Chapter 166: The last spiritual senior sister's experience before she arrived.
One hour ago.
As the water rippled outwards, the chaotic and jarring atmosphere subsided, and the surrounding noise gradually subsided, like rain merging into the boundless sea, leaving only desolation.
Qiao Yanshen opened her eyes and landed steadily on the ground. A faint blue light illuminated her clothes, and a small ball of light swam past her eyes, approaching her. In the blink of an eye, a shimmering butterfly emerged from the ball of light and gently landed on the tip of Qiao Yanshen's nose.
Its wings fluttered slightly, as if trembling as if about to shatter at any moment. Soon, the butterfly flew away, transforming into a bright, soft light, joining countless other specks of light as it moved through this dark and damp place, which resembled the bottom of a valley.
Qiao Yanshen turned around and saw a precipice behind him, with a magnificent waterfall splashing white mist-like water beside it. A chill ran through him, and all was silent.
This is... Luochuan.
She quickly made up her mind and slowly walked forward. In her memories of her past life, she had been fortunate enough to glimpse a bit of the scenery of Luochuan, and it was just as secluded and profound. Even the most brilliant words could not describe the tranquility that was so closely linked to death—the entire continuous river was itself a cycle of death and life.
A faint, cold light shimmered all around, as crisp as a frosty morning.
But a suppressed sob led her forward.
This wasn't the first time she'd encountered something like this; it usually meant she needed to be told something. The flickering blue light, like will-o'-the-wisps floating on the River Styx, was completely drawn away by the sobbing.
The road ahead was slightly winding. After walking for a while, Qiao Yanshen felt the sound getting closer. He slightly turned to the side and hid behind the stone wall.
A huge curtain of water hangs before our eyes, obscuring the cave behind it and making the scene inside indistinct.
That's strange.
Everything here is silent. Whether it's the waterfall or the flowing water curtain, it's clearly living water, yet it's like a dead person, silent, exuding a cold, withered chill, devoid of any life.
Therefore, the intermittent, sorrowful sobs sounded even more abrupt.
A figure knelt before the curtain of water. The water was hazy and soft, and the scene was filled with a desolate and melancholic coldness, except for her, who stood out as a pale white figure, making her seem particularly frail.
But what was even more striking were the tears clinging to her cheeks. As she lowered her head, a tear glistened, then fell, dripping onto the object she was holding in her arms—
On a pile of broken and fragmented things.
Those things were so terrifying that the only word to describe them was "creepy." From this side, Qiao Yanshen could see specks of reddish-brown and bluish-purple on them, spreading out like veins, just like human meridians; the surface was pale and slippery, with several broken parts revealing bloodstained bones.
It looked like a corpse that had been mostly eaten by wild animals.
Luo Yang held it as if it were a frail child. She seemed to use immense willpower to suppress the churning pain in her throat before raising her head.
"How can I save her?"
As if afraid the other party would immediately refuse, Luo Yang added, "She cannot be reincarnated like this... You should understand that ordinary people are born whole, but her soul was already separated before she was born..."
She held tightly to the damaged object in her arms, which resembled snow.
"If we insist on extraditing them, whether in the next life or in the years to come, they will only be born with intellectual disabilities, and may even gradually disappear..."
After she finished speaking, the young woman took a deep breath, swallowed her tears and sobs, and waited silently and stubbornly. Even kneeling in front of the water curtain, her figure remained perfectly upright, without the slightest wavering or bending, revealing an almost obsessive stubbornness.
Qiao Yanshen sighed inwardly, then hid behind the stone wall and quietly waited with her.
After an unknown amount of time, a sound finally came from within the water curtain. The sound was muffled, but it was very familiar.
Qiao Yanshen was stunned. After a moment, she remembered why it sounded so familiar—why did it sound so much like her mother's voice when she was in another world?
She pondered for a while, then felt that it wasn't quite the same; it was probably just that they had a kind of calm and aloof feeling that was somewhat similar.
“I rescued you from the water, not so that you would degrade yourself into this withered state.”
The voice carried a chill, vaguely resembling anger and disappointment. As Qiao Yanshen listened, he subconsciously felt a bit breathless, and unconsciously clenched his hands, his nails digging into his palms.
She bit her lip tightly, her brows furrowing as if they were about to knot. This feeling of rejection—she used to dread hearing it most. If she didn't do something well... if she did it poorly enough, she would receive this kind of blame.
After growing up, Qiao Yanshen deliberately reduced contact, and thus stopped hearing from him. Unexpectedly, now in another world, he was being caught up by something he thought he had long since abandoned.
The person behind the water curtain continued speaking.
Qiao Yanshen was now fully conscious and his mind was working quickly. He had just pieced together the time from the scattered clues. At this moment, Luo Yang was still in Luochuan and still guiding others, not to mention the tragic state of this soul...
It was not long after the war began.
The conversation grew increasingly cold. At this point, nothing should have happened yet, but the person seemed to possess precognitive abilities, even recounting most of what would follow:
"Previously, you fulfilled the wishes of the souls who did not wish to be reincarnated and secretly built a world for them without my knowledge."
"From now on, you will keep dissipating your cultivation, just to fulfill other people's wishes. And there was that time you slipped away from Luochuan... Never mind, there's no point in dwelling on these things. Luo Yang, do you think that losing your cultivation and divine sense is nothing, that you'll recover sooner or later?"
—Are you talking about Shen Yuan's time? But that shouldn't have happened yet.
"Your constitution will become increasingly weak, and you won't have many years left to live."
Most mothers would never want their children to drive them to their deaths.
Qiao Yanshen understood the meaning behind her words, but Luo Yang ignored him, her eyes still bright and firm, and asked only one more question: "How can I save her?"
After a long silence, the other party said softly, "What if you were to use your own meridians to make thread and sew it up for her by hand?"
That was a secret method of the Kalan people, which had existed since then. Removing the meridians was already extremely painful, let alone personally making the threads and sewing them into her body.
It's really...too cruel to myself.
Qiao Yanshen already knew the ending, his heart filled with mixed emotions, and finally he closed his eyes. Before Luo Yang could answer, the man asked again, "Do you intend to do the same if someone similar to her appears in the future?"
"Besides, since you've taken her in and left her in Luochuan, you're following the will of Heaven, and she'll be going to fight in the future. There are more and more people like her. Even if you're overflowing with pity, how many lives do you have left to squander, Luo Yang?"
Luo Yang lowered her head and pursed her lips. The question seemed too sharp, leaving her momentarily speechless. Qiao Yanshen sensed her heartache and didn't know what to say, only feeling that this illusion was far too long.
Everything about Luo Yang felt too long and too complicated to her.
As she wished, everything around her began to dissipate, and the water curtain gradually faded. Just when Qiao Yan thought that Luo Yang had been rendered speechless and that everything had come to an end, the young man raised his head again, his hands trembling as he tightly embraced the remnant soul in his arms, his eyes no longer filled with tears.
She said, "I'm not going to join the war; I'm going to end it."
If she hadn't harbored such intentions, she could probably have continued as the ruler of Luochuan, only getting caught up in a future power struggle over life and death, without losing her life. However, Luo Yang spoke so firmly, so firmly that Qiao Yan knew that from this moment on, she was determined to end this absurd and endless war—no easy task indeed.
But Luo Yang insisted on doing it.
All the bitterness and pain that followed seemed self-inflicted, and the love that had been secretly suppressed in her heart never had a chance to be spoken.
Like a flower, it sprouts, grows stamens, and reaches its peak, but in the end, it always withers and decays.
That's pretty much the kind of person she is.
The illusion dissipated, and the paleness vanished. Luo Yang, however, remained, tears still streaming down her face, as she turned to meet her gaze.
Qiao Yanshen stopped hiding and slowly walked out. She hadn't seen Luo Yang for a long time. Ever since the last time Luo Yang wielded her sword to shield her from the heavenly tribulation, it had all been just a hallucination born of pain.
“The ancient aura drew me out,” Luo Yang smiled. “Let’s get straight to the point.”
They didn't have much to say to each other. Qiao Yanshen nodded silently, and Luo Yang waved her hand slightly—
A clear picture slowly took shape as the water flowed from the side. The water rippled gently, so ethereal that it seemed less like water and more like dancing, cold flames. Qiao Yanshen gazed at it intently, and suddenly understood Luo Yang's intention.
The living water gushes forth, flowing through all time and space, encompassing the universe and giving birth to all things. Sometimes surging and powerful, sometimes gentle and silent, it transforms from turbid to clear, ascending to heaven and descending to earth...
Wearing, clouds, rain, river.
The lake's surface is like a mirror, while the ocean's waves are majestic. Hence, the two styles of "marsh" and "sea" are derived from this.
The water eventually returns to the bottomless Luo River, which is the abyss. Thus, the final move takes the single character "Yuan" (abyss), marking the end of the Luo River Technique, yet also serving as its starting point due to the ceaseless cycle of water itself. All the waters and marshes of the world are encompassed within this sword technique, even surpassing the legendary Taiyin Lord who is said to control the origin of water.
Even after grasping the basic principles, her divine sense couldn't withstand such immense weight. She barely grasped a fraction of the fifth stance's essence before Qiao Yanshen felt a sharp pain, followed by warm fluid flowing from her seven orifices, the stench of blood instantly filling the air.
She coughed up a mouthful of blood and heard Luo Yang say helplessly, "Don't try to understand it anymore. Just write it down and think about it later. There's no rush."
Just watching was enough to create immense pressure. Luo Yang truly understood Qiao Yanshen and knew her limits. The forced memorization caused her sea of consciousness to crack under the unbearable strain, with relentless, excruciating pain and cold sweat soaking her palms. Qiao Yanshen bit her lip, unable to even groan, only enduring the pain with a pale face, continuing to force herself to memorize.
Luo Yang clearly sensed her pain, but said nothing, only watching the young man's trembling figure.
She hesitated slightly, wanting to reach out and support Qiao Yanshen, but he raised his hand to block her.
His white robes were stained with blood, leaving behind scattered petals. Qiao Yanshen's voice trembled, yet it still couldn't hide his coldness:
"Don't touch me."
Luo Yang's hand paused, and she silently withdrew it.
After confirming that Qiao Yanshen had memorized everything, the water gently dispersed and returned to its original place.
She swayed twice, barely managing to regain her composure from her nearly scattered consciousness, and slowly stood up. Her ability to endure pain had increased day by day along the way, and she had gradually become accustomed to recovering quickly from it.
This is not a good thing.
"I'm sorry," Luo Yang said softly. Of course, she knew she had been too cruel to Qiao Yanshen, just as she had been to herself in her previous life.
Qiao Yanshen slightly raised her eyes, saying nothing. She probably couldn't say anything either, only breathing softly to calm the piercing pain emanating from her soul. With Luo Yang protecting her, she wouldn't suffer any irreversible damage, just unbearable pain.
It's probably not much different from the pain of having your meridians pulled out of your body.
"I probably can't make you happy anymore." She lowered her eyes, a cluster of blue light emanating from her fingertips and entering Qiao Yanshen's body. "This is my last bit of divine consciousness... You should know how to use it. Just remember, once you use it, there's no going back."
“I hope you never have to use it—because it means you’ve hit a dead end. Yan Shen, I hope you’re safe.”
...Now, she couldn't even define Luo Yang's words as a lie. She genuinely hoped so.
Qiao Yanshen turned his head, his gaze fixed on the distance, and instead of responding to her question, asked, "How do I leave here?"
Luo Yang smiled slightly and said, "I'll see you out." She took a step forward and put her hand on Qiao Yanshen's shoulder.
"I will give you my ten years in the capital in my dreams. Because from the very beginning, you never had a life of your own."
"But there will be a time when it happens. I cannot make my own decisions in this life, but you... you definitely can."
—My own life?
Before she could ponder the meaning of those words, a familiar sensation of spatial shifting washed over her.
Qiao Yan closed her eyes. When she came to her senses again, she found herself in a vast, sandy plain. There was no one around, and in the distance, the light of spiritual energy clashing rose and fell.
Luo Yang's figure disappeared, and she suddenly felt a pang of regret, yet she didn't know why. —What more could they possibly have to say to each other? Luo Yang had promised to love her in a dream, but in the end, everything related to her only left her with scars.
But she also understands Luo Yang.
A soft sigh escaped her lips without her even realizing it. Qiao Yanshen raised his hand and gently stroked the spot where the young man had just rested his hand on his shoulder. Then, he released his sword and headed towards the area where the spiritual energy fluctuations were intense.
-
In Luochuan, after the young man's figure disappeared, Luo Yang remained standing in the same spot, his gaze quietly fixed on the water curtain.
"How long are you going to hide?" she asked. "Come out."
Behind them, a figure emerged from between the stone walls. The familiar mockery in his blood-red eyes was gone, replaced by darkness.
"Isn't she just like you? Why put on such a pretentious act?"
Luo Yang raised an eyebrow. "You've changed. You're really rude now."
She said slowly, "She is herself, not me. There's a limit to how much you can misunderstand things."
Luo You raised her hand and gently pinched her brow, saying in a deep voice, "You're lying to me. After regaining her memories, she is you."
She had long since lost her emotions and could no longer understand the complexities of the situation; she stubbornly believed that the two were no different, except that the other lacked memory. Having said that, Luo You gave another disdainful laugh, her voice suddenly turning cold.
"You deliberately showed me this past, didn't you? Did you want me to praise you as a saint, teacher?" Something was breaking out in her heart, causing her usually unchanging tone to subtly distort.
"Now that you've been resurrected, what do you intend to do? — Will you go and save the people of the world, kill all the Luochuan citizens who were once banished because of you and are now labeled as 'demons,' or what?"
Hearing her questions, Luo Yang's usually calm expression finally cracked. She pursed her lips and after a long while said gently, "You're wrong, you're both wrong."
“I am neither a saint nor will I be resurrected.” Her voice gradually softened. “I don’t want to be resurrected either, Ayan.”
That last soft call seemed to touch the deepest, most delicate string in Luo You's heart, causing him to pause slightly.
Luo Yang named her You, forgetting that she also had a character in her name, Yan, meaning peace and tranquility. However, fate treated her differently; whether she arrived broken and shattered or was unable to sleep afterward, it had nothing to do with this name.
"What......?"
“I will not be resurrected,” Luo Yang said firmly. “I will grow and improve along with that child, gradually crumbling away until I cease to exist. I will become a part of her.”
"This is my destiny, and also the best outcome. They are just themselves, and will no longer be me and Ling Guangjun."
“Ah Ying will be like me. I can feel her fading away too, perhaps even faster than me. What awaits us is emptiness, but if she were here, I wouldn’t be so afraid.”
“Ayan, you don’t remember anything. But if you ever remember, please take good care of Mingjing and Canghe for me. They can’t live without you.”
Before she could finish speaking, she was interrupted by Luo You's murmur.
"No...you won't die. How could you die? Even the cycle of life and death is in your hands, how could you—"
Towards the end, his tone became almost a roar. Something was about to grow from his empty chest, but it wasn't out of love; rather, it was a sea of hatred.
"You're lying to me—you must be lying to me! Just like before!"
No matter how much she shouted, Luo Yang simply raised her hand and sent her out of the illusion with a beam of blue light.
The restlessness in my heart gradually subsided, and a wave of ashen despair washed over me.
Luochuan in my sight swayed and collapsed, all familiar scenes gone. All my childhood memories shattered in Luo Yang's vanished figure.
That was her hometown, a place she could never return to.
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Author's note: Adding some information about my senior's experiences.
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