Chapter 14 She no longer wanted to be the humble girl begging for love
The terrace on the third floor is connected to a quiet corridor. Gu Manman walked over with slightly shaky steps. The alcohol made her steps weak, but it unexpectedly gave her the courage to move forward.
The night wind ruffled her long hair. She raised her hand to comb it, but stopped when she heard the quarrel.
"Why do you want to drink wedding wine with him?" It was Feng Mingzhou's voice.
Gu Manman slowed down, moved closer to the wall, and stood in the shadow at the corner.
"It's just a boring game. I lost the dare." Lin Jinyun's voice was as sweet as honey, but with a hint of impatience. "What's the matter, Mingzhou, are you jealous?"
Gu Manman heard Feng Mingzhou sneer, and there were too many emotions hidden in that laugh - sarcasm, anger, and... a possessiveness that she was not sure about.
"You need to know your identity." Feng Mingzhou's voice was filled with anger, "Don't think I will tolerate your willfulness."
The plants in the corner cast a swaying shadow, covering Gu Manman's pale face.
She pressed her fingers against the wall.
"Oh? What is my status? Madam Feng?" Lin Jinyun laughed at herself and said, "But I haven't married you yet, Mingzhou."
"You know very well that you will be Mrs. Feng sooner or later."
These words were like a sharp blade, piercing Gu Manman's heart accurately. Blood flowed out of the wound, staining all her fantasies and hopes.
The alcohol dulled her thoughts, but it couldn't numb her pain.
Her hand unconsciously rose and pressed against her heart, as if that could stop the invisible wound.
"Mingzhou, look at me," Lin Jinyun's voice suddenly rose, "Do you care about me?"
"It's funny, it's really funny." Her voice dropped, with a sobbing tone, "You have Gu Manman, but who am I drinking with? What right do you have to question me?"
"I told you that you are the woman of the Feng family. If you drink the wedding wine with another man, you are slapping me in the face."
Gu Manman's curiosity and jealousy drove her to take a step forward.
The scene on the terrace came into view clearly - Feng Mingzhou had trapped Lin Jinyun on the terrace railing, his arms resting on both sides of her body, trapping her entirely in his shadow.
"Ming Zhou, you love me, right?" Lin Jinyun asked.
"Mingzhou, I know you love me."
Gu Manman stood there and did not hear Feng Mingzhou's answer.
He didn't deny it.
No denial.
In an instant, five years of memories came flooding back like a tide - their first meeting, her companionship day and night when he was blind, the promise he made after he regained his sight...
Everything became pale and powerless.
Gu Manman suddenly felt like a voyeur, ridiculous and pathetic.
She took a soundless step back, then two.
Gu Manman did not stop. She didn't dare, and she couldn't.
She was afraid that once she stopped and turned around, she would see Feng Mingzhou, who looked apologetic but determined, and Lin Jinyun, who looked like a winner.
Gu Manman felt as if someone was gripping her heart tightly, and the sharp pain surged from her heart to her limbs like a tide.
Her ears were buzzing and the whole world was silent, leaving only her own disordered breathing and thundering heartbeat hammering against her eardrums.
The picture was so clear, every detail was so dazzling and so suffocating.
She would rather spend her whole life avoiding such scenes.
Gu Manman slammed the taxi door, tears welling up in her eyes uncontrollably.
"Miss, are you okay?" The driver glanced at her in the rearview mirror with concern in his tone.
"Just drive." Her voice was so hoarse that she couldn't recognize it.
The taxi turned a corner and Gu Manman's head hit the window, but she didn't even feel the pain.
The pain of her heart being crushed repeatedly had paralyzed her nerves.
After arriving home, she stood blankly in the entrance hall without even turning on the lights.
Snowball rubbed over and circled around her ankles, making a soft purring sound.
Gu Manman mechanically bent down, picked it up, and buried her face in its soft fur.
"It's okay, it's okay." She didn't know whether she was comforting Snowball or herself.
She walked to the bedroom with heavy steps, turned on the light, and her eyes fell on the photo of her and Feng Mingzhou on the bedside table.
In the photo, they were on the top of a mountain. She was smiling like a child and his eyes were full of doting.
Gu Manman grabbed the photo frame and smashed it to the ground.
Glass shards flew everywhere, cutting her ankle and causing blood to flow down the back of her foot, but she felt no pain.
"Enough, it's really enough." She said with trembling lips.
Everything had been foreshadowed.
The appearance of Lin Jinyun, Feng Mingzhou's indifference, the fake scene of pushing people into the lake, and his favoritism.
Gu Manman dragged her tired body to the desk, took out her cell phone, and found the number of her good friend Su Yu.
She hesitated for a few seconds, and finally pressed the dial button.
"Hello? Manman? Why are you calling so late? What happened?" Su Yu asked.
"Su Yu, the job opportunity abroad that you mentioned before...is it still available?" Gu Manman tried to make her voice sound calm.
"Of course, you are welcome at Phillips Editorial Office. You can come over anytime. Wait... are you..."
"I've decided to accept this opportunity." Gu Manman interrupted her, her tone firm, "I'll be there in a month at the latest."
There was silence on the other end of the phone for a few seconds.
"What happened?"
Gu Manman didn't answer, but just sniffed.
"Okay, stop talking. I understand. I'll arrange it right away. Just let me know if you need any help."
After hanging up the phone, Gu Manman stood in front of the window, looking at the city lights in the distance.
She once thought those lights represented hope and the future, but now they seem to be nothing more than moths in the flames, the closer they get, the more they will be burned.
Her eyes swept across the room, a place that held so many memories.
Every corner seems to bear Feng Mingzhou's mark.
The books he often reads on the bookshelf, his clothes in the closet, the cups he often uses in the kitchen...
Pain is temporary, but self-esteem is a lifelong thing.
She didn't want to be the girl who begged for love humbly anymore.
Snowball squatted beside the suitcase and tilted his head to look at her. He gave a soft cry and jumped onto her knees.
"You want to go with me too, okay?" Gu Manman asked softly, stroking its fur.
Snowball rubbed her palm as if responding to her.
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