Chapter 26. River Mist Sets Off the Flowing Water: "Hatred is the shackles the heart places upon itself."
"You still remember things from before?" Taiping's tone softened unconsciously.
“Of course I remember them all,” Shangguan Wan’er said.
"You came here today just to have Chongjian's fortune told?"
Shangguan Wan'er hesitated for a moment before saying, "Now that the Empress Dowager has moved the capital and paid homage to the Luo River, she is trying to undermine the Tang Dynasty. The princess should know the Empress Dowager's intentions."
Taiping raised an eyebrow, waiting for her to continue.
Shangguan was silent for a moment, then said, "With the passing of the imperial son-in-law, the Empress Dowager will surely arrange another marriage for the princess. Does the princess know who the imperial son-in-law is?"
Taiping chuckled self-deprecatingly: "Naturally, I'm a descendant of the Wu family. What, are you here to probe for information?"
She feigned composure as she looked at Shangguan Wan'er, but her mind was racing.
Shangguan Wan'er shook her head and said, "I serve by the Empress Dowager's side, so I know a little about it. The Empress Dowager intends to... betroth the princess to Wu Fengxian."
Fengxian was the courtesy name of Wu Chengsi, who was Empress Wu's half-nephew and was currently enjoying great influence.
Princess Taiping showed no unusual expression, suggesting she had already guessed. Shangguan Wan'er then added, "Chengsi is treacherous and cunning; I hope the princess will not agree."
Taiping was momentarily stunned: "I thought you came to arrange a marriage."
Shangguan Wan'er choked for a moment: "That's not what I meant."
"I understand, I'm tired, Lord Shangguan, please return." Taiping stood up, as if to see him off. But even after Shangguan had walked two miles, she still hadn't gone to bed. Instead, she paced restlessly in the corridor, not even noticing Xue Chongjian's hungry cries.
"Sigh!" she sighed. The child was already born, but this Shangguan suddenly appeared again! What did she mean by this?
Rationally, Taiping understands Shangguan Wan'er's nature. She values relationships highly, and the friendship from their youth is enough to motivate her to "kindly advise" her. However, emotionally, she can't help but feel smug. After all, Shangguan was willing to break the deadlock and even went out of her way to inquire about Chongjian's name, which proves that she cares about her to some extent, right?
This scene was Jiang Yan's solo performance, and Qin Lan also stepped down, drinking water while watching from above. Taiping was still in mourning, dressed simply, but every move she made exuded the air of wealth cultivated with gold and jewels. Many people questioned the casting of "The Age of Red Powder" because the role of Taiping seemed tailor-made for Qin Lan—a born noblewoman with a spoiled personality—while Shangguan Wan'er perfectly matched the pure and resilient innocent flower persona that Jiang Yan's team had packaged for her. The casting of the two seemed completely reversed.
The camera that took the Reuters photos followed Jiang Yan the whole time, and releasing this footage effectively refutes the doubts circulating online.
Qin Lan's eyes remained fixed on Jiang Yan. In the shot, Jiang Yan's brows furrowed at times, her lips curved into a slight smile; even the black veil couldn't extinguish the light in her eyes. Qin Lan couldn't help but think that although their characters didn't match, their emotional experiences shared common ground. She could portray Taiping's unrequited love very well, but Jiang Yan captured the very essence of someone experiencing unrequited love.
The surroundings were quiet, save for the sounds of machinery and the occasional sigh from Taiping. Everyone stared intently at Jiang Yan, their eyes filled with admiration and respect.
Qin Lan suddenly realized that Jiang Yan was a dazzling person. Stripped of her identity as her suitor, she was still the center of attention, the focus of everyone's gaze. This person was different from the one who had always been subtly and overtly sabotaging her before. It was as if she had fully blossomed in the past three years, composed and powerful, with an irresistible attraction in every gesture. In three years, she had managed to get a poster of herself on the posters outside major cinemas. Even when Qin Lan's fans and Jiang Yan's fans were arguing, they were too embarrassed to criticize her acting skills and could only repeatedly bring up the few resources that Jiang Yan had taken from her.
She was so striking that Qin Lan couldn't help but stare at her, watching her every smile and gesture in front of the camera, admiring her powerful aura, and seeing how her smile was like a painting.
＊
Filming went smoothly today, and we wrapped up after Jiang Yan's scene. Neither of them were tired, so they planned to take a walk in the city.
Ye Wei escorted them to the riverbank.
"Your name is quite nice." Qin Lan glanced at the river and thought of her name.
"Did you also think that my name was based on that line of poetry? 'Willows on the riverbank are like smoke'?"
"Isn't that right?" Qin Lan was a little surprised: "They all say you are Liu Ruyan of the Chinese entertainment industry."
“No, my name was given to me by my grandmother. It’s a line of poetry that she really liked.” Jiang Yan recited: “Wild colors swallow the mountains, river mist sets off the flowing water.”
Qin Lan silently recited it in her mind and praised, "What a beautiful poem and a beautiful name."
"Thank you," Jiang Yan smiled. They walked along the riverbank, the evening breeze gently caressing their faces.
“I think you’ve changed a lot since three years ago,” Qin Lan said thoughtfully.
"As Teacher Qin also said, three years have passed after all," Jiang Yan smiled.
"Then do you see if I've changed?" Qin Lan turned to look at her.
“Of course,” Jiang Yan said. “Teacher Qin is even gentler now.”
"..." Qin Lan had never imagined that the word "gentle" would one day be used to describe her, and she was quite unaccustomed to it: "Has there been a big change?"
"Not big, about the same as the Teacher Qin I first fell in love with." Jiang Yan smiled and shook her head: "Still so unwilling to admit defeat, with such a strong vitality that even the sun can't kill her."
“But I feel you’ve changed a lot.” Qin Lan pondered, “But I can’t quite put my finger on what’s different. It’s just that I feel… even if you had nothing now, like no career, no fans, no me, you wouldn’t be so devastated.”
"And..." she touched her nose, somewhat embarrassed, "Actually, the day you came to audition, I thought you were here to settle scores with me... I was prepared for you to become my enemy, but I didn't expect you to be so... so forgiving..."
"So, Teacher Qin wants to know why." Jiang Yan smiled and stepped onto the high stone steps.
The scene is recreated, but the locations are reversed. It's still the same river embankment, and Jiang Yan is walking on it with her hands behind her back.
Qin Lan understood why Jiang Yan insisted on holding her hand that day. From her perspective, she was always afraid that Jiang Yan would fall, so she couldn't help but reach out and support her, saying, "Be careful."
Jiang Yan was supported by her.
"Maybe it's because I've learned to give myself a sense of security," she said. "If a person hasn't learned to love themselves, how can they love others?"
"It's love again..." Qin Lan muttered. These people always have "like" and "love" on their lips, but she really doesn't understand what love is.
"Then tell me, what's the difference between loving yourself and loving others?"
Jiang Yan smiled.
"I used to envy the Little Prince because he had a rose that belonged to him. Later, someone told me that whether you have a rose or not, you are a prince."
“You said I’ve changed, but actually I’ve just learned how to rely on myself,” Jiang Yan said slowly and gently. “Maybe I haven’t learned it well enough, but at least now I won’t completely depend on you to meet my emotional needs. My friends taught me the most important lesson: true love is never about losing yourself. In front of you, I should first and foremost be myself.”
What Qin Lan didn't know was that after cutting ties with her, Jiang Yan had a mental breakdown.
Jiang Yan fell in love with Qin Lan during a low point in her life, and it was hard not to be attracted to her wild and vibrant life force. She told Yun Chui on the phone that Qin Lan was her emotional lifeline, but the Qin Lan who had saved her once no longer wanted her. She envied the Little Prince, who always possessed his own rose. Yun Chui let her drive, and two days later, her friend appeared before her across the ocean.
Jiang Yan lifted her tear-streaked face, and it took her a while to react: "Why are you here?"
Yun Chui sat down on the rocks, put his arm around her and let her lean on his shoulder: "Aren't we important friends? How could I not be there for you during the darkest moment of your life? Even if I'm not your friend, as Qin Lan's friend, I should help you. Old Qin... she's too straightforward and easily hurts others in relationships. We've known each other since we were kids, so I have an obligation to clean up her messes."
Jiang Yan's tears flowed again, a sharp pain shooting through her heart: "Don't mention her name..."
"Hmm." Yun Chui gently patted her back: "You've just completed the most difficult part of decluttering, you've done a great job."
"But I'm so sad, so sad." Jiang Yan stared blankly at the sea. "It's so cold... I feel like a part of me has died. Can you understand that feeling?"
“I can’t eat or sleep, and I feel like crying whenever I’m awake…” She covered her walnut-shaped eyes: “I feel hopeless about the future, I’ve lost the meaning of my life… I’ve lost her… I’ve lost her…”
She covered her face and wept bitterly: "Losing her is heartbreaking..."
Yun Chui patted her back gently, one pat at a time.
After Jiang Yan calmed down, she said, "I've walked this path too, so I can share some insights. First of all, I want to tell you that not every loss is a loss."
"At least through this incident, you've realized that you've lost yourself too much in this relationship. Everyone's spiritual world needs to be built on a certain sense of security, but later your sense of security was shattered by external factors, which is why you fell in love with the confident Qin Lan. You said you envied the Little Prince for having his own rose. But do you know, whether you have a rose or not, you are still a prince."
"Whether there are roses or not... I'm still a prince?" Jiang Yan murmured, "But I don't think I can, and I'll let my fans down..."
Yun Chui interrupted her: "Before you fell in love with Qin Lan, you lived a good life for many years. So you have the strength to walk on your own. What you need to do now is to refocus your attention on yourself."
"But that was because I hadn't met Qin Lan before," Jiang Yan said urgently, "Now I'm in love with her, and I've lost myself. I don't know where to go from here; the future is bleak..."
"Your future is bright and colorful." Yun Chui's voice remained steady: "No one is indispensable. If you feel that you cannot face the reality of your spiritual pillar collapsing, then imagine a scenario: when you stand up again, you will be successful and radiant, and your posters will be plastered all over the streets. When that time comes, Qin Lan will naturally see you again."
Old Qin has so many innate qualities. So if you want to attract her, you need to shine even brighter. She's indeed not very sensitive to emotional matters, but more so because love doesn't attract her. Don't let her sometimes slow-wittedness fool you; in school, she was always number one, never allowing anyone to surpass her. Whether it's talent or family background, no one around her can compare. That's why she's the proudest among us, because her confidence is built on wealth and talent. She's seen all the good things, so you need to offer something she hasn't seen before, something even better.
"Something better?" Jiang Yan murmured.
"The best thing is yourself. Someone like Qin Lan, who stands at the top of the pyramid, can only be worthy of someone who is her equal, not someone who needs to depend on her both materially and spiritually. You can't surpass her wealth in terms of material possessions, but you can make her appreciate your character, see your ambition, admire your resilience, and make her marvel at your ability to rise from the ashes of suffering."
"I'm not saying this to make you a better version of yourself for Qin Lan's sake. As an independent person, why don't you learn to walk independently first? Become a complete version of yourself first, and love will be the icing on the cake. You are learning to be your own anchor. Believe that when you truly stand firm, everyone who comes into your life will be a gift, not a piece of driftwood."
“Teacher Qin, you were once my spiritual belief.” Jiang Yan came back to her senses and smiled at her: “Even now, I find it hard to ignore the wild and vigorous vitality in you. It still has a fatal attraction for me.”
“I have changed, but that doesn’t mean I don’t love you anymore. On the contrary, I love you even more than before. I want Teacher Qin to know my little progress—if you leave me after filming wraps up, I will still be heartbroken for you. But this time I will not lose myself again. I will always love you and will always be true to myself.”
"I still think you're a bit too much of a romantic," Qin Lan muttered. "Why don't you hate me?"
“I used to hate you.” Jiang Yan smiled. “At first, I couldn’t accept it and thought you were really bad. You slept with me and then ran away, always trying to make up for it with money. But later, when I thought about it from your perspective, I completely understood your choice. You will make it up to me, you did what you could, and I can’t force you to be with someone you don’t like, after all, you hate me.”
“But you must be in a lot of pain.” Qin Lan looked at her guiltily. “I don’t understand why you didn’t resent or hate me at all during this reunion, and you were even very kind to me.”
“Hatred is a shackle that the heart puts on itself.” Jiang Yan smiled, looking down. “The past is the past, and what lies ahead is always a new life. If I kept clinging to the mistakes of the past, how would I have the opportunity to take a walk here with Teacher Qin now?”
She released Qin Lan's hand, tiptoed a few steps along the riverbank, lifted her skirt, and twirled. The buildings and fireworks across the river shimmered behind her like flowing stars. Qin Lan gazed at her speechlessly for a long time, his heart trembling.
The river breeze caressed their hair, carrying a delicate fragrance in the evening air. It was undeniable that Jiang Yan was incredibly alluring; she felt something stirring within her, making it impossible for her not to keep her gaze fixed on Jiang Yan.
“Let’s go back,” she said, bowing her head gently. “We have to get up early tomorrow.”
Jiang Yan jumped down and tidied her hair. Ye Wei's car approached from a distance, signaling. As Qin Lan reached for the car door, she was still pondering the question that had always troubled her: What is love?
＊
Filming ended early today. After the crew wrapped up, Yu Jintang declined the assistant director's request for a ride and wandered off to Los Angeles No. 11 Middle School by herself.
She wandered around the food stalls near the school gate for a while. Around 8:30, a group of students poured out of the teaching building, chatting and laughing as they walked towards the school gate.
Yu Jintang, with his hands in his pockets, leaned against a telephone pole, striking a pose, his fingers fiddling with a cigarette pack in his pockets.
She has a smoking addiction, but she has a very strong willpower. She can quit whenever she wants, and she will only smoke when she thinks of that person.
"Sister!" came an excited voice.
Yu Jintang snapped out of her daze as the girl with the ponytail ran over with her schoolbag on her back, her bangs swaying in the evening breeze.
Yu Jintang walked to the middle of the school gate, took off her hat, revealing green ear loops. Today she was wearing a sleeveless vest, revealing the flashy tattoos on both arms, and Martin boots with height-increasing insoles, which made her height instantly reach 1.8 meters.
"School's out?" She cleared her throat, her voice both fierce and hoarse. She reached into her pocket for a cigarette case, and accidentally dropped a shiny butterfly knife on the ground as she pulled it out.
The surrounding students all silently took a step back.
Yu Jintang calmly bent down to pick up the knife, stuffed it back into his pocket, turned his head to light a cigarette, and stared at several pale-faced boys in the crowd.
These kids were just released after being reprimanded by the police and are only coming to school today.
"Did anyone bully you at school today?" Yu Jintang exhaled a puff of smoke, her voice not loud, but everyone heard it.
A few seconds later, Lü Xi said, "No. Did you come to pick me up today, sister?"
“I happened to have some free time today, so I came to see if anyone was bullying you.” Yu Jintang glanced at the group of boys, then turned around, a cigarette dangling from his lips, took her hand, and swaggered away.
After crossing the street and walking a while longer, there were hardly any students in school uniforms around. Yu Jintang let go of her hand, stubbed out her cigarette, and threw it into the nearby trash can.
Lu Xi looked down at her wrist.
Will my sister still come to pick me up in the future?
"No," Yu Jintang said decisively. "No one else at school will bother you in the future."
Lu Xi stared at her retreating figure, hesitant to speak, before finally saying, "Sister, why are you so good to me?"
“No,” Yu Jintang said. “I was just doing my duty. Anyone else in the organization would have helped you get out of danger. You’re still a kid and don’t have the ability to protect yourself.”
"Then why are you still sending me to the film set?"
"Huh? Didn't you say you were bored staying in the hotel?"
"Sister!" Lu Xi's voice changed slightly.
“Okay.” Yu Jintang raised her hands: “I think you misunderstood because I wasn’t planning to talk about this, but now… because you remind me of my past self.”
"Then what about me...?" Lu Xi's voice was a little bitter.
“No.” Yu Jintang played with her lighter, the flame flickering between her beautiful fingers. Her words were gentle, but her expression was resolute, leaving no room for negotiation, which shattered Lü Xi’s heart completely.
"You can think of these two months as an adventure. During this time, I can be your older sister, nothing more."
＊
"Teacher Qin? Teacher Qin, Teacher Qin, Teacher Qin, Teacher Qin, Teacher Qin, Teacher Qin, Teacher Qin~"
Inside the RV, Jiang Yan called out in a drawn-out tone.
"What are you doing?" Qin Lan looked up, her pen still scribbling on the script as she thought about it.
"I want a kiss."
Qin Lan looked up and said, "Xiao Qing is still here."
Xiao Qing smiled blankly: "I'm actually not here, sister, you must be seeing things."
Qin Lan glanced at her again. "Then where should you be?"
Xiaoqing read three parts disdain, four parts aloofness, and five parts threat in that glance, and silently got up and got out of the car.
"You've been busy ever since you started your break." Jiang Yan pouted. "You're so busy, you haven't even glanced at me."
Qin Lan, feeling a pang of conscience, put down the script and asked in what she considered a very kind and gentle tone, "So what do you want to do?"
Jiang Yan stretched out her arms coquettishly: "I want a hug."
As soon as Qin Lan picked her up, Jiang Yan shivered.
"Did you get an electric shock?" Qin Lan was confused and wanted to let her go.
"No," Jiang Yan mumbled, wrapping herself tightly around her like a snake, and wriggling unsatisfiedly a couple of times. "Mmm..."
Qin Lan was taken aback, then laughed and cried at the same time: "Jiang Yan, can you please stop panting after just one hug?"
Jiang Yan said softly, "But if you touch me, I'll become lewd."
"???"
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