Chapter 66: Trading Life for Love Leads to Enlightenment
Chapter Sixty-Six: Trading Life for Love Leads to Enlightenment
Inside the Qianqing Palace, the candles burned eternally, yet they could not dispel the bone-chilling cold and deathly silence. Li Qianche dismissed all the palace servants and sat alone by the dragon bed, tightly holding Su Su's stiff and cold hand, pressing it against his stubble-covered and haggard cheek.
The icy touch was like a sharp blade, slowly slicing through his heart. Only now, holding her lifeless body firmly in his arms, feeling the last bit of warmth drain from her skin, did he realize with heart-wrenching pain—he couldn't lose her.
All those imperial strategies, the art of checks and balances, the dominance of maternal relatives, and the taboo against expressing love... all these principles he had been instilled with since childhood and held as guiding principles became pale, powerless, and absurd in the face of her cold body.
Having lost Su Su, what meaning is there for him to live, even with this vast empire?
"Susu..." he began, his voice hoarse like a broken bellows, thick with nasal congestion and trembling uncontrollably, "I regret it... From the moment I issued the decree demoting you to a lowly concubine, I was wrong... I kept making mistakes, step by step..."
He buried his face deeper into her cold palms, his scalding tears soaking her skin.
"I gave those who wanted to hurt you an excuse and an opportunity... I don't know if you believe me..." He choked up, his emotions, which had been suppressed for too long, surging out like a flood breaking through a dam, "I love you... From the time you were a child, running around in the Empress Dowager's palace like a little dumpling following behind me, my heart has always been filled with you..."
"Sent to the Cold Palace as punishment... I only wanted you to restrain your temper and stop being so willful and reckless, so that those courtiers who have been eyeing you with predatory intent wouldn't have any grounds to attack you... Although... although I sometimes find it annoying that you always cause trouble and I have to clean up the mess, I have never truly disliked you... never..."
"It was the late emperor... He told me that a ruler must not show his joy or anger on his face, especially not to his beloved, otherwise it will become her death warrant..."
His voice lowered, carrying a deep-seated trauma, "I witnessed it with my own eyes... how my mother was pushed to the forefront by the late emperor's favor, and in the end... I believed it, and I endured it all, kept it hidden... But now I regret it! I regret it so much it's turning my guts out!"
He abruptly raised his head, his bloodshot eyes fixed on her peaceful sleeping face, as if trying to wake her from her slumber. "Wake up! Get up and hit me! Curse me! Make a scene with me like before! Su Su! Get up! I was wrong!"
He seemed to have gone mad, grabbing her cold, stiff hand and slapping it hard against his own face. The icy touch combined with the slight pain on his cheek only intensified his despair.
The soft "snap" sounds were particularly clear in the silent hall.
In her dream, Su Su stood beside him, watching him mutter to himself like a trapped beast, hurting and punishing himself, and listening to his belated confession, tears already streaming down her face.
She reached out to stop him, to touch his gaunt face, to tell him, "Don't do this, I know everything," but her hand passed through his body like air, and her voice vanished into nothingness.
She could only look at him, her heart aching, and she murmured through her tears, "Do you know how to regret it now... Who taught you to be so stoic and silent back then, pretending to be cold and hard!"
He sat by the dragon bed for three whole days without eating, drinking, or sleeping, like a soulless statue. Shen Gaoyi brought in food several times, kneeling on the ground and pleading desperately, even kowtowing until his forehead bled, but he seemed not to hear, staring blankly at the person on the bed, as if everything in the outside world was no longer relevant to him.
On the fourth day, he finally moved. He summoned Nightshade in a hoarse voice.
“Go…find Daoist Lingyun to enter the palace.” His voice was weak, but it carried a resolute determination, as if he had made a desperate gamble.
On the fifth day, the weary Taoist Lingyun was urgently summoned to the Qianqing Palace. When he saw the woman who had been dead for some time on the dragon bed, and the emperor who was emaciated but whose eyes burned with an eerie flame, he understood immediately.
"Your Majesty..." Lingyun Daoist had just opened his mouth when he was interrupted by Li Qianche.
"Daoist Master," Li Qianche's eyes were empty yet stubborn as he stared intently at him, "I want Su Su to come back to life. No matter the method, no matter the cost, I will agree! Even if it costs me my life, I will give it to her!"
Upon hearing this in her dream, Su Su was shocked and rushed to Li Qianche's side, futilely trying to cover his mouth, crying out, "What are you doing! Li Qianche, you're confused! No! I don't want you to change!"
Looking at the emperor before him, who was nearly driven mad by love, Master Lingyun sighed deeply: "Your Majesty, forcibly reversing life and death is going against the will of Heaven. The one who performs the ritual will surely be punished by Heaven and have his lifespan shortened; this is destiny."
"I don't care!" Li Qianche answered without the slightest hesitation, his voice resolute. "Without her, I'm nothing but a walking corpse. Take as many lifespans as you want! I just want to bring her back to life!"
Su Su stood by, sobbing uncontrollably, shaking her head desperately, but she couldn't change anything.
Knowing that his mind was made up and it would be difficult to persuade him otherwise, Master Lingyun could only nod heavily: "Since that's the case... I will do my best to try."
He ordered his men to set up a magic array inside the Qianqing Palace. They mixed cinnabar with the blood from Li Qianche's fingertips and drew intricate and ancient runes on the ground. Forty-nine eternal lamps were lit around the area, their wicks made of specially made silk threads soaked in the lip rouge that Su Su often used. When they burned, they emitted the familiar fragrance that Su Su always wore. At the center of the array, a jade pendant symbolizing Li Qianche's birthday and imbued with the aura of her true dragon for many years was placed, nestled against a strand of Su Su's black hair.
Master Lingyun, holding a peach wood sword, strode forward, chanting incantations. As his incantations grew more urgent, the hall stirred without wind, and the flames of the ever-burning lamps began to flicker violently, casting dappled shadows on everyone's faces, making them appear ghostly. The cinnabar-painted runes seemed to come alive, faintly shimmering with a blood-red light.
Li Qianche stood beside the array's core, staring intently at Su Su on the bed, letting the eerie wind whip his robes and hair around. His eyes held an almost devout anticipation and a desperate madness.
Suddenly, all the ever-burning lamps lit up and then went out at the same time! Only the jade pendant at the center of the array emitted a warm glow, enveloping Su Su within it for about the time it takes for an incense stick to burn, before gradually dimming.
The wind stopped, and the hall returned to deathly silence.
Master Lingyun seemed to have exhausted all his strength; his face was ashen, and sweat soaked through his robes. He staggered, barely managing to steady himself by using his sword for support. He wearily closed his eyes, then opened them again, looking at Li Qianche's burning gaze. His voice was hoarse as he said, "Your Majesty… I have done my utmost. With the aid of your true dragon energy and lifespan, I forcibly reversed a sliver of fate… Miss Su's soul… has entered reincarnation and will be reborn in the next life…"
He paused, reluctant but having to say it: "However, defying fate comes at a great price. Your Majesty... your lifespan is limited to thirty-five years. This is ordained by Heaven and cannot be changed."
Thirty-five years old!
In her dream, Su Su was struck dumb, covering her mouth in shock as tears streamed down her face. So... so her rebirth, her chance to escape the tragic fate of her past life, was actually bought with nearly half of Li Qianche's lifespan!
Upon hearing this, Li Qianche's tense shoulders and back suddenly relaxed, and then a pale smile of satisfaction appeared on his face. He looked deeply at Su Su, who seemed to be just sleeping on the bed, and said softly, "It's alright... as long as she can come back to life... that's all that matters."
He walked over to the bedside, took her hand that was pressed against her face, and said, "Wait for me, wait for me to settle everything. Soon, I will go with you."
Upon learning this shocking truth, Su Su, overwhelmed with grief and shock, gradually lost consciousness from that heartbreaking dream...
……………
"Waaah..." A suppressed, sorrowful sob echoed in the quiet Yongshou Palace bedroom.
Li Qianche was immediately awakened. By the dim moonlight filtering through the tent, he saw Su Su beside him with her eyes closed, tears streaming down her face, soaking the pillow.
He panicked immediately, quickly pulling her, blanket and all, into his arms, gently patting her back with tenderness, his voice hoarse from just waking up and filled with intense anxiety:
"Qingqing, what's wrong? Did you have a nightmare? Did I make you angry again last night? It's my fault, I was wrong, don't cry, don't cry..." He clumsily wiped away her tears, but the warm tears burned his heart and made him completely lose his composure.
He tightened his arms, pulling her closer into his embrace, and made a series of incoherent promises: "It's all my fault. We won't take care of you anymore. I won't restrain you anymore. You don't have to drink those bitter medicines. You can eat whatever you want, whether it's cold or spicy. If... if you don't want to have children, then we won't have any, okay?"
He lowered his head, his cheek brushing against her tear-streaked hair, his voice softer and more resigned than ever before, "I don't want anything, I just want you to be happy. Don't cry, be good..."
He tried to soothe her incoherently, wishing he could present her with all the treasures in the world, just to stop her heartbreaking sobs.
Su Su slowly opened her eyes in his warm embrace and with his anxious words of comfort. The heart-wrenching grief in her dream and the real warmth and care she received at this moment intertwined, making her feel as if she had been transported to another world.
She looked up, her eyes blurry with tears, at the handsome face before her, etched with worry. Suddenly, she stretched out her arms and wrapped them tightly around his neck, burying her face in his firm chest, and asked in a thick, nasal voice:
"Li Qianche...why...are you being so nice to me now?"
Li Qianche was taken aback by her abrupt question, then chuckled, pulling her closer in a hug, his chin nuzzling against the top of her head. Naturally, and for the first time so clearly and directly, he answered:
"Silly Susu, is there even a need to ask? It's because I care about you and love you."
It wasn't for compensation, nor for weighing the pros and cons; it was simply because I held this person dear in my heart.
These words, like the final key, completely unlocked the ice wall in Su Su's heart built up by the pain of her past life. All the resentment, grievances, tests, and anxieties vanished in his word "love," in the face of the chance to be reborn at the cost of his life.
She choked back tears in his arms, then said softly but firmly in a tone she had never used before, filled with dependence and determination, "I will... be obedient from now on. I will take my medicine and take good care of myself... so that I can give birth to your child as soon as possible."
Li Qianche was completely stunned. He couldn't understand why, after a nightmare, the little woman in his arms, who had been so awkward for so long, would suddenly become so obedient and even bring up having children.
But this didn't stop his heart from being instantly filled with a huge, soft, warm current, almost overflowing. He tightened his arms, completely enclosing the petite girl within his territory, his chin resting on the top of her head, his voice filled with unprecedented tenderness and contentment:
"Alright, I'll listen to Susu. I've also longed to have a child with you... for a very long time."
The night was gentle, and within the tent, the two embraced, the last barrier between their hearts finally melting away. The regrets and pain of their past life transformed into the warmth and certainty of their tight embrace in this life.
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