Chapter 52

Wen Xin half stood up to touch the little fox.

Looking up along the line of the arm, the little fox could just see Wen Xin's eyes.

It is clear and bright, like a vortex emitting soft light, which makes people fall into it unknowingly.

The little fox stared at the young man's face.

He thought that the last time he was comforted by Wen Xin like this seemed to be several months ago.

Just a few months, which is nothing to mention in the long history of mutation.

Why did he feel like that was a long time ago?

After a few seconds, the little fox seemed to suddenly wake up.

He strained his throat with difficulty, suppressed all his desire, and pushed Wen Xin's arm away.

"Have you always been this courageous?"

Perhaps it was because of his emotional ups and downs, a faint red light flashed across the little fox's eyes, and his voice involuntarily became lower.

Wen Xin saw it all and felt a completely unfamiliar pressure.

His first reaction was not fear, but remembering the incident that caused the little fox to leave.

At that time, the other person's eyes were flashing with the same red light as now.

Perhaps this is the mark of growing up left on the little fox.

Wen Xin was touched. Facing the little fox's surprised look, he said softly, "Your Holiness, please forgive me."

"If you're not happy, I'll tone it down."

Wen Xin drooped her eyelashes in disappointment, and the little fox panicked: "No, that's not what I meant."

He struggled for a while, and finally gave up and followed his inner desire, saying in a hoarse voice: "If you really want to, you can...you can hug me again."

Wen Xin was stunned, then smiled and said, "Okay, I think so."

Without hesitation, the young man walked around the stone table and towards the little fox.

Seeing the other party coming over, the little fox couldn't help but reveal an expectant look on his face.

But he suddenly thought of something and quickly stopped Wen Xin who was about to get close to him: "Wait a minute!"

Wen Xin: “?”

The little fox closed its eyes, and suddenly a layer of fine ripples appeared on the surface of its body, and its appearance changed.

His facial features gradually became more delicate, his body became shorter and smaller, and his hands and feet also shrank proportionally.

In the blink of an eye, the person standing in front of Wen Xin was no longer a middle-aged man, but a handsome young boy.

Facing Wen Xin's surprised look, the little fox explained stubbornly: "This is what I looked like when I was a child. I wasn't that tall and strong, so it was easier for you to hold me."

Wen Xin looked at the boy's face, which looked nothing like the middle-aged man: "..."

Actually, he was not unfamiliar with this face.

The little fox used this face when he used illusion for the first time and dragged him into a dream.

Apart from some differences in facial details due to age differences, they are basically identical.

I think this is the posture of the little fox's anthropomorphic body.

...are you so bold?

Wen Xin frowned and suddenly his fingers trembled.

He found that he seemed to have been thinking wrong all along.

Their little kid was not born in utopia, nor does he know nothing.

When it first arrives home, it will hide in the corner and observe secretly, and will carefully look at his and the other dumplings' expressions.

I will be cautious when Green Group is angry and I will lower my posture in front of him.

Only after making sure that he and the other members would not harm it, did he gradually become more active and unrestrained.

Could a little fox like this really be so stupid?

This time when Wen Xin walked over, the boy did not stop him. Instead, he obediently let him stand behind him.

In fact, the little fox was still a little nervous.

He remembered that he had revealed his true appearance in front of Wen Xin. Even if the other party's memory would be affected by the illusion after waking up, it was not 100% safe.

But secretly, the little fox didn't want Wen Xin to hug other people's bodies.

Just when he was feeling anxious, the young man naturally hugged him tightly from behind.

Wen Xin said hoarsely, "Thank you."

Thank you for your trust.

Thank you for your honesty.

The little fox didn't know why he suddenly said thank you, but he subconsciously felt at ease and leaned his body into the young man's arms.

He has wanted to do this for a long time.

She can be hugged by Wen Xin and talk to Wen Xin without any obstacles.

The pain from the memories no longer seems to be that painful.

Knowing that Wen Xin didn't have any doubts because he trusted him, the little fox couldn't help feeling a little guilty.

Not long after, Wen Xin heard the little fox slowly talking about the past.

Of course, people died during that period of time, and that was the source of the little fox's pain.

In fact, death is not a strange thing for the little fox.

Long before it escaped from the secret base with Canary, it had seen countless dead mutants and knew that death meant separation and never seeing each other again.

Later, the apocalypse broke out and even more lives were lost.

The human corpses were piled up in piles on the ground, and it was hard to ignore them.

At that time, the little fox had not yet evolved into its full form. It was constantly bewitched by hallucinations and would become inexplicably excited when it saw blood.

It wants to join the zombies, stretch out its sharp claws and tear everything apart. It wants the weak and disliked humans to lie at its feet, struggling desperately and dying bit by bit.

The little fox knew that was wrong, but he just wanted to do it.

Whenever the desire to kill was overwhelmed, the little fox would take out the warm pieces of clothing and canary feathers and bite them in his mouth.

Biting the warm pieces of clothing, the little fox would imagine the young man standing before him.

Hold it with your skinny but not frail body to protect it from the bloody scenes.

Biting the canary's feathers, the little fox would recall the time when the blond boy almost died under its claws.

This served as a warning, and in infinite regret, he broke free from the shackles of the desire to kill.

Relying on these two things, the little fox persisted for a long time.

Just as it had promised the canary, it found a deserted place.

It was a city ravaged by war.

There were too many zombies, so people had to use heavy firepower to prevent the virus from spreading further.

The air was filled with the smell of gunpowder and the burnt smell of corpses.

The little fox was very satisfied with this place.

But then, another problem was put in front of it.

In the little fox's expectation, it would seal itself up and would not run out of control and harm others.

That would require a room that cannot be opened from the inside.

It's hard to imagine that you can lock it yourself but you can't open it yourself.

The little fox tried many times.

Block the door with enough furniture, tie the door tightly with finger-thick wire, or lock yourself in the closet.

But in the end, they will all be opened by its claws.

Looking at the messy little fox on the ground: "..."

It's so annoying.

Days passed, and the little fox still didn't find a way to seal himself up.

But its transformation is increasing day by day.

Its strength is gradually increasing, its claws and teeth are becoming sharper, and the skin under its fur seems to be covered with an invisible hard film, which feels soft to the touch but is actually very hard.

Once it huddled in a room and was unfortunately hit by human artillery/fire, leaving no trace at all.

This change surprised the little fox. Even if it fought with the scaled viper again, it would not necessarily be at a disadvantage.

But at the same time, the anger in the little fox's heart was infinitely magnified.

The genetic disorder is no longer fatal, but the pain remains.

Like a thorn in the flesh, it tortured the little fox's will all the time.

It starts to become unlike itself.

He would suddenly lose control and go crazy, and after waking up he would be bewildered looking at the destroyed ruins.

My memory would suddenly become confused and I would not be able to remember where I had put my clothes, fabrics and feathers.

It was not until it searched frantically for a long time that it found a small pile of cloth scraps and a bare feather tube in a small box buried in the soil.

At that time, artillery fire spread, gunshots continued, and intertwined with the roars of the zombies, as if there would never be an end.

The little fox clung to the edge of the box, staring blankly at the pile of debris and feathers.

Tears suddenly filled his eyes, which had never been moistened even by the artillery fire.

Grievances are like a volcanic eruption, covering the sky and the earth.

The little fox was sobbing and wanted to ignore everything and run home directly.

But it knew it couldn't. In its current state, going back would only bring disaster to everyone.

It still has to endure and continue to persevere.

…

The little fox did not forget to invent a new identity for himself.

But the moment he finished speaking, he couldn't help it. He turned around quickly and hugged Wen Xin even tighter, with an almost inaudible tremor in his voice.

"Let me hold you for a while... just for a while."

Wen Xin looked down at the trembling boy in his arms.

Since we met, I seem to have an explanation for the little fox's particularly clingy behavior and the fact that his eyes get wet all the time.

If possible, Wen Xin would like to go back to the past and hold the helpless little fox in his arms.

But reality is not an illusion, there is no such possibility.

He rubbed the boy's hair with concern: "It's okay, it's okay, it's all over."

Their little kid Xiaoqi really suffered a lot of injustice.

The little fox hesitated for a long time before he raised his face from Wen Xin's arms embarrassedly.

Fortunately, this was a dream, and his tears would not really stain the young man's clothes.

He said hoarsely, "Actually, I had only known the dead man for a few days."

Wen Xin reacted.

[The dead person] should be connected with the [lot of blood shed] mentioned earlier.

Considering that the little fox only recalled this memory after seeing the painting, it is very likely that the person who died was the middle-aged man in the painting.

Is that person already dead?

Wen Xin frowned, suppressed the sigh in his heart, and didn't show it on his face.

小狐貍說：“奉命清理那片地方的人封鎖了來往的通道，他逃不出去，東西也吃完了，誤打誤撞闖進了我睡覺的地方。”

“我以為他是不懷好意的小偷，就想趕他走。他可憐地央求我，說自己要是現在出去，只有死路一條。”

“可我還是想趕走他，當時我的脾氣非常不好，他死在我身邊的可能性，比他死在外面的炮火中更大。”

“直到他跟我說，他還有想等的人沒有等到，還不能這樣輕易地死去。”

說出這句話的時候，中年人的眼中迸發了一抹名為期頤的情緒，一下子就觸動了殺意暴漲的小狐貍。

它又何嘗不是在苦苦地支撐着，等待着回家的日子？

一人一狐的心産生了強烈的共鳴。

但他們的關系并沒有因此變得親密起來。

畢竟小狐貍還是想要殺人、吃變異體。

而中年人也畏懼于小狐貍超乎尋常的力量，不敢在它失控的時候靠近。

那段時間，小狐貍和中年人寥寥聊過兩次。

第一次中年人聊到了自己想等的人，他的老婆還有女兒。

末世爆發之前兩人正好回家探親，險之又險地避開了當地的喪屍潮。

中年人不無慶幸地說：“我也是躲在教堂的儲藏室裏才躲過去的，喪屍力量連鐵制的防盜門都抵抗不住，幸好她們已經走了。”

“鄉下沒有那麽多人，一定會比這裏安全，她們一定都還活着。等到這裏的大清洗結束之後，我就去找她們，一定可以找得到。”

當時的小狐貍，心裏存在着和中年人一樣的想法。

它想着大家一定會沒事，溫辛也一定會活着。

沒有注意到中年人神情恍惚，語氣近乎神經質，反反複複地在“一定”兩個字上下了重音。

第二次對話時，小狐貍離進化為完全體只差那麽一點。

雖說它的腦子好像出了一點問題，只要沒有控制住，就會不小心變成另一只比較殘暴的狐貍。

但小狐貍可不管這麽多。

它好不容易熬出來，全身心都沉入在即将回家的喜悅中，連帶着對中年人的态度都好了不少。

也是這一次的對話，小狐貍從中年人嘴裏了解到宗教的影響力。

中年人充滿虔誠地說：“信仰給予人無窮無盡的意志力，只要有了信仰，人們就會不由自主地去追随光明，會在任何困苦艱險的環境下也能堅持下去。”

小狐貍沒怎麽聽進去，卻注意到了關鍵的問題。

“信仰你們這個什麽教的人多不多呀？”

因為受到本性的影響，多數時間，小狐貍都會陰恻恻地盯着人的喉嚨看。

中年人第一次被它用這麽友好的态度問話，受寵若驚地回答：“當然多，非常多。”

他看着小狐貍若有所思的模樣，以為是自己剛才的那一番話打動了對方，下意識就要提出邀請。

卻沒想到，小狐貍突發奇想地說道：“那我也要創立一個宗教，名字就叫溫辛教！”

人越多，找到溫辛的可能性就越大。

多好！

聽到這語出驚人的一句話，中年人差點一頭栽倒在地上去。

知道小狐貍成立溫辛教，只為借着影響力找人之後，他更是汗顏。

“成立宗教沒有那麽簡單，比如說，你得去布教傳教，還得編纂教義教條。”

于是小狐貍又知道了，成立宗教不是簡簡單單地喊一句口號就可以。

需要收服很多人讓他們信仰自己，也需要管理很多人，讓他們不能違背教義。

那對小狐貍來說也算不上複雜，畢竟它能夠使用幻術。

只要在教徒的心裏下達一個暗示，就會有成群結隊的人跟着自己。

但是小狐貍的心很小。

小到只想要找到溫辛，找到金絲雀，後面再和大家聚在一起，快快樂樂地過下去，再也不分開。

除此以外，就再也放不下其他的東西了。

小狐貍對成立宗教突然喪失了興趣，專心致志地對抗自己的本性。

這期間，或許是看中年人沒有被小狐貍吃掉，又發現喪屍會主動繞過這片地帶，更多的人類壯着膽子偷偷摸摸地住了過來。

小狐貍非常争氣，本性對它的影響力越來越小，它也就對這些人類睜一只眼閉一只眼。

它成功進化成完全體的那一天，正好也是人類宣布大清洗結束，對外封鎖路線全面解除的最後一天。

小狐貍清醒時，聽到了外面傳來了喇叭聲。

聲音振聾發聩，飽含着喜悅與激動。

“我們終于挺過了這一次的難關，無論是那些逝去的戰士，還是努力活到今天的我們，都是這片土地上的英雄——”

小狐貍知道這裏的人們只是暫時地安全了，真正的災難還沒有結束。

進化為完全體的它，已經有了S級的實力，可以清楚感應到大量喪屍環繞在這座城市的周遭。

但它還是被喇叭裏的語氣所感染，心情跟着雀躍起來。

不為別的，只為它也度過了自己的難關，可以放心地去尋找溫辛，尋找大家。

這樣激動了好一會兒，小狐貍突然發現，中年人不見了。

不在感應範圍內，也找不到屍體。

直到某個姓石的老大爺看它找得焦急，鼓起勇氣告訴它。

原來中年人離開，是因為救援的部隊到了，對方急匆匆地跑去打聽了點消息。

“當時他話都沒聽完，就開始又叫又吼，推開人一個勁兒地往前跑……可能沒有聽到自己想聽的消息。”

石大爺說：“剛才他回來，看着冷靜了一點……又去了天臺。”

天臺，也就是樓上最頂層的露天陽臺。

可是為什麽要去那？

如果是末世之前，小狐貍會很喜歡和溫辛去天臺，大多數時間溫辛都是帶金絲雀過去，因為金絲雀喜歡高處。

從高處望下去，地上的人類會變得特別小，整座城市的風景凝縮成一幅美麗的畫卷，一覽無遺。

但是末世之後，到處都已經看不到那樣的風景。

小狐貍站在高處低下頭，能看到的只有瘡痍的土地。

那些又沒有什麽好看的。

帶着疑問，小狐貍去了天臺。

地方有點遠。

它頓時更加疑惑了。

明明天臺到處都有，為什麽中年人非要挑選一個特別遠的高樓？

直至看見那一道坐在夕陽下相當頹喪的背影，小狐貍才逐漸産生出一種不好的預感。

它叫了一聲，想要提醒中年人從陽臺邊緣上下來。

那個位置很危險，人類的反應不像變異體那麽快，很容易就會掉下去。

會死的。

聽到它的聲音，中年人轉過頭來，勉強對它露出來了一個微笑：“你來了。”

接下來中年人要說的話，都成了小狐貍突然讀不懂的語言。

“其實，新聞播報她們那裏出現狂犬病毒患者的時候，我就已經有預感了。”

“之後我給她們打電話，沒人接。我又給住在同一個村裏的親戚打電話，也沒人接。朋友告訴我，她們可能是出事了，但是我不相信。”

“明明我們這裏的情況比她們那危急得更多，為什麽我們這裏可以守住，她們那裏卻不行？”

中年人說着說着，眼淚就掉了下來，一張飽經風霜的臉上滿是悲涼。

他對發呆的小狐貍說：“對不起，我騙了你，一切都是我的妄想，我早就沒有可以等待的人了。”

“可是，我真的好想，好想再見她們一面啊……”

中年人在陽臺邊緣站起身來，腳跟着往前靠了一步。

那一步，讓小狐貍的心髒頓時發緊，它脫口而出：“我可以讓你見到她們！”

中年人愣住了。

盡管知道不太可能，剎那間，他的眼中仍舊爆發出無限的喜悅。

……

可溫辛知道，人死不能複生。

小狐貍說的見到，應該就是構造出幻境。

但據溫辛曾經的體驗，小狐貍無法構造出自己無法想象的場景。

它只能從中年人的記憶或幻想裏抽取一部分，再重現于中年人的面前。

對中年人來說，輕易就能分辨出真假。

所以，當小狐貍說“他看過了之後，還是跳了下去”時，溫辛并不意外。

只是連他聽着都有些難受了，何況當時還在現場的小狐貍？

“那不是你的錯。”

溫辛摟着小狐貍，揉揉他的腦袋：“他失去了活下去的希望，不管你做什麽，他都很難再活下來。”

豈料小狐貍卻搖了搖頭，聲線沙啞：“他是有可能活下來的。”

中年人跳下去之後，小狐貍跟着追了下去。

它已經是S級的變異體，這樣的高度對它來說完全不致命。

但它才剛剛晉級，還不能很好地使用自己的力量。

接住了中年人之後，它只記得幫人墊一下，卻不知道要卸掉對方從高樓墜落的沖擊力。

有小狐貍的身體做緩沖墊，中年人沒有立刻死，卻也活不長了。

那副名為教皇的畫，是唯心教的起源。

中年人的血流了一地，他掙紮着靠牆坐了起來，身後是血色殘陽。

"You are incomparably strong. If it were you, you could establish a religion and eliminate people's... despair..."

"But you can't... use it directly. That name will bring disaster to the people you care about..."

"Wen Xin... Idealism, use idealism, this is good..."

The little fox closed his eyes.

"He said I could dispel people's despair. I tried it and it wasn't that hard."

"It's really not difficult." The little fox said softly, "But I didn't think of it before he jumped off the building."

"Why didn't I think of that?"

Wen Xin felt a pain in her heart when she heard him doubting himself.

Before I could comfort him, the little fox spoke again.

"Since then, the number of people who joined Idealism has increased, and the number of deaths has decreased. But I often think of the way he died, and I can't help but feel scared."

Wen Xin asked him softly, "What are you afraid of?"

The little fox was in a trance.

Hearing this, he seemed to be suddenly awakened from a nightmare and looked at the young man stupidly.

He buried his head in Wen Xin's arms again and murmured fondly, "I'm not afraid anymore now."

Humans are fragile.

For a long time afterwards, the little fox was afraid that he would learn the bad news about Wen Xin's accident like the middle-aged man.

It wondered whether it would lose the will to live.

Just thinking about that possibility is like someone stabbing a knife into your heart, and it hurts so much that you can't breathe.

In such a state of fear, the little fox even lost the courage to ask about Wen Xin.

It suppressed its desire tightly, naively thinking that as long as it didn't think about it or ask about it, Wen Xin would remain alive forever.

Until Wen Xin really appeared in front of it alive.

The little fox gazed greedily at Wen Xin's face.

Why was Idealism finally established?

Because he had a hope in his heart.

I hope that if I save someone, someone will lend a helping hand to Wen Xin in his despair, so that the tragedy of middle-aged people will not be repeated.

But for a period of time after establishing Idealism, he was very tired.

While being tortured by his own desires, he also has to strengthen the suggestions of his believers to prevent them from being eroded by negative emotions.

In the end, the little fox was so tired that he had no energy to do anything.

I just wanted to immerse myself in the dream and even thought about never waking up.

Wen Xin, I miss you so much...

The little fox's eyes were wet.

Really, I miss you very much.

【Author’s words】

Thank you to the little angels who voted for me or irrigated me with nutrient solution during 2023-04-30 23:58:13~2023-05-01 23:57:01~

Thanks to the little angel who threw the grenade: Feng Xingzi 1;

Thanks to the little angels who irrigated the nutrient solution: SM, Feng Xingzi 10 bottles; JCY 6 bottles; Tremella 5 bottles; Shuying, Luster Meter Gray Lake Green Rough 1 bottle;

Thank you very much for your support. I will continue to work hard!