Confessing the past
At this moment, Fang Jinyu walked over and sat down on the other side of Ding Xuefei.
"What are you talking about?" he asked with a smile, handing him a can of beer.
Ding Xuefei accepted it and thanked her in a low voice.
As the fireworks display drew to a close, the night sky gradually returned to tranquility, leaving only the crackling of the bonfire and the sound of waves crashing on the beach.
The others dispersed in twos and threes, some strolling along the beach, others sitting around the campfire chatting.
Fang Jinyu took a sip of her drink, gazed at the dark horizon in the distance, and casually asked, "Xuefei, do you think... there's a possibility for us?"
Ding Xuefei's heart tightened, and she gripped the beer can tightly.
He knew this problem was bound to come sooner or later.
He turned his head and looked at Fang Jinyu.
Even in the glow of the campfire, the idol's profile remained impeccably handsome, his eyes gentle and expectant.
A few days ago, he might have hesitated, or been flattered, but now…
He took a deep breath, his tone full of apology but his attitude clear: "Brother Jinyu, you are truly a very, very good person, incredibly talented, gentle and considerate. I'm so happy to be your fan. But... I'm sorry. There's already someone I can't let go of in my heart."
Fang Jinyu listened quietly, his face showing little surprise, only a faint hint of disappointment flashing in his eyes. He smiled, raised his beer can and clinked it against Ding Xuefei's: "I understand. Looks like I'm a step too late." He said casually, "Then I wish you happiness. If you need any help with music in the future, feel free to contact me anytime."
"Thank you, Brother Jinyu," Ding Xuefei said sincerely, feeling both touched and relieved.
*
Ding Xuefei paced back and forth in the room, holding her hot phone.
Shang Rou's words woke him up, and Fang Jinyu's carefree letting go made him breathe a sigh of relief.
He did want to follow his heart, but the heavy pressure of reality dampened his newly mustered courage.
He needs someone he can absolutely trust, someone who can give him the purest advice.
His finger hovered over the contacts list, finally landing on "sister." He took a deep breath and dialed Ding Xueji's number.
"Brother?" The call was answered quickly, and Ding Xueji's voice was filled with excitement. "Why are you calling me at this hour? Aren't you busy recording the show? I've been watching the live streams every day lately!"
Hearing his sister's familiar voice, Ding Xuefei's tense nerves relaxed slightly. He walked to the window, looked at the deep night outside, and said in a slightly hoarse voice, "Xiao Ji, I... have something I want to tell you."
"Hmm? What's wrong, brother? You don't sound right." Ding Xueji keenly noticed her brother's low spirits.
“It’s just…if, I mean if,” Ding Xuefei carefully chose her words, her heart pounding like a drum, “I might have to…start a new relationship.”
"Wow!!!" Ding Xueji's excited scream burst from the other end of the phone, almost shattering Ding Xuefei's eardrums. "Really, bro?! Who is it?! Is it a guest on the show? Let me guess... Is it a hot girl like Stella, or a gentle type like Shang Rou? It can't be the lively type like Xu Yimeng, right? No, no, could it be the new Ye Ming? Bro, tell me quickly, I'm so anxious!"
Hearing her sister's series of guesses, Ding Xuefei's lips twitched involuntarily, then she quickly pursed them.
It seems that although my sister says she ships him with a romantic partner, she actually thinks he will find a girlfriend.
He suddenly felt a little uncertain.
Ding Xuefei closed her eyes briefly, as if making a decision, her voice so low it was almost inaudible: "...Not a female guest."
The other end of the phone went silent instantly.
Two seconds later, Ding Xueji asked tentatively, her voice filled with disbelief, "...Male...male guest? Brother, you...you are...?"
"Mmm." Ding Xuefei gave an affirmative answer, feeling her cheeks burning slightly.
"Ah!!" Ding Xueji screamed uncontrollably from the other end of the phone. "Did I really bump into him? Is it...is it him? Oh my god!"
Ding Xuefei noticed that her younger sister's voice was full of surprise and showed no resistance, so her heart, which had been hanging in suspense, finally settled down.
It was difficult to say, and after hesitating for a long time, he finally couldn't help but interrupt his sister's rambling and said helplessly, "Yes, it's Yu Songlin."
"Ahhh!!!" Ding Xueji's exclamation rose again, "Brother! It's actually true! I have a male sister-in-law!"
Hearing that address again, Ding Xuefei pinched the bridge of his nose. He was a little embarrassed and couldn't explain it clearly, so he simply stopped explaining: "You're just accepting it like that? Aren't you shocked?"
“Weren’t you shocked just now?” Ding Xueji chuckled. “But… I actually had a vague idea that you like boys…”
Before Ding Xuefei could ask, Ding Xueji continued, "Someone as handsome as you, still not dating even though you're in college... My parents and I guessed you probably don't like girls..."
"And back then you were renting a place off-campus, right? Mom visited you once, and when she came back she said she thought you might be dating someone, but she wouldn't let me ask. Later I heard Mom and Dad say they thought you might be dating a guy, but neither of them objected. They were just afraid you'd feel awkward, so they wanted to wait for you to come out first..."
When Ding Xuefei mentioned his parents, his eyes welled up with tears. At that time, he hadn't had a chance to come out to his parents when his family suddenly faced a crisis. Four years later, he was surprised to learn that his parents had known all along and were actually very supportive.
Noticing Ding Xuefei's low spirits, Ding Xueji cheerfully changed the subject: "Brother, I'm really happy for you. You're getting on in years, it's time to find someone. I think Brother Lin is great, he can cook and is gentle, perfect for you! By the way, is he good to you? I heard that dating reality shows are all acting, he's not lying to you, is he..."
Ding Xueji was analyzing things on her own, and she even started to worry about Ding Xuefei.
Ding Xuefei found it amusing, yet also felt a warmth from his sister's thoughtfulness. He chuckled and said, "Of course not! Actually, he and I..."
His palms were sweating as he held the phone, wondering how his sister would react if he said what he was about to say.
He paused, then dropped the second bombshell in as calm a tone as possible: "Actually... it's not a new relationship."
"Huh? What do you mean?" Ding Xueji's lively atmosphere came to an abrupt halt, her tone filled with confusion.
Ding Xuefei looked at her blurry reflection in the glass and said softly, "The person I dated in college... was him."
There was a deathly silence on the other end of the phone.
A long silence stretched for over ten seconds, so quiet that Ding Xuefei could only hear his own anxious heartbeat and the faint static from the phone. He even wondered if the signal had been lost.
"...Brother?" Finally, Ding Xueji's voice came again, filled with a sense of shock and dazedness, her voice lowered, "You...you just said...you and Yu Songlin...used to...dated each other?!"
“Yes.” Now that things have come to this, Ding Xuefei is surprisingly calm. “We dated for a while in college, but then we broke up. This time on the show… we met again.”
“My God…” Ding Xueji murmured, her voice filled with the shock of her worldview being reshaped, “You…you and Yu Songlin…ex-boyfriend?! Such a big thing, and you kept it from me for so many years?! Ding Xuefei! Am I not your real sister anymore?!
Her voice carried a hint of reproach, but more than that, it conveyed a sense of bewilderment and disbelief stemming from information overload.
"I'm sorry, Xiao Ji," Ding Xuefei apologized in a low voice, "I felt there was no need to say it back then, and after we broke up, I didn't want to mention it at all."
Ding Xueji took several deep breaths on the other end of the phone, seemingly trying to process this shocking revelation. After a while, her voice rang out again, carrying a complex mix of emotions—concern, worry, and a hint of understanding: "So... during the time when things were going wrong at home, your bad mood wasn't just due to your parents' situation, but also this?"
Ding Xuefei remained silent for a moment, which was taken as tacit agreement.
“Brother…” Ding Xueji’s voice softened, filled with heartache, “So what are you thinking now? Are you two… going to get back together?”
"I...I don't know." Ding Xuefei sighed, laying bare her inner struggle. "I know I still like him, and he...I think so too. But Xiao Ji, you know, we're the same sex, and we're public figures...There are too many things we'll have to face if we're together, I'm afraid..."
“Brother,” Ding Xueji interrupted him, her tone becoming unusually serious and firm, “Listen to me.”
“I don’t care what others say, or whether Yu Songlin is a movie star or something. I only ask you, are you happy with him? I mean genuine, heartfelt happiness, not the kind of happiness that comes from being afraid.”
Ding Xuefei's mind flashed back to the moments he spent with Yu Songlin—those moments of excitement, sweetness, and even reconciliation after arguments. He couldn't deny it: "...Happy."
"That's enough!" Ding Xueji's voice was resolute. "Brother, live for yourself this once. You don't need to worry about me, I'll always be on your side. Who you like, whether it's a man or a woman, a movie star or an ordinary person, doesn't matter. What matters is that he's good to you and that you're happy."
His sister's unconditional support was like a warm current, instantly shattering Ding Xuefei's last hesitation and defenses. His eyes welled up slightly, and his throat tightened: "Xiao Ji..."
"Oh, brother, stop being so mushy!" Ding Xueji's tone regained its usual liveliness, trying to dispel the somewhat heavy atmosphere. "But seriously, you actually kept such a big secret from me! When you come back from filming the show, you have to treat me to a big meal! I'm going to 'interrogate' you about the details of your romance with the movie star back then! Oh, and remember to get my future 'sister-in-law' to sign a few more autographed photos for me!"
Ding Xuefei was both amused and exasperated by her younger sister, but deep down she felt an unprecedented sense of ease and determination.
"Okay, definitely." He agreed softly, a relieved and warm smile finally appearing on his lips.
After hanging up the phone, Ding Xuefei looked out at the boundless night, but felt as if a light had been lit in front of her.
He knew what he had to do.
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