My eldest brother got married. His Majesty arranged the marriage. He felt that this marriage was a disgrace to him because the other party was just a merchant’s daughter. But I heard that he arranged the marriage himself.
Everyone in the capital knew that my eldest brother was interested in Liu Miaoqing, the daughter of the Minister of the Central Secretariat. Your Majesty could have chosen someone else, but in order to please Him, he married her.
I have seen countless women with good looks and nice figures. I could tell at a glance that the girl was extremely beautiful. In fact, she looked no worse than Liu Miaoqing, who was known as the best beauty in the capital. She was just a little young and her appearance had not fully developed yet. I don't know what she would look like in a year or two.
Su Juan's personality is also very interesting. She likes listening to music and looking at beauties just like me. She often drags me to Baihua Tower and wants to go to Chunxiang Tower, but I will never go to Chunxiang Tower again.
Whenever I think of Chunxianglou, my waist starts to ache. I really can't afford to lose face like this.
Su Juan is a very good person, but my eldest brother is not a sensible person and wants everything. But the Liu family girl also looks down on him. I have met Liu Miaoqing several times. She is a very opinionated girl. Her mind and ambition are not above romance, otherwise she should have married Liu Xuan many years ago.
In fact, I have liked my eldest brother since I was a child and always wanted to be close to him, but he didn't like me very much.
Whether it's calligraphy, reading, or writing articles, he gets unhappy whenever I stand out.
But when I was a child, he was also an elder brother who took good care of me and blocked a lot of scolding for me. I just don’t know when we became distant.
I started to stop trying to be the best in everything and wanted to repair our brotherly relationship, but he still distanced himself from me and his temper became more and more weird, so much so that I was secretly afraid of him and always felt that he had become a different person.
Su Juan tricked me into copying the "Female Commandments" for her. I couldn't stand those bad ideas, but my eldest brother made her copy them as a punishment.
That day, I was still worried that since I had been learning calligraphy with my elder brother since I was a child, he would definitely be able to tell what my handwriting was like, just like I could also tell his handwriting.
But a few days later, he didn't show any abnormality and didn't recognize that it was my handwriting at all.
I learned from Su Juan that day that my elder brother wanted to kill me. I didn't believe it at all, but all the signs showed that my elder brother had no brotherly love for me at all. He didn't even have his father and mother in his heart, only power. He wanted to fight for that position because the current emperor had no children of his own.
I went from disbelief to fear. No one wants to die, so I began to plan to move out of the palace.
On New Year's Eve, our family went to the palace for a banquet. Su Juan wore new clothes made of the material that the Queen had given her before. It was very beautiful. No noble lady in the capital had this material, which showed that the Queen liked her very much.
Half a year later, she had grown taller and her facial features had grown more delicate. Her fair face looked rosy from the makeup she put on, and her lips were painted with lip balm.
It seems that I was not wrong at the beginning. When her facial features grew up, she became a real beauty.
Her father had been hinting to her that he wanted to ask for the warm clothes, but she was only thinking about entering the palace and the food there.
My father said that I don’t understand him, but I think, he doesn’t say a word, who can I expect to understand him?
With Su Juan's personality, if you don't speak directly to her, she will be too lazy to figure it out and think it's troublesome.
When we arrived at the palace, it was already dark. The first snow on New Year's Eve was very beautiful.
When she got off the carriage, she didn't stand firmly and bumped into me. I bent down and picked up the umbrella on the ground and held it up for her. "It's okay."
After all, I don’t have the same temper as my eldest brother, and I won’t lose my temper easily.
She actually has some little girlish nature, and she would reach out to catch the snowflakes, [which is really pretty. ]
I also looked over there. The red palace walls and the falling snow made me feel a little excited. It was indeed beautiful.
This is the first snow of the year, but I'm actually talking about her. She is beautiful.
When I saw my eldest brother getting off the carriage, I subconsciously let go of the umbrella and left it to the maid beside her. I took two steps away from her and could still hear her sighing: "There are not many days like this left."
After getting off the carriage, my eldest brother stared at Su Juan for a long time. I knew that he was a little lost in thought. He probably didn't expect that this wife whom he had thrown into the house and neglected since marrying her was actually very beautiful.
But the eldest brother couldn't appreciate it at all. He was obviously fascinated by it, but he still couldn't help but mock it, saying, "It's wrapped like a bear, so ugly."
[I am ugly, I am ugly, it is none of your business! ]
I frowned and couldn't help but say, "It's not ugly, it's very beautiful."
Su Juan looked at me with a more relaxed look in her eyes. "You are a good person. You can't follow your brother's example. There is no future for you."
I thought to myself, my elder brother and I are naturally different.
As I walked away, I could still hear faint sounds coming from behind me.
Su Juan: "Dongdong, do you think the Second Young Master has been acting strange lately?"
Dong Dong: "The Second Young Master has been talking less recently, and he doesn't come to play cards with the Master very often."
[What happened to Song Qianhang? Why did his temperament change so drastically? ]
[Don't they say that only a serious illness or some fatal pain will cause a drastic change in temperament? ]
[He spends his days either reading or visiting brothels. Could it be that he has become ill from reading too much? ]
I couldn't help but scream in my heart: Didn't you say that I would be poisoned to death! ?
If I don't take some precautions, am I just going to wait for death?
I spent money to hire someone to follow my eldest brother, and I'm also looking for a new house outside. I don't have much money left, so how can I spend it in places like Baihua Tower?
A lot of things happened on New Year's Eve, both inside the palace and outside the palace, but what frightened me the most was myself.
She was drunk and my eldest brother was left in the palace, which made my mother angry. My father asked me to send her back home first.
I originally wanted to send her to the outside of the yard, but she was so drunk that even the maid couldn't help her, and she was about to hit the door. I had to go forward to help her and send her back to the yard.
After finally helping her to bed, the maid hurried to the small kitchen to cook some sobering soup.
I sat in the yard for a while. So many things happened tonight that my mind was in a mess. It was all related to my eldest brother. My eldest brother did have the ambition to compete for the throne, but I didn't understand why he wanted to poison me, his younger brother?
Nowadays I don't like reading. I spend all day visiting brothels, music halls, drinking and having fun. How could I pose any threat to him? Why would he want to kill myself?
I couldn't figure it out, and just as I stood up to leave, the drunk Su Juan stumbled out of the room, his fox fur coat draped loosely on his body, muttering something.
I watched her running in the snow, her little face was red and she was laughing as she ran. I really didn't expect her to look like this after being drunk.
I was afraid that she would run out to the yard, so I stepped forward to dissuade her and blocked her way, "Sister-in-law, it's windy outside, go back to the house!"
But she suddenly reached out, hooked my collar and pulled me over. She was so strong that she didn't look like an ordinary lady at all!
I watched her approach me, her eyes wide open, smiling as she looked at me. Her beautiful eyes gradually filled with smiles.
"The young man is also very handsome."
Her frivolous drunken words made my heart beat wildly.
The snow was getting heavier and heavier, and the fox fur coat on her body had slipped quietly into the snow without her knowing when. Her fingertips were cold and her face turned red.
Just when I was thinking about something romantic, she reached out and covered my face to keep warm, but it was so cold that I grimaced: "!!!"'
It’s going to cost you your life!
How could a girl's hands be so cold, like ice!
"Tell me! How much for one night with me?"
My face turned black, I pulled her hand down and stood firm, "I won't sell myself!"
Su Juan was silent for a long time. I thought she had calmed down, but she suddenly said, "Don't worry, I'm the Crown Prince's Consort. I have a lot of money!"
As she spoke, she patted her chest to show that she was really generous and would give as much as anyone wanted.
[Follow me, I will steal Song Qianfan's money to support you! ]
I couldn't help being irritable: ""
It's not about money.
I am a person with a bottom line. Although I love beautiful women, I don’t covet married women, let alone that person is my sister-in-law.
She squatted on the ground and cried sadly. Sometimes she cried that she was an orphan and just wanted a family. Sometimes she cried that she was a living widow, living under someone else's roof, with no love or care from her husband, and having to live her life depending on her mother-in-law's mood. Sometimes she cried that she was already very unfortunate, but still had to save the world.
I was confused and at the same time felt a little pity for her.
After all, her family didn't love her, she had no one to close to her in the palace, and her husband was worse than a maid.
I sighed, picked up the fox fur on the ground, shook off the snow on it, and covered her with it, "Don't cry."
"Am I not your family?"
After hearing what I said, she looked up at me with red eyes, looking so pitiful.
But the next second, she ripped off the Buddhist beads in my hand, which I had prayed for in the temple to save my life.
Never mind, just give it to her.
I hid in the corner and waited for the maid to come back with the sobering soup, feeling relieved.
I wanted to leave, but I couldn't help looking back. Scenes of her reaching out to catch the snow and smiling appeared in my mind.
I feel like I might be sick, and pretty sick.
Because that night, I built a so-called snowman for her in the snow to please her.
The next day, I caught a cold and asked a doctor to come to my house.
Su Juan had no recollection of what happened last night, and even thought that the snowman I built in the yard in the snow and wind was very shabby. Looking at her wrist wearing the Buddhist beads that she had snatched from me last night, I felt a strange feeling in my heart that I couldn't explain.
When I saw my eldest brother, I felt uneasy, afraid that he would know what happened last night.
Since that day, I subconsciously started to avoid Su Juan, because I would always think of her inexplicably in my mind and always dream about her at night. I have to admit that I did have some other thoughts.
Vernacular novels were popular in Beijing. There was a novel in which the story was exactly like Su Juan. The real-life characters were copied into the novel by the writer.
I also watched it that day. The content left me dumbfounded and my heart beat very fast.
Just as I was reading with great interest, Su Juan stood up and walked over to my side, glancing at the book in my hand.
[What a bunch of bullshit! ]
I was so scared that I slammed the notebook in my hand shut.
I was extremely nervous, my mind was full of the contents of the storybook, and I hurriedly poured myself two glasses of wine to calm myself down.
I am afraid that others will see the thoughts in my heart that cannot be known to others.
I know I am really sick and there is no cure.
On the day of Su Juan's divorce, I went to ask my eldest brother for the divorce papers on her behalf. I knew my eldest brother well and knew that if I didn't go and get them back in time, he would definitely continue to delay.
But what I didn't expect was that after she came back from Xuzhou, everything changed, and I didn't even have time to sort out my feelings.
I never thought that my biological father was Pei Lianshan. The entire Pei family was beheaded for the crime of treason, but I was saved.
The murder of my entire family weighed heavily on my head, and before I had the time to process it all, I was pushed onto a path of no return.
I cannot overturn the case for the Pei family, because once their background is exposed, Prince Jing's Mansion will suffer a devastating disaster, and harboring rebels will be regarded as treason.
But Su Juan said that if the situation changed one day, she would fulfill my wish and overturn the case for the Pei family.
She kept her word and finally she did it, so I was able to restore my origins, but the palace was eventually implicated because of my eldest brother's rebellion.
My eldest brother was sentenced to death, and my mother's failure to report the matter was considered treason, which should have been a capital crime. I knelt in prison for a long time and wrote a letter in blood to plead for her.
How could I forget the kindness of raising me for more than twenty years?
His Majesty finally pardoned her death sentence and she lived in Kaishan Temple with her hair uncut. However, because her son died and she was estranged from her husband, she had no more thoughts about him, so she cut her hair and refused to leave the temple again.
The king knew that he had failed to educate his children and was too ashamed to see his brothers again, so he asked to return to his fiefdom and never come back to the capital.
When I woke up, the capital city had become a completely different place. At least, my father and mother were alive, and at least the Pei family's case had been overturned.
But now in this huge capital city, I can’t go back to the palace. I live in the Pei Mansion where I’m the only one, and I’m the only one with the surname Pei.
I have nothing left, I feel empty, and I don’t even know what else I can do. I desperately want to grab onto something that I might still be able to hold onto.
But Su Juan never got a husband in the end. She had no interest in romance. I wanted it, and she always knew that I didn't need fame, wealth or status. I just wanted someone to accompany me and stay by her side, even if we didn't have a formal status, even if it was as we said at the beginning, to be a member of the family.
Now, I no longer have any so-called bottom line, nor do I need her to spend money. No matter who she is or what her identity is, I want her.
But she still didn't want to.
Many years have passed in a flash. When I heard the news of her passing, my eyes were sore. In fact, during the time we spent together in the palace, I always felt that she was not a native of this place and would leave sooner or later.
But I am not the one who can keep her. She is like a gust of wind, coming and going, leaving nothing behind.
I often think of the snowy New Year’s Eve that year. It was the most unforgettable snowfall for me and it will be a scene that I will never see again in my life.
Now I am truly the only one left in this world.
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