But Yu Jingchen is now becoming increasingly persistent.
"Are you really alright?" Yu Jingchen asked her.
"It's nothing," Nan Zhiyun didn't want to say.
Fortunately... it seems he guessed something. He had always stayed by Yu Jingchen's side, and there weren't many things here that could be related to Nan Zhiyun and Yu Jingchen.
"Your Majesty, this servant remembers that Consort Jieyu met you here when she was little," Xinglai said after thinking for a moment. After all, judging from the current situation, His Majesty should be happy to hear this.
Sure enough, Yu Jingchen looked over at her.
"Have you seen me before?" Yu Jingchen asked. He really couldn't remember. Including his previous life, several decades had passed.
He turned to look at Nan Zhiyun, and seeing her expression, he knew it was true, and it wasn't easy to say. It was just... she remembered, but he had completely forgotten.
"It's been so long, I can't remember," Nan Zhiyun said, her interest waning.
Yu Jingchen paused slightly, looked at Nan Zhiyun for a while without saying anything.
"If you can't remember, then forget it," Yu Jingchen said, his voice slightly hoarse. She was avoiding him now, and he couldn't very well force her. If he did that, things would only drift further apart.
"Do you like these red plum blossoms?" Yu Jingchen asked.
“I used to like it, but now… I don’t like it that much anymore,” Nan Zhiyun said.
Yu Jingchen was taken aback. He hadn't expected Nan Zhiyun to answer like that, so he asked, "Why?"
"Feeling sorry for him?" Nan Zhiyun actually answered seriously. But this answer only made Yu Jingchen more confused.
"Feeling sorry for him?" Yu Jingchen asked.
"It breaks my heart to see it bloom alone in the wind, snow, and cold." Nan Zhiyun looked at the plum blossoms beside her.
"Integrity, and also pride, is their natural state, they are born this way," Yu Jingchen said.
"Then can't they bloom if they're not in this icy, snowy place?" Nan Zhiyun asked.
"Why do you ask that?" Yu Jingchen couldn't guess what she wanted to say.
“Blooming in such an environment is not their choice; it is only out of necessity,” Nan Zhiyun said, expressing her thoughts.
"How do you know this wasn't their own choice?" Yu Jingchen asked.
"What choice do they have? Who would willingly live in such a harsh environment from the beginning? If they could be pampered, who would want to bloom under the ice and snow?" Nan Zhiyun said earnestly.
"I used to admire them, admired that among all the trees frozen and about to break, their lone root alone remained warm. I admired that even when they fell to the ground and turned to dust, their fragrance remained. I admired that while all the other flowers withered, they alone bloomed beautifully, captivating the small garden with their charm."
“But now…” Nan Zhiyun broke off a plum blossom.
“I don’t like it anymore, it breaks my heart,” Nan Zhiyun replied.
Yu Jingchen looked at Nan Zhiyun, lost in thought, his eyes filled with complex emotions. This was the difference between Nan Zhiyun before and now.
"Is it just because you feel sorry for the plum blossoms?" Yu Jingchen asked.
“Yes, it hurts…” Nan Zhiyun didn’t look up.
Yu Jingchen fell silent. Some say that those who love plum blossoms blooming in the wind and snow are the most innocent and the best protected, knowing nothing and naive to the ways of the world...
Looking at Nan Zhiyun like this, Yu Jingchen's heart clenched slightly: "I'm sorry..." Yu Jingchen suddenly spoke.
"!!!"
Everyone was shocked. Yu Jingchen would actually say something like that? Was he apologizing?
Nan Zhiyun looked at Yu Jingchen in disbelief, flattered and even a little frightened.
“I’m sorry about the past,” Yu Jingchen said again.
"Your Majesty..." Nan Zhiyun never expected Yu Jingchen to say such a thing to her.
Yu Jingchen approached Nan Zhiyun and gently took her hand in his. It was probably because it was too cold, so it was a little red. Yu Jingchen wrapped her hand in his.
"Is it cold?" Yu Jingchen asked.
"I'm not cold," Nan Zhiyun replied, though whether that was truly the case was another matter.
"Your skin is all red from the cold, and you still say you're not cold?" Yu Jingchen pulled Nan Zhiyun closer.
"Everyone says you're afraid of the cold, so why are you covering yourself up now?" Yu Jingchen asked as he warmed Nan Zhiyun's hands.
"Nan Zhiyun, I've already told you, there's no need to be so nervous, and there's no need to be afraid." Yu Jingchen simply pulled her into his arms.
Nan Zhiyun shivered slightly.
"Don't move, let me hold you for a while," Yu Jingchen said softly.
Nan Zhiyun then stopped moving, but her body remained tense and she dared not relax.
Merlin fell silent instantly.
"Nan Zhiyun, did you hear what I just said?" Yu Jingchen's voice rang out again, very softly.
"This concubine does not understand Your Majesty's meaning," Nan Zhiyun replied, not knowing which sentence he was referring to.
"I just said that I am very sorry for what happened in the past," Yu Jingchen said again, without any impatience or reluctance.
"Your Majesty..." Nan Zhiyun's tone was unease.
"Don't move, just listen to me." Yu Jingchen hugged the person even tighter.
Nan Zhiyun fell silent upon hearing this.
Yu Jingchen wrapped Nan Zhiyun up completely, trying his best to keep her warm.
Yu Jingchen called her by her name, "Nan Zhiyun".
"I remember you used to love to laugh. You could laugh happily no matter what. You also liked to follow me around, and I couldn't shake you off no matter what I did. You were only a few years old then, weren't you?" Yu Jingchen said to himself.
"Actually, I didn't dislike you at that time. Although I sometimes found you annoying, I never thought of doing anything to you."
"But later... I..." At this point, Yu Jingchen suddenly didn't know how to begin.
"But later, I lost my sense of right and wrong, was misled by others, misunderstood the Empress Dowager, misunderstood the Nan family, and also took my anger out on you... I attributed almost all the credit for becoming the Crown Prince to the Nan family and the Empress Dowager, and I was uneasy about it. When I ascended the throne, the Empress Dowager assisted in governing the country, and she would even check the memorials I handled. I was not happy about that."
“Some might say that it’s because I’m incompetent and therefore can never escape the Nan family or the Empress Dowager’s control. Even I feel that I’m just a puppet supported by the Empress Dowager. So, the maternal relatives have always been a thorn in my side. I dislike the Empress Dowager and I also fear the Nan family.”
"But I... I may really be incapable. I can't do anything to the Empress Dowager, much less to the Nan family. Later... the Empress Dowager asked me to make you Empress. I thought it was because she had made her ambitions clear and wanted to have a child through you, so that I, the uncontrollable emperor, would no longer have any reason to exist."
"At that time, they could directly support the young emperor, hold him hostage to command the feudal lords, and the world would be your Nan family's possession..."
"Therefore, I despise you. Your very existence is a constant reminder of my incompetence. Even though you did not become Empress, I still feel hatred..."
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