Chapter 48 I love Song-ge…
"A-Tang!" Gu Chang suddenly leaned forward, her eyes filled with undisguised pain and obsession. "I can accept that you don't like me! But why... why Chu Song of all people?"
His voice suddenly rose, trembling uncontrollably and filled with a deep-seated hatred, "No matter who it is, I will do everything in my power to bring you back to my side! But if that person is Chu Song... I will not hesitate to completely destroy him and ruin his reputation!"
The intense hatred terrified Xie Tang.
She stared at Gu Chang, whose handsome face was now twisted with anger and some deep-seated secret, making him unsettling.
"What exactly is the grudge between you and Song-ge?" she asked cautiously, not wanting to touch on his wounds, nor wanting Chu Song to get into trouble because of it.
"It's nothing." Gu Chang's expression returned to normal instantly, as if his loss of control just now was just an illusion.
He avoided talking about outsiders, his gaze refocusing on Xie Tang with a desperate intensity: "Tang, because I love you, I will never be satisfied with just being your friend. Do you understand?"
"But I don't love you." Xie Tang found it utterly absurd.
She repeatedly recalled the seven years they had known each other, but could not find any trace of his affection.
This feeling came suddenly and was suffocating.
"It's okay if you don't love me!" Gu Chang interrupted her urgently, a glimmer of hope in his eyes. "As long as you give me a chance, I will definitely make you fall in love with me!"
Xie Tang shook her head firmly: "Impossible. I told you, I love Song-ge..."
"No! You don't love him!" Gu Chang's emotions surged again, and she categorically denied it. "You only made this deal with him for money! To get back what belonged to the Qin family! I know you have your reasons, I can understand, I can forgive your momentary lapse of judgment..."
"I did nothing wrong! I don't need your understanding, and I certainly don't need your forgiveness!"
Xie Tang was thoroughly enraged by his arrogance, and her voice was firm and resolute, "Gu Chang, I am responsible for my own path and my own life. Please—stop interfering in my affairs!"
"I can't just stand by and watch you jump into the mud!" Gu Chang suppressed his anger. "Do you know why my brother was willing to marry you?"
"I'm not that stupid," Xie Tang said calmly.
Although she didn't know the reason, and Chu Song never explicitly stated it, she was far from naively believing that he acted out of kindness or love.
Seeing her so calm, Gu Chang's anger intensified, and he finally roared, "He's using you!"
“That means I have value, and I’m willing to do it.” Xie Tang raised her head slightly, her voice soft but undeniable. “Nothing in this world is purely unconditional. Even if he uses me, as long as he can give me what I need, it’s worth it.”
Gu Chang felt powerless, realizing that he could not shake her resolve.
Xie Tang felt he had made his point and got up to leave.
“A-Tang…” Gu Chang chased after her and grabbed her arm.
Xie Tang abruptly shook him off and turned to look at him warily.
"I'll wait for you! Your marriage is just a contractual agreement; it won't last three years at most, and at the earliest..."
"Why do you like me?" Xie Tang interrupted his frantic words angrily, not understanding why she could make him so persistent.
Gu Chang took a deep breath. "I've thought about this question countless times, and I really want to know the answer."
Xie Tang couldn't bear to look at his red eyes and injured expression; she felt guilty but only sympathy.
"When did it start?"
"The year I went abroad... In that foreign land, I thought of you every moment and wished I could fly back to your side immediately. You used to be so good to me—gentle, meticulous and considerate."
Gu Chang gave a wan smile. "Knowing I don't like onions, I always avoid them when ordering or cooking. Remember? One summer I had a fever, and you came to take care of me in the rain. I said I was feeling down, and you played games with me all afternoon; I said I couldn't sleep, and you stayed up all night watching movies and chatting with me..."
"Ah Tang, if this doesn't count as liking someone, then what does? Isn't liking someone about doing your best to be good to them? You care about me so much, so why is it that in the end, I'm the only one who's fallen for you?"
"You're so good to me, how can I let go..."
His reddened eyes were fixed on Xie Tang. "It's all my fault. If I had realized this sooner, I definitely wouldn't have left..."
"This isn't love, it's habit and dependence. You know I'm just as good to Yin Xi and Tang Zhi. In my heart, you're just like them, a friend. Don't be sentimental, let go, it's better for both of you."
"Ah Tang, I can't let go..." Gu Chang's voice turned gloomy.
Xie Tang resolutely turned and left, never looking back.
Gu Chang stared at her retreating figure and said resentfully, "I gave you a chance to come back, but you didn't take it. If I do anything awful in the future, don't be angry."
——————
Xie Tang returned home exhausted, and the sound of a baby laughing came from inside.
The two nannies and Aunt Yu were playing with the child when she remembered that Chu Song's adopted child had been delivered.
Seeing that she looked tired, Aunt Yu invited her to go see the children.
Xie Tang approached; the baby was chubby and fair-skinned with round eyes, but its features were still unrecognizable.
"A hug?" Aunt Yu asked.
Xie Tang quickly waved his hand, looking at the soft little body, afraid that he wouldn't be able to hold it properly, and just watched from the side.
"Shin-chan, look, it's Mom!"
Aunt Yu's words made Xie Tang's heart skip a beat.
She had no awareness of being a mother before, and now that she saw Xiaoxin smiling at her with narrowed eyes, she felt even more unfamiliar and uneasy, and just wanted to avoid him.
“Xiao Xin is so pitiful,” the nanny sighed. “When he was brought here, he was skin and bones, weighing less than six pounds. He stayed in an incubator for more than half a month. To have a mother like that, sigh… Fortunately, the old man is kind-hearted and found him a new home.”
Xie Tang looked at the child and felt a pang of pity. She didn't know whether the child was more pitiful or Chu Song was more pitiful.
She belatedly noticed the name: "Xiaoxin is a nickname?"
Aunt Yu gently teased Chu Xin: "Chu Xin is your full name."
"Huh? You changed your name?"
"Ah-Song thought the character '赟' had a good meaning, implying both literary and martial talents as well as wealth, but it was too greedy and heavy, and he was afraid the child wouldn't be able to handle it. Also, '赟' sounds like '韫', which Ah-Song didn't like, so he changed it to '新', hoping he would have a new life from now on. Little Xin, do you like the name Daddy gave you?"
Chu Xin chuckled, revealing his bare gums.
Xie Tang went back to her room to wash up, feeling utterly exhausted, and fell into a deep sleep as soon as she lay down.
In the middle of the night, a piercing cry suddenly rang out.
Xie Tang was startled awake, and in her drowsy state, she remembered the new little life that had been added to her family.
She walked out of the room and saw Chu Song sitting on the sofa in his pajamas, clearly also woken up.
Two postpartum nannies were comforting Chu Xin, who was crying loudly.
Aunt Yu hurriedly said, "They were probably startled by the change of location. Leave it to us, you should go and rest."
Chu Song waved his hand, signaling them to continue coaxing.
Chu Xin's crying grew louder and louder, showing no sign of stopping.
Seeing that the nanny couldn't soothe her, Xie Tang simply nestled into the sofa, resting her chin on the cushion and watching with drooping eyelids.
Seeing that she was sleepy and unwilling to go back to her room, Chu Song asked, "Did I wake you up?"
"Hmm." Xie Tang yawned, her eyes glistening with tears. "The baby's lung capacity is amazing."
The crying continued, and she actually drifted off to sleep amidst this "demonic sound".
In her daze, she glimpsed Chu Song getting up and telling her to go back to her room.
She gave a vague reply, but didn't move her body.
After an unknown amount of time, the crying suddenly stopped, and all was silent.
A familiar, cool scent of sandalwood wafted over—Chu Song had returned.
"Asleep?" Chu Song called softly a few times but received no response, so he carefully picked her up.
The scent of ebony and agarwood, though cool, carried a warmth. Xie Tang instinctively moved closer to the heat source, where the fragrance intensified, bringing a strange sense of peace.
However, the next second, she suddenly woke up.
What catches the eye is Chu Song's smooth and resolute jawline.
Afraid of being discovered, she quickly closed her eyes and pretended to be asleep.
Chu Song placed her on the bed and covered her with the blanket. Xie Tang was now mostly awake and had many questions she wanted to ask him. She turned over to look at him.
Chu Song looked down at her. "Awake?"
"I was woken up when you put the bed down..." She told a little lie and got straight to the point, "Brother Song, that one million donation, you donated it in my name, right?"
Chu Song nodded calmly.
"Why?"
He explained, "That money was a wedding gift from Dou Xiao, it's too hot to handle. I suppose you... don't really need that much?"
"Huh?" Xie Tang almost burst out laughing.
What does it mean to say "she doesn't lack this money"?
She's really lacking!
Even fighting in court all year round might not earn the "little bit of money" that Chu Song mentioned, yet he donated it casually.
The gap between people is no greater than this.
"Didn't you take ten million from Qin Ruhai? You've spent it all?"
"How could I? I'm not wasteful. That money is intended for Mom and Grandpa and Grandma's retirement." Xie Tang said with a smile, "I have hands and feet, I can earn my own retirement money."
Chu Song was somewhat surprised: "You made such a great sacrifice, just for your family?"
“They have given me so much love and warmth,” she said with a gentle yet firm smile. “Now that they are old, I want them to enjoy their later years in peace. With that money in hand, I can face whatever comes my way with more composure, and I can do what I want to do with peace of mind.”
Chu Song was slightly moved: "Aren't you afraid of marrying the wrong person? What if you meet a terrible 'Chu Song'?"
Before meeting you, I had prepared for the worst, and my mind was filled with a thousand and one anxious possibilities.
Xie Tang gazed at him intently, her eyes brimming with love. "But the moment I actually saw you, all my worries vanished. I'm so lucky to have met the gentlest person like you. No matter what the future holds, as long as it's you, I'll have the courage to face it."
That mouth of hers is still as sweet as it was when she was a child.
Chu Song's ears burned from her teasing. He looked down and realized that she was still holding his hand, but he didn't feel any repulsion at all.
Seeing this, Xie Tang quickly withdrew his hand and smiled sheepishly.
"Go to sleep."
"Okay, goodnight, Song-ge."
——————
The next day, Xie Tang woke up to find Chu Song had already left.
The nanny walked around the living room with a baby bottle in one hand and the baby in the other.
Aunt Yu brought breakfast to the table and noticed that she looked much more energetic. "You must have had a good night's sleep last night."
Xie Tang took a sip of milk. "No good."
"What did you dream about?" Xie Tang sighed. "You lost a million."
Aunt Yu laughed and said, "Luckily, it was just a dream."
Xie Tang was both amused and exasperated. She wished it were just a dream. But then she thought that the 1 million yuan wasn't hers to begin with, so there was nothing to regret about donating it.
"Oh, right, here you go." Aunt Yu handed over an exquisite invitation. "It was delivered by the Dou family's butler yesterday. Ah Song came back very late last night, and I didn't have time to give it to him. The Dou family's butler specifically instructed that a car would be sent to pick you up on the day of the banquet."
Xie Tang accepted the invitation; it was a birthday invitation. Dou Xiao would be hosting a dinner party at the Peninsula City Villa on Friday evening, and Xie Tang and Chu Song were among those invited.
"I'll talk to Brother Song." Xie Tang said, drinking her milk. The nanny had already finished feeding Chu Xin.
Chu Xin looked at her with a burp, her eyes big and bright, she looked quite cute.
She smiled gently at Chu Xin, then turned to Aunt Yu and asked, "How long did he cry before he finally fell asleep in the middle of the night?"
"It hasn't been long," Aunt Yu said with a smile. "I didn't expect this little guy to like Asong so much."
"What's your relationship with Brother Song?"
"Ah Song asked the nanny to teach him how to hold the baby, and he only held him for a short while before the little guy calmed down. You were asleep and didn't see it. Oh, by the way, I secretly took a video, I'll show it to you."
Xie Tang leaned closer and saw a sleeping baby boy resting on Chu Song's shoulder, his large hand gently resting on the back, which was only the size of a palm.
"Look, how adorable this little guy looks, sleeping on Asong's shoulder."
Xie Tang smiled, surprised that Chu Song had the potential to be a loving father.
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