Old Friend and Herself (2)
It turns out that you can really wait.
Having been ridiculed and despised, she decided to hide her true self, presenting it only through a protective facade. However, if she continued like this, others would only see her mask. She wondered how many more suits of armor she would need to don as she grew older to navigate the world unscathed. Yet, as a teenager, what she longed for most was to earn true recognition and appreciation for her authentic self.
Zhao Shihua's eyes were filled with tears and he hurriedly lowered his head to hide his gratitude. At the same time, he also felt a sense of relief and freedom as if he could finally breathe a sigh of relief.
Pei Nachuan and Jian Tingting had already turned backstage; their crosstalk show was probably almost over. Their backs, one in black and one in white, turned a corner and disappeared behind the barrier.
People walked by behind her, and Zhao Shihua turned her back to the wall. Shao Yifu turned around and noticed that she was behaving strangely. He took a few steps closer, bent down, and looked over: "Wow, you are not crying, are you?"
"No." Zhao Shihua never liked to expose his weakness. He turned away a little and blinked hard in an attempt to force back the tears.
"Why are you unhappy again? You were fine just now?" Shao Yifu also turned around, scratched his head as if a little overwhelmed, and then suddenly raised his index finger, "Oh! I understand! Are you..."
Zhao Shihua tilted her head slightly and glanced at him out of the corner of her eye. He glanced around as if about to reveal a secret and asked in a low voice, "...Are you jealous of Jian Tingting?"
"What?" She couldn't imagine how Shao Yifu came to this conclusion.
"Ah, Dapeng just asked me if they were together. How would I know?" Shao Yifu sighed. "Actually, Nana looks a bit more human in a suit, and the two of them look quite similar when standing together."
Seeing her face full of disbelief, Shao Yifu thought he had guessed the reason. In the end, he talked more and more outrageous things. He even patted her shoulder to comfort her and said with emotion, "It's okay, we are all the same."
Zhao Shihua really wanted to ask him if he had stopped reading "One Piece" recently and started reading girls' comics like "Boys Over Flowers". She couldn't help feeling angry and amused, and quickly shook him off and rushed to the bathroom to change her clothes.
"Don't worry, I won't tell anyone." He added loyally at the end.
He's crazy. Who wants to form a heartbroken group with him?
Unexpectedly, the day after the party, their heartbreak group had swelled into a half-grade-wide alliance of heartbreak supporters. Besides the topic of Li Meiyu, the Chinese-foreign friendship ambassador, the magic show the night before, and plans for the New Year's holiday, the only topic on the list was Pei Nachuan and Jian Tingting, forcibly juxtaposed. The group, overly excited about the holiday, even had enough free time to take over the matchmaker's job, creating a red string across two floors and a dozen classes.
But compared to Zhao Shihua's earlier, seemingly insurmountable scandal, these rumors were more like a pre-holiday topic. After the holiday, everyone would likely be preoccupied with final exam preparation, and wouldn't have time for part-time Cupid.
Zhao Shihua originally planned to go to the university town to find Zhao Shuhua like she did during the Mid-Autumn Festival. When she called her, she also recalled the scene of watching the fireworks on the mountain and asked her if there were any New Year's Eve activities in the university town. However, she heard her sister say that she had to prepare a project with her tutor and would go to another city during the New Year's Day.
The thought of having to spend New Year's Eve alone in the dormitory immediately dampened her joy. Xu Jiamei and Qiao Xiaoling had both decided to go home. Zhuo Siqi might return to school early, but he would definitely stay home for the first day of the holiday.
During lunch break, Zhao Shihua rested her chin on her hand, watching everyone pack their bags like an outsider, her eyes filled with envy and despair. Seeing her pitiful appearance, Xu Jiamei invited her out shopping on New Year's Day. Zhao Shihua's excitement lasted only half a minute before she remembered that she didn't live nearby, and rushing over just to meet her would take half a day. She might as well just go back to school.
"It's okay, just rest at home!"
"Okay, then I'll bring you some delicious food later!" Xu Jiamei hugged Zhao Shihua who was sitting on a small stool from behind.
"I'll take it too, I'll take it too!" Qiao Xiaoling raised her hand and agreed.
The three of them then glanced at Zhuo Siqi simultaneously. She zipped up her travel bag with a swish, then noticed their gazes and was about to say something. Zhao Shihua was worried about putting her under moral pressure, after all, even having different sleep and rest schedules had been overly interpreted as being unsociable or aloof. So she jumped in to defend her, saying, "It's okay, you don't need to bring anything. What they gave you is enough." But the words only made her more embarrassed, considering she was the first one to give him mooncakes during Mid-Autumn Festival.
"I might be back tomorrow night, so let's go study together then." Zhuo Siqi stood up to lock his locker, and hesitated for a moment as he put away the key. "If you don't mind, why don't you come to my house for dinner tonight? It's only half an hour away, not too far. If you want, you can stay overnight."
At that moment, half the dormitory building probably heard Zhao Shihua's shout of "I don't mind!" followed by the even louder "I do!!!" Many people probably thought someone had taken advantage of their New Year's resolution to confess their love downstairs, and several even ran into the hallway to see what was going on. Of course, downstairs, there were only the last few students rushing back to the dorm before the lunch bell and the dorm supervisor, ready to arrest someone and deduct points. There was no sign of any idol drama actor clutching a guitar.
After the dorm manager finished checking the rooms, Zhao Shihua immediately and stealthily climbed out of bed and tiptoed to pack her laundry, so excited she couldn't sleep all afternoon. It seemed even the teachers in the afternoon biology and geography classes couldn't wait for the break; they started chatting after only half a period.
After finally making it to the end of the school day, everyone waved goodbye and said, "See you next year!" The classroom was gone in the blink of an eye. Before leaving, Zhao Shihua glanced at the New Year's resolutions written by the students on the blackboard. Most of them were academic-related; after all, the back wall was right under the teacher's nose, so they didn't dare to be too presumptuous. Of course, there were a few mischievous ones, like "I hope XXX will talk more quietly during study" and "Don't make mistakes in chemical formulas again." There were even some extremely long formulas listed below—could they be planning to cheat on the exam later? There was also something like "Get tickets to the Green Boys tour!" Who knew which fangirl wrote it?
My own wish was hidden in an inconspicuous corner—"Go back to the past/Start all over again," from two completely unrelated songs. Not wanting to be discovered, I rushed to class early, only to find several more wishes on the blackboard than the night before. It seemed like many people were struggling with the desire to keep their wishes secret while also wanting to share them publicly.
And above her vague New Year's resolution, there were eight characters written in antithetical couplets, which should be Zhuo Siqi's handwriting: "One step at a time, down to earth", like a slogan for setting off to somewhere.
Zhao Shihua reflected, gazing at the street scene. She had no idea where Zhuo Siqi's destination was, nor did she know where her deskmate's home was in reality. The bus before the holiday was so packed that they couldn't move. If they weren't careful, they'd be separated by several people, unable to even speak. She could only stare out the window.
The bus crawled along the clogged main road, moving every few meters and stopping for minutes. Zhao Shihua scanned nearly every store sign along the way before finally turning a corner and entering what looked like a residential area. Although the street had narrowed, the traffic had also decreased dramatically, becoming smoother, and the passengers seemed to breathe a sigh of relief.
I don't know how much time passed, but when I came to my senses, the lights on the roadside had gradually turned on. Zhao Shihua finally heard a familiar voice from a few meters away: "We're here, let's get off!"
Zhuo Siqi lives in the old city. Compared to the skyscrapers in the commercial district, the surrounding buildings seem low and cramped, connected by tangled wires, with lush banyan trees filling the remaining gaps. Bicycles are parked everywhere on the street, and there are many makeshift stalls selling radish, beef brisket, fried foods, barbecued food, steamed buns, and rice dumplings. Not far away is what seems to be a vegetable market, where people rush home from work carrying their groceries.
As soon as Zhao Shihua got off the bus, her ears were filled with all kinds of sounds: the sound of cooking, the sound of TV, crying, dogs barking, and bus bells; just a few steps out of the station, she smelled the smell of cooking fumes wafting from every household... She vaguely thought she had returned to the neighborhood where her home was. Everything was so old, yet familiar and kind.
But after all, he wasn't going home, but visiting someone else's house. Zhao Shihua then remembered that he had nothing with him. "It's not good to go to your house suddenly without bringing anything, right?"
"No need," Zhuo Siqi pulled Zhao Shihua away from the fruit stand, "It's just the two of us."
"Your parents are not at home? Isn't it a holiday for New Year's Day?" Zhao Shihua immediately imagined Zhuo Siqi alone at home, feeling helpless and helpless. He was exactly like the protagonist in the TV series who suffered a lot and finally emerged as a butterfly.
"Well, my mom is on night shift at the hospital today. She's a nurse."
No wonder she didn't even call home to let them know after her deskmate invited her during lunch break. It turns out she made all the decisions herself. But then there was no further news, and Zhuo Siqi didn't explain her father's situation. Zhao Shihua searched her memory but couldn't find any clues about her family. She was too embarrassed to ask further, fearing she might be hiding something.
The two chatted about other topics here and there, and finally turned into an old house with only six floors. The voice-activated light on the top floor was broken, so Zhuo Siqi took out his key and fumbled for a while before inserting it. He opened the door with a creak, and a cold, damp wind blew towards him, the stale smell of a long-standing residence.
Zhuo Siqi's home was so simple that it was easy to tell at a glance. Even her room was so plain that it was almost impossible to tell the gender of the owner. Unlike most girls' rooms, there were no fancy decorations at all. Only a few awards on the wall gave people a glimpse of Zhuo Siqi's personality. Zhao Shihua took a closer look and found that the awards were all for essay writing competitions. No wonder her deskmate's essays always scored so high.
"It's all just a routine." Zhuo Siqi explained after hearing Zhao Shihua's repeated envy.
"But the martial arts competitions also feature routines." She was a little unwilling to accept this, because she had never won any major awards, whether it was for her composition routines or her martial arts routines.
Zhao Shihua was puzzled. Zhuo Siqi's grades in math, physics and chemistry were obviously not bad, but he seemed to have never seen any certificates for such competitions. It couldn't be that he had never won any award.
"I have participated, but I just picked the ones I liked and posted them."
It's true, "The rich feast, the poor freeze to death"—Zhao Shihua, remembering how she couldn't match her sister's number of awards in elementary school, longed to have her perfect attendance award tacked up on the wall. Zhuo Siqi's casual boasting was truly enviable.
"No, I was just joking." Seeing Zhuo Siqi's hearty laughter, Zhao Shihua knew she had done it on purpose. "Actually, it's because two of my classmates always performed better than me in the Mathematical Olympiad, so it wasn't my turn to participate."
"That's much better than me!" Zhao Shihua remembered that he would occasionally ask to borrow "Mengya" magazine. "Since you like writing, you can also enter other competitions. Isn't there the New Concept Essay Competition?"
"I know," but for some reason Zhuo Siqi's smile faded a little. "But high school should focus on academics."
"Writing is also a serious academic subject! If you win a prize, you can even be directly admitted to a university!" Zhao Shihua once dreamed of getting extra points for martial arts to get into a good university. However, with her kung fu skills, she probably couldn't even get into an ordinary sports school.
"But my mother thinks...she doesn't think this is the right path." Zhuo Siqi pulled out the chair in front of the desk. "Put your things here first. I'll go to the kitchen to see what to eat for dinner."
"Do you cook for yourself? I mean when Auntie is not at home."
"It's no problem to stir-fry something simple." Zhuo Siqi opened the refrigerator door. The style of the home appliances was still the same as those commonly seen in childhood, but the mint green had faded into a very light green, and was even a little yellow.
"You are so amazing, you can even cook. My mother never lets me learn because she thinks I am too slow." Zhao Shihua followed closely behind and wanted to flatter him a few more times, after all, she would be able to taste her classmate's cooking later. However, she glanced at the box and saw that it was almost empty. As the saying goes, even a good cook cannot cook without rice, so she quickly swallowed the question of what to eat.
"Why don't we go downstairs to eat..." Zhuo Siqi closed the refrigerator door, "Sorry, I should have told my mom in advance and asked her to buy some food."
As Zhao Shihua stepped out of the house, he clearly heard the other person sigh, which made him, the guest, feel guilty. "It's okay, going to a fast food restaurant is also good! It's much better than eating alone in the cafeteria. Did you know? My family owns a fast food restaurant, so eating fast food is just like eating at home."
"...I just realized it," Zhuo Siqi seemed to understand the meaning of her words and finally smiled knowingly, "No wonder you always order so many dishes when you eat out. It turns out it's because your family runs a restaurant."
Zhao Shihua smiled sheepishly, worried about putting pressure on the other party to treat her, and quickly added, "But I don't have high requirements. Anything is fine for dinner!"
"Is roast meat also OK?"
"No problem at all!" Zhao Shihua was so excited that he almost raised his hands in the street.
"What does your fast food restaurant mainly serve?"
"Oh, it's just ordinary Hakka food. The problem is, my house isn't a five-star hotel, just a street food stall, but my mom always asks me to treat my classmates to dinner. Later, I was afraid to bring my classmates past our house."
She lied modestly. Although her food stall was ubiquitous, the food was definitely more than just average. Perhaps that was just her boasting. But the streets and alleys were where the best hidden talents lay. Zhao Shihua scooped a spoonful of broth from the steaming hot roast goose leg noodles, blew on it, and took a sip. She knew their shop was one of them.
"Wow—" She dragged out the last syllable until she ran out of breath, and the chill that had lingered on her feet since the deep winter was swept away. "What a nice smell!"
"Not bad, right? When I was little, every time I finished my exams, my parents would bring me here for a good meal. This restaurant has been around for over ten years."
"Old brands really do guarantee good taste," Zhao Shihua gave a thumbs-up, slurping up a mouthful of egg noodles, which were exceptionally chewy. "So, my family can be considered a half-old brand, too. That shop is only a few years younger than mine."
"I'll go to your house and try it when I have the chance." Zhuo Siqi said as she took a few pieces of sausage and bacon from the cured meat clay pot rice she ordered and gave it to him in exchange for the two large pieces of goose legs that Zhao Shihua had just given her.
"Of course! You can stay at my house for a few days during winter break. My mom will love you, and so will my sister—in short, they all like people who study well." Zhao Shihua picked up another piece of roast goose leg. The fat coated with honey looked crystal clear. In his excitement, he bit down too hard, and the meat juices splashed onto the hand holding the chopsticks. "And my dad and grandma, they will definitely welcome you too."
"Your home is so lively. Mine is just me and my mom," Zhuo Siqi said, his face completely devoid of gloom, as if he were saying something mundane like "It's going to rain tomorrow." Without waiting for Zhao Shihua's response, he continued, "My dad is gone."
"ah?!"
Zhao Shihua suddenly remembered seeing a golden trophy atop the TV cabinet in the living room, inscribed with the words "Outstanding Reporter of the Year, Guangdong Radio and Television Station." She glanced at it at the time and didn't ask any further questions, assuming it was another of Zhuo Siqi's many honors, since she had previously mentioned that she had worked at the radio station in elementary school. Now, thinking back, she realized it was more likely an award from her uncle.
There's also a calligraphy piece hanging on the wall, seemingly out of place among the surrounding furniture. The four characters "天道貿勤" (Heaven's Way Rewards Diligence) are particularly powerful, and the title includes the character "Zhuo," likely a legacy from her father. And her daughter, Zhuo Siqi, clearly upholds the family motto with unwavering care.
Zhao Shihua only knew to say "I'm sorry" when hearing something like this in an English context, but when she returned to her native Chinese, she didn't know how to express it. Instead, Zhuo Siqi comforted her: "It's okay, it's been almost a year, and my mom and I are doing well. Let's talk about your family. I remember your sister is seven years older than you, right?"
But she simply couldn't bear to say more, so she just lowered her head, swallowed the food in her mouth, and said sullenly: "Thank you for inviting me here today."
"I'm really happy that you're with me today... I originally thought it would be fine to be alone, but now I realize it's more fun to celebrate the holidays with good friends." The more polite he was, the more distant they became. Zhuo Siqi simply put down his chopsticks and said, "Forget it, let's not talk about this for now. How are we going to celebrate New Year's Eve tonight?"
Zhao Shihua was really worried that the other party would say something like "Why don't we do a set of papers together" the next second. She just wanted to spend the New Year's Eve with her deskmate and didn't even put her pen in her schoolbag.
"I heard there are fireworks at Haixinsha. I haven't seen one in years. Do you want to go with me?"
"Of course! Where is Haixinsand?" Zhao Shihua raised his chopsticks and agreed in an unusually high tone, hoping to wipe off some of the dark gray color that fell on Zhuo Siqi's body.
After all, there will be many days and many long nights in the future, in which we can slowly tell each other our thoughts.
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