she and her brother rode together.
"Okay," Lin Chaojin and Chi Ling did not refuse.
Xiao Chuchu took out her cell phone, stretched out her arm and pointed the camera at the few people. Lin Chaojin and Chi Ling looked at the camera and smiled.
"I'll be there later," Lu Ge squeezed in after hearing what they said, grinning widely at the camera, showing eight teeth, and then made the internationally accepted gesture, "Yes."
"Sister, there's me too," Xiao Long glanced over while driving, "I have to take a picture of your brother's cool driving posture."
"Okay, okay, come on, all of you, come and look at the camera," Xiao Chuchu looked at the selfie camera on her phone, "Hey, someone wake up Chi Huai, together."
Lin Chaojin glanced across at the other side. At this moment, Chi Ling nudged her brother's arm with her elbow and said, "Brother, take a picture."
Chi Huai opened his eyes and met Lin Chaojin's gaze. Lin Chaojin calmly looked away and looked at the camera.
"Here I am, Eggplant," Xiao Chuchu took a few photos before she was satisfied. "Okay, can I post on Weibo?"
"It's up to you," several people said without objection.
"Then I'll post it," Xiao Chuchu opened Weibo and casually browsed the hot searches. Then her eyes fixed on the neatly arranged hot searches below, and her eyes widened.
#Lin Chaojin and I and my useless brother#
#Chi Ling and my useless brother#
#Xiao Chuchu and I and my useless brother#
#Lu Ge Chi Huai Xiao Long three no products#
"Haha, what the hell is this," Xiao Chuchu couldn't help laughing after seeing it, and turned around to share it with them with a gloating look, "Hurry up and open your phones to check the trending searches, haha, you'd never guess it," and said with a loving look at Lu Ge and the other three.
Facing her malicious gaze, Lu Ge quickly took out his mobile phone and opened Weibo. Wow, what the hell was this hot search? He clicked on the one related to him.
Upon entering, I saw a blogger post a Weibo post with screenshots of their tragic fishing trip today. The first three GIFs showed the highlights of his and Chi Huai's fishing trips, with him missing two big fish and Chi Huai coming up empty-handed twice. The next three GIFs showed the glorious exploits of Lin Chaojin and Chi Ling, two master fishermen. The next three GIFs showed them squatting by the river when a fat fish fell from the sky, and then Yan'er eagerly trying to pick it up.
Caption: Director Zhang Sheng is sure that this is not a comedy variety show, or Lu Ge is possessed by some comedian. I am going to die of laughter here today, haha. To quote the comments, these pictures are real photos of the eldest lady and her useless brother.
The comments were filled with a bunch of weirdos, and Lu Ge also saw no less than ten IDs with his nickname mercilessly mocking their idols on Weibo.
Master Ge, I am your wife: Haha, really, my brother’s reputation is ruined, brother, please don’t be so funny, your image as a cool guy is gone, then I have to change my ID: Master Ge, I am your wife, dog head.
I am the woman that Mr. Ge can't get: Oh, my sister-in-law is really hard-working, and she has to take care of Lu, an older child, and useless Ge.
As for the other "three-no" product, Lu Ge clicked in with a puzzled look on his face, then left angrily, "You're just talking nonsense. You can't even think of a "three-no" product."
At this moment, the netizens and fans in front of the camera were almost laughing to death when they saw this scene.
[Haha, Ge Ye was so angry that smoke came out of his head. He was so mean to the netizens.]
[Hh, those trending searches must have helped a lot with fans, sisters. I just saw Ge Ye staring at those IDs on Weibo for several seconds. Good luck to you all.]
Xiao Chuchu's eyes turned, and she edited her Weibo and posted nine grids of their photos, along with the trending search terms.
@肖楚楚: Here we are! Today is the day for the pretty girls and the pretty boys to go out. (Oh, no, it should be three pretty girls and three useless guys, lighting a cigarette.jpg).
As soon as it was posted, fans and netizens left messages on Weibo.
[Miss Chu Bao is right!]
[Ahhh, this photo of three beautiful ladies is so gorgeous.]
[Hhh, here come the three useless men's stamp of approval.]
But there were also some discordant comments.
[No, why are there only six of them? Aren't there eight guests?]
[These six people are not forming a small team to isolate Yan Sinuo and Yan Ruo.]
When this was said, other fans became dissatisfied and posted several screenshots and links to the recorded video.
[Open your dog eyes and see who is isolating whom. Lu Ge was kind enough to give him fish, but hey, he didn't appreciate it and rolled his eyes.jpg.]
[Also, when the six of them set out, they had invited Yan Sinuo and the others, but it was Yan Sinuo himself who said he couldn't go. And I haven't even said Yan Sinuo is impolite. He slammed the door in front of people. Who can tolerate him?]
[The six of them are just too kind. If it were me, I wouldn't bother with them.]
On the other side, someone received the picture, zoomed in again and again, and finally found what was wrong, then quickly went to the base camp to edit it and post it on Weibo.
@林朝衿Chi Huai together today: Look what I found, sisters! Two photos from Chuchu's Weibo post today! Focus on the ones I circled! In the first, the young lady is looking at Huai Shen! In the second, they're staring at each other! Okay, you might say staring at each other is fine, we're just going to go for it. But look at the bottom half of the picture—see? Chi Huai's leg is stretched right next to the young lady's ankle, and she hasn't moved away! Huai Shen's aggressive posture—tsk tsk, I'm done with it.
Double ACP is real: Ahhh, sister, the eyes are powerful. Absolutely, this posture is normal when I sit face to face with my boyfriend, my boyfriend also likes to stretch his legs over like this! Chi Huai does this, he must be interested in the eldest lady!
Did Lin Chaojin and Chi Huai officially announce their relationship today? But the eldest lady didn’t hide either!! They must have something, if they don’t have anything, I’ll use my head as a chair for you to sit on!
The author has something to say:
1The two-part allegorical saying is excerpted from the Internet.
Ah, what should the CP of Lin Chaojin and Chi Huai be called? I’m so confused.
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