Chapter 53 The Price Is No Matter Who Dies
An Yu... No, maybe I should call her Lin Chuyu.
The girl who had the same face as her in her previous life, but a completely different fate. The sister she had accidentally saved while investigating a case in Jianghuai, but who had since disappeared like a drop of water into the ocean, with no news of her since.
It turns out that she is back too.
"Why are you kneeling? The ground is cold." Shen Zhiwei stood up and walked in front of her, bending down and holding her arm.
Shen Anyu didn't look up, her hair hung down to cover her eyes, and Shen Zhiwei could only see her pale lips.
She didn't move, but instead lowered her head even lower, and said in a muffled voice, "Sister, I did something wrong."
Shen Zhiwei used some strength to pull the person up from the ground and pressed him to sit on the embroidered cushion next to him.
The little girl leaned into her arms, wrapped her arms around her waist, and buried her face in her shoulder, as if she had suffered a great injustice.
"How big a mistake could it be to make you do this?" Shen Zhiwei embraced her, gently patted her trembling back, and coaxed her in a low voice with a smile.
Shen Anyu was silent in her arms for a long time, so long that Shen Zhiwei thought she would not speak anymore. Then she choked and said, "I... I left my elder sister at the Lin Mansion and entered the palace myself."
Shen Zhiwei paused as he patted her back, then returned to normal: "Well, what then?"
This calm reaction made Shen Anyu choke. She raised her head, her eyes red and tears hanging on her eyelashes. She sniffed and said, "And... the frightened horse at the Western Suburbs Horse Farm... I did it."
Shen Zhiwei was silent for a while longer this time. She lowered her head and looked at her sister's face, which was almost exactly the same as hers, and was slightly distorted by excitement and fear.
A horse was frightened in the western suburbs. There were many guests at that time. If Xiao Wangqing had not reacted in time, the consequences would have been disastrous.
"Whose life do you want?" Shen Zhiwei wiped the tears from her eyelashes with his fingertips.
"It doesn't matter who dies!" Chen Anyu grabbed her sleeve fiercely, his eyes red. "Why should the two of them live peacefully? One imprisoned you, and the other pretended to be a good person! Only when they both die will there be peace!"
Shen Zhiwei's eyebrows twitched.
"……Why?"
"Why..." Chen Anyu forced a smile that was uglier than crying, but hugged her a little tighter, "Sister, you asked me why... Do you know? In my previous life, I almost died for you on the day of your wedding, wearing a phoenix crown and a red robe."
Shen Zhiwei took a breath.
The quarrel she had with Xiao Lingjun was ultimately of no use.
The little girl buried her face deeper, her voice muffled by the fabric of her clothes: "The Lin family... they treat me well. I never lack food, clothing, or daily necessities. Madam Lin even hired a female teacher to teach me music, chess, calligraphy, and painting. She always looks at me and sighs, saying it's a pity... what a pity? It's a pity that I'm not the real Shen Zhiwei. It's a pity that this face of mine can only be a shadow that cannot see the light of day."
"I didn't understand at the time, I really didn't understand. I thought I was lucky to be adopted by the Lin family and live the life of a young lady. I was even secretly happy, thinking I had escaped a disaster and didn't have to die with my parents..."
"Later... an imperial decree came from the palace, saying that the Crown Prince was selecting a concubine, and I was specifically mentioned." Chen Anyu pressed his body against hers, wrapping himself around her like a water snake. "On the day of our wedding, I wore my most beautiful wedding dress, covered with a red veil, and sat in the bridal sedan... I wondered what the Crown Prince would be like? Would he... like me?"
"If you ask for it by name, you probably like it."
"Until the bridal sedan arrived at the side gate of the East Palace, no one greeted me. Only a few unfamiliar eunuchs pushed me into a dark side hall and locked the door from the outside."
Shen Anyu's voice was tinged with fear. "I hid under the table and heard the shouts and clashes of weapons outside... and people were shouting... 'Protect the Crown Princess'... But they weren't shouting my name, they were shouting 'Miss Shen'!"
"Later... the noise gradually died down, and the door was thrown open. Those who came in weren't the prince's men, but soldiers wearing a different kind of armor... They were also surprised to see me. Then... then I was taken away and locked up in a separate courtyard. Later, someone brought me a lot of silver and told me that a new emperor had ascended the throne and I was free, but... no one could know of my existence."
She looked at Shen Zhiwei, tears streaming down her face even more fiercely: "Sister, do you understand? From the beginning to the end, I was just a stand-in, a fake ready to die for you at any time. Xiao Lingjun didn't want me, he wanted your face to protect him from disaster, to die for him! He hadn't even seen me, yet he could let me die without hesitation!"
"And Xiao Wangqing..." Her hatred turned to another person. "He saved me and gave me money, but he also sent people to monitor me day and night! Just because I look like you! Wherever I go, I feel like someone is watching me from behind... I'm like an object, being fought over and snatched away by them, but no one ever asks if I'm willing! No one treats me as a living person!"
Her sister was crying.
Shen Zhiwei felt a tightness in her chest. She opened her mouth but didn't know what to say. She could only take out a handkerchief and wipe away her little sister's tears bit by bit.
"I was jealous of you, sister. I really was." Chen Anyu turned her head and sniffed, her voice lowered, with a thick sob. "Why is it that with the same face, you can live so dazzlingly, get so many people's attention...even...even in death, there are people fighting for you. And I...I am like a shadow in the gutter, even living seems like a mistake..."
She grabbed Shen Zhiwei's hand that was wiping her tears, buried her face in her arms, and cried: "But... later I knew you were sick, knew you drank those medicines... I knew you were not doing well! I was no longer jealous... I just felt... I just felt sad... Sister, we look the same, why are our destinies so different... Why did they force us to this point..."
Shen Zhiwei cradled the trembling body in her arms, her chin resting gently against the crown of her head. She recalled the final days of her past life, bedridden and exhausted. It turned out that in another corner, this sister, so closely connected to her by blood, was also suffering in a different way.
"It's all in the past, An Yu," she patted her sister's back, her voice a little hoarse, "It's all in the past. In this life, I'm here and I won't let anyone bully you again."
Chen Anyu shook her head in her arms and raised her tearful face: "It's unbearable, sister... As long as they are still in that position, it will never be over! This time they pushed me out to die for you, what about next time? What means will they use against you next time? Against us?"
Her scattered gaze gradually focused, bloodshot eyes: "Sister, we can't put our lives in other people's hands anymore! Why? Why should we be frightened and have to look at other people's faces? You are obviously more capable than them! Xiao Wangqing is willing to share the military power of the Northern Frontier with you and listen to your opinions. He has you in his heart! As long as we..."
"An Yu," Shen Zhiwei was shocked and shook her head, "I understand what you mean, but this road is not feasible."
Shen Anyu wanted to say something, but Shen Zhiwei gently pressed her lips with her fingers.
"Listen to me. It's not a question of whether we can do it, but whether it's worth it," she sighed and explained as tactfully as possible. "For the sake of our safety, we're starting a war that spreads across the country, displacing tens of thousands of people, and reigniting border conflict... An Yu, we can't afford that price, and I don't want to."
Shen Anyu's lips trembled slightly under her sister's fingertips. She grabbed Shen Zhiwei's wrist, pulled that hand down and held it tightly.
"What about our price? Sister, do we deserve to be sacrificed? You always think about others, about the world, about the common people... What have they given us? The Lin family gave me fine clothes and delicious food so that they could fatten me up and die for you. Xiao Lingjun doted on you so that he could keep you by his side. Xiao Wangqing... Oh, he did help you, but how could someone who grew up in the palace be any good? He's nothing but a nest of snakes and rats!"
"We are also ordinary people, sister! Are the lives of two of us worth less than those of millions of people? Why should we repeatedly give in, endure, and use our flesh and blood to satisfy their ambition and greed?"
Shen Zhiwei was speechless by her question. She looked at her sister's red eyes, which were burning with hatred and resentment accumulated over two lifetimes, so hot that she could hardly look directly at them.
She couldn't explain to Shen Anyu the feelings those two people had for her. Feelings were the most illusory things and could not be considered a guarantee at all.
"An Yu..." She spoke with difficulty, her voice dry.
"Sister," Chen Anyu interrupted her, suddenly letting go of her hand, hugging her waist instead, and pressing his face against her belly. His voice softened, "Just think of it as doing it for me, okay? I'm scared... I'm really scared..."
Her shoulders trembled slightly. "I'm afraid that one day I'll wake up and you'll be gone again, or... or I'll be pushed out again and die with your name on my head. Sister, you're all I have... If even you won't fight for yourself, for us, what hope do we have left?"
She raised her tearful eyes, but her gaze was remarkably clear, without a trace of the coquettish confusion. "You say the price is too high, I understand. But sister, have you ever considered that if it were you sitting in that position, many things wouldn't require bloodshed? With your methods, you could easily accomplish many things without bloodshed. Xiao Wangqing... he has troops at his disposal, and he listens to you. That's the biggest bargaining chip. We don't need to fight, we just need... to have someone else sit there."
Shen Zhiwei listened to her sister's tearful plea. She raised her hand and stroked An Yu's soft head again and again, like comforting a frightened cub.
"Silly," she said, trying to soften her tone. "Who said we didn't fight anymore? Aren't we living well now? You're a princess now, and I'm Lord Shen, personally appointed by His Majesty. I live in the Qingliang Palace, clothed in fine clothes and fed with delicious food. No one dares to neglect me. Isn't this what we fought for?"
Chen Anyu shook her head violently in her arms: "This is different! Sister, this is different! These are all given by him, and he can take them back at any time! Just like in the past life... He can make me die for you with just one word!"
"An Yu," Shen Zhiwei held her face, wiped away her tears with her fingertips, and looked into her eyes. "Look at my sister, listen to me, this life is not the same as the last. Xiao Lingjun is indeed paranoid, and his methods may not be bright. But he won't treat you like that now."
She paused, then chose a more gentle approach. "If he needs me, he won't touch you. Besides, you're now a legitimate princess, with the Imperial Jade Disc. If he were to touch you, he'd be destroying his own kingdom, and no one in the court would approve. He wouldn't do such a foolish thing."
"With my sister here, the sky won't fall."
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The author has something to say: Shen Anyu is a pure hate kitten, it would be better if everyone except Sister started fighting.
Lin Wenyuan and his men slapped him once, Xiao Wangqing slapped him twice, and Xiao Lingjun even slapped him with the Eighteen Dragon Subduing Palms.
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