Chapter 416 Hardship
"She is not my first love." Huo Xilin said.
Xu Qingsui's face was full of confusion and a little bit of disbelief: "Not your first love? Isn't this a well-known fact? Even the employees in the company know about it. When she first returned to China, this matter caused a lot of uproar. You never denied it, did you?"
"Yes, everyone thought Yan Xisui was my first love, but she promoted this identity herself. I never admitted it, but I didn't deny it either."
"From the beginning to the end, the only person I have truly acknowledged is you, Xu Qingsui."
Huo Xilin's words made Xu Qingsui even more confused. She looked at Huo Xilin in confusion, and pondered over his words over and over again. She just felt that they sounded like the words of a scumbag.
"If you don't like her, just reject her directly. You don't admit it, and you don't clarify it. You just let this misunderstanding spread. Now you tell me that she is not your first love. You have never acknowledged her. Aren't you a scumbag?"
Xu Qingsui said speechlessly.
Although she didn't like Yan Xisui and minded the past between Huo Xilin and Yan Xisui, these were indelible facts.
If Huo Xilin was really a scumbag, then Xu Qingsui had misjudged him.
"I admit that I was a scumbag at that time, and I did things that were not very decent." Huo Xilin said, "Do you remember the time when you were my assistant? Everyone thought you were Yan Xisui's stand-in, right?"
Yan Xisui nodded: "It's not a feeling, it's a fact. Didn't you agree to sign a marriage agreement with me because I look like Yan Xisui? It's also a fact that you treated me as her substitute at the beginning."
This was just her stand-in, replacing Yan Xisui's position in their subsequent interactions.
Huo Xilin shook his head and denied her words: "No, you are not her substitute. I knew you earlier than she did. She recognized my mother as her godmother after I was taken away by my grandfather."
"That's right!" Xu Qingsui's eyes widened, and an idea came to her mind. She was shocked and incredulous: "Could it be that you..."
Xu Qingsui felt it was absurd to even say out loud such an idea.
For some reason, she didn't have the courage to speak out her guess.
But Huo Xilin continued what she hadn't finished saying: "You have never been Yan Xisui's substitute. On the contrary, Yan Xisui has always been your substitute!"
He said to her seriously, "Qing Sui, the first time I saw you, you gave me a different feeling than everyone else. I still remember when I was just brought to Grandpa's side, I was influenced by my parents and rejected many strangers, but only you made me want to get close to you involuntarily."
"Seeing you and Qin Fang getting so close, I feel sad and angry, and often wonder why I can't be your only friend." At this point, Huo Xilin couldn't help but smile.
"We were too young at that time and didn't understand what love between men and women meant. It wasn't until I was in primary school that students in my class began to imitate novels and idol dramas and write love letters to female classmates. Many female classmates would send me love letters and ask if I had someone I liked."
"For the first time, I learned from novels what love between men and women is like. It is different from the love between ordinary friends, different from family love, and different from friendship. Love is full of possessiveness and infinite tolerance."
"It was also from that moment that I truly understood my feelings for you. You have no idea how important you are to me. No one can replace you."
"Later, my mother took me back to the Huo family. When I saw Yan Xisui for the first time, I was shocked because her features resembled yours. I had reasons not to look for you. At that time, I selfishly wanted her to stay by my side. When I looked at her, it was as if I saw you!"
During those difficult days, Huo Xilin relied on Yan Xisui's face to ease his longing for Xu Qingsui.
After listening to Huo Xilin, Xu Qingsui was unable to come back to his senses for a long time and just felt it was a bit absurd.
"I know you find what I said unbelievable, but it doesn't matter. It's enough for me to understand these things. The reason why I am willing to forgive Yan Xisui's actions again and again, in addition to my mother's reasons, is because she is like you, especially when she was a child. She can hurt me, but she can't hurt you. So, Qing Sui, my tolerance for her ends here. If she doesn't stop, I will send her to jail myself."
Xu Qingsui didn't know what to say because she hadn't fully digested what he had just said.
Looking at Xu Qingsui's solemn expression, Huo Xilin felt a little regretful. He knew that telling her about the past would only make her feel distressed.
He didn't want to see her upset by the past events.
Huo Xilin sighed slightly and patted Xu Qingsui's back habitually: "Okay, it's getting late, go to bed early. We agreed that after work is done, I will take you to visit the old place again."
Xu Qingsui suddenly looked up and couldn't help asking, "You said you couldn't come to see me, what was the reason? Did you know that the Xu family had an accident? Did you know that I was adopted by the Lu family, and then I moved out of the Lu family to go to college, and... my engagement with Lu Jingyu?"
Her mind was in a mess, with countless questions popping up and she was desperate for answers.
She believed what Huo Xilin said, that she was very important to him, but did he know about her during the days when they didn't see each other?
Why do they all remember what happened in their childhood, but she has forgotten and can't remember it no matter how hard she tries? Is it fate's mercy to her, or is it fate's punishment for her?
Seeing Huo Xilin's hesitation and silence, Xu Qingsui seemed to understand something, but she was stubborn and wanted to hear the answer from him.
"Just tell me the truth. Compared to your truth, your lies are the weapon that can really hurt me."
Huo Xilin closed his eyes somewhat resignedly, then nodded and said solemnly: "I know, I have been paying attention to all the information about you."
Yes, even though Huo Xilin is not very old, the Huo family has always been at the top of the money and power, so it is very easy to get information about her.
"Qing Sui, something happened to the Xu family. I only found out about it later. I went to ask Grandpa for help. Although the Lu family later released Grandpa Xu and Grandma Xu, it was too late. They had already been persecuted by Grandpa Lu."
Huo Xilin looked painful: "I'm sorry, if it were me now, I would definitely be able to protect you all."
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