Accident
Shi Shi always felt that she was very lucky.
Even though she grew up in a single-parent family, her mother only worried about her and provided her with a good environment so that she didn't suffer too much.
Even if you don't have a good family background or an excellent match, you can still marry into a wealthy family as you wish.
Even though her husband doesn't often come home after marriage, he will still consciously come back to accompany her during the holidays to show their love.
How many people outside envy her for having a decent marriage.
So her life has been smooth sailing so far, at least she thinks so.
But this luck seems to only last until today.
At the dinner party she specially hosted, an argument broke out. When she went to mediate, she was dragged into the quarrel by the two female guests and accidentally fell to the ground.
It was the first time that a large group of people surrounded her like this, but it was such an awkward scene.
It was not what she had expected before, to be treated like a star, to have these proud and closed-minded people truly accept her and let her become one of them.
The sharp pain in her lower abdomen made her realize it at that moment, and she understood it in an instant.
It turned out that her previous physical discomfort was because she was really pregnant, but at the same time, at this moment, she just confirmed that she was going to lose the child...
In fact, when she felt unwell before, she had guessed that she might be pregnant, but her thought was only for a moment and was soon overwhelmed by the busy preparations. She just wanted to wait until everything was over. By then, she would have time to deal with it, so she just had to hold on a little longer.
I just didn’t expect that the moment I confirmed it, it felt like I had to say goodbye to him/her…
The pain came from the bottom of her heart, a real pain that cut her heart, making her so uncomfortable that she couldn't breathe and fainted.
"What's wrong with me?" Shi Shi had actually been awake for a long time, and had been staring blankly with her eyes open. After hesitating for a long time, she finally spoke tentatively. As soon as she opened her eyes, she knew she was in a hospital room, and there was another person inside because she could feel his breath.
She actually wanted to ask, "How's the baby? Is he alright?" But she kept this question deep in her heart, unable to actually ask it. But her hand unconsciously stroked her belly gently and tentatively.
Hearing her voice, the man standing in front of the window turned around. His familiar face had a rare cold expression.
"You're fine." There was no warmth in his voice, and his eyes weren't fixed on her when he spoke. He looked very impatient.
After hearing these words, she almost understood what was going on.
"Since I'm fine, you don't need to stay here. There's no one else here, so there's no need for us to act like this. I'm tired, so go back and rest." She forced herself to finish the sentence, her hands tucked under the quilt beginning to tremble uncontrollably. She guessed the answer from his attitude. She just wanted to be alone.
"It seems that you really don't care about the child at all." He finally looked up at her, his eyes full of disappointment.
"So, what do you want me to do? Be in pain and blame myself, or break down and cry?" She was really tired, but she still looked at him and asked word by word, letting him know her uncompromising attitude.
"Do you blame yourself and feel miserable? Then why are you still busy with those things every day and don't you take care of your body at all?"
"Be careful? Why should I be careful? Do you want me to give birth to the child? Didn't you say that everything between you and me was wrong? If that's the case, why should I go through the trouble of giving birth to the child?" She had been so busy these days that she had no time to pay attention to her body. Besides, wasn't he the one who pushed her to this point?
"you..."
"What exactly are you accusing me of? I'm really tired, just let me be quiet for a while. Didn't you just want me to stay away from you in the past? So, why are you still staying here now?"
"You did something wrong, why are you still so self-righteous?"
"Qin Yichuan, I've always thought you were difficult to communicate with. You really don't understand what I'm saying. I told you to leave, so go ahead." She couldn't stand it any longer, so she threw a pillow at him. "Don't you say you never show up unless absolutely necessary? You've stayed long enough today. Leave now." She softened her tone, not bothering to even glance at him.
Being provoked by her like this, the man really couldn't stay any longer, so he left as she wished, closing the door firmly and leaving.
In the quiet ward, only her mother Shi Yiqing was with her.
"Why haven't I seen Yichuan come over these few days? Did you make him angry again?"
"Mom, why did you mention him?" Shi Shi, who was drinking soup, put down the spoon and said unhappily.
"You've been married for so many years, why are you still so petty? You should let him stay by your side and clear up the misunderstanding."
"There is no misunderstanding, never. I brought this upon myself. I asked for this."
"It's been six years, and you can still say something like that. You really haven't grown up at all."
"This is all my fault, it's all my fault.
"So, do you regret this?"
"Yes, I regret that I forced myself to marry him."
-Yes, I regret it. After having everything I wanted, I realized that I still had nothing.
-I regret it so much.
-real.
"Shi Shi, I really can't do anything with you. Just do whatever you want." Watching her mother pack up everything and leave, Shi Shi collapsed on the bed as if she had lost all her strength. She just closed her eyes, not wanting to sleep at all, but she just didn't want to move.
-I really regret it. I'm not being petty. I'm just fed up with this kind of life. This is not the perfect life I expected.
-I regret it, or more accurately, I was wrong.
-I'm sorry, Mom.
-I'm sorry. I made you give up so much because of me.
After a few days, the doctor recommended that I continue to stay in the hospital to get better care and rest from professionals.
She decided to leave the hospital on her own, carrying a simple luggage and looking pale and haggard.
But when she arrived at the hospital entrance, she stood there at a loss. Where should she go next?
Going home? Which home?
Or rather, which one is her home.
She really missed the small but cozy rental house she lived in before she got married.
It was only today that she realized for the first time that six years had passed in vain. She still had no place to stand in this city, not even a real place to live.
Shi Shi, you are such a failure.
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