Chapter 27
Being born into royalty means that one can never escape the scheming and machinations of the world.
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My name is Song Leyuan. My mother hopes that I will be happy and carefree, like a kite flying outside the palace walls.
But my mother forgot that kites have strings, and being in the palace was like being a string that fell on me.
Later, the Empress Dowager used herself as bait to lure her second brother, who was most fiercely competing with her elder brother for the throne, and his mother into the scheme.
From then on, there was no one in the world who could compete with my brother for the throne and stand on equal footing.
I still remember that day when my mother taught me how to make flower cakes.
My mother said I was clever and could learn things quickly.
My mother also said that I can be silly sometimes, and she specifically told me that I should never cook for anyone other than someone I like.
That day, the Empress Dowager wore a commoner's dress and looked very beautiful.
But at night she coughed up blood, yet her smile remained gentle.
"Good girl, Yueyuan. Your brother will protect you from now on."
I couldn't see her expression clearly at that time because my eyes were filled with tears and I couldn't see anything. I only remembered this sentence.
But is the throne really that important?
Since that day, my elder brother has indeed been obedient to me in everything.
Even though I saw my brother crying uncontrollably alone in the middle of the night, I still couldn't forgive him.
Yes, I'm the one who's innocent.
But I am inherently bad. My mother, the only one who could control this badness, left, and there is no one left in this world who can restrain me.
When I was punished, my elder brother held me and protected me very well. In the end, my elder brother was covered in blood and couldn't get out of bed for a month.
At that time, I did not forgive him either. I only knew that in this world, only power is the greatest.
Later, I helped my elder brother ascend the throne step by step, personally sent my father to his death, and cruelly executed all my other brothers and sisters one by one.
People curse me, and even my imperial brother feels guilty towards me.
So he always goes along with me, and even if I make a huge mistake, he will calm things down.
But I know that he felt more than just guilt; he also felt fear towards me.
I fear that one day I will kill him and then sit on the throne myself.
ridiculous.
I'm not interested in that position. I get up earlier than the chickens and go to bed later than the dogs every day, and I have to deal with those trivial matters in the harem every few days.
What could be more enjoyable than indulging in male beauty all day long?
Gradually, he stopped being wary of me.
Occasionally, just like when we were kids, they would pull my braids when no one was around.
Of course, I'll pull it back!
That day, I was still playing the game of catching beautiful women with boredom when I caught a whiff of a strange and pleasant cool fragrance.
I imagine such a fragrant and handsome man must be aloof and cold.
But to my surprise, I guessed none of them correctly!
She was not only gentle and innocent, but also... a woman.
She wasn't afraid of me; her gaze towards me showed no apprehension, no fear, and no hatred.
There was a light in her eyes, and at that moment I felt as if I were her god.
Everyone curses me, fears me, and hates me, but she sees me this way.
In a moment of surprise, I pulled her out of the lake.
You idiot, do you really think I don't know you want to drag me down into the lake again?
But that's what makes it even more interesting.
What's funny is that she praised me for being kind-hearted and for having a good temper.
Well, it was the first time I had heard this since my mother's death, so I forgave her.
While admiring the flowers, she murmured to herself, "Are those beautiful flowers delicious?"
I pretended not to know, but I couldn't help but chuckle to myself.
She's the only one in the whole world who would dare to act like this in front of me.
Coincidentally, I did the same thing when I was a child, and later my mother made me flower cakes.
Perhaps people will always feel pity for those who have had similar experiences to themselves.
So I made her some flower cakes myself, and she ate them with great relish, as if they were the most delicious thing in the world.
Hmph, at least she has good taste!
Of course, I'm also waiting, waiting for her to find out that I made those flower cakes!
Later, when she entered the palace, she asked if she could go to rescue her elder sister if her brother went to her palace.
You idiot, I would have gone even if she hadn't told me.
Because I know that Song Jue will not only take her for her beauty, but also use my unique fondness for her as leverage to hold me back.
At that time, I was unaware that she could have easily left Song Jue's clutches, nor did I know that she would later have Song Jue beg her elder sister for help.
When I went back to that time to visit Consort Xian's palace, I inexplicably brought a lot of gifts to take to her mother.
As for the reason, I didn't know at the time.
Looking back now, I realize that even back then, there was already a trace of her in my heart.
I wish I could marry her, so that long list of gifts is a testament to my love that I can never express.
That was my betrothal gift to her, but she'll never know it.
Since I realized my feelings, I no longer hid them. When I held another garden party, I invited Miss Jiang from the Jiang family.
Tsk, that's the idiot who wanted to scheme against her.
How ridiculous! The torture chamber in my princess's residence is even more terrifying than Song Jue's Zhaoyu prison. Those two lowly people naturally spoke their minds without reservation.
I don't know what she was thinking, but I want to avenge her.
Oh right, we also need to add Jiang Qi.
The reason is simple: when I wake up in the middle of the night, I always dream that she is tortured and bruised all over by Jiang Qi and Su Meier.
When I woke up, I felt a sharp pain in my chest!
They made the current princess feel pain in her heart, so I will make them wish they were dead!
She was also worried that I would be targeted by the Jiang family.
Silly girl, I am Song Leyuan.
She was Song Leyuan, who murdered her father and siblings and treated human life as worthless.
Later, she gave me a good luck charm. I had seen many fine jade pendants with Buddha and Bodhisattva carved on them, but I had kept them as playthings in the storeroom.
Because I don't believe in ghosts or gods.
But that amulet was indeed the first time I had ever seen one. When I was a child, my mother said she would ask me for one, but she forgot about it later. She only knew that she wanted to secure that cold dragon throne for her brother.
So from then on, I kept thinking about it for a long time.
Hmm, I don't want to talk about my mother anymore. From now on, I only want to talk about her.
I mentioned her every day, and from now on I'll only mention her.
Bai Lingwu, Lingwu, Wu'er.
She said, "May the amulet bring you peace. I wish Your Highness a long and healthy life, free from worries, and filled with joy every year."
May you live to be a hundred years old, free from worries, and always happy?
Her smile was so beautiful, it made my eyes well up and I felt like crying.
Indeed, people cry when they are cherished and treated with kindness.
later……
How wonderful it would be if everything stopped right now.
I watched as she painstakingly paved the way for the Bai family, and watched as her face gradually turned pale, as if she had exhausted her life force.
Looking at her coming into this world, it seems as if she only came to bring happiness and joy to her parents and her elder sister.
But what about me?
No, it's not just me...
And those two fools who were barely clinging to life, the not-so-bright maidservant beside her, and the compassionate Master Liaoji.
During the three days she lay in a deep sleep at Cangshan Temple, I knelt and bowed three times and nine times from the first step of the temple to the last step.
I prayed that Buddha could see my sincerity, and I prayed for the long life, carefree existence, and constant joy that she spoke of.
As I watched the sunset with her, I thought to myself, she is so innocent and kind, Buddha will surely bless her.
It definitely will...
At that moment, she said in her usual gentle voice, "Your Highness, I would like to eat flower cakes."
Hmm? There are no cooks from the manor here, only me.
So she finally found out that I made the flower cakes!
I couldn't help but laugh, but tears welled up in my eyes as I laughed. I quickly replied that I would make it for her when I got back.
But for a very long time, I never heard those gentle whispers that I had been so happy with again.
Then I knew that I would never hear it again.
I know that I will never make flower cakes again from now on.
I took out a lucky charm and continued to pray for her safety.
But the wind on the mountaintop was really cold at night; it felt as if my very bones and blood had been frozen solid.
I could only approach her to try and warm myself, to try and reclaim the warmth that I had finally regained over the past ten years.
But in the end, all I could manage was a hoarse voice, and with all my might, I whispered:
I love you.
Song Leyuan loves you.
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[Rest assured, as long as I'm here, no one can harm your parents and elder sister! However, you must live to be a hundred in your next life, otherwise, I will have to break my promise!]
—To Song Leyuan
Humans are strange. Even when they have everything, they can still crave a tenderness that doesn't belong to them exclusively for a moment.
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