Chapter 23: The hotel experience was terrible; the underfloor heating was stiflingly hot and very uncomfortable. This time, Liu Chengxu didn't help Su...
The hotel experience was terrible. The underfloor heating was stuffy and uncomfortable. This time, Liu Chengxu didn't help Su Zhiluo clean up; he went to take a shower after finishing.
As the water poured down, Liu Chengxu's mind went blank for a moment, as if she had never experienced such joy before. Soon, she became a little more awake again.
She should be more reserved, otherwise she'll scare her sister-in-law away.
However, Liu Chengxu's self-control, like her age, lacked the ability to resist temptation. She was always just a little short. She was still immersed in the tug-of-war just now. Su Zhiluo wouldn't let her go. She pulled Su Zhiluo's fingers and placed them on her fingertips, indulging in fullness under Su Zhiluo's fingertips.
She was immersed in this intimacy, and vaguely felt that she had finally taken a step forward.
The moment Su Zhiluo's fingertips led her to the peak, she gazed into her sister-in-law's eyes, so close to hers—her own reflection clearly visible within them. This realization stirred her heart, as if she had finally confirmed her importance in the other's heart.
As the warm water washed over her body, Liu Chengxu began to seriously consider their future relationship. She told herself that she could no longer indulge in physical pleasure; excessive craving for intimacy would only make Su Zhiluo retreat. She needed to be more patient in understanding her heart and slowly move her with gentleness and understanding.
This thought calmed her down a little, but when she recalled her sister-in-law's gentle expression, the tips of her ears involuntarily turned red.
But my sister-in-law smells really good.
After taking a shower, she returned to bed and fell asleep with her eyes closed.
Liu Chengxu carefully moved closer to her.
She wanted to lean against Su Zhiluo, but Su Zhiluo was curled up, so she couldn't get close. Instead, she put her hand on Su Zhiluo's arm so that Su Zhiluo could lean against her and sleep.
Su Zhiluo, thinking she was about to do something, remained wary, but when she realized she hadn't done anything, she became puzzled. Wasn't Liu Chengxu going to help her wipe it?
Thinking about these things made her feel restless again. What was she thinking?
Su Zhiluo felt ashamed of this thought.
What's even more shameful is that when she helped Liu Chengxu, she actually had a reaction herself, and Liu Chengxu didn't even realize he had one.
This idea burned fiercely in her heart.
Her face felt burning hot.
In the middle of the night, Su Zhiluo woke up groggily once. Liu Cheng asked her if she was thirsty and fed her some water.
*
As morning light filtered through the gauze curtains, Su Zhiluo opened her eyes to see Liu Chengxu leaning against the headboard. Their eyes met, and Liu Chengxu softly asked, "Did you sleep well?"
"No." Su Zhiluo's voice was still sleepy, and her head was still a little heavy. "It's not as comfortable as home."
Liu Chengxu: "But it's still something to be happy about, it's the first time I've stayed in a hotel with you."
Su Zhilu smiled and said, "Then it's worth it."
She took a shower, and as soon as she came out, Liu Chengxu placed a pair of fluffy slippers next to her feet.
Then she was handed a glass of warm water. Su Zhilu thought of the glass of water from last night, which seemed to have been hot as well. When they first checked in, the two of them didn't plan to use the hotel's kettle, worried that it wasn't clean.
Liu Chengxu said, "I picked this up in the lobby on the first floor yesterday. This one is the same. Drink some water and relax for a while."
Su Zhi stood by the window, feeling much more comfortable in the breeze.
Liu Chengxu added, "I'd rather not buy a house here; it doesn't feel right."
Su Zhiluo laughed: "You make it sound like we have a lot of money."
Liu Chengxu said, "This is my dream."
Once Su Zhiluo felt better, the two of them went to the buffet restaurant together. Because their room was indescribable, neither of them was in a good mood.
Su Zhiluo comforted her, saying, "Let's eat our money's worth."
The hotel probably knew the stay wasn't great, so the buffet was quite nice, with a wide variety of options, including jianbing (Chinese crepes) and mousse cakes. Liu Chengxu and Su Zhiluo ate several pieces together.
When they checked out, the clerk asked them to leave a good review. The two of them agreed verbally, but didn't leave one after they left, and they were still feeling dizzy.
The two planned to go back that night, so they bought tickets in the morning.
We visited the attractions in the morning, bought local specialties in the afternoon, and each bought a candied hawthorn stick when we got back in the evening.
Liu Chengxu still delivered an important speech, firmly stating that he would not buy a house here, as it is a bit far from his workplace.
Su Zhiluo couldn't help but smile at her, finding her amusing.
At first, when the two lived together, Su Zhiluo really found her annoying. She would complain about everything and cry all the time. Later, she found her to be quite interesting. She would cry while doing her work, and when she finished, she felt very tired. Su Zhiluo poured her a glass of water, and she said that she would do the dirty and tiring work from now on.
Liu Chengxu is very considerate.
If she were truly an ungrateful wretch, Su Zhiluo wouldn't care about her at all.
The two bought some souvenirs and went home.
As night deepened, Su Zhiluo leaned against the headboard, secretly on guard. If Liu Chengxu continued to pester her like he had these past few nights, she would definitely lose her temper.
She glanced sideways and saw Liu Chengxu intently fiddling with her phone, her head resting on the pillow. The screen's dim light illuminated her face, outlining her focused expression. Su Zhiluo glanced over curiously; Liu Chengxu was adjusting the lighting and shadows of today's travel photos, bringing out warm tones.
At that moment, Su Zhiluo's tense heart suddenly softened.
The fatigue of their journey caused them to fall asleep as soon as their heads hit the pillow. That night, Liu Chengxu behaved himself and did not cross any boundaries, but simply held Su Zhiluo tightly from behind, like a vine nestled against a tall tree.
As dawn broke, Su Zhiluo woke up first. She turned to her side and quietly gazed at Liu Chengxu's sleeping profile—his usual stubbornness and passion had faded, and his eyes and brows now appeared exceptionally obedient and gentle.
Su Zhi lay on the bed for a while, then got up and made a simple breakfast. Her thoughts drifted far away; she wanted to go see Liu Jinhuan.
She went to see him a few days before she left.
Thinking about it, she felt she wasn't qualified to go. She took a breath; the morning breeze was chilly, and her nose stung terribly.
When Liu Chengxu got up, he saw her standing in the kitchen, wearing an apron. He told her not to cook, but to go outside and wait, saying that Su Zhiluo had finally come back and should rest.
Su Zhiluo smiled helplessly, raising her hand.
For the next few days, Liu Chengxu took care of all the housework. He cooked and did laundry, not letting Su Zhiluo lift a finger. Su Zhiluo was bored out of her mind and spent her days lazily lounging on the sofa. Liu Chengxu would sit down next to her and gently massage her shoulders.
Su Zhiluo felt like she was being spoiled. This leisurely life continued until Liu Chengxu's school started, meaning she had stayed here for six days.
During these six days, they sometimes went out and sometimes stayed at home to enjoy quiet time.
The day before her departure, Su Zhiluo bought incense and paper money alone and went to Liu Jinhuan's grave. She didn't say much, just stood quietly. The mountain breeze brushed her cheek, playfully tossing a few strands of hair.
"Stop fooling around," she said softly.
The wind seemed to have really stopped, and that restless strand of hair quietly fell back behind her ear.
On the way back, Su Zhiluo was filled with remorse. She sadly apologized to the air, "I'm sorry... I didn't mean to be mean to you just now."
She walked along the subway station towards the tenement building and saw Liu Chengxu slowly approaching on his electric scooter in the distance. Several shopping bags were piled on the back seat, making the small scooter wobble.
"Why did you buy so much stuff again?" Su Zhiluo walked over and asked her.
Liu Chengxu braced herself on one foot and glanced back at her bountiful harvest: "Not much. You'll be gone for half a year, this will only last for a month or two." She paused, her voice softening, "I'll send you more when you get to Guangzhou."
"Okay." Su Zhilu smiled.
A gentle breeze blew by, and Liu Chengxu gently smelled the incense scent clinging to her body, a cool and lonely fragrance brought back from the cemetery.
The day before she left, Liu Chengxu packed her things, wanting to give her everything.
Su Zhiluo sat on the edge of the bed watching her fill the suitcase.
After finishing what he was doing, Liu Chengxu turned to look at her and said in a muffled voice, "I'm sorry."
Su Zhiluo didn't understand what "I'm sorry" meant. She didn't delve deeper into it, thinking she might not have blamed her at all.
There is only a sense of helplessness that cannot be responded to.
This helplessness is like when Liu Chengxu holds her while she sleeps, she can't respond, it's like she's enjoying Liu Chengxu's kindness but can't give anything in return, she's a wicked person who craves pleasure.
She always felt grateful and couldn't accept Liu Chengxu's kindness for nothing.
To this day, she...
Su Zhiluo was also lost in confusion.
Time flies by too fast, there's nothing we can do about it.
To be honest, Su Zhiluo was reluctant to part with them, especially when she recalled the past few days they had spent together. They had mostly been smiling, but she felt a pang of sadness inside.
Liu Chengxu climbed onto the bed, gently sat on her lap, and buried his face in her arms. His forehead rested on Su Zhiluo's shoulder, and his voice was as soft as a feather: "Thank you for coming back to see me."
Su Zhiluo stroked her back, remained silent for a long time, and finally whispered, "I often think of you over there too."
Liu Chengxu looked up, her eyes gleaming with longing. She wanted to kiss him, but then she remembered his promise to Su Zhiluo: if he was willing to help her with his hands, she couldn't be willful anymore.
So she simply moved even closer to Su Zhiluo, like a plant yearning for sunlight, drawing nourishment from that warmth to survive.
She said greedily, "Will you think of me often over there?"
After that, Liu Chengxu lay obediently, not overstepping the bounds. Not long after, Su Zhiluo noticed something amiss; she heard a slight movement beside her. Liu Chengxu, like a child in the oral stage, was gently biting his index finger knuckle.
A strange restlessness stirred within Su Zhiluo. She couldn't quite describe the feeling; perhaps it was because she wasn't used to the other person's sudden restraint, or perhaps it was because she was influenced by Liu Chengxu's stoic demeanor, but she herself also felt a strange, indescribable longing.
*
It was windy when I left this morning.
Su Zhiluo originally planned to take her to school, but Liu Chengxu said that when Su Zhiluo was about to leave, she would still come to see her off.
Liu Chengxu bought a ticket to the next station and sat with her inside. Su Zhiluo carried all the things. As they went through the ticket check and walked in, Liu Chengxu picked up her suitcase and said, "Eat if you're hungry. I've prepared everything for you. There are self-heating packs inside."
"I know." Su Zhiluo got into the car.
Liu Chengxu hid his phone behind his back, his voice soft in the morning light: "Just this stop... let me ride with you for a while, okay? I'll get off when we get off and come back by myself."
Her eyes shone brightly in the dim light, like glass immersed in clear water. It wasn't much, just this short journey together, just this brief moment.
She knew there were still 2,000 kilometers between her and Su Zhiluo, but she would be content if she could just move forward a little further, to one more stop.
She wasn't very greedy; as long as Su Zhiluo gave her a little something sweet, she would be happy, and she would slowly move forward.
Last night, she tried her best to restrain herself and didn't do anything to embarrass Su Zhiluo. She cherished these last moments together and wanted to leave each other with warm memories.
Su Zhiluo nodded, and Liu Chengxu immediately went to get her suitcase, helped her put it in the car, and sat quietly next to her the whole time.
Su Zhiluo saw Liu Chengxu's eyes quickly redden, and his bright eyes were already covered with a layer of water.
She took a small cake out of her shopping bag and gently handed it to her.
"I won't eat..." Liu Chengxu's voice trembled with tears as soon as she opened her mouth. "I'll leave it for you to eat." She hurriedly wiped the tears from the corners of her eyes with the back of her hand.
Before Su Zhiluo could even take out a tissue, she felt both sorry for her and amused by her appearance: "I bought this especially for you."
Seeing Liu Chengxu looking at her with a puzzled expression, Su Zhiluo explained softly, "I was afraid you would cry."
Su Zhiluo still remembered the scene of their first separation. At that time, she was inexperienced and could only watch helplessly as Liu Chengxu chased after the car. That scene became a thorn in her heart, and she would always wake up in the middle of the night in Guangzhou with a dull pain in her heart.
She took out a tissue and gently wiped away the tear stains on Liu Chengxu's face: "Try it."
Liu Chengxu tried hard to control his emotions as he unwrapped the cake. He cut off a piece with a silver fork and put it in his mouth. The moment the sweetness melted on his tongue, his tears fell even more fiercely.
Su Zhiluo said, "Oh my god, tears fell into the cake. Doesn't it taste salty to you?"
Liu Chengxu had a sweet chocolate cake in his mouth. He wiped his fork, scooped out a spoonful, and fed it to her.
Su Zhilu thought.
She was actually a little reluctant to part with it.
Then take a bite.
She ate with her head down, the sweetness spreading through her chest. Even though they were sharing the food, she still felt sad.
This journey only takes forty minutes; Liu Chengxu will get off at the next stop.
Liu Chengxu was listed last.
People came and went on the platform. Su Zhiluo stood beside Liu Chengxu, the two of them standing silently in the noise. Liu Chengxu's eyes were still red, like peach blossoms in early spring.
Su Zhiluo's throat tightened, and her voice became somewhat dry: "The shop will be especially busy during the summer vacation, and I'm currently living with Chang Ruyin, so many things are not very convenient."
Liu Chengxu quickly looked up and said rapidly, "I know, it's okay. You don't need to rush back." She even tried to force a smile, but tears unexpectedly fell from her eyes. "We should work together to save money."
These words floated lightly into the noisy air of the platform, making it unclear whether they were meant to comfort the other person or to convince oneself.
"no……"
Liu Chengxu felt a sudden pang in his heart.
She knew that these past few days had felt like a dream, and she should wake up and be realistic.
She smiled at Su Zhiluo and said, "I don't mind these things."
Su Zhiluo took a deep breath and asked her, "Then what do you mind?"
What do you mind?
Liu Chengxu forced back her sadness. She hated her own eyes now; they were completely out of her control, like a valve that kept overflowing. This was so immature. She said, "I just mind... that you're ignoring me. I can live well on my own and keep the house in order. You can see that, right? The house is perfectly organized. It's just... I was thinking, could you call me twice a week, once on Wednesdays, even just for ten minutes..."
She spoke cautiously, afraid of saying too much: "Sometimes... I can be very obedient; I'll listen to whatever you say."
She paused, momentarily stunned. Was she being too ungrateful? She already had so much, yet she always wanted more. She recalled the first two days after Su Zhiluo returned; she was completely unrestrained, clinging to him like a wild animal, even boldly guiding his fingers to explore her wet secrets.
Today, Shijiazhuang is a bit warmer than Beijing, with the sun generously shining down, refracting a rainbow of colors in the air.
She always wanted to laugh, but each time she raised the corners of her mouth, it looked forced.
Su Zhiluo took out a tissue and reached out to wipe her face.
Su Zhiluo asked, "Are you done crying?"
Liu Chengxu bit her lip, held back her tears, and said seriously, "I didn't cry, I'm just a little sad."
Su Zhiluo said, "I live with Chang Ruyin, which makes things inconvenient. If you come over, you have to promise not to do anything, okay?"
Liu Chengxu was stunned.
It took me a long time to realize it.
Su Zhiluo granted her permission to go.
She couldn't hold back her tears.
Are you inviting me to come over?
Su Zhiluo replied slowly, "Mm."
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