Chapter 331 Abnormal
The only thing she could think of was to separate, and live their own lives separately, without contacting or disturbing each other, as if they had never known each other, and let the grudges gradually fade away with the separation.
She couldn't take revenge on him, but she couldn't accept him anymore either. If she stayed with him reluctantly, she would only become more and more miserable, and he would be influenced by her and would one day lose his patience with her.
At that time, they will become enemies, reveal each other's scars, and hurt each other which will be the final outcome for the two.
However, she really didn't want to hurt him at all, nor did she want to erase his kindness to her bit by bit in her heart, leaving only a disfigured self in the end.
Huo Xilin was stunned for a long time after hearing what Xu Qingsui said.
He suspected that he was hallucinating and was unwilling to believe that these words were spoken by Xu Qingsui.
Seeing Huo Xilin remained silent, Xu Qingsui continued, "I don't want to live with you anymore. Let's do it later. Youyou is still your child. You can see him anytime you want. He has a phone watch, so you can contact him directly. As for us, we shouldn't meet again after the divorce."
Xu Qingsui said this with great pain. She didn't dare to meet Huo Xilin because she knew her heart clearly. If someone you truly love, no matter what the reason for separation or how long they have been apart, you will still fall in love with them when you meet again.
It was as if it was destined.
"Qingsui, I seem to be sick. I heard you say that you wanted to divorce me. It must be fake, right?" Huo Xilin asked in disbelief.
Before Xu Qingsui could answer, he muttered to himself, "I must have heard it wrong. How could you possibly divorce me? I must have heard it wrong."
He stood up in a trance, walked around the ward, and muttered to himself, repeating the words he had just said.
Xu Qingsui was frightened by his reaction. She quickly got out of bed, walked to his side, and whispered, "Huo Xilin?"
He suddenly froze in place, slowly raised his head, and stared at her, as if he was confirming something.
Suddenly he said, "You are not Xu Qingsui!"
After saying this, he added in a more affirmative tone: "You are not Xu Qingsui. My Suisui would never say that she wants to leave me, and she will never divorce me!"
He seemed to be trapped in his own world, and Xu Qingsui was frightened by his appearance.
She didn't expect that the simple word "divorce" would make him lose his mind.
"Huo Xilin, wake up!" Xu Qingsui called his name over and over again, hoping that he would wake up soon.
If something really happened to him, would she really feel good about it?
He looked as if he was mentally ill, which frightened her.
Fortunately, Xu Qingsui's call gradually took effect, and Huo Xilin's vision gradually became clear.
"Sui Sui?" His tone was full of surprise. He hugged her tightly in his arms and said with tears of joy, "That's great. You are still by my side."
He buried his head in her neck, his warm tears seeming to burn her skin.
He whispered in her ear: "You know, I thought you were gone just now, and I was so scared that I looked for you everywhere. Fortunately, you are still by my side, Qingsui, I beg you, promise me that you will never leave me..."
He whispered in her ear over and over again in a humble tone, asking her not to leave.
Xu Qingsui finally softened his heart and seemed to understand why he installed a positioning chip in his body.
Am I really that important to him?
After Huo Xilin recovered, he said to Xu Qingsui, "You were just joking with me about divorce, right?"
Xu Qingsui was afraid that he would become like he was just now, so he could only go along with him and nodded: "Yeah."
Huo Xilin heaved a sigh of relief, and then said seriously: "Don't joke with me like this again in the future, I will take it seriously!"
"If you take it seriously, will you agree to divorce me?" Xu Qingsui asked.
"Don't even think about it!" Huo Xilin said immediately: "Even if we die in this life, we will die together. As for divorce and separation, you'd better not talk about it, and don't even think about it. Such a thing will never happen unless I die!"
His attitude was so tough that Xu Qingsui knew that he was not joking and he could really do it.
He was obviously a man who told lies all the time, and she had already lost trust in what he said. But the strange thing was that she believed this sentence without a doubt.
Seeing Xu Qingsui remained silent, Huo Xilin became anxious. He hugged her shoulders and shook them gently: "Did you hear me? Don't say such things again in the future, and don't have such thoughts. Don't run away secretly again!"
"Do you know how I survived those three years when you were gone?"
Huo Xilin was unwilling to mention the scars of the past.
Because that is his vulnerable side, one could even say it is weak.
Especially in front of Xu Qingsui, he was even more reluctant to mention it, because he was afraid that she would look down on him in the future. In her heart, he hoped that he would always be the man who could protect her from wind and rain, indestructible, omnipotent, and without weaknesses and shortcomings.
But he knew that was not the real him, and Xu Qingsui would one day understand the real her. Instead of letting others tell her, it would be better for him to reveal his wounds to her himself.
He was selfish. He hoped that when she knew the impact her departure had brought to him, she would feel sorry for him, even if it was just a little bit, and he would be satisfied.
Xu Qingsui was a little surprised. He didn't expect Huo Xilin to bring up this matter on his own initiative.
She had a little understanding of Huo Xilin's life in those three years from the words of people around her.
But I've never heard him mention it before, so I can't help but feel curious.
"Can you tell me?" she asked him.
Huo Xilin fell into memories and spoke slowly in a sad voice: "Since you left, my world has lost its light. I live like a walking corpse every day. The only thing that keeps me going is the hope that one day you will reappear in front of me."
Huo Xi smiled bitterly at Xu Qingsui and said, "You may not believe this, but in the past three years, I have not had a good night's sleep. I have been suffering from insomnia all night long. I can only fall asleep by numb myself with drugs and sleeping pills."
"But even if I fall asleep, I still have nightmares. In my dreams, you leave me. I really can't live any longer. I don't know when I will die."
"Thank goodness, you're back."
Huo Xilin's eyes were red. It was the first time he was willing to shed tears in front of her. In the past, even if he cried in front of her, he would not let her see.
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