Chapter 55. Use and discard.
He Peiru realized that her gaze was too direct.
With only her and Gu Zhaoqian inside, it was impossible for her to conceal her every move, and all her thoughts became impossible to hide.
Gu Zhaoqian met her gaze through the glass reflection, but found that he couldn't seem to read the emotions in the man's eyes.
The man's expression remained unchanged; the chaos and turmoil seemed to have had no effect on him whatsoever, and he still appeared to be handling everything with ease.
He Peiru realized once again that the gap between her and Gu Zhaoqian was definitely not something that could be explained in a few words.
Now that things have come to this, she has mustered enough courage and just wants to go all out and test the waters.
She was still looking at the glass, which had become a mirror due to the darkness, when she saw Gu Zhaoqian's hand fall on her head.
The moment she felt the warmth from above her head, she tensed up and forgot to breathe.
Was his action sudden?
He Peiru should have expected this much earlier.
No matter how much she wanted to escape, the thought of a man and a woman alone in a room was obvious to both of them.
He Peiru took a deep breath, tilted her head back slightly, and mumbled, "What's wrong?"
Her voice seemed too soft, and even though she was sure she had finished speaking, she couldn't help but wonder if Gu Zhaoqian had heard her clearly.
Before she could decide whether to repeat the question, she heard the man say, "I was thinking about your trip to England."
"Didn't you say it's very convenient to travel to and from the UK?"
He Peiru deliberately asked a question in return, and without realizing that she cared about this matter, she completely revealed it.
Gu Zhaoqian was amused by her reaction, so he didn't hide anything and replied, "That was just to comfort you."
Undeniably, this way of thinking did help, at least it wasn't as unbearable as she had imagined when she first made the decision.
Even though she knew Gu Zhaoqian's intentions, when he said it himself, the clear words made her heart skip a beat.
She hesitated for a moment and asked, "Then you..."
Why did you choose to say it at this time?
Gu Zhaoqian did not give a direct answer, but instead asked, "How did you get through the power outages in the past?"
"If there's a power outage... I'm basically not at home."
The ensuing questions gave He Peiru no time to think, instead stirring up memories buried deep in her heart—
When they lived in Hung Hom, even lighting a candle for light would be thoroughly criticized by Ho Chung for being wasteful.
She would usually choose to escape to a McDonald's in the nearby neighborhood or an open emergency shelter in the community, or go directly to find Yu Yin.
There's always a way to overcome difficulties.
Having survived the most difficult years, and now living a carefree life, he still feels it's too dreamy to be real.
She didn't speak, but she knew that her silence was the answer she was giving Gu Zhaoqian.
Anyway, they've already investigated those past events, so it's not hard to imagine what she went through.
He Peiru felt the hand on her head tighten its grip, but thankfully it wasn't painful.
This also prevented her from seeing the expression on the man's face.
She sighed inwardly, annoyed that she had inadvertently brought up the topic, especially since the people around her had already been kind enough to her.
Just then, Gu Zhaoqian finally spoke up: "If only I had known about your existence sooner."
He Peiru had heard similar sentiments before, but now, hearing them again, her heart was no longer greatly moved. She simply said softly, "Perhaps these things were destined."
He replied softly, "Yes, that's not wrong."
Taking advantage of Gu Zhaoqian's relaxed state, she quietly turned to the side, wanting to catch a glimpse of him even in the dim light.
However, in the instant their eyes met, she completely forgot what she wanted to say.
The distance between them, where they could feel each other's breath, left her mind completely blank, making it impossible for her to think.
All she knew was that she couldn't panic too much.
Gu Zhaoqian, however, seemed not to give her a chance to react. He suddenly lowered his head and leaned closer, as if trying to see through her heart.
He Peiru was startled, and because of her previous actions, she had no chance to back down or avoid the situation.
This has deviated from normal social distancing.
She stared intently at Gu Zhaoqian, the rush of adrenaline making her forget her nervousness.
Now, when facing him, the panic she used to feel only suppresses her emotions.
and……
She has already figured it out and there's no need for it.
Only by being open and honest can I better get along with Gu Zhaoqian.
She couldn't keep relying on his tolerance while doing things that were out of line.
He Peiru could clearly feel time passing by, while Gu Zhaoqian patiently waited for her to speak.
She silently encouraged herself, but after a short while, she said, "I wanted to say..."
“If you’re just going to say thank you again, you don’t have to continue.” Gu Zhaoqian seemed to read her mind, interrupting her after she had only said three words. “But I want to say that if you encounter this situation again, you can ask me for help directly.”
He Peiru finally managed to get started, but she didn't know how to continue. She wanted to bite the bullet and say something.
He saw through her act after she only said two words.
She had no choice but to explain, "I thought you were in Repulse Bay."
Then he pursed his lips, as if he had fallen into a bottleneck again.
Gu Zhaoqian didn't force her to say anything, but told her, "When I saw the weather forecast this morning, I was sure I was planning to go back to Repulse Bay."
"But considering you've been here recently, I came to the Mountain Mansion just to be on the safe side."
“I… didn’t expect it.” Even though He Peiru could guess that Gu Zhaoqian appeared at the Shan Mansion because of her, she still subconsciously denied it.
This made her wonder, "What if there hadn't been a power outage today?"
"No power outage?" He didn't answer directly, but instead asked, "Isn't Sophia not here?"
In other words, no matter what, Gu Zhaoqian will always be by her side.
He Peiru understood this meaning easily, but still muttered, "I think I can handle it myself."
“That’s right.” Gu Zhaoqian not only didn’t deny it, but also continued, “I knew Aru was very determined and would definitely find a way to solve it.”
He used the word "steadfast," not the "strong" that she had heard so often since childhood.
After all, this kind of resilience was something He Peiru was forced to develop in the environment she was in back then.
She never thought that such a trivial thing could be so worthy of praise.
“But…” She was still immersed in this subtle emotion and did not respond when she heard him continue, “Don’t feel like it’s a burden anymore. These are all things I want to do for you willingly.”
His words became more and more direct, but He Peiru never knew how to respond, and could only softly reply, "I know."
A man sighed softly beside her, reminding her, "Don't forget again when you turn around."
Immediately afterwards, Gu Zhaoqian and she returned to a normal distance, and the hand that had been resting on her head finally let go.
Because of the power outage, everything seemed to be shrouded in a thin veil, as if nothing had happened.
Nevertheless, He Peiru comforted herself that she could finally breathe a sigh of relief.
Being too close only makes her forget to think.
It's like...
She became completely obsessed with Gu Zhaoqian.
However, the feeling of calm was fleeting.
What followed was a thunderstorm.
Unlike before, He Peiru saw more directly the scene of lightning accompanied by thunder falling into Victoria Harbour.
This sudden fright required her to calm down again.
However, the next second, a thunderous roar resounded through the sky, its deafening force like the collapse of the heavens and the splitting of the earth.
He Peiru's heart suddenly clenched, and she instinctively clenched her fists.
Just then, she suddenly felt warmth from her wrist. Turning her head, she saw that Gu Zhaoqian had taken her hand and said to her, "Don't be afraid."
She turned her head away slightly, stubbornly saying, "I'm not scared."
"Okay, you're not afraid."
Gu Zhaoqian's helpless tone didn't sound perfunctory; instead, it carried a hint of doting affection.
The thunder continued unabated, accompanied by blinding white light that illuminated the city in a way unique to nature.
He Peiru felt the warmth coming from her wrist, and there was no denying that this action made her feel much more at ease, especially soothing the sudden fright she had felt.
Amidst the gradually fading thunder, Gu Zhaoqian asked, "What were your original plans for today?"
"I wouldn't call it a plan, it's just that I'm slowly preparing for my trip to the UK during this period of time."
After she finished speaking, she realized that the topic had circled back to itself, as if she was destined to face this issue directly.
He Peiru raised her eyes slightly and saw the corners of Gu Zhaoqian's lips curl up.
He was clearly aware of this as well.
She desperately hoped it was just her imagination, but Gu Zhaoqian seemed determined not to let the matter rest, saying, "The Jiang family has a great reputation; even in England, people in the industry will treat you with respect."
"Just focus on studying and having fun."
Hearing these familiar remarks again, He Peiru couldn't help but retort, "I remember you said something similar before."
He neither confirmed nor denied it, but seemed to be keeping it a secret: "But there was still something left unsaid back then."
"What?"
She asked.
Gu Zhaoqian looked at her and asked, "If I flew to England to find you, would you be willing to see me?"
“I…” He Peiru took a deep breath and asked in return, “Why do you think I’m unwilling?”
"That's good."
Having received the response he wanted, he didn't ask any further questions.
But He Peiru had the upper hand because of the undeniable sensation on her wrist. She couldn't bear it any longer and said, "Could you please let go of my hand first?"
"Can't."
The rejection was so swift it was as if it hadn't been thought at all.
She could only try to persuade him by saying, "But if that's the case, I can't do anything else."
"Is there anything you want to do? The power is still out."
He even raised an eyebrow deliberately as he answered.
"I……"
He Peiru could think of no excuse at this point.
It was as if no matter what she said, Gu Zhaoqian would easily see through what she was trying to hide.
Thinking of this, she instantly decided to give up struggling.
However, Gu Zhaoqian had no intention of letting the topic pass by so easily. He asked, as if on purpose, "So you're not scared now that there's no thunder, right?"
He Peiru immediately fell silent.
The scene from just now is still vivid in my mind, and any attempt to refute it would seem rather feeble.
He reached out his other hand, gently pinched her cheek, and said with a smile, "Don't you think this looks like... using me and then throwing me away?"
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