Shu Yao wanted nothing more than to slap him and yell at him, "I don't believe you!"
His vows are now worthless to her. He swore before that he'd only ever have her, and now he's swearing Luo Wenpei is the last? Isn't that ridiculous? Does he really think he's some kind of baby? If she still believes him, she's got a screw loose!
Huo Jingsha was eager to win her heart back, and he showered her forehead, brows, and cheeks with wet kisses. He lifted her chin, and just as he was about to seal her lips with his, Shu Yao turned her head away.
An eerie silence fell over the air. Huo Jingsha's face froze, hovering just an inch from her lips. Neither of them made a further move. He couldn't believe it; Shu Yao had actually dodged his kiss. How could he bear this? He had explained so much, humbled himself, apologized, and begged for reconciliation, all to no avail. She still stubbornly rejected him, keeping him at arm's length.
No! He wouldn't accept her estrangement. She belonged to him from the start, in life and in death! A violent light flashed in Huo Jingsha's eyes. He wanted to violently turn her head and kiss her fiercely.
But... just as he was about to take action, he heard her softly utter three words—"I'm sorry."
Huo Jingsha's heart softened, and he was overjoyed. See, his good wife still had a soft heart; she still couldn't bear to see him sad and knew to apologize. That's wonderful, that's wonderful!
Shu Yao uttered those three words because she realized that this man still had feelings for her, but he had given half of his heart, which originally belonged entirely to her, to someone else. And she was destined to betray that half of his feelings. Now... she couldn't even bear his touch, she really couldn't bear it.
She used to feel so intimate and warm sitting on his lap, but now she feels like she's sitting on pins and needles; she used to love his touch and his kisses, but now she's afraid she can't avoid them.
All because from now on, he will no longer be hers alone. The legs that sat on him will sit on others, the hands that touched her will touch others, and even the lips that kissed her will kiss others. He will be kind to others, gentle, considerate, and caring, just like he once was to her. He will even take off his clothes and make love to others as he once did with her. Just thinking about these things makes her want to vomit.
"I'm sorry, Jing Sha. Let's call it even. You hurt me once, and I hurt you once. Avoiding you was my subconscious action, an instinct from my body. Maybe I need some time to slowly let go on my own."
“I know, I understand. The hurt you caused me is nothing compared to the hurt I caused you, Yao’er. I can give you time, however long it may take. My heart for you will never change, and I am grateful for the sacrifices you have made for me. But remember, we are husband and wife. No matter how unhappy you are, you shouldn't keep it to yourself. Tell me, and I can solve anything for you. You are not alone. You have me, you have a husband, and you have a man who can shelter you from the wind and rain.” He didn't like her being “alone.” In this life, they were already one, an inseparable family.
She shook her head. "Some things you have to learn to face alone. No one can be with anyone forever, not even you and me. I don't want to rely on you too much anymore. Maybe one day... Anyway, you and I should learn to slowly adapt to life without each other."
"What nonsense are you talking about? You Shuyao, you're confused, you're stupid, you know? Every word you say is wrong. We won't separate, never. What do you mean by learning to adapt to not having each other? That's all bullshit! You don't need to learn to be independent. Instead, you need to learn how to rely on me wholeheartedly, understand?"
Considering you're not feeling well, I won't hold it against you. The doctor said your body still needs time; when people aren't feeling well, their emotions are unstable, they overthink, and they tend to imagine the worst in good things. So, until you're better, I'll forgive you. But you can't push your luck and keep testing my limits with your words. I've decided that tomorrow I'll have the doctor give you some medication to help you conceive. Our baby is getting bigger; let's have another one soon, so you don't waste your energy thinking about these unrealistic things.”
He was shifting the focus of the struggle, and also trying to reassure her. The moment he heard her utter words of distancing herself, his heart ached. And this woman was even more vengeful than him. Ever since she accidentally used "we" to refer to him and Luo Wenpei, she hadn't used "we" with him again, always using "you and me." He understood that she wanted to distance herself from him, to separate them into two sides, two countries, two worlds. But he wouldn't allow it! He wouldn't allow it!
She shook her head slightly and said, "Xiao Bao is not even five months old yet. I don't plan to have another child, especially at this time. I've been an orphan since I was little and have suffered a lot. Now that I have Xiao Bao, I naturally want to put all my love on him. If I have another child, it will definitely take away some of my love for him. He will be sad and upset. I love him, how can I bear to see him sad? If I could bear to see him sad, then it wouldn't be true love!"
Upon hearing this, Huo Jingsha's face turned green again, and her knuckles cracked as she clenched her fists. Don't think he couldn't tell that she was clearly making a veiled attack!
"If you have the chance, why not take her as your concubine? That way, your child with her will also be a legitimate son. I don't expect Xiao Bao to become such a high-ranking official like you. If I were to educate him, I would focus more on his character, so he might not be able to inherit your career. Why don't you have a child with her and see if that resolves your regret of having no heir?" She looked up at him calmly and serenely. Since she had decided to repay and give in, she would do it thoroughly. She had her own purpose in doing this. Perhaps if that woman also had his child, he wouldn't be so reluctant to part with Xiao Bao.
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