Chapter 42: It was my own choice to cling to outdated methods.
Xu Yuewei's plane is at 5:17 PM tomorrow. There is no plan for the long day before that.
You can stay another day at the resort hotel, go horseback riding with Jinshu, or go to the airport several hours early to read novels to pass the time.
Because of this expectation that "tomorrow I can do as I please," she enjoys the moment before the unknown arrives, which is now.
But there are still variables.
She didn't ask him how he knew the news, but was just curious: "What's there to give? I'm not going to stay because of you."
“I didn’t intend to keep you.” She heard him clear his throat and say quite solemnly, “Really, I’m not lying to you.”
"Then I understand you even less."
There was a moment of silence on the other end, and just as she was thinking, "He's definitely making up an excuse," Jiang Shiyan spoke.
"...I don't want you to think of me in the future, and all you'll remember are these messy things from today."
"Let's leave with some lighthearted memories. Let's go to one of those trendy food streets and buy some grilled squid."
*
December 23rd, temperature below zero, weather: snow.
Xu Yuewei walked out of the hotel and saw a thin layer of white on the steps and the road. She looked up at the sky.
The first snow, which was delayed until today, only fell so little.
The black Cayenne rolled over the thin snow, leaving several tire tracks, and stopped in front of her.
"Are you cold? How long have you been waiting?"
"It's not cold, I just came down."
Jiang Shiyan got out of the car, naturally took her suitcase, pressed the lever, and put it in the trunk.
Where are your feet?
"It seems like everything's alright now."
Xu Yuewei sat in the passenger seat, looking out the window at the receding houses and bare trees. She thought to herself, "The day before I left my hometown, I promised my ex to create a new and final memory. Maybe if I filmed it as a vlog and posted it, I could get a good account."
Just then, I received a message from Jin Shu. She sent me a photo with a bright red heart, without saying anything else.
She took the photo from the window of room 3009, looking down with a telephoto lens. The man and woman in the photo are both wearing casual sneakers, and their down jackets are one dark blue and the other light yellow. They are both dressed in a minimalist style and are hard to spot in a crowd. They look like they are about to go on a trip.
...The video cover is already done.
Xu Yuewei was too tired yesterday and didn't want to get up early. She got up around noon, had lunch at the hotel, and of the remaining five hours, after deducting travel and waiting time, she could only give him two hours at most.
Xu Yuewei, still turning her head to look at the street scene, asked, "Are you really going to take me to eat grilled squid?"
"No, let's go eat roasted sweet potatoes."
"I mean, the food street is too crowded."
"I'm not going to the food street."
Jiang Shiyan glanced sideways, noticing the slight change in her expression, and smiled gently:
"I promised to give it to you, I won't kidnap you."
After driving for more than forty minutes, the car turned at the street corner and entered a gentle downhill slope.
The residential buildings next door were painted light pink, which looks a bit old-fashioned now, but it felt welcoming.
Xu Yuewei understood what he meant by "let's go eat roasted sweet potatoes".
They were heading towards Wuqiao No.1 Middle School.
The ending, which began at the very beginning, was both perfect and cruel. Xu Yuewei wanted to call him to stop and get out of the car, but reason persuaded her that there was no point in hiding. She was about to fall into the next sand pit.
Jiang Shiyan parked the car nearby, and they got out and walked. On the road, tall trees without green leaves were lined up at intervals, looking as neat as a reference diagram in a perspective textbook.
"Last time I came, I saw that the place where the old video store used to be had been turned into a ramen shop."
"I've already eaten."
"Then you'll eat with me."
The cold wind whistled against her down jacket, her face, and her fluffy fisherman's hat.
Xu Yuewei put on the hood of her down jacket, which blocked half of her vision to the left and right, so she could no longer see the people walking beside her.
The wind made it hard for her to open her eyes, so she squinted and looked around, finding everything pale and lifeless.
The next second, Jiang Shiyan's back suddenly squeezed into her narrow field of vision.
The short, dark blue down jacket covered him without making him look bulky, but she still preferred his youthful back view.
She was thinner than she is now, wearing a long down jacket, her chest open as she swept snow in front of the teaching building, standing out from the crowd, so that she could spot her from afar.
She suddenly had a craving for roasted sweet potatoes.
Seeing him stop at the entrance of the ramen shop without going in, Xu Yuewei followed him and saw the notice posted on the door, which made her laugh.
[My daughter is getting married, so our store will be closed for three days!]
"Are things going well lately? Why are so many people getting married?" she said.
Jiang Shiyan looked to both sides and saw a stationery store next to the door. He went in and bought a pink highlighter.
He uncapped the pen and carefully wrote in the corner of the black-and-red paper: Congratulations.
"The color is so light, will the boss be able to see it?"
"What if people don't like people writing on it?"
"Then you'll keep writing."
“I want to write.” He capped his pen and put it in his pocket. “It’s quite rare to come here and find a reason to take leave that you’ll probably only get once in your life.”
Further on, the entrance to Wuqiao No.1 Middle School was still the same as before. Even the security guards seemed familiar. They couldn't go in, so they stood in front of the gate for a while without saying a word. She took a step forward, and he followed.
She felt fine in her ankle when she woke up this morning, but after walking a lot, it started to feel uncomfortable again. It might just be a small dislocation, but it's causing her so much discomfort.
Xu Yuewei gradually slowed her pace and walked behind him.
She stared at the road beneath her feet. The thin snow had been almost completely trampled away by footprints and car wheels, melting into black, dirty shards of ice.
Just as she was relaxing and getting distracted, the heels of the sneakers that were moving at a steady pace suddenly stopped, and she almost bumped into them.
Jiang Shiyan turned around. He had pulled up his sweater collar to cover his face, and only his bright eyes could convey a slightly pleasant emotion.
He turned his shoulder, stepped aside, and showed her the street scene not far ahead.
Beneath a sycamore tree with snow-covered branches, a food stall owner is setting up his stall by the roadside.
The banner on the side, with the words "Grilled Squid" printed in yellow on a red background, stimulates the brain to hallucinate the aroma even before getting close.
Actually, Xu Yuewei doesn't eat at roadside stalls very often.
When she was little, whenever she looked longingly towards the source of the aroma at the school gate, the pulling force on her arm would silently increase.
She knew that it was her mother silently stopping her.
She followed behind her mother's determined and quickening pace, and sensing her mother's displeasure, she gradually stopped looking around.
Many years later, Xu Yuewei learned from her aunt that her maternal grandfather used to push a cart and sell sesame cakes to support his two young daughters.
However, after being driven away by urban management officers, he was involved in a car accident on the road.
My maternal grandmother had long since married far away and started a new family. Relatives adopted my mother and aunt, who had become orphans.
Her mother never told her about these things.
Knowing this, Xu Yuewei was secretly delighted.
She realized that it was simply because of the banners hanging on the roof of the tricycle and the oil-stained table.
Not letting her eat it wasn't because I didn't love her.
From then on, she began to grow up. She became a child who would not cry out in pain, but would remain silent, endure, and breathe in the shadows.
Later, Jiang Shiyan discovered that when she encountered roadside stalls, she would deliberately avoid them even though she wanted to eat there, as if she were executing some kind of program engraved in her genes.
He asked her if she wanted to eat it, and she said no. He asked again, and she still said no. He kept asking until she admitted that she actually wanted to.
He laughed at her, saying, "The cost of leading you into rebellion is too low."
He's the one who doesn't like eating at roadside stalls.
Despite complaining about the pungent spiciness and artificial flavoring, he still helped her clean up the leftovers without any complaints.
Now, 27-year-old Jiang Shiyan stopped, pointed to the stall, and said to her, "You see, I'll always be able to get something to eat."
Memories filter out from the cracks of time, the past and the present, without permission, mixed into a mass of matter whose original form is indistinguishable.
Jiang Shiyan raised his hand, palm up: "Go over there?"
At yesterday's wedding, the groom also reached out his hand, made a solemn vow, and took the bride's hand from his father-in-law.
In comparison, Xu Yuewei felt a mix of laughter and tears.
There's something else I want to stay for.
So she didn't take his hand, but walked towards the grilled squid stand.
"One skewer costs eight yuan, two skewers cost fifteen yuan," Xu Yuewei said to the stall owner. "Master, I want one skewer."
The vendor looked up at them and chuckled, "One skewer, right? Is that enough for the two of you?"
Jiang Shiyan said, "She just ate."
The scorching hot iron plate pressed down on the squid, and with a "sizzle," smoke and a long-lost aroma rose up.
Ten minutes later, Xu Yuewei took the grilled squid, which was about 20 to 30 centimeters long, with one hand, as if she were raising a thick shield for him.
She held it and walked back for a while, but still didn't eat it: "Here, take it. Didn't you say you wanted to eat it?"
"You eat first, the rest is for me."
She blinked slowly: "Isn't this a bit inappropriate?"
Jiang Shiyan turned around and blocked her way: "Why don't you just pretend you've traveled through time?"
Let's travel back to the time when we were still in love, when we shared a grilled squid, bit by bit.
Soft light fell on the woolen hat. Xu Yuewei lowered her eyes, her fingernails turning white as she gripped the bamboo stick.
Jiang Shiyan took a deep breath: "It's almost time, I'll take you to the airport."
He paused, then said,
"It was my own choice to cling to outdated methods, don't take it to heart."
Xu Yuewei felt that emotion welling up again. She opened her mouth slightly and began to breathe heavily.
An electric scooter brushed past them.
Is your foot alright?
He gripped her shoulders tightly, trying to provide support, but he pinched her so hard it hurt, and she instinctively waved her hand.
So when she looked up while holding the grilled squid, she saw a thick layer of oil smeared on his down jacket.
*
Three hours later.
Xu Yuewei sat on the plane, enduring the discomfort of ascent, and turned to look out the window.
Buildings, vehicles, and crowds converged into patches of gray or green, gradually shrinking and disappearing.
Instead, there was an orange-red sunset and clouds that appeared somewhat dark against it, with the light of the setting sun sandwiched between the two, stretching across the sky like a very, very long sword.
Jiang Shiyan's voice echoed in my mind.
"When you take off, remember to watch the sunset with me."
He pointed to the oil stain on his clothes and chuckled lightly:
"I can't let this be the last thing you leave me."
-----------------------
Author's note: Bye-bye~
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