Chapter 53 Extra 02: The Wedding
Even ten years later, Dick was reluctant to recall what happened on the day he and Alan got married.
So much so that he later asked to hold another wedding, but Allen refused each time because he thought it was too much trouble.
“But I feel I didn’t behave well that day, and I’ve also lost most of my memory!” Chief of Police Grayson of Brudhaven Police Department argued.
Mr. Alan Osborn, the director of Brudhaven Hospital and also the director of a mysterious regional hospital, straightened his tie, glanced at the pitiful Dick, and coldly rejected the unreasonable request, "We recorded the whole thing. You can watch the playback if you miss it."
“But I didn’t even say the vows I prepared!” Dick said. “That’s not fair!”
“‘Nothing is absolutely fair except death,’ baby. Do you remember when you smeared my face with saliva during the ‘I do’ part?” The experienced doctor skillfully grabbed Dick’s tie, leaned in and kissed him with a smug grin. “If you want to have another wedding, that’s not out of the question…”
The experienced and mature dean is now adept at using all the techniques to soothe his tantrum-throwing lover, a far cry from the young doctor who was repeatedly teased by Dick.
He has an exceptional learning ability.
Dick's eyes lit up, then a look of doubt crossed his face: "Tell me, baby, what are your conditions?"
Dick sighed in frustration—his once innocent little rabbit, whom he had cherished, had definitely been corrupted by Harry, Matthew, Emily, and Jason over the years. Alan had even learned to flirt with him! Damn it!
The worst one was Jason; he knew Jason would definitely feed Allen a whole bunch of nonsense.
Jason, that bastard, even gave Allen photos of himself in his early shorts outfit and Nightwing's stylish disco king look! Now both photos are enlarged and hanging in their living room, and Allen can even shamelessly declare himself a Nightwing fan.
If he had known that Allen and Big Red would become such good friends, he would never have introduced them!
Because Allen admitted he was a fan of Nightwing, the people at the Broodhaven Police Department now look at him with pity. The astute Chief Grayson even knows his men have a bet on when Nightwing will cheat on him. Even if he swears Allen would never cheat on him with Nightwing, nobody believes him.
Damn it!!
Dick looked at Allen with a wronged expression, trying to use Nightwing's dog-like eyes to make Allen give in.
No one can resist Nightwing's puppy-dog eyes!
"The condition is that your look is the same as at the last wedding," Allen said casually.
"What's the difference between this and the last wedding?!" Dick quickly averted his puppy-dog eyes and rolled his eyes. "You've gone bad, baby. You didn't like this kind of play before."
“There is a difference,” Allen said slowly, adjusting his glasses. “This time you can stay alert the whole time.”
Dick: ...
He unconsciously recalled the scene of his last wedding.
Whether they were cursed or not, after he and Allen successfully proposed to each other on the same day, one bizarre thing after another happened on Earth.
First, an evil force from a parallel universe invaded, and they almost fell victim to an evil version of Alfred from another universe; then, Lex Luthor escaped from prison again and almost succeeded in killing Superman, forcing them to fight several Superman clones, and finally managing to send Luthor back to prison with great difficulty; when he and Alan finally had time to try on their wedding dresses with great enthusiasm, the Lego Company suddenly called the Justice League, saying that a new batch of copyrighted Lego minifigures they had produced had grown legs and run away. While Dick was looking at the surveillance footage, completely bewildered, Alan encountered the group of Lego minifigures on the street raising their C-signs at Batman's five fingers and shouting 'How scary!'
His beloved evil doctor personally captured Lego Nightwing and tried to secretly keep it in a cardboard box.
The vet even fitted the Lego Nightwing with a hamster wheel!
Dick firmly refused and, with Alan looking on with regret, sent the Lego minifigures back to their original world.
He pretended not to see that Allen had quickly ordered hundreds of Nightwing figurines and Lego minifigures, and was trying to contact Constantine to capture some obedient and sensible souls to stuff into the minifigures' bodies.
Fortunately, Constantine refused Allen's unreasonable request on the grounds that he would never breed house-elves.
Later, when he and Allen finally had time to announce their wedding date to their family and friends, Daredevil rushed over to Bruder Haven and beat him up. Batman, on the other hand, took him back to the Batcave with a serious expression and said he needed to have a serious talk.
Then, after some misunderstanding, and after a series of sweet moments that Nightwing would fondly recall, Alan, like Prince Chaming, bravely ventured into the Batcave and rescued Princess Dick, who had been 'kidnapped' by Batman (actually, he went back himself). They finally had their wedding.
The wedding was held in the outskirts of Brude Haven, on the land that belonged to him and Allen—a place now referred to by Batman as the 'X-Realm'.
The wedding that day was ridiculed by Red Hood as Princess Fiona finally marrying Shrek, and from then on they lived happily ever after inside the tentacle monster's belly.
Princess Dick Fiona Grayson looked behind her at the lighthouse formed by tentacles and the dreamlike scene: ...
Later, the alien monster prince Allen very seriously corrected Red Hood: "I think a more appropriate description would be Maleficent and Daji—change the genders."
Maleficent, the evil witch in *Sleeping Beauty* who cursed the kind and lovely Princess Aurora, perfectly fits Alan's image as someone skilled in using spores and controlling others with the superpowers left behind by 'Trisker'. And the reason Alan calls Dick Daji is because…
On his wedding day, Dick was transformed into a large red fox by a green starfish that fell from the sky.
Allen couldn't resist hugging and kissing him several times.
He didn't mind at all the feathers flying everywhere.
Even after turning into a fox, he didn't know why he suddenly developed an overwhelming affection for Allen. He was completely out of his mind at the time, but he insisted on holding Allen in his arms and hiding him in his den. He would bite anyone who tried to get close to Allen.
The dedicated wedding videographers, Clark Kent (Superman) and Peter Parker (Spider-Man), didn't miss a single exciting moment, successfully capturing Bat-Wolf, Red Hood the dog, and Robin the cat.
And the Nightwing Fox, drooling over Allen.
Fortunately, this situation had occurred before when Allen mutated, so everyone remained calm in the face of this crisis and dealt with the very threatening starfish in the sky in less than ten minutes. The starfish is now imprisoned in Allen's mysterious area, and 'Trishkel's' abilities are clearly superior.
Then, Allen married Nightwing the fox.
Their wedding was very grand, with the main characters being a doctor in a sharp suit and a fox in a tattered suit.
By the time Dick regained consciousness, the wedding was over and all the guests had left.
He thought he and Allen might have co-starred in a movie called Zootopia.
But not only did he have no memory of it, he was also ridiculed by everyone for more than half a year.
Because he was howling and baring his teeth in front of Daredevil, who was officiating at the wedding, and then he turned around and started whining to Allen.
So why do foxes cry out in a whimpering voice?! Can't they be a little more forceful?!
Dick remembered that Allen's phone ringtone was still his "whimpering".
Broodhaven's most shapely buttocks, ranked third on the list of sexiest superheroes, and the optimistic and lively Bluebird, feel that although he held a wedding, he is not happy at all.
After another failed negotiation, Dick snapped out of his reverie, tried to salvage his broken heart, and drove off dejectedly in the old Jetta they had once pledged their love in.
Emily sat by the window and shook her head: "Alan, my darling, your perverse sense of humor is getting worse and worse."
But then she immediately became excited and flew around the house, shouting, "Quick, quick, let's get ready!"
Shortly after, another car drove out of Allen's garage.
Around the same time, a group of people also emerged from Wayne Manor.
**
Chief Grayson finally finished another long day. He rubbed his sore neck and went home to change into his Nightwing uniform.
Actually, today is their wedding anniversary.
Although they are an old married couple, and both of them were forced to work overtime today because of a bunch of trivial matters.
But he had already prepared a gift for Allen in advance, just waiting for Allen to get off work and come home so that they would have time to have a candlelight dinner and watch a short movie before the night shift started.
The house was pitch black; it was clear that Allen was still in the hospital.
After all, the life of the director of Brodhaven Hospital is just as exciting as that of the Brodhaven police chief, as they have to deal with all sorts of strange Brodhaven people every day.
He sighed, feeling that his marriage to Allen was like that of the Cowherd and the Weaver Girl, only able to meet in their bedroom after 3 a.m. every day.
Every time they met, either he was so sleepy that he had his eyes closed, or Allen was fast asleep.
'Cowherd' Grayson let himself lie on the soft bed, silently longing for 'Weaver Girl' whom he hadn't seen for more than ten hours.
A noise came from near the window, and Dick, with his face still buried in the blanket, quietly pricked up his ears.
In the quiet night, even the sound of clothes rubbing together seemed amplified infinitely.
Dick thought to himself that this enemy seemed to be quite capable, able to thwart every trap he and Allen had set in the house; it was simply unbelievable.
Who could it be?
Countless thoughts were already running through Dick's mind.
A whoosh of wind swept behind him. Dick's eyes sharpened, and he quickly rolled over on the bed to dodge the hand aimed at the back of his neck.
"As expected of the youngest director in Brudhaven's history, you're quite efficient. It seems office life hasn't given you a beer belly." The voice was unfamiliar.
Perhaps the person on the other end wasn't using their original voice?
Dick had already rolled over and was standing on the floor, holding the bedside lamp in his hand, watching warily the person who had just tried to ambush him.
However, just as he was about to ask who the other person was, he suddenly smelled a strange odor.
The experienced superhero sensed something was wrong and immediately held his breath, but he still inhaled a little.
He suddenly felt a little dizzy.
There was more than one person approaching. Dick skillfully dodged the person who jumped down from the ceiling and tried to ambush him again, but he was still chopped on the back of the neck by someone because of his increasingly heavy steps.
In the last second before he lost consciousness, he was both relieved that Allen wasn't home and inwardly cursing himself for being careless.
After seeing Dick finally pass out, one of the masked men—the grown-up Damian Wayne—couldn't help but roll his eyes. "So why did you have to knock him out and carry him through the motions? Wouldn't it have been better to just tell him that Alan was waiting for him in Gotham?"
The second masked man—Jason Todd—stroked his chin. “But I don’t think that’s dramatic enough. Allen only said we should bring Dick’s head over, but he didn’t say how… My script is that bandits kidnap Princess Dick, and then Prince Allen descends from the sky to rescue her. I think we could get Bruder to play the dragon… Hmm, Matthew will definitely be competing with him for the role, so they’ll have to audition. What do you think about us changing Dick into a wedding dress now? Hahahaha…”
Damian: ...
The mature son of Batman disdains to participate in such a pointless joke.
However, none of them saw that Dick's eyelids, which had been closed, twitched slightly.
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