Chapter 43 Heartbreak: "I can be fine without her."
After Lu Wenjin's group sped away, the scouts who had followed Jinlian's directions had no choice but to leave dejectedly. They didn't bring anyone back, and they were all worried about whether Ningxian in the North would let them off the hook.
One of them pulled on the reins, turned the horse around, and bent down to pick up the jade hairpin buried in the mud.
The hairpin shattered into pieces, seemingly beyond repair, but after blowing away the dust, the man carefully placed the jade hairpin back into his bosom.
......
Where are they?
A week later, the scout returned to the North. It was late at night when he arrived at the Xuanli Hall. The moon was hidden by dark clouds, and all was quiet. He held the broken hairpin in his hand and walked up to Ning Xian.
He presented it with both hands, his heart pounding faster and faster: "Your subordinate is incompetent; I failed to bring the lady back, and only managed to retrieve this."
The candles on the table had burned out sometime ago, and only the cold moonlight shone in from behind the man. There was a long silence in the hall. Where the scouts could not see, Ning Xian lowered his hand that was supporting his cheek and lazily opened his eyes.
Perhaps it was the moonlight, but two faint bluish-black streaks appeared beneath the man's raven-feather-like eyelashes, and his dark pupils were surrounded by bloodshot veins. As he looked at the broken hairpin, his vow to kill Ruan Yang suddenly vanished by more than half.
This hairpin was carved by his own hands for her. He spent months painstakingly transforming the small piece of jade into a lifelike kitten. But now she says she doesn't want it anymore.
Ruan Yang didn't love him. Even though he forced her to be intimate with him every day, he still couldn't feel happy at all.
The girl's tenderness and affection almost fooled him. He knew all along that it was a spoiled candy, but he still couldn't help but be greedy for it.
Ning Xian recalled Ruan Yang's obedient and docile demeanor in front of him and gave a soft sneer.
He was gambling that she would pity him, forgive him, and ultimately stay willingly.
But the result is obvious.
The weight that had been hanging over his heart for so long finally lifted today, and he could finally stop living in the lies he had woven for himself.
Ning Xian had been in the Xuanli Hall for several hours. When he stood up, he was a little unsteady on his feet. The young man swayed slightly, but immediately stood up straight. The vulnerability that had been inadvertently exposed just now vanished in an instant.
There are plenty of women in this world who would flock to him and do everything in their power to please him; he could live a good life without Ruan Yang.
There will also be a lot of love.
He sighed, "The hairpin is broken and useless now, just throw it away."
"I'm so sleepy, I'm going to bed."
The scout stood there dumbfounded for a long time when he saw Ning Xian walk past him so casually.
He had come here with the courage to be tortured, but Ning Xian's unusual calmness sent a chill down his spine.
He looked up and saw Ning Xian suddenly stop at the door, his slender fingers gripping the door frame tightly, as if he was enduring something. Strands of hair on the boy's back slowly slid to the side, followed by a muffled groan, and a pool of bright red liquid splashed on the ground.
The scout was shocked. He rushed over and caught Ning Xian as he fell. The young man's brows were furrowed, and tears occasionally welled up in his bloodshot eyes: "Your Highness!"
"...Help! Someone come quick!"
......
The mansion was instantly brightly lit, and the room was bustling with activity. The doctor had just examined Ning Xian and said that she had vomited blood because she was too heartbroken and had been too worried about her official duties.
Ning Xian fell ill, and the concubines Ruan Yang had taken in for him knelt before his bed to serve him. Lan Rong, who was busy with half of the work, saw Jin Lian crying and kicked her, signaling her to be quiet.
"You few stay here and keep watch, I'll go and brew medicine for His Highness."
Jinlian nodded, biting her handkerchief to suppress her sobs.
She secured her own survival by betraying Ruan Yang, but she had already told everyone she knew, so she seemed to have no further use. It's unclear what Ning Xian wanted to do with her.
The incense sticks were half-burned, the curtains swayed slightly, Ning Xian coughed a few times, opened her eyes and found herself lying on the couch, her vision blurry and her body still weak and powerless, even speaking was difficult.
He turned his head and looked at the three people not far away in silence.
Because what he saw were three faces that resembled Ruan Yang.
One has eyes very similar to Ruan Yang's, dark and clear; another has a mouth very similar, pink and plump, seemingly very kissable; and there's Jinlian, they're similar in every way.
"......"
Ning Xian snorted and turned her back to him.
That's really mean. Not only did he leave on his own, but he also deliberately picked a few people who looked like him to annoy him.
What a slut.
"Your Highness is awake?"
Although the woman in pink was happy, she was also afraid of Ning Xian, so she did not dare to step forward and only tugged at Jinlian's sleeve slightly.
Jinlian came to her senses but didn't dare to step forward. The three of them started pushing and shoving each other, and the scene became quite awkward.
Ning Xian: "......"
"Why is everyone so far away from me?"
The three of them suddenly fell silent, and each of them even pressed their foreheads to the floor.
Ning Xian frowned: "If you don't say anything, I'm going to get angry."
The woman in pink stammered, "We...we dare not offend Your Highness..."
Ning Xian glanced at her, and after a long while, she said, "That's right, only that woman would dare to treat me so badly."
She gave him a drug that could kill him, secretly put sterilization drugs in the soup she cooked for him, and even before she left, she added a drug to the pastries she made.
Ning Xian muttered to herself, "I'm clearly not fierce at all, so I don't know why none of you want to talk to me..."
When he had free time, he would talk to his attendants, who would only respond with a few simple words like "uh-huh" or "oh-oh".
"Perhaps Your Highness is just too serious on a regular basis. If you smile more, you might be able to do a better job."
Ning Xian moved her stiff lips: "Then how was I treated by your wife? Was I also very fierce?"
The woman in the pink shirt hesitated for a moment, then nodded.
Ning Xian was very dissatisfied with this answer and snorted, "Why are you siding with her too?"
"Fine, you stay. Everyone else, go down."
Jinlian didn't react at first, but after confirming that Ning Xian was calling her, she went over tremblingly.
"What's wrong?"
Ning Xian asked, "Who came up with that ingenious idea?"
Jinlian said, "It was Madam who told me to do this. If I didn't agree, she would kill me."
"real?"
"Absolutely true!"
Ning Xian chuckled: "Oh, then you're quite pitiful."
After saying that, he casually added, "Fine, I won't scold you anymore. You can stay by my side and serve me from now on."
Jinlian was stunned: "Me? This..."
Ning Xian rested her head on her elbow, and a wicked idea popped into her head again: "Yes, it's you. From now on, I'll treat you the same way I treat Ruan Yang."
"You can go and rest now. Remember to come and serve me in bed tomorrow."
Jinlian was completely bewildered, never expecting Ning Xian to answer like that. Did serving him in bed mean he wanted to take her as a concubine...?
Upon seeing Lan Rong arrive, Jinlian, fearing she would be reprimanded without cause, said, "Then this servant will take her leave for now."
Lan Rong put down the medicine and said in surprise, "Your Highness, are you going to take Jinlian into your own room? I think that girl has impure thoughts. Once she becomes a mistress, who knows what kind of trouble she will cause."
Ning Xian buried himself in the quilt and said, "With me here, what trouble can Jinlian cause? As you said, I know she's no good either. With that face that resembles Ruan Yang's, she's clearly defiling Ruan Yang."
"She chose this path herself. No matter how glamorous she appears on the surface, she will regret it in private."
Lan Rong smiled and said, "It's good that Your Highness understands."
After she finished speaking, she lit the incense burner. Suddenly, she heard Ning Xian say, "Lan Rong, do you think Ruan Yang will regret what I did?"
Lan Rong was taken aback and asked in confusion, "What...could she regret?"
He closed his eyes and said, "You regret putting me in someone else's bed, you regret leaving me and choosing Lu Wenjin."
Lan Rong sighed. She didn't dare tell him that if someone doesn't love you, no matter how much you throw a tantrum or try to please them, they won't feel anything for you.
But that's fine too. Ning Xian has found someone new, so maybe he'll really forget about the old ones.
She said, "Perhaps...it will."
......
Bashu (Sichuan and Chongqing)
Ruan Yang saw and heard Lu's mother and Lu Yan's furtive actions at the door and their conversation.
She put her tattered shoes and socks back on, pushed open the door and walked up to the two of them: "Thank you for taking me in, but I am an outsider and I married young, so it is not appropriate for me to stay here for long."
"I hope Auntie can have someone tell the kitchen that they don't need to cook for me."
The girl's hair was disheveled, and her clothes were stained with mud and blood, but her face was spotless. Her skin was as white as porcelain, and her lips were as red as pomegranates. She stood quietly in the wind, and even in simple clothes, her beauty could not be hidden.
Mother Lu rubbed her eyes, and after confirming that the girl in front of her was indeed Ruan Yang, whom she had not seen for five years, she was overjoyed. She held Ruan Yang's shoulder, tears welling up in her eyes. This was the girl she had been longing for for three years.
Overjoyed, she wept, "It's good you're back, it's good you're back. Good girl, I understood your difficulties back then. Don't worry, our Lu family doesn't care whether you've been married before."
"You're not healthy, so don't stand in the wind. Let's go inside and sit down."
Ruan Yang was somewhat flattered. Back then, she had broken off the engagement and said such hurtful things to Lu Wenjin. The Lu family should hate her to death.
"No need, Auntie, I really have to go."
Ruan Yang shook her head, forcefully pulled her hand away, and immediately ran out, lifting her skirt.
A fragrant breeze swept by, and Lu Yan looked at Ruan Yang's head bowed and tears streaming down her face, saying, "It really is my ex-sister-in-law. But it seems they've had another fight. I wonder who's bullying whom this time."
Mother Lu knew in her heart that her son was deeply in love with Ruan Yang and could not live without her. He had started from scratch and suffered too much ridicule and humiliation for many years, all so that one day he could be a match for the second young lady of the Jiedushi's family.
She said to Lu Yan, "Lu Yan, go and tell your brother to bring Yangyang back."
"Okay, I'll go right away!"
...
Ruan Yang ran out of the Lu residence. There were still quite a few onlookers in front of the two stone lion gates. She wiped her tears with her sleeve and quickly left.
Once a decision is made, it cannot be easily reversed. Although Ruan Yang was tempted, she did not want to act recklessly. She knew that there was a nunnery in the deep mountains across the river. Going there would allow her to cut off the noise of the world and forget her worries.
Jizhao Temple is nestled in a lush forest. To reach it, one must first take a boat for half an hour, and then walk up a long, blue stone staircase.
In late spring, the mountain springs gurgled and the orioles sang sweetly. When she arrived at Jizhao Nunnery, Ruan Yang looked up at the words on the plaque and knocked on the door without hesitation.
Now that things have come to this, she is willing to shave her head and become a nun, severing all worldly ties and cutting off any improper thoughts she may have. From now on, Xiao Lang will be a stranger to her...
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