Chapter 112 Audience: Don’t stop!
[…
I rushed to the Black Tower, where Milan was lying in the four-poster bed that looked like a cage.
His hair was still black, and there were no wrinkles or fine lines on his body and face. He was still the same young man I had seen last night.
But his energy and spirit had waned drastically, a thick aura of death dotted his skin and bones, and he was wandering to the end of his life, like a berry that had ripened to the point of rotting, his black hair and white skin exuding a strange sense of surprise.
I knelt on one knee beside the bed, and the servants no longer stopped me. I felt a surge of anger in my heart again.
Why didn't you stop me like you usually do?
Why not?
Is it because Milan really can't survive and you don't need to protect her anymore?
I half stood up, Milan called my name with her eyes closed, and my knees dropped again.
His first words made me feel dry and painful.
He said, "You brothers' irritable personalities are really like being polished from a piece of bone."
I am taller than Joshua now, and I am still growing. The shape of my face and wings is different, but maybe in Milan's eyes, he never looks at my appearance, but observes my soul, character, and attitude towards things.
How terrible it was! I wanted so much to prove my difference in front of him, but the traditions of my family and the times constrained me rigidly. Until Milan entered its decline, I still stood in Josko's shadow.
I was so sad, I didn’t even know how I could be so sad. I couldn’t handle such delicate emotions at the time. They poured out from the bottom of my heart and almost suffocated me.
I struggled in the tide of pain and managed to utter a few questions.
I asked Milan, "Why are you dying? You are still in your prime. You shouldn't die at this time."
Milan closed her eyes and smiled with a sigh.
That laughter was brisk and penetrated into my heart as easily as a bird.
It was the first time I heard Milan smile in relief, but I wasn't happy.
When a bug sheds all its worldly burdens and is about to enter a place of eternal bliss, they make this sound. I have seen too many comrades die on the battlefield, and I have heard it too many times.
From that day on, I no longer thought that fighting in the starry sea and embracing death was something worthy of relaxation and glory.
Milan's passing has distorted my attitude toward death.
Death stood beside Milan's bed. Milan became generous and asked me, "Is this the last question you want to ask me?"
Then what can I ask?
What else could I ask?
Joshko was the terrible, inerasable rift between us. I stood in his shadow, his ghost living in my body, as if he had never left.
This is why I have kept my distance from the Black Tower in recent years. I am so afraid to hear someone say: Every time I see Joshua standing behind Milan, I take a glimpse and think Joshua is still there.
The more obsessed I am with him, the more I dare not meet him in real life.
Once I stand beside Milan openly, even my name will be swallowed by the ghost.
I am like a clumsy clock bird. Even when the time is up, I can't ask any other questions that go beyond the scope and can only repeat the time.
"Why are you dying? You are still in your prime. You shouldn't die at this time."
Milan's calm voice became softer and softer: "The last comrade I saw passed away this morning. I am the only one left of my generation. I don't need to hold on any longer."
I was in such a state of fear at the time that I couldn't think straight, but when he said that, my voice and tongue betrayed me and I immediately uttered a string of names.
Those were the Vespa veterans I found, I thought they were the soldiers.
After I finished reading it, I asked him, are they the bugs? Is it? I can let their relatives continue to live happily and enjoy their privileges.
After listening to this, Milan still had a smile in his voice. He said, "You are really good at describing courtesy as a threat."]
[It's over. I just thought there was nothing wrong with Joshua's approach. If I had the chance, I would 100% say the same thing.]
【＃Joshua is actually me＃】【Don't flatter yourself】
[I said no, no.
I said, "If this will keep you going a little longer, I'll do my best."
Milan said, "You haven't seen them in recent years. They left last year."
I remained silent.
Indeed, these old wasp soldiers only occupy a small corner in my memory. I don't care about them at all. With my current power, I remember their names. Even if they are dead, I can always dig them out easily as long as I want to.
If alive, look for the real body; if dead, dig up the ashes.
Milan once again grasped my heart at this time, and he said, "Yes, yes, it was not easy for me to hide them. You are so stubborn, and I finally found them out for you."
He worked that magic again, easily pulling the words out of my heart, reading me and understanding me with just a flick of his tongue.
I later found out that Milan had been competing with his family for years. Most of his social connections died after he returned to his family. Of the few that were left, he hid some and the family behind him took some away.
The Wasp Veteran I found was part of what he hid.
I said, I had no intention of hurting them.
Milan said, "I know that except for the first time you broke into the Black Tower which was my expectation, the other times you were able to come up was because you didn't hurt them."
I was stunned.
Milan never closed his eyes. Once he was quiet, his anger seemed to disappear completely.
I immediately asked, "Who is the last comrade you care about? Maybe I can help. Anything is fine, family, legion, is he a wasp or some other species?"
Milan said, "Don't bother you. He has no family, no partner, and is all alone. He lived a carefree life and died peacefully. There is nothing to arrange for his afterlife."
But I didn't want to let it go. This was the first time I heard Milan talk so much, and the first time I heard his views on military wives. I wanted to hear more.
With one more name, I can pick up a shadow of Milan in the old times.
I asked him, who was it? Tell me, he died cleanly and there is nothing I can do.
I said, "I can't do anything. I just want a name. A name is light and has no weight on my future."
Milan was much more tolerant today. I hoped he would reject me as usual, but I also hoped he would agree.
He told me that the last relative who died this morning was Theodore Foley, a Wasp warrior who retired normally and was an instructor on a recruiting planet, and died of old age.]
[……] [The supporting role of Slug Theodore is 10,000 times better than that of Li Tara. This is a damn thing that makes Master Milan worry about him for his whole life! ! F*ck!!!] [Is this what it means to be Master Milan’s relative or friend? Tears flowed from his mouth]
[The real Wasp Chief wishes you to be like the slug in the story. Since you dare to ask Fate for such a good welfare setting, then obey it one by one in real life, you ***!! ]
[I am 2000 moved. The position-changing battle is a fight to the death. One of the two group leaders must die to end it. How much do you like the chief of the Wasp Army to cheer him on like this? Are you a lesbian in the closet? ]
[Rank 3: SVIP tears up xx alliance: If he hadn’t died on the battlefield, and other high-ranking legions came forward to bail him out after the war, the Wasp Chief wouldn’t have to die.]
[Rank 7·SVIP Work Number: It is illegal to rashly interfere in the war of high-level legions. It is recommended that you do not make such a suggestion. ]
[Rank 3·SVIP tears up xx alliance: Who the hell are you? Don’t bark in front of me without a certified gold v, snort. ]
[Rank 7·SVIP work number: …]
[Jungleworm said that Chief Wasp may not be defeated, right? 】
[Hahahaha, you pure bug, Wasp Army, please use your main account to speak! ]
…
In a few seconds, a hot post quietly appeared on the Fit Forum [Holy crap! The top ten events of Fit Live! ]
Main post: Damn, didn’t Youchong guess that the top ten on the list were all submarines from the top ten legions? The third on the list has personally confirmed that only the legion numbers can be certified as gold V!
2nd floor: What a magical year 2000 was. This year, we could see that the Capital Alliance made a huge mistake in decision making in anger, the court lost a senior vice president in anger, and the Top Ten were just angry for a moment on the Internet. It was so funny. When the legions get angry, they compete in cultural eloquence output.
…
@Fite: […
I'll make a note of this name and I'll be sure to look it up later.
After Milan said this, his breathing became weaker and weaker, and I could clearly feel that with every breath he took, more of his life was slipping away.
I wanted to reach out and cover his mouth and nose to stop him from breathing.
But how can you live without breathing? The hand I stretched out finally fell into his hand.
His hands were thin and cold, with no flesh on his fingers and obvious knuckles, like branches cut from a garden.
The touch he gave me was so horrible, fear was gnawing at my hands, and my instinct was warning me to stay away from Milan, because if I didn't leave now, I would not be able to leave.
Like a fool, I forced myself to say, "It was only one day after Christmas."
He didn't answer me.
I asked again, "Why do you always keep the window open? You open it in spring, summer, autumn and winter. It's snowing heavily outside, and your hands are so cold. Do your bones feel uncomfortable in the frost season? Is the heating in the bedroom too low? I'll ask Chong to continue installing new temperature control equipment, okay?"
Milan was still again. He asked me, "Is this your second question?"
I wanted to say no, can I ask a few questions? Will you leave after that? But I didn't dare to say no, because if I said no, Milan would ignore me.
I could only respond, “Yeah.”
Milan was breathing very slowly. I needed to get closer to hear his voice. I sat on the bed and put my ear close to Milan's lips. The military cape covered half of Milan's body like scale wings. This scene made me uncomfortable. Why did it happen at this time?
He said, "Opening the window is like listening to the sounds of the four seasons. I was born on a planet called War Mars, where the four seasons are out of balance, there is no spring or winter, and it is hot all day long. Later, I served on the Wasp's stationed planet and never left the medical city there. The temperature in the medical city is controlled all year round, and there are no seasons."
I didn't expect this to be the reason. I was stunned for a moment, and then I thought of a detail.
How amazing! I was able to understand the meaning of Milan's words with divine help.]
[You ****, stop flattering yourself. Just take a walk with your stupid and idiotic operation, Fate! ]
[Take a one-on-one tutorial from Teacher Fit. ] [Go to the next door to vote in the general election. ] [Don't bring up something irrelevant. ]
[The sounds of the four seasons. Spring is flowers that can be pruned by servants and brought indoors. Summer is breeze and heat. He can feel the seasons just by stretching out his hand. Autumn is fruitful. Servants can bring the fruits to his table.
Winter... Winter means snow. His legs and feet are inconvenient and the climate is not suitable. I also have back pain in frosty weather due to dislocated blood vessels and nerves. He cannot touch snow and ice. It is painful for him.
He can't see, so he can't look at the snow.
Milan has never seen winter.
I held his hand and let him touch my hair.
I said, "My hair is silver, snow silver."
He tilted his head towards me, and I said my brother's name, which I hadn't heard for many years. "My hair color is different from Joshko's. His is steel silver, and mine is like fresh snow, with a soft texture."
I finished speaking, and after a moment of silence, I said, "Milan, I am snow and Christmas, please touch me."]
[No wonder he broke down in the early part of the story. Joshua was so stubborn that he directly claimed that Christmas and snow were the secret words of love between him and Milan.]
[I had previously wondered how it was possible for Milan, who had just met Joshua, to give him a birthday present. It turns out that this one-arrow spirit had imagined it all himself!]
【I've learned a lesson. You can derive seasonal love words based on your hair color. 】
[Place an order for the new product from War Armor Paint Company right now, and I will quickly dye my hair in four seasons colors! ]
[Milan did not reject my move. I think he was out of strength. His fingers lightly hooked my hair and then dropped down weakly. He stopped talking and the rise and fall of his chest became shallower and shallower.
At that time, I was frightened and anxious, and I didn't dare to shout loudly.
There were therapeutic equipment around the bed, but they were not turned on and Milan never tried to use external technology to save himself.
There is no cure for the recession, and if he doesn't help himself, there is nothing I can do.
I held his hand, and all the suppressed emotions and pain over the years burst into my mouth. I suddenly said to Milan, "I hate you."
Start with a sentence, and the rest will be easy to say.
I told Milan over and over again, "I hate you, I detest you, I curse you."
Perhaps because of my absurdity, Milan's eyelashes trembled. He opened his eyes with effort, and his lifeless eyes moved slightly.
At that time, I even had a despicable thought: It’s good that you can’t see, you won’t see anything before you die, and you won’t see Joshko’s face at the end.
It's me who is cursing you, and it's me who is accompanying you through the last moments.
I squeezed his hand tightly, and his lifeless black eyes gave me a twisted sense of delight.
You feel me, Milan.
"I hate you."
I kept saying it over and over again until I almost believed it myself.
I said, I hate you, I will always hate you, and if time could go back, I would kill you the moment you were born.
At that time, my mind was burned by anger and pain, I babbled nonsense, and I wanted to pour out all the malice in the world on Milan.
Milan listened for a while, his lips moved slightly, and I stopped talking immediately. His voice was too soft, and I couldn't hear what he said anymore.
He called my name.
He said…he said he would not have a name in his family, nor would he have a place in the Warsaw family tree, he would just be a nobody, he said.
"I have no past, no future, Joshua, don't do this thankless task, don't remember..."
Milan didn't finish his words. He rested his face on the soft pillow and fell into a long and peaceful sleep.
I put my ear to his face, and his breathing and voice quietly disappeared from my world.
My dream has awakened.]
[My cheeks are sore after reading this. Can this book be published with a special chapter about the first encounter with Mr. Shimilan? ]
[Fate, you are a bug... Damn it, how dare you write about Mr. Milan like this!!! I can't find you, but I can't find your favorite? I'm going to stab the wasp next to me twice! ] [Rank 1·SVIP Standard A567:? ]
[I can't stand it anymore. I'm leaving. I can't bear to see you suffer.]
[Rank 3·SVIP tearing apart the xx alliance: I want to see Joshua slaughter Milan’s family immediately, right now! ] x10000 Mechanical Battleship·Noble special effects!
The super administrator threw a backhand punch: [-The live broadcast room is prohibited from instigating bloody violence, and the account that tears up the xx alliance will be permanently banned-]
[…] [Knowledge Company, you are really brave recently…]
[…
I'm sorry, that's all I remember about my first life. Only these are still clear. I can't remember anything after Milan left.
My memory of my first death is completely vague. My mental condition became worse and worse after Milan left. The only thing I remember is that after my death, I was cremated without the family flag.
Without the family flag, it means that I have been expelled from the family and will not have a good ending.
[Mr. Milan stopped the interview and we took an hour break. They came back and Mr. Joshua looked much better.]
…
Let's talk about rebirth. I can see from your eyes that you are questioning this statement.
When I felt it the second time and realized I was young again, I also questioned the memory fragments that appeared in my mind.
I was 15 when I first reborn.
At this point, Milan has not been found by his family and is still serving in the Wasp Army.
At 15, I initially rejected these memories.
When I was 15, I didn't report the memory of the Wasp Army hiding you, all because of... Choshko.
I was worried that if the "Mr. Milan" was captured and brought back to the family, according to the timeline, he would marry my brother and my brother would once again switch to the New Alliance.
So I keep silent and don't actively recall those fragmented memories.
But after a long time, I couldn't help it. At first, those fragments would occasionally appear in my dreams at midnight. I dreamed of what Mr. Milan said on Christmas Eve.
I was only 15 years old at that time, an age with high aspirations. I was very satisfied with myself becoming a lieutenant general at the age of 29. His Excellency Milan said that I was born on a festival when miracles were destined to happen.
I am quite proud of myself. I am a miracle. I will be one in the future and I am one now.
This was the beginning of my second downfall.
At 16, I had a brief growth spurt, a scaly winged larvae, and I had a high fever for two days.
It was this time that all those fragments of memory rushed into my mind with a high fever, and I felt all the emotions of General Joshua in two days.
When I woke up again, I couldn't tell whether I was the 16-year-old Joshua or the insane Admiral Joshua.
But at that time I felt that it didn't matter. I felt that I was reborn. I had a lot of experience and memory. I could become a well-deserved top warrior in this era. I could also reverse time and enter Milan's world legally.
I was going crazy with joy.
At the age of 16, I tried my best to use all means to go to the place where the Wasp Army was stationed through the relationship between the Warsaw family and my eldest brother.
The ostensible purpose was to socialize in both groups and discuss the increasing number of Alien Black Hole points in recent years. Before the Black Hole Gate appeared, Alien Tides were not that frequent.
Although the ten armies in 1600 were severely divided by race, they would not refuse to exchange information to preserve the safety of their fire and descendants.
My eldest brother put me in the First Army to serve as his temporary life assistant. I would never agree to this condition before, but I wanted to see Milan so much. I was only 16 years old at that time, two years away from the enlistment age. There was no way for me to contact Milan, so this was the only way.
The responsible bugs from various departments of the Wasp Legion will attend the exchange meeting. Milan Clement is one of the responsible bugs of the Medical City, and he is also here.
As soon as I saw him, I was mesmerized. At that moment, I was Admiral Joshua, and it was also the first time for me to see the young Joshua of Milan.
He is tall, wearing a military uniform and a military cap, with a thick military cape draped behind him. His hands in black gloves are clasped in front of his abdomen. His standing posture is not the most common straight and upright posture of military women, but a little relaxed, with a slight curve in his shoulders and hips.
I know that he stands like this to cover the tail hook hidden on his body. If he stands too straight, the cloak will not be able to cover the shape of the tail hook.
I have seen Admiral Joshua’s imagination of Doctor Milan many times in his memory fragments, but all his imaginations are inferior to the real Milan before me.]
[Produce pictures, produce pictures!! Fate, you need some military doctor models!!! Don’t take pictures of roommates, take pictures of military doctors directly!!!]
【? ? You're killing me!!! Do you know how long I've been looking forward to having a roommate? ! 】
[As soon as the meeting was over, I rushed straight to Milan, and my brother couldn't even hold me tightly.]
[Hahaha, a husky out of the pen!] [Big Brother Huasha: Sending my brother a bone fracture warning!] [Big Brother Huasha may become the most socially dead parasite in this double group meeting.] [Joshua: What is this? Oh, brain! No more! Milan Milan!]
[I have all the experience of Admiral Joshua. I bypassed the Wasp security with little effort. I slithered like a snake and no one could catch me.
There were some young soldiers standing next to Milan, who were his students. When they saw me coming suddenly, they tried to stop me one by one.
They were very fierce. Two of them tied me up together. I was a little panicked but I managed to get out.
The next moment, I bumped into Milan's hands.
I was so busy dealing with those wasp soldiers that I didn't notice how he did it. When I came to my senses, he had already pinned me to the ground.
He sat on my back, pinching the back of my neck with his left hand, and his military cape covering my lower body. I seemed to have turned into a stool, stiff and motionless.
He looked down at me with a cold expression. My eldest brother came over with his comrades from the First Army. He looked up, but did not stand up. Instead, he sneered at his Wasp comrade beside him.
"I wondered which low-ranking soldier in the regiment was so reckless as to dare to attack directly. It turned out to be the young master of the First Army."
He was so majestic, full of vitality, sharp and powerful that I watched him out of the corner of my eye and forgot to look away when my eldest brother lifted him up.
I stared at Milan in a daze. He had excellent facial expression management and I had no idea what emotions were hidden under his expressionless face. He glanced at me coldly, turned and left without even listening to my brother's apology.
After I got back, I was beaten up by my elder brother.]
【Hahahaha】xN
【Please expand the section about sitting down and carrying on the back in detail! 】
…
[You are a bunch of stupid idiots! I am different! What era is the Wasp Army cape of Mr. Milan from? Fate, you must write this clearly! ]
…
[It hurts, but I still feel that the world is brighter.
I was 16, Milan was still in the military, and we had a bright future.
I was obsessed at the time, my mind was filled with one idea.
I am an admiral, I have experience, I know the future, I can help Milan overcome his difficulties, I can... I can openly put everything in his hands, treat him well, and pursue him.
I finally got rid of Joshko's shadow, and I could merge all my thoughts, ideas, and desires into one heart and give it to Milan.
At that time, I was still too stupid to think that as long as I was legal and expressed my deep love, Milan would look me in the eye.
I was so wrong.]
【？ ？ ？】
[What's wrong? This isn't the correct answer? ? It's legal and it expresses true love! What's wrong with this, Mr. Fate? ! ]
[…
I managed to get Milan's private mic number.
I told him everything, told Milan the dangers he would face in the future, told him that I could help him, I was too excited and wanted to get close to him too much. Although I had the memory of the admiral period at that time, I was still an impulsive teenager.
Milan did not respond to these messages.
It wasn't until the seventh day that I sent a message to Milan and found out that his phone number had been deactivated.
I was totally confused.
I checked again, and the feedback I got back made me regret it deeply.
Milan Clement, who once said in his memory that he had never left Medical City, abnormally applied for an army field mission.
During that mission, the Wasp Army lost more than half of its soldiers, and Milan did not return.
On the tenth day after I told everything, I saw Milan’s name and black-and-white photo in the public hero’s notice issued by the Wasp Corps.
He still had a cold expression in the photo, and neither black nor white could diminish the vibrant strength in him.
I thought of the memories that Milan said he had hidden away, his relatives, friends, and comrades.
I thought of how he persevered for many years for his loved ones and comrades.
I thought that within his broken body he had a strong soul that could polish Choshko into a smooth person.
I figured it all out.
Even if there is a tiny exposure that is out of control, Milan will not let it happen as long as he can still control the situation.
So he applied for a field mission and died in the starry sky. His buried coffin was empty, with only Wasp flags and uniforms inside.
In my second life, I didn’t live past the age of 20.
I broke down again because of his decisive departure. My loved ones couldn't understand me, and no one could understand me.
Who can understand me?
I feel that the future is bright, I feel that I am qualified, and I can't wait to give this long-buried love to Milan.
Then my love killed him.
Later I began to hate Milan again.
You can turn around and step into the cemetery of the starry sea without hesitation for the safety of your relatives, friends and comrades.
Your love is so strong, long-lasting and indestructible.
I have many treasures and memories that are worth more than stars, if you want them, as long as I have them.
Why won't you show me even a little mercy?
…
[The interview was paused for 10 minutes. Mr. Joshua was in low spirits. The strange twitching and absent-mindedness appeared again. Mr. Milan was in a stable mood. They chatted privately for a while. Mr. Joshua managed to cheer up. The interview continued.]]
[Don’t stop! Don’t stop! Don’t stop here!!! Explain the follow-up, explain the follow-up!! If you stop here tonight, I will go crazy immediately!! ]
[It’s about time, about 1 or 2 o’clock. It seems that Fate follows the Capital Alliance time zone. He usually goes off the air at this time.]
【Through Fate's story, I seem to have really grasped some ideas about how to deal with your Excellency? If I don't look at the perspective of Milan, I will definitely think that Joshua has done so much, why is Milan still not satisfied. But looking at Milan's situation again, and then comparing it with Joshua's perspective, it is really important to communicate with your heart and restrain your own way of doing things. The precautions given by the court are secondary. 】
[Excessive attentiveness is a burden to you. Why didn’t you tell me about this earlier…]
[I counted the number of times Joshua and Mr. Milan have met. Joshua, you really make me cry. So far, you have never failed to make mistakes.]
[Joshua, your million rebirths... can't be a million failures, right?]
…
Suddenly, the pixelated man in the live broadcast room continued to move and plant words.
[…
The second time I opened my eyes, I was 14, one year younger than the last time.]
【！ ！ Oh oh oh!!!】
[Will Fate broadcast live all night tonight? ! ! ]
Suddenly, the live broadcast room was lit up with colorful and dazzling gift effects.
…
Rover base.
Anushka fastened his tie and put on his military cap. He heard the crazy sound effects of gifts in the live broadcast room. He frowned and looked, and the pixel man started to move again.
He checked the time on his computer: 2 a.m. Saturday.
Weird? How can Fate have time to stay up all night when he is so busy every day?
Anushka left the live broadcast room, clicked on Fate's account, and sent a message to inquire.
SVIP Standard A567: [Do you want to stay up all night tonight? Is your body able to do so?]
But until Anushka answered the call, Fate did not reply to his message.
Before the general secretary came to give his speech, Anushka took some time to send two messages to Fate.
SVIP Standard A567: [I will depart from the Rover Base tonight and head for the Western Andromeda region. I will arrive at the Western Andromeda region around 23:00 on August 27. The two groups will engage in battle at 1:00 a.m. on the 28th. I will arrive at the refuge area one hour earlier than the two groups start the battle.]
SVIP standard A567: [If you encounter problems during the retreat, call me. I have opened the roamer family permissions for you, and your social application can be connected at any time. ]
After posting, Anushka switched back from social mode to military mode, walked to the large team on the parade ground, and began to listen to the general's speech.