Chapter 38
I'm exhausted. I've gotten used to this feeling. Lately, I've been wandering in my dreams, only to find them gone when I wake up. I just feel empty inside, even my not-so-big room feels spacious. When I go out, I'm often in a daze, and I even ignore people calling my name.
"Qinghe? Qinghe!"
I snapped to attention and located the source of the voice: "Hello, Auntie."
It was my landlady calling me; I was standing at her door. At eight o'clock in the morning, I simply stepped out of my house as usual, and then I was left here. I looked in the direction of the voice; a dark shadow loomed behind her.
Before I could even see clearly, my landlady deftly shoved a box of egg tarts into my arms with lightning speed in the blink of an eye. I held it, unsure what to do with my arms. The aroma of the freshly baked tarts attracted a kitten.
"You two haven't met before, have you? I figured you're about the same age, and I haven't seen you go out with anyone much. If I've made any decisions that upset you, just say so. I just thought you two might become friends." The landlady patted my hand forcefully, pulling the young man who cast her shadow over her from behind me in front of me. "Mingyu, you have to seize this opportunity! You won't find another person this friendly around here in Qinghe!"
The opening remarks and compliments were very overly familiar. I felt a little awkward and touched my earlobe.
This was the dark figure behind the landlady. Although the weather was turning cooler, it wasn't to the point where one needed to wear all black to absorb heat. Normally, I would keep my distance from people like this, but this was a friend the landlady had helped me make, so I could only extend my hand and say, "Hello."
He didn't move.
The aunt left when we were face to face, and before leaving, she seemed to mouth something to the guy named "Mingyu". My hand remained silently between the two of us, ignored and unnoticed.
Maintaining the same posture was a bit difficult; my fingertips trembled slightly. Just as I was about to pull my hand away, he caught up and pressed it down. My palms felt slightly itchy. "My name is Shuangshan Mingyu. Shuang as in frost and snow, Shan as in cold mountain, that's my surname. The sound of ancient birdsong, the tinkling of jade, that's my given name." He tilted his head to look at me, his face peeking out from under the hood of his sweatshirt. "And your name?"
I looked at his face and realized something.
"You were there that night...?"
He smiled noncommittally, his expression slightly mischievous. He didn't answer, and even though I recognized him, I wasn't prepared to admit that I was the one who had acted so awkwardly and strangely that night. I skipped over that: "Qinghe. Qing as in clear water, He as in river."
“You gave a very detailed introduction, and I enjoyed listening to it, but I still have to say, of course I know you.” He quickly replied, smiling and revealing his sharp teeth, “The clear river in the mountains, rinsing the stones and resting the pillow under the moon, on a clear night it becomes a jade earring.”
He probably wasn't talking about haiku. Haiku are mostly in the 7-5-7 syllable pattern. I didn't understand what he said, so I stood there thinking about other things. My landlady rarely calls me except to deliver snacks, and when she does, it's a huge hassle for me. Shimoyama Meitama. Why did the landlady want me to meet him? Is he from out of town? Does she want me, someone who's also from out of town, to show him around? I haven't been anywhere yet. I took out my phone to search, and he curiously looked at the map beside me: "Aren't you going to invite me to your place?"
...
This is so abrupt.
I looked up at him and scrutinized him, but I couldn't see a trace of intellectual disability in him. He was probably just joking. I chuckled dryly, "Your aunt wants us to stay together, is there anything you want to do?"
He raised an eyebrow, seemingly somewhat displeased, but said nothing. I figured if he didn't say anything, it was fine; after all, I really didn't want to bring him into my rented apartment. We weren't that close yet, so I didn't intend to play the role of someone who could read between the lines. He conceded a step: "Is there anywhere you'd like to go?"
I didn't want to go out; I wanted to go to class. The fifth and sixth periods at noon were practical classes, and I had to get there. My thoughts had wandered off without me realizing it. I might have been able to use this opportunity to change the subject, but he wasn't going to let me avoid it: "What are you thinking about?"
I told him about the course schedule, and he suddenly realized, "Then I'll go with you, Qinghe. You'll welcome me, right?"
I felt there was something odd about what he said; the tone and wording were somewhat familiar. Anyway, there shouldn't be anything else to do. If it's going to be in the afternoon, I'll just send him away early.
Today is Thursday again, the weekly "ghost sighting" day.
I haven't figured out how to project an image of being able to have a back-and-forth conversation like a lunatic in public.
Shuangshan Mingyu started chatting with me in a familiar tone: "Is your name on the school bulletin board? Is your class in room xxx on floor x of building xx? If it's an activity class, then it's in laboratory xx."
I couldn't help but ask him, "Are you studying here too?"
“No, that’s not it.” He chuckled, his smiling eyes fixed on me. “Because I know you.”
What does this have to do with me? Could he have noticed me a long time ago and then used his vast influence to get around me? In light novels, even the most cunning characters only go to great lengths to pretend to be ordinary and surround someone because they've fallen for them. How could I possibly have had that experience? But I still kept a certain distance from him. Specifically, we used to walk side by side, almost hand in hand, but now there's a gap of more than a meter between us.
"How can you be so easily frightened?" He frowned, displeased. "Stand there, I'll come over."
"It's good that you're not scaring me." I said quickly, putting aside the matter-of-fact tone I sensed from him that I could be compared to Tachibana Miki, not wanting to suspect that he and the young lady were father and daughter. "Or you can go back, then you won't have to talk to me anymore."
He looked at me with a strange expression, the smile in his eyes sometimes seeming odd and sometimes innocent. He reached out and patted my head with pity.
Frost Mountain Mingyu smiled and said, "If only you were a little smarter. —Do you even need to be smarter?"
I fell silent. He didn't speak again, only wearing that enigmatic smile.
I shook my head, trying to throw away what he had thrown at me.
Of course I don't need to be any smarter; a person doesn't need that many things in life. Intelligence is useless, and if I could, I'd give it all to Charlie Gordon, pretending it's the flower I asked him to place on Algernon's tombstone—by then Algernon might not even have a tombstone yet.
I think of the dreams I have every night, each night filled with both sadness and profound peace. Joyful moments flash through my mind like a fleeting shadow, while the sorrow lingers like a sculpture. If I could, I wouldn't really want to be a fool, but if I could, I'd rather be one.
Do you think life will give a fool that many opportunities?
Before I knew it, I had blurted out what I was thinking. Frost Mountain Mingyu looked surprised, and after a moment of contemplation, she said seriously, "Even a fool could understand it."
I laughed silently. If a fool could understand this, he wouldn't be a fool. Thinking about it was useless. I tore open an egg tart and gave it to him. He stood there and slowly ate it, his movements swift and agile, even faster and stronger than my right hand. Crumbs rustled around his mouth, but he didn't notice. I pulled out a tissue to wipe them away for him.
He squinted, and I could see that his eyes were vertical pupils, an amber color like the warm winter sun.
Why would you want to wear all black?
I threw away the tissue and asked him.
“I heard from others that it’s cool, and some people say that black is too serious.” He said seriously, “I thought it was the first time I’d seen someone dressed like this, but it seems you don’t think so.”
He looked me up and down, his gaze sweeping from my head to my shoes: "But there's something interesting about me."
If a white short-sleeved shirt with black trousers can be considered stylish. The sun was very hot around nine or ten o'clock, so I deliberately didn't bring a jacket. When will it be deep winter? Should I buy a down jacket? The clouds in the sky are so beautiful. The road is a bit rough on my feet; it wasn't before. The path shortened with our casual conversation; the school gate was in sight, and the ginkgo trees were exactly the same as the day I met Gu Xinglian.
Shuangshan Mingyu followed my gaze and asked, "I've heard that human milk tea is delicious. Would you like some?"
I replied without any change in expression: "No."
I asked, "Are you still planning to go to school?"
"Yes, I'd go anywhere if I could be with you," he said, but his eyes, gleaming with a sly light, seemed to say something else entirely. I glanced at him hesitantly, and he looked at me smugly, "Have I finally piqued your interest?"
I nodded calmly, sorted out everything that had happened in a short period of time, and realized that he had only been teasing me from beginning to end. Fortunately, no one was hurt: "Then you can go."
He was somewhat surprised, his eyes widening: "Why do you want me to leave? I can go anywhere with you, as long as you want."
He looked puzzled, and even his natural cunning disappeared.
"Mr. Shuangshan, we'll have a chance to meet again." I felt a little agitated; no one knew where it came from. The rapidly flashing thoughts made me realize how important they were, and I remembered I needed to drink water later.
Then I said, "Time doesn't stop for our temporary separation; we'll meet again when it's time to meet."
That's right.
For a liar.
I don't know its real name, how it bewitched the landlady, or whether it only became interested in me after possessing Tachibana Miki. I don't mind being a fool; the only thing I mind is that egg tart. I thought we could truly put aside our past grievances, for example, that I could use physical contact to gradually extract the seed.
I need to make Tachibana Miki pay more attention.
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