Chapter 126 Two-in-One Is this spit out or pooped out? …
Song Ruan's spoon was still in the pot of green purple rice porridge.
But technology is powerful. I put two spoonfuls of alkaline flour in it, and the purple rice porridge suddenly looked a lot thicker.
She had just lifted the lid and did not move the pot away. The corn cobs that had just been added under the stove were still burning, and the porridge inside was still boiling slowly.
Bubbles rose from the bottom of the pot, pushing up the thick green porridge, slowly pushing it into small mounds on the surface, which burst with a gurgle, but without even splashing the soup. The thick porridge looked like a piece of green crystal mud with a hole poked in it, and white smoke came out of it.
Song Ruan: ...
Anti-Sperm System: ...
The anti-essence system hesitated for a long time:
[Zhou...blows out smoke rings? 】
Song Ruan became angry and said, "Nonsense! Nonsense! This is, this is..."
She stammered and couldn't quite come up with the answer.
The anti-jing system said from the bottom of its heart:
[You have some talent for being a witch. Look at this witch soup. Many serious witches can't make it like you. Others cook the food, you cook the method. 】
Song Ruan's face flushed, veins popping out on his forehead, and he argued, "What witch soup...what recipe! This is my bright red porridge! Bright red porridge!"
What followed was a string of incomprehensible words, such as "it's just a rage" and "red and green are one", which made the system laugh. The kitchen was filled with a happy atmosphere.
The anti-essence system then asked:
[I won’t even talk about red and purple. Look at this piece. Does it look like porridge? 】
Song Ruan's face turned even redder. Unconvinced by being questioned, she scooped out a lump of food with a spoon and shouted, "Why isn't it porridge? Why isn't it porridge? I'll eat it for you to see!"
After all, she made it herself, and she knew exactly what she put in it. Song Ruan glanced at the spoonful of green porridge from the corner of her eye, took a deep breath, closed her eyes and poured it into her mouth.
The tentacles of the anti-semen system were all erected, and its eyes were staring at her without blinking.
In fact, it is purple sweet potato, purple rice and red dates. Song Ruan also added some beans as embellishment. They are all good things. If you ignore the color, it actually tastes very good.
Song Ruan closed her eyes and put the spoon on the stove: "Look, why is it not porridge? Where did I poison it?"
The system was silent for a while. Song Ruan thought it was convinced and was about to show a smug look when suddenly a dialogue from a TV drama with music rang in his mind.
[You say that everything is empty, but you keep your eyes closed. If you open your eyes and look at me, I don't believe that your eyes are empty. ①
Song Ruan: ...
Song Ruan: …………
She opened her eyes angrily, and was shocked back by the fluorescent green porridge, which was really painful to her eyes.
Because it was not removed from the fire, the already thick porridge was boiled for a while longer, and the remaining moisture was evaporated. The beans and jujubes were boiled to the point where their original colors could not be seen, and they were lumped together with the rice on the side. The purple sweet potato had been boiled into a paste-like state, and appeared in a semi-melted state in the pot. How to describe it...
It really looks like a bunch of sticky vomit, and it's green.
Song Ruan was silent.
Song Ruan looked away.
"Give it to Jinhua!"
Jinhua, who was peeking out of the door, was a tiger, and scared the mouse so much that it squeaked. Then, dragging its white scarf in its mouth, it rushed into the bedroom and kicked the door shut with one claw.
——It only has this one cub left! No matter how much you are bullied, you can't die from this. How frustrating!
Song Ruan insisted: "Ah, I forgot that Jinhua is a carnivore - give it to good people!"
Haoshi took three steps back with a stern look, the hair on his neck stood up. He rushed into his own donkey shed without looking back, poked the door with his long mouth, and slammed it shut.
The anti-sperm system couldn't help but burst out laughing in her mind.
Song Ruan: ...
She was pouting unhappily when suddenly an idea came to her mind and she slapped her head: "System, let me make this for you..."
[Administrator Tip: Your system has been requested to be offline for half a day. During this period, host transaction needs must be processed by self-service in the system mall]
Song Ruan:. . . . .
What kind of people are these? There is no spirit of sharing and fraternity at all!
But it was all good food after all, it just looked a little strange, but after all, it was made by Song Ruan herself, so it was indeed non-toxic. Song Ruan looked at the green porridge with a sad face for a while, and finally made a brave decision: she would eat it! !
In this age of food and clothing shortages when everyone is hungry, wasting food is truly a cause for concern.
Song Ruan closed her eyes, kicked her feet, and made up her mind. She found a wet rag and planned to put the pot on the kang table - all the ingredients were put in by her personally, so they couldn't be poisonous, and she would eat it! !
What's wrong with green? Green is the color of life, the color of freshness, the color of hope, and the color of... wooooooo.
Just at this moment, there was a knock on the door. Song Ruan's eyes lit up, and as if she was escaping the death penalty, she dropped the rag and ran to open the door.
"Who is it?"
As soon as she opened the door, she saw Mrs. Sun looking around with a sly look in her eyes. She was holding an empty lunch box in her hand. When she saw her open the door, her eyes lit up.
"Xiao Song, I'm out of soy sauce and I'm in a hurry to cook. I want to borrow some from you."
He said he came to borrow soy sauce, but he was holding a huge empty bowl. It was obvious what he was planning - Song Ruan saw it at a glance.
When Mrs. Sun was swept from head to toe by Song Ruan's knowing gaze, she felt a little uneasy, but then she thought that today was New Year's Eve, and then she straightened her chest again.
It’s New Year’s Day, can Song Ruan still hit her? !
She knew that the thing that Song Ruan, this greedy girl, didn't want to treat badly was her mouth. She ate delicious food every day regardless of festivals. The fragrance wafted to their house. Now it was New Year's Day, and she wondered how many delicious foods she had to make!
Why does a little girl like you eat so well?
The most infuriating thing is that you eat so well every day, but you don’t even share any with others. You are so unfriendly to your neighbors and disrespectful to the elderly. You are so selfish!
Mrs. Sun is a person who is obsessed with getting something for nothing. She has been sitting next to such a huge mountain of gold for so long but has not been able to get any light from it. She has been feeling uncomfortable for a long time and she is determined to dig a piece of it down today!
Mrs. Sun is ambitious, full of fighting spirit and strong will.
Song Ruan knew at a glance what this cunning old woman was going to do. She was not willing to suffer a loss, and what if she gave it to her this time and she got enough of it, she would come back for more next time in a pretentious manner? Absolutely not!
Song Ruan folded his arms and was about to enter combat mode, but suddenly stopped.
She looked at Grandma Sun carefully again, her eyes focused on the empty lunch box in her hand. Her eyes suddenly lit up, like a lighthouse in the dark sea, like a miner's lamp in a mine, like a searchlight on a gun tower, emitting a dazzling light.
Look at this big empty bowl, it can just hold her pot of green porridge!
"Granny Sun!" A smile appeared on her face unconsciously and her voice became hoarse.
It was the first time that Mrs. Sun received such a warm reception from Song Ruan. She unconsciously took a step back and looked at her warily.
I don't know why, but I suddenly felt a little hairy, and even the lunch box in my hand seemed a lot heavier.
But who is she? She is the number one figure in the Dongfeng Brigade, Nan Bowan in Crouching Dragon and Phoenix. Although Song Ruan is indeed quite powerful, she has lived for so many more years and has eaten more salt than she has eaten rice. How could she be so frightened by a little girl like her?
Grandma Sun thought about this and suppressed the uneasy feeling in her heart: "Xiao Song, soy sauce..."
Song Ruan forced a warm smile on her face, looking gentle and considerate: "It's like this, Grandma Sun, my family is out of soy sauce, but it's New Year's Day, and I'm embarrassed to ask you to go back empty-handed - how about this, I cooked a pot of porridge, do you want to take some back?"
When Mrs. Sun heard that there was no soy sauce, her face changed. She was about to speak, but when she heard Song Ruan say that there was porridge, the expression on her face turned kind again, it was so changeable.
"Oh my, this is really the best, Xiao Song, you are the one." Mrs. Sun gave Song Ruan a thumbs up and followed her to the kitchen excitedly.
I passed by bedrooms and donkey sheds with tightly closed doors and didn't notice anything was wrong - it's extremely cold in Northeast China in winter, and if the door isn't closed tightly, the wind can turn you into a popsicle.
Song Ruan gave Grandma Sun a shot of caution on the way: "Grandma Sun, I'm just a little girl after all. My cooking skills are not very good, and the taste may be a little worse. Please bear with me."
Grandma Sun waved her hand and said, "It's okay. I'm not such a hypocritical person! The taste doesn't matter. It's fine as long as it's cooked. If it's not cooked, I'll go back and cook it again. Don't worry, Xiao Song!"
"It's definitely cooked," Song Ruan's smile deepened, and she opened the kitchen door attentively: "Then Grandma Sun, come in quickly, come on."
After all, Song Ruan used only the best rice and grains, and had been simmering on the fire for so long, as soon as you entered the door, you could still smell the light and fresh aroma of rice, mixed with the sweetness of beans and red dates.
——Well, it’s quite deceptive at first smell.
Grandma Sun's eyes lit up: "Xiao Song, you are so generous! You are a good girl. I just want to drink some porridge today, please give me more."
As she spoke, she brought the big bowl in her hand closer, licked her lips, and looked as if she couldn't wait.
The good girl Song Ruan was afraid that she would regret it after seeing the real picture, so she quickly found a big soup spoon and with a big, accurate movement, she dropped a full spoonful into Grandma Sun's bowl.
It was so full of weight that Mrs. Sun felt as if there were suddenly two big blue bricks in her hands, and her hands were pressed down.
But she didn't feel unhappy at all, she was very happy. It's better to be heavier, because heavier means you get more. For free things, of course the more the better!
She even went a step further and said, "Xiao Song, give me more food, I love it..."
After seeing clearly what was in the bowl, the voice hesitated and became lower and lower, and finally disappeared.
Song Ruan didn't feel offended at all, she was even waiting for Grandma Sun to say this. Seeing that she seemed a little dumbfounded, she was afraid that she would go back on her word, so she quickly scooped up another large spoonful and put it into the lunch box again.
As soon as she heard the knock on the door, she went out happily and completely forgot to take the pot off the fire. The porridge was bubbling on the fire, and the last bit of soup was absorbed. It was so thick that it would not fall over even if you inserted a chopstick. Song Ruan could hardly stir it with a spoon.
It was so thick and sticky, like cement that had just been mixed with water. It piled up firmly in Grandma Sun's bowl, even to the point of bulging out, with no sign of flowing away.
Seeing that Mrs. Sun seemed to have not reacted yet, Song Ruan quickly scraped the bottom of the pot and scooped out the last bit, then "pop" another spoonful.
After three big spoonfuls of porridge, the rice in Grandma Sun's bowl had already peaked out, and there was no sign of it spilling out like normal porridge. The grains of rice were all firmly stuck together in unity, standing like a pyramid.
How can I describe this picture? It’s a bit like an emoticon package in later generations, which is the one - "I’m thirsty.jpg".
It's just green rice.
Grandma Sun looked at this thick, blue-green, sticky thing, which contained clumps of unknown stuff, large and small lumps, and some black particles formed by the burnt bottom. The expression on her face was as colorful as the bowl of rice.
She was a little angry for a rare moment: "Xiao Song, we are all neighbors. I came to borrow some soy sauce from you. If you really don't want to give it to me, forget it. But what do you mean by giving me the stuff in your spit pot?"
"What are you talking about! What are you talking about!" Song Ruan retorted loudly, "This is the purple sweet potato and red date porridge I just cooked!"
I don’t know if it’s because it was cooked for too long or something, but coupled with the black color at the bottom, the original bright green color turned into a darker dark green - this is a more elegant way of saying it, if you want to be more vulgar, you can call it shit green.
Mrs. Sun looked at the basin of biological and chemical weapons in her hand - this must have been what the Japanese looked like when they unscrupulously released poison gas bombs, right?
Seeing that she was silent, Song Ruan quickly found a small spoon, scooped a little and put it into his own mouth.
"Look, Granny Sun, it's good! There are good things in it, purple sweet potatoes, purple rice, red dates, soybeans... they are all precious grains. I put some alkaline flour in it, so it looks like this! It's edible!"
Seeing that Song Ruan really dared to feed her, Mrs. Sun carefully observed the porridge in her hand, and then she reluctantly believed that this thing was indeed human food.
But this is really... She has lived for so many years, and this is the first time she has seen an aunt like this.
Seeing that even Grandma Sun, who was so exhausted that she almost pried off two sparrow feathers, began to hesitate, Song Ruan was afraid that she would not accept the offer, so she quickly added weight - she took out an egg from the cupboard, knocked it on the edge of the table, and cracked it into Grandma Sun's bowl.
Seeing that the egg was about to slide down from the onion pyramid, Song Ruan quickly took out chopsticks and stirred it inside. The egg was stirred and then cooked by the boiling porridge, forming egg flowers that decorated the green cement tower.
Ah, it was supposed to be a decoration, but with the addition of egg drops, it became yellow, green, black, floc-like, clumpy, granular, and semi-digested... Mrs. Sun's face was as complicated as the porridge in her hand.
They are all good things indeed, but, but like this...
Song Ruan finally got rid of the burden, and before she could react, she hurriedly pushed her out: "Grandma Sun, I think it's getting late, you should go back for the reunion dinner, I won't keep you any longer."
She pulled and tugged him to the door, slammed the door shut, and said, "Hurry up and leave!"
As soon as the door was closed, she put her hands on her hips and laughed silently with pride: Hahaha, she is such a genius!
Shaking off the frustrating witch Meng Po Zhou, she walked lightly towards her room - to eat something delicious! Oh my, our neighbor Mrs. Sun is sometimes quite useful!
At the door, Mrs. Sun was holding something heavy in her hands and walking towards the house in a trance.
Tiedan would lie in the corner every day and smell the aroma of Song Ruan's dishes. He had longed for the cabbage from Song Ruan's family. When he saw his grandmother coming back with a big bowl of cabbage, he ran over without a moment's delay.
"Grandma! Grandma! What delicious food did you get...?"
He saw the yellow and green paste on Grandma Sun's hand and was shocked. His mouth opened into an O shape and he was choked by the cold wind and started coughing.
"Grandma, why are you bringing this pig grass paste over here?" he asked in shock, "Is this vomited or pooped out?"
After being reminded by her grandson, Mrs. Sun finally remembered what this familiar feeling was. But when she heard the second half of the sentence, her face turned dark - after all, she was the one who brought it back, and it sounded like she was not picky and wanted anything dirty or smelly.
"What nonsense! This is purple sweet potato and red date porridge!" She defended her dignity. "It's all good stuff! Song Ruan even cracked an egg into it!"
Tiedan came over hesitantly, took a look, and ran away again: "Grandma, you are lying, where is the "purple" and "red"? It's green!"
After hesitating for a while, Grandma Sun couldn't explain it at all. She put the porridge on the table and said, "Stop talking nonsense. Go and call your mother and uncles and aunts to come and eat!"
Tiedan looked at the green thing, his little face wrinkled as if he had turned eighty years old in advance, and he pouted his little mouth to call for help.
After all, there is a retired cadre in the family and the conditions are not bad. It is also the New Year, so the meal prepared by Mrs. Sun is actually quite rich.
There is pork stewed with sauerkraut vermicelli, radish stewed with salted fish, stir-fried cabbage with pickled cucumbers, and a large plate of dumplings. Anyone who sees it will have to praise it as such a sumptuous New Year.
——If you don’t look at the green paste-like thing in the middle.
Zhao Weimin walked in in his slippers and was immediately attracted by the green spot. He shivered and almost dropped his shoes.
"Mom, mom, today is Chinese New Year."
What is this? As the saying goes, the year ends with the sound of firecrackers. Does his mother want to get rid of them?
Not only him, but the others who had just walked into the room also widened their eyes.
Granny Sun was also very offended by the green shit in the basin, and she was very upset. She glanced at him and said, "Who prepared so many dishes for you during the New Year?"
Zhao Weimin sat at the table and tried to stay away from the pot of something. It was placed in the middle of the square table and he could see it no matter where he sat.
He wanted to ask, but seeing Grandma Sun's aggressive face, he shut up silently.
It doesn’t matter, just don’t clamp it for a while.
He comforted himself in this way and planned to focus on other dishes later.
Apparently, other people thought so too.
I ate until the end, and except for the salted fish, which still had its head and tail left because of its symbolism of "abundance every year", all the other dishes had their soups wiped out, except for the green paste in the middle, which had not a drop left.
Everyone looked at each other, and then turned their eyes away as if nothing had happened and tacitly.
After all, she had specifically asked for it. If she didn't eat a bite, it would seem like she was being annoying and doing nothing.
An inexplicable feeling rose in Grandma Sun's heart. Seeing her son and daughter-in-law put down their chopsticks and were about to leave, she slapped her hand on the table:
"It's only been a few days since we had good days, and you've forgotten the origin of the matter, right? This porridge contains rice, dates, and eggs, all of which are good things. Why are you so picky and not eating it just because it looks ugly?"
She spoke in a loud voice, as if trying to convince herself: "Hold out your bowls!"
Everyone in the Zhao family: ... No, no, Mom, this is not just a simple and ugly question, this, this...
However, Mrs. Sun was determined and took the porridge bowl with her left hand, took out the soup spoon from the pot of stewed pork with her right hand, and poured a spoonful of porridge into each of their bowls.
The third brother made her angry the most, so she gave him a big spoonful; the third brother's wife was not a good person either, so she also gave her a full spoonful; the second brother was a cadre and she would need to rely on him in the future, so she gave him a small spoonful... After dividing it like this, there was only half a mouthful left, which she poured into her own bowl with satisfaction.
"I'll eat with you!" said Mrs. Sun righteously.
Everyone in the Zhao family: ...
Everyone held their rice bowls. The closer the bowls were to their mouths, the more the expressions on their faces looked like they were about to die.
Tiedan looked at the dark green and yellowish mess and finally couldn't help himself and cried out: "Mother, mother, I don't want to eat green shit."
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