Chapter 57 "If I could still beg, Buddha, I would like to marry her."
Night fell.
The brightly lit courtyard stood out starkly against the pitch-black night.
Like the struggle between night and day, silent and still.
On the surface, things seemed calm, but underneath, things were in turmoil.
The servants, who had been busy all day, were now lying in their dormitories, but they were all full of energy.
"I told you, you all heard it last night, right? I was absolutely shocked."
"Who isn't? I couldn't have imagined it even if I had a hundred brains. It turns out that Miss Beizhen was forced to marry into the Zheng family by Madam."
An older maid said, "I think there were signs of this all along. Think about it, back then, Miss Beizhen personally accused Mr. Zheng of raping her. She hated him so much. How could she suddenly want to marry him when she grew up?"
"Stop being so hindsight. Why didn't you say that back then?"
The woman stuck out her tongue. "Back then, Miss Beizhen kept saying she was willing, and even knelt at the door for two days to beg. Her determination was so strong that even the master believed her, let alone us."
"No wonder we all hate Miss Beizhen so much, yet the Madam still dotes on her so much."
"If you love her so much, why did you have the heart to let her marry such a beast?"
"You don't know this, do you? It's true that Madam loves Miss Beizhen, but the premise is that she absolutely loves her husband and her own son even more."
"But our young master loves Miss Beizhen too. Just think of the state he was in during the first few years after Miss Beizhen got married. Do you think he would be dumbfounded if he knew all this?"
"I advise you to stop this topic here. Madam just had the butler convey that anyone who dares to tell the young master about this will be in big trouble."
The other servants around quickly covered their mouths.
They all thought that Lu Zhenyu was leaving the Shen family when disaster struck, but now that they know the truth, they can't help but feel guilty.
"No wonder I cut my finger while chopping vegetables the other day. It was karma. I'll never talk bad about Miss Beizhen with Xiao Cui and the others again."
"What else can we do after saying what we've said? Starting tomorrow, we'll serve Miss Beizhen well as a way of making up for it."
"That's right. The Shen family has always treated us servants very well, and we can't do anything to betray our masters."
The girl slapped the bed and sat up abruptly. "I've decided! I'll get up early tomorrow and make Miss Beizhen a black chicken and ginseng soup to nourish her!"
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The bedroom was dark and quiet late at night.
The bedroom door was gently pushed open, and a tall figure tiptoed in.
The bedroom curtains weren't drawn, and the light from outside seeped in, revealing a person curled up on the bed.
In a daze, Lu Zhenyu felt two hands wrapping around her waist from behind.
The familiar smell of tobacco wafted over, and she moved back a little, letting the other person pull her into their arms.
The warm palms felt wonderfully comfortable against my lower abdomen.
Shen Jingsi asked softly, "Why are you sleeping so early?"
Lu Zhenyu said in a light voice, "My stomach hurts."
"Period?"
"Um."
A large hand slipped under the hem of the nightgown and gently massaged the slightly chubby belly.
"I'll have someone make you some white fungus and red date sweet soup in a bit. Drink some while it's hot before you go to sleep, and your stomach will feel better."
Lu Zhenyu shook her head, "I'm tired, I don't want to go through all that trouble."
Shen Jingsi propped himself up, peeked out from behind, and took a look at the person by the moonlight.
Seeing his beautiful brows furrowed into a deep frown, he felt a pang of sympathy. "Just keep lying down. I'll bring it to you and feed you when it's done, okay?"
After a long while, a soft "Mmm" was heard.
Shen Jingsi smiled and gently kissed the cool forehead with loving gestures.
The person left and didn't return until an hour later.
Shen Jingsi bent down and gently scooped the girl, who was still frowning in her sleep, into his arms. He picked up the bowl of sugar water, scooped a spoonful, blew on it to cool it, and carefully tested the temperature with his mouth before putting it into her soft lips.
After taking a sip of the sweet and warm syrup, Lu Zhenyu opened her sleepy eyes.
My gaze focused on the man's right hand, which was holding the soup spoon, and I could see the reddened back of his hand.
She looked up. "Is your hand hot?"
Shen Jingsi didn't take the injury seriously. "Be good and finish your sugar water first."
Lu Zhenyu was fed bite after bite.
The empty bowl was put back on the bedside table.
Shen Jingsi moved closer to the headboard, holding the person in his arms like a child. His hand, which was under the blanket, slipped back into his nightgown and gently rubbed the cool lower abdomen.
Is it any better?
It might be psychological, but even though the feeling of heaviness was still there, Lu Zhenyu didn't seem to feel any pain anymore.
She nodded, her obedient appearance making Shen Jingsi's heart itch. He lowered his head and kissed her cherry lips, which were stained with sugar water.
"Does your arm still hurt? Let me see."
Lu Zhenyu took her right hand out from under the blanket; it was still wrapped in gauze.
By her standards, that burn was nothing; on the contrary, the bandage made it seem like her whole hand was useless.
There was silence above her. She looked up and saw him frowning deeply, his eyes fixed on the arm.
Feeling the person in his arms move, Shen Jingsi asked, "What do you want?"
"Go get the medicine."
Lu Zhenyu slipped out of his arms and onto the bed, then took the burn ointment from the coffee table and returned to the bed.
He sat cross-legged in front of Chen Jingsi, took his right hand which was burned, squeezed ointment onto the blisters, and gently spread it with a cotton swab while blowing on it.
Using the light behind him, Shen Jingsi looked intently at the girl and heard her ask, "Did you make this sweet soup yourself?"
He originally intended to ask a servant to do it, but inexplicably ended up in the kitchen.
Lu Zhenyu's tone was gentle, with a hint of doting, "So you think that just having white fungus and red dates isn't enough, and you want to contribute a few pieces of your own Tang Monk flesh?"
It's alright, I can even joke around with him, so his stomach probably doesn't hurt as much anymore.
But the pain in Shen Jingsi wasn't in his hands, it was in his heart.
He stopped letting her apply the medicine, reached out and pulled her into his arms, burying her head in the crook of his neck.
"Feel sorry."
The apology, delivered with a trembling voice, startled Lu Zhenyu.
The girl didn't know which matter he was referring to, but Shen Jingsi did.
The skin scalded by hot water was very painful. He was furious when he learned that she was being bullied by her own servants. He even wanted to kill her after discovering that she was being mistreated by outsiders.
He originally thought that if he pretended to follow his mother and Duan Xi'er's wishes and stirred up the Zheng family, the person in his arms would come back.
She never imagined that she would suffer such injustice in the very home where she grew up.
When he went upstairs to call people for dinner, he walked up the stairs one step at a time, feeling as if a thousand pounds were on his shoulders, and his eyes were full of despair.
At that moment, he suddenly began to question whether the scheme he had put so much effort into was right or wrong.
Feeling Lu Zhenyu reach out and stroke his back, Shen Jingsi hugged her tighter.
His embrace was warm, and Lu Zhenyu, who had been in a daze for several hours, soon felt sleepy.
As his breathing gradually returned to normal, Shen Jingsi held the person in his arms without moving.
Looking at her fair face under the moonlight, now flushed with pink, a little bit of flesh was squeezed out from her chest.
The once aggressive and ruthless Shen Jingsi, who had been so stern in public that afternoon, had unknowingly softened his eyes.
Knowing she was asleep, the things I had wanted to say to her face but hadn't were now able to be said.
“Zhenzhen, I actually remember everything.”
“Shen Jingsi always remembered that his Zhenzhen liked snow, and that snowman was built for you from the very beginning.”
"They told me on the day of the first snow that you also built one at the Zheng family's house, so you remember it, right?"
"I knew it! I know you so well, how could I not see through you?"
Recalling the second night in Jinyun Bay, when the girl suddenly had a panic attack in her sleep, she kept saying, "I don't want to get married, I don't want to."
Shen Jingsi misheard it as "I don't want to go home".
Later, she said again, "Godmother, can I not get married?"
Shen Jingsi, who was holding Lu Zhenyu in his arms, suddenly trembled!
That night, he didn't sleep a wink, sitting on the edge of the bed holding his sleeping child, watching quietly.
The word "godmother" helped Shen Jingsi understand many things he couldn't figure out that night.
So, his girl didn't actually want to marry him in the first place.
She was forced into it, by his mother.
Why?
Is it just because he likes her and said he would never marry anyone but her in this life that he has to send her away?
Shen Jingsi was unaware of the truth, but he tacitly accepted this conjecture.
His tears at breakfast that day weren't from resentment, but from a sudden realization that everything the girl in front of him had suffered was thanks to him.
Shen Jingsi didn't want to say "sorry" to the person in his arms anymore, because saying sorry was useless.
Power, status, and supreme authority are the only things that matter.
The girl in his arms was fast asleep, her cheeks glowing even more rosy. He reached out and gently tucked the strands of hair that clung to her cheeks behind her ears.
"It's okay, it doesn't matter who it is. Trust me, I'll take care of everyone and all the trouble. When everything's over, Shen Jingsi will marry you in a grand and spectacular way, okay?"
The man spoke softly to the sleeping girl.
After a long while, he took out the jade safety buckle he had been carrying for a long time from his pocket.
In the dim light, the pure, translucent jadeite refracted the moonlight, emitting a faint green glow.
This reminded Shen Jingsi of the year the girl turned eighteen, when he racked his brains trying to figure out what the best coming-of-age gift would be.
Coincidentally, the next day I heard that Feng Manman, that love-struck fool, went to a temple in a neighboring city and climbed ten thousand steps just to pray for a peace charm for the sick Duan Yu.
He even mocked the person to their face.
They say she's got a brain full of lard, unable to see that Duan Yu doesn't like her at all, and just does stupid things to feel good about herself.
But when it came to himself, he tossed and turned all night, unable to sleep. The next morning, he woke up in a daze and the bird quietly flew away.
But Lu Zhenyu hasn't worn that safety buckle for a long time; she probably lost it during the five years she was abroad.
But it's okay.
None of that matters.
As long as he's sure she still has feelings for him, and that she might have had even the slightest bit of affection for him, then nothing else matters.
Shen Jingsi put the jade buckle with the gold thread pouch the size of a fingernail on the girl's head.
He lowered his head and gently kissed her soft, tender lips.
"Sweet dreams, baby."
That day, the man who climbed ten thousand steps spent a fortune on the temple and was personally received by Master Fang Hui, the most respected master in the temple, who gave him a talisman and answered his questions.
Everyone knows that the jade necklace that Duan Xi'er wears every day was acquired by the Shen family at an auction for a huge sum of money.
But no one knew that the priceless, one-of-a-kind item was just a scrap piece.
The real emerald rough stones are here with Shen Jingsi.
Master Fang Hui personally tied the lucky bag to the safety buckle brought by the man and consecrated it in front of the Buddha statue.
The man accepted the necklace with both hands, then knelt before the Buddha statue and silently made a wish:
"I don't ask how much she loves me, I just ask that she live a peaceful, happy, and fulfilling life."
"If I could still ask, Buddha, I would like to marry her."
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