“Yun’er is very well-behaved.” Looking at Nan Zhiyun’s obedient appearance, Yu Jingchen felt even more guilty.
Especially the sudden second life memories yesterday, even he himself dared not think deeply about how he did those things.
This little girl clearly deserved to be cherished and pampered as she grew up, but instead, she was tormented into that state, neither human nor ghost, filled with despair.
Now, when he looks at Nan Zhiyun's beautiful, charming, and sweet smile, he wants to go back in time and kill his past self.
Why couldn't the rebirth have happened earlier? If it had happened earlier, perhaps Nan Zhiyun wouldn't have suffered so much... Sometimes he often wondered why he was the only one with these memories. Nan Zhiyun knew nothing. Did this mean that his return was to atone for his sins? Was it to make amends?
Yu Jingchen tightened his grip on her hand. Those memories were far too cruel for Nan Zhiyun. He didn't want her to regain those memories from her two lives; besides heartache, he was perhaps more afraid. He was afraid that if she knew, she would run away from him, distance herself from him; afraid that if she knew, she would be forever trapped in those memories, suffering torment once more; afraid that if she knew, she would choose the same way she did in her previous life to leave forever…
But... if Nan Zhiyun really didn't know, wouldn't that be unfair? After all, she resented herself, even hated herself... In this life, she was at peace with herself because she didn't know what had happened.
Yu Jingchen was conflicted. Deep down, he definitely didn't want Nan Zhiyun to regain those memories. What this little girl had already suffered was the most painful thing in the world.
She has already endured the cruelest torment. It's enough for her to be happy and joyful in this life... If she were to truly recover, all three of her lives would be filled with suffering. It would be better for her to be like a child in this life, being coaxed and protected.
How wonderful it would be to be carefree... But why am I so at ease with myself? Why do I feel indifferent? How can I pretend nothing happened?
If he didn't have the feelings he have for Nan Zhiyun now, he might not care about the past. But the more he cares about Nan Zhiyun now, the more those memories torment him...
What should I do? How should I atone for my sins? How should I repent?
I'm sorry... I'm so sorry...
Looking at the little girl nestled in his arms, Yu Jingchen felt as if a knife was slowly cutting into his heart... Cutting flesh with a knife is extremely painful, and perhaps this was the beginning of a lifetime of torment. Yu Jingchen was truly filled with remorse.
"Your Majesty, what's wrong?" Nan Zhiyun hadn't noticed Yu Jingchen's movements, so she looked up at him with some confusion.
But that one glance terrified her, because she saw that Yu Jingchen's eyes were red and he was crying...
"Your Majesty?" Nan Zhiyun's voice was a little softer, and then she was about to get up. Yu Jingchen put his arm around her and watched her sit up.
"What's wrong?" Nan Zhiyun's mind was in a mess. Why was His Majesty crying? No, His Majesty was actually crying!
She reached out and gently wiped away the tears from the corners of Yu Jingchen's eyes. Seeing this, Yu Jingchen couldn't hold back any longer.
"Your Majesty?" Nan Zhiyun was somewhat at a loss.
"It's alright..." Yu Jingchen pulled the person back into his arms.
Tears welled up in her eyes, and Nan Zhiyun fell silent, nestled in Yu Jingchen's arms, and reached out to wipe them away for him.
Continue read on readnovelmtl.com
