Chapter 191
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Xia Lingjun looked at him in disbelief. When had he become so polite? It was true that you couldn't fathom a pervert's spiritual depths. It seemed she had to understand everything about his past and find the source. She coughed lightly, adjusted her tone, and asked, "Are you Yun Lieting?"
Anger showed on the man's face. He gritted his teeth and was about to lose his temper, but he saw her giving him a warm, encouraging smile. He lowered his head slightly, was silent for a while, and then nodded.
"Then why don't you even dare to admit it yourself? If a person can't admit it himself, how can he expect others to admit it?"
"I don't need anyone to acknowledge me, and I don't need myself to acknowledge myself, Jun. You're taking things too far." A cold glint flashed in Yun Lieting's blue eyes. He clenched his fists and stared coldly at Xia Lingjun. His gaze chilled Xia Lingjun. She smiled and said, "You don't need others to acknowledge you, but you must acknowledge yourself, because your heart longs for a sense of recognition."
He was stunned for a moment, and his fists gradually loosened. He really longed for a sense of identity, but he could not find a sense of identity or belonging in everything he did. He didn't know why he was born, why he did what he did, or what path he should take in the future. Whether it was the past, the present, or the future, he was very confused. He had to keep doing research and creating to change this confused and empty state of existence, otherwise he didn't know why he was alive. He was the top existence on earth, he could get everything he wanted, but he couldn't find himself.
She watched his face darken, his brows drooping slightly, his bright blue eyes looking so melancholy, she even felt a pang of heartache. Looking at his expression, she knew she had guessed wrong, she must have touched a chord in his heart. Damn! I'm really amazing, I can actually make a crazy guy feel less crazy. She tried to make her tone as gentle as possible, her soft hand holding his, "Can I call you Yun Lieting?"
The man raised his eyes and shook his head, "No! I still like you to call me 'husband'."
"Okay! Husband, can you tell me about your past?" Xia Lingjun patted his hands as if to comfort a child. In fact, every man looks like a child at certain times, but some men hide it deeply, and some men show it on the surface. They also yearn for warmth.
His brows furrowed tighter and tighter, his face darkening. He pointed at the beauty on the bed and said softly, "Do you know who she is?"
Bullshit! Xia Lingjun muttered inwardly, "Damn it! What the hell does she know?" She'd asked him countless times, and he hadn't said anything. He'd even asked her to help him first. But it looked like he was planning to tell her, hehe... I was just wondering. She put on a gentle front and shook her head, "I don't know. Can you tell me?"
He held her hand tightly, and tears suddenly welled up in his eyes. The tears flowed silently, and her heart skipped a beat. His tears, he could actually shed tears just like Feng Ming. Could it be that zombies can shed tears when they evolve to level nine, stage eight? He was choking with sobs, and the tears of a beauty always made people's heart ache. He buried his head in her chest, without a trace of obscenity. He cried for a while, and soon calmed down. He stood up and walked towards the beauty on the bed. He stretched out his hand and stroked her face quietly, "Yu'er, I'm sorry. After all, I hurt you. After all, I still couldn't save you. If you die, you will no longer suffer, but what about me? I can't extricate myself from the pain. I left the crowd and focused on research, so that one day I can save you. It's a pity that no matter how hard I try, you still won't come back, so I hate you, and I hate myself. I hate this world even more. I hate it more and more, and I lose myself in hatred. I don't know why I want to live. I originally wanted to destroy the world and then destroy myself, so that we can be together forever, but you are back, you are back again, you are standing in front of me alive, I look at you, I want to love you, but you are not you anymore."
Xia Lingjun was completely bewildered by his words. Holy shit! He was talking so much that she couldn't make any sense. She could barely follow the first half, but the rest was lost. "You're back, but you're not you anymore..." She shook her head, letting it go. Thinking about it made her head hurt, but she couldn't stop thinking. She wondered what he meant by that, who was this woman? Her headache intensified, and she felt a strong sense of suffocation. Her dark eyes, as deep as a pool of water, stared at the beauty on the bed. Her heart ached again. Who was she? Damn it! Who the hell was she?
"Ah—" The intense pain made her scream and fall down. Before she fell, she seemed to see the beautiful woman on the bed smiling at her. No! It should be that she was smiling at herself. What a weird feeling! Puff... she fainted.
When she woke up, she was lying on a clean single bed covered with pure white sheets. She slowly opened her eyes, and a ray of light shone in. Although the room was small, there was sunlight shining in. She felt a little pain in her head. She rubbed her temples, but heard a door open. A man came in from the circle of light, a man so beautiful that it took her breath away. She almost thought she had entered heaven and saw an angel.
"Yun Lieting." She struggled to get up. She was stunned. This person was actually Yun Lieting. He was not like the sloppy and nervous look when she first met him. His hair was combed neatly, with two strands of hair falling on his forehead. He was wearing a neat and close-fitting smoky gray sweater and a pair of jeans that were slightly faded from washing. He was smiling at her, and that smile was so beautiful that she couldn't look directly at him.
"Yu'er, you're finally awake." He walked over quietly, sat down beside her bed as if no one was around, and reached out to touch her forehead. "Well, you don't have a fever anymore. You're fine."
"What's wrong with me?" Xia Lingjun asked in confusion. This man actually called her Yu'er. What Yu'er?
"You are sick." Yun Lieting said.
Xia Lingjun's mind began to recall. Yes! That woman, she had fainted after seeing the woman named Yu'er. She looked at him with sleepy eyes, "Why did you call me Yu'er? I'm not Yu'er. You've got the wrong person."
"Yu'er, are you delirious from the fever? You don't even recognize yourself." He held her hand and tried to comfort her.
"No! My name is Xia Lingjun, not the Yu'er you're talking about." Xia Lingjun shook his hand away with all her might, pointing at him and saying, "What nonsense are you talking about? That's right! You're a psychopath. I can't believe what you say. I can't believe it."
Xia Lingjun curled up her body. She seemed unwilling to think about certain things, and was also afraid to think about them, because she couldn't figure it out no matter how hard she tried. She covered her whole body with the bed sheet, hiding inside the sheet and shivering. She was afraid, but she didn't know why.
"Yu'er, don't be afraid. I'm by your side, so you don't have to be afraid. I will protect you, forever." Yun Lieting picked her up from under the sheets. He wanted to pull the sheets aside to touch her face, but she held on tightly. He patted her back and said, "Yu'er, okay! I won't force you. Just, don't hurt yourself, okay?"
"No—" Xia Lingjun suddenly erupted with a powerful force. She struggled hard and pushed Yun Lieting to the ground. Her hair was disheveled, her eyes were red, her face was pale, and her lips were completely colorless. She pointed at him lying on the ground with a trembling hand and said coldly, "You are not allowed to call me Yu'er. I am not Yu'er. I am not Yu'er at all. I have my own name. My name is Xia Lingjun."
"Okay! Yu'er, don't be angry. I won't call you Yu'er. Isn't it okay if I don't call you Yu'er?" Pain flashed in his eyes. He stood up and wanted to support her, but she started crying, her shoulders shaking. His heart began to fear again. His Yu'er had just returned, and he couldn't stimulate her again. He looked at her and shook his head helplessly. "You clearly told me that a person should have the courage to admit himself, why can't you do it? You asked me to admit myself, but you just don't dare to admit yourself."
"Shut up!" Xia Lingjun cried hoarsely. "You're a lunatic, a lunatic. You're just trying to force me to imagine myself as someone else. Humph!" She snorted coldly and then shouted at him hoarsely, "You pervert, you psychopath, get out! I'm not afraid of you! No matter what you want to do to me, I won't be afraid of you anymore."
"But you are afraid of yourself." Yun Lieting sighed.
"What did you say? If you say it again, I'll kill you." Xia Lingjun suddenly felt a surge of rage, as if this man was determined to uncover some scar she didn't want to reveal. Holy shit! How could she believe the words of this psychopath? This man's words were just like his appearance, ever-changing. Who the hell knew if he was normal or just insane? She didn't want to listen to him anymore. She wanted to kill him right then and there.
"Okay! Yu'er, if you want to kill me, go ahead! I owe you this anyway." Yun Lieting looked at her quietly, then turned around, took a sharp fruit knife, walked towards her, and handed the knife to her. Then he took her hand and pointed the blade at his neck, "Yu'er, as long as you cut off my head, you can kill me."
"Don't force me. Don't think I don't dare." Xia Lingjun exerted force on her hand, and the bright red blood flowed down his white neck. The smoky gray sweater was stained with blood, forming blood spots on the soft fur.
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