Chapter 7 7. I Want to Be Close to You Too Much
The cyclist took off his helmet, revealing a lean, youthful face, though reeking of kitchen fumes. He looked at them, half-believing, and half-asking, "Zhuang Yongyuan? Xie Kang?"
Zhuang Yongyuan looked at him carefully for a moment, then asked doubtfully, "Du Jiahao?"
"It's me." The man named Du Jiahao got off his motorcycle and deftly pulled a pack of Zhonghua cigarettes from his pocket, handing cigarettes to Xie Kang and Zhuang Yongyuan. He smiled and said, "I saw Xie Kang at the store entrance just now and he looked familiar. I called a few times but got no response, so I finished my phone call and quickly came over to see him." He turned to Zhuang Yongyuan and said, "Long time no see. I didn't expect you to be here too."
"In front of the store..." Xie Kang turned his head and looked at the late-night snack stall.
Du Jiahao said complacently, "I opened it. I've already told the front desk that it's free for you."
"Don't be so polite." Xie Kang quickly refused. Du Jiahao of course refused. The two pushed and shoved each other for a while before Xie Kang reluctantly accepted.
After Du Jiahao finished dealing with Xie Kang, he patted Zhuang Yongyuan's shoulder affectionately and asked, "Why are you back?"
Zhuang Yongyuan said: "I accepted a performance in Pingnan."
Du Jiahao said enthusiastically, "You're a big star now. I knew you'd be famous sooner or later! Of your class at No. 1 Middle School, you're the best off right now, right?"
Zhuang Yongyuan waved his hand: "I'm just lucky."
Du Jiahao seemed to be very curious. He kept asking Zhuang Yongyuan if he knew any gossip about the entertainment industry. He also enthusiastically asked Zhuang Yongyuan if he was tired from performing and what else he did besides singing on stage.
Zhuang Yongyuan answered absentmindedly, and finally found a chance to interject his own question: "When did you return to Pingnan?"
Du Jiahao flexed his wrist and said, "After I graduated from culinary school, my aunt found me a job at a restaurant in Pingnan. I earned more than I could outside, and working with people I knew offered more opportunities, so I came back."
Xie Kang suddenly asked, "Have you contacted your father again?"
"Yeah." Du Jiahao seemed to be avoiding the topic and said, "Don't stand here chatting, it's late at night. Come back to the store with me and we can have a good time together."
"Sure." Zhuang Yongyuan agreed without asking Xie Kang, and casually said, "Since we happened to meet, why don't we go see Li Xiuyu together tomorrow?"
Xie Kang noticed that Du Jiahao had clearly tensed up. He lit a cigarette, took two deep puffs, and said, "You guys go. I won't go."
"Why not go?" Zhuang Yongyuan frowned.
Du Jiahao felt uncomfortable being stared at. He touched his face, scratched his hair, and stammered, "It's been a long time. His family doesn't want me to disturb him."
"Just going to take a look." Zhuang Yongyuan's tone softened.
"I have something else to do tomorrow, and you didn't ask me out earlier. Seriously, let me show you my schedule. I have a food safety meeting tomorrow morning, and a branch opening discussion this afternoon. I'm really busy tomorrow. Maybe next time. When will you be back next time?"
"Not even an hour?" Zhuang Yongyuan looked Du Jiahao in the eye. "That's Li Xiuyu."
"I know that was Li Xiuyu. But that was almost ten years ago." Du Jiahao's face turned pale, and he avoided Zhuang Yongyuan's gaze. "Back then, we were all ignorant and just joking."
"Are you kidding?" Zhuang Yongyuan asked back aggressively.
Du Jiahao was pushed to the edge by him and took off his polite mask at first: "What else? It's not like everyone is as lucky as you guys, able to be together forever, even working together."
"We're not together." Xie Kang denied, "I went back to Pingnan after graduation."
"You too..." Du Jiahao looked at Xie Kang for a while and said, "Oh, Pingnan is quite big. I just met you today. What are you doing?"
"Be a teacher." Xie Kang said, glanced at Zhuang Yongyuan, and continued, "Let's go, let's go see Li Xiuyu together tomorrow."
Du Jiahao asked Xie Kang, "Do you visit him often?"
Xie Kang noticed that Zhuang Yongyuan was also looking at him. He hesitated for a while, but still didn't want to lie to Zhuang Yongyuan, so he shook his head.
“How many times have you been there?”
Xie Kang said embarrassedly: "I haven't been there."
Du Jiahao shrugged at Zhuang Yongyuan and said, "Look, it's not just me who doesn't want to go. Xie Kang and Li Xiuyu have known each other even longer, right? It's all in the past."
Zhuang Yongyuan wasn't angry. Instead, he asked Du Jiahao humbly, as if begging, "Then let's go together tomorrow, okay?"
Seeing that he couldn't win the argument, Du Jiahao said desperately, "If you want to go, go ahead. But it's best to avoid his parents. His parents..."
Du Jiahao pointed at his head and said, "Something's not right here. If his parents recognize you, be careful they'll get harassed."
"Why don't you want to go?" Zhuang Yongyuan continued to argue, and Xie Kang wanted to persuade him.
The friendly smile on Du Jiahao's face disappeared completely, and his tone was full of anger: "Why do you have to ask why?"
Zhuang Yongyuan looked at him straight in the eye and said, "I just want to know."
Du Jiahao took a few steps back and got on his motorcycle: "I'm leaving first. We'll talk again when we have a chance."
"Are you married?" When Du Jiahao turned the handle to start the motorcycle, Zhuang Yongyuan held his hand and asked firmly.
"Yes, you are the smartest. Not only am I married, I also have a child. So I don't want to talk about the past anymore. I am living a good life now."
After Du Jiahao finished speaking, he stepped on the accelerator and rode away on his motorcycle, leaving Xie Kang and Zhuang Yongyuan standing under the completely broken street light.
Zhuang Yongyuan stood there in a daze, watching the remaining taillights on the road where Du Jiahao had left disappear into the darkness at the end of the road. Xie Kang rubbed his hands, wanting to say something, but when he mentioned Li Xiuyu, he felt guilty and didn't dare to speak.
Li Xiuyu is the blood feud between Zhuang Yongyuan and Pingnan that can never be reconciled, and is also the important reason why Zhuang Yongyuan has been unwilling to return to Pingnan for so many years.
When he was eighteen, the city murdered Li Xiuyu in front of them.
Xie Kang, who claimed that he would always stand on the same front with Zhuang Yongyuan, eventually chose to betray Zhuang Yongyuan and became a part of Pingnan.
Zhuang Yongyuan still stood there without saying anything. Xie Kang took out his cell phone from his pocket and handed it to him.
"You forgot your phone."
Zhuang Yongyuan took the phone, put it in his pocket, and suddenly started walking quickly as if a switch had been turned on.
"Shall I take you back to the hotel?" Xie Kang said.
Zhuang Yongyuan didn't answer and just walked forward.
"It's too late. You've drunk too much. I'm worried."
Zhuang Yongyuan's tone was cold: "Do I need you to be assured?"
Xie Kang smiled bitterly in his heart, but still followed him from two or three meters away. Zhuang Yongyuan didn't chase him away anymore, but just kept smoking, with smoke rising all the way.
His voice and musical instruments are the two things Zhuang Yongyuan treasures most, but ever since he reunited with Xie Kang, he has been smoking continuously, which has continuously damaged his voice.
They walked for a long time, one after the other, without saying a word. Silently, they passed the high-rise buildings, construction sites, and shopping malls of the new district. The deserted concrete buildings stood dark and cold, their windows staring at them like pairs of eyes, yet they only watched, doing nothing. As they crossed the pedestrian walkway under the cross-river bridge, the fog over the river blurred Zhuang Yongyuan's figure. As they walked along the densely packed uphill slopes of the old city, Pingnan was quiet at midnight.
When the sweltering summer heat of the day gave way to the damp autumn air of the night, Xie Kang finally understood where Zhuang Yongyuan was going. He wasn't going back to the hotel, but to his home on Kaiping Street. Although Zhuang Yongyuan hated Pingnan, he had a home there; that was an undeniable reality.
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