The gay man is next to me
Song Shuyang described what happened today in vivid detail at the dinner table, and even added a lot of exaggeration to the details. Song Nian's eyes were filled with emotion.
Finally, knowing that the person had left, Song Nian sighed, "Xiao Zhou is good at everything, but why is he so clueless about this aspect?"
Song Shuyang propped up his chin with chopsticks, "Mom, do you want Jin Zhou to fall in love?"
"Of course I do. Xiaozhou looks carefree, but he's actually quite thoughtful. He's lived here for so many years and still treats himself as a guest. Mommy just hopes he can get married soon and have a family of his own."
"You mean he's going to move out?"
"Of course. Otherwise, what do you think he's been working so hard for all these years? Mom doesn't want him to move out, but there's nothing I can do. After all, I'm not his biological mother..."
Song Nian almost let the cat out of the bag when he was talking, so he quickly shut up. Fortunately, Song Shuyang didn't think too much about it and asked again: "If he moves away, will he come back?"
Song Nian picked up some food for him and said, "Then I don't know. I'm not the worm in my brother's stomach."
Song Shuyang put the piece of meat into his mouth, but could not taste anything.
He seemed to realize that Jin Zhou was just a tenant in their house. If you rent, you have to move out. Sooner or later, Jin Zhou will move out. It is impossible for him to live under someone else's roof for the rest of his life.
Thinking of this, he became sad again. He felt that it was not because he was reluctant to leave Jin Zhou, but he was just not used to the fact that only the mother and son were left in the small western-style building.
Song Nian knew what he was thinking and comforted him, "But brother is a very sentimental person. He will definitely not forget you."
But Song Shuyang didn't want to forget. He wanted to go back to the past, back to the time when he and Jin Zhou played and quarreled. When he thought about someone appearing in the future to take Jin Zhou away, he couldn't help but pray viciously that person would come later.
After one night, Song Shuyang was surprised to find a swing in the flower garden. The frame was made of wood and fixed to the ground with cement. The main body of the swing was a bit like a park bench, spacious enough to accommodate two people, and there was a sunshade on the top.
This was much more advanced than the simple swing he had imagined. He couldn't help but sit on it immediately to experience it. The balance was very good and he didn't worry about swinging too high and falling over.
As soon as Song Nian went out and saw Song Shuyang swinging so hard that he was about to fly, she couldn't help laughing, "Is the swing made by my brother good?"
"Was this done by Jin Zhou?"
"Yeah, brother did it all night."
"Didn't he go to the store?"
"He said that he saw that you were always unhappy recently, so he took a day off to help you do this."
Song Shuyang couldn't tell what he was feeling, but he was still happy. He waved his hand and said, "Bye, Mom."
Song Nian went to work. It wasn't too hot in the morning, so he just sat on the swing and swung until he felt sleepy. Just as he closed his eyes, he heard footsteps approaching. He opened his eyes and saw Jin Zhou.
Song Shuyang said: "You're awake."
"I haven't slept yet."
"Then you won't go to bed?"
Jin Zhou smiled and said, "Let me check the quality of the work."
He shook the four supports vigorously, and they were all stable. Then he leaned over and asked Song Shuyang: "Could you move your noble butt so that I can experience it too?"
Jin Zhou rested his hands on the awning overhead, and in this position, Song Shuyang was completely enveloped by his body. Wrapped in Jin Zhou's clean aura, his hands and feet felt numb, and he slowly moved to the edge.
Jin Zhou sat down next to him.
He sat down, and Song Shuyang couldn't swing anymore. But he didn't want to beg Jin Zhou, so he could only wait for him to exert force. Unexpectedly, the swing started to swing, and Song Shuyang lost his balance and almost fell off. At the critical moment, Jin Zhou grabbed his waist and brought him back.
"careful."
Song Shuyang stood up suddenly. Fortunately, the swing was well balanced, otherwise Jin Zhou would have fallen flat on his face. He glared at Jin Zhou and wanted to say something, but in the end he said nothing and ran back to his room with a smoking head.
He couldn't stand Jin Zhou touching him, especially after that dream. Every physical contact made him extremely uncomfortable. He would repel Jin Zhou's scent, and the moment he touched him, his waist would ache, which had never happened before.
He buried his head in the quilt and tried to recall when things had started to become like this, and finally blamed everything on that absurd dream.
Jin Zhou knocked on the door outside, "What's wrong, Song Shuyang, did you bump into anything?"
Song Shuyang hummed, "I'm fine."
He took out his phone and sent a message to Guo Zixiu: [I'm going to buy a ticket to go back next week]
Guo Zixiu quickly replied: [Okay, once you’ve bought the ticket, please take a screenshot and send it to me. We can carpool back to school together.]
Song Shuyang randomly bought a ticket to Han City next week, took a screenshot and sent it to Guo Zixiu, then continued to bury his face in the quilt and act like an ostrich.
He didn't know what was wrong with him, but at least now his clear need was to go back to school.
He had to stay away from Jin Zhou for a while.
Knowing that he would be leaving next week, Song Nian felt relieved but also a little reluctant. "I was thinking of at least celebrating your birthday first."
"My birthday is on August 31st. It will be too late to go back to school after that."
Before college, Song Shuyang spent every birthday in fear of the upcoming school start, which led to him not looking forward to his birthday at all because it meant the end of the wonderful summer vacation.
But now, he felt that the summer vacation was too long. This summer seemed endless. He had only endured one third of it after a month.
He felt like he had to include summer among his most hated seasons, even though there were only four seasons in a year.
Song Nian told Jin Zhou that Song Shuyang was leaving next week. He just responded indifferently and went to work. This man made Song Shuyang's mood a mess, but his own life went on just fine.
The Sun Chaser band only performed twice before there was no further news. Song Shuyang looked at the private message on his phone asking him when he would do a live broadcast again, but he didn't know how to reply, so he pretended not to see it.
Time passed quickly, and in the blink of an eye, the day for Song Shuyang to return to school arrived.
Jin Zhou sent him to the airport and reminded him when they got there: "Be careful on the way. Let me know when you land and arrive at school."
Song Shuyang didn't say anything and didn't get out of the car.
Jin Zhou raised his eyebrows, "What's wrong, are you reluctant to leave your brother?"
Song Shuyang lowered his head and picked at his fingers for a long time before finally speaking, "Will I still be able to see you when I come back from winter vacation?"
"Why can't I survive the winter?"
Song Shuyang was very sensitive to the words "live beyond" and "winter" and said angrily, "Can you please stop talking nonsense? Who would curse themselves like that?"
"Then you ask again!"
"What I mean," Song Shuyang's voice became lower and lower as he spoke, "will you fall in love and move out before my winter vacation?"
Jin Zhou didn't hesitate for a second, "No."
Seeing Song Shuyang raise his head, he added: "I won't fall in love in front of you, is this okay?"
Song Shuyang finally felt relieved, and put away the worried look on his face over the past few days, and smiled at Jin Zhou.
"You bastard, wait till I have winter break."
Jin Zhou also smiled, "Okay, I'll wait for you."
After settling into his seat, Song Shuyang sent Guo Zixiu a message: [I'm on the plane. I'll see you when I land.]
He was about to turn on airplane mode when he saw a transfer message pop up on his phone. Jin Zhou transferred him another thousand yuan, with the same note as last time: [Travel expenses reimbursed]
The flight attendant came over and reminded: "Hello sir, please turn off your cell phone or switch it to airplane mode."
"Okay, sorry."
He confiscated it and turned off the phone.
Guo Zixiu was a little closer, so Song Shuyang had been waiting for almost an hour when he arrived. Seeing his best friend, Song Shuyang finally felt relieved. He instantly became his energetic self and chatted with him happily.
The taxi arrived, and the two sat in the back seat. Guo Zixiu said, "Tell me quickly what kind of dream you had that could keep a heartless person like you awake."
Song Shuyang glanced at the driver and coughed lightly, "I'll tell you when we get back to the dormitory."
He glanced at Guo Zixiu. Perhaps because of some subtle changes in his own psychology, he also felt strange about the men around him. Of the four people in the dormitory, the reason he had become close friends with Guo Zixiu was because of his good personality. Unlike Jin Zhou, who would confront him at the slightest disagreement, he basically told Guo Zixiu everything, and he always found comfort.
But looking at him now, he always tidies up before going out, and his bed always exudes a faint floral scent. Song Shuyang and he sleep on opposite beds, and his love of cleanliness is obvious at a glance. Compared with ordinary male students, he is indeed a bit too particular.
He was also very careful about his behavior when playing with me, and basically refused all physical contact. I didn't think much of these things before, but now that these clues are connected, I feel something is wrong.
But he was afraid of offending the other party, so he didn't ask any more questions.
The gate of Handan University is more than two kilometers away from the dormitory. Song Shuyang was already very tired when he dragged his oversized suitcase back to the dormitory. He didn't care about the dust on the bed that had been on it for more than a month. He spread out the suitcase and climbed up.
Guo Zixiu warned: "Don't lie up, Yangyang, be careful of allergies."
Song Shuyang waved his hand and said, "It's okay. I'm not that prone to allergies."
As expected, his words came true. He really had an allergic reaction and kept scratching his arms due to the oxygen, and broke out in rashes all over his body.
Guo Zixiu sighed helplessly, and took out the ointment from his drawer and applied it to him, complaining, "I told you it would cause allergies, but you just wouldn't believe it."
Song Shuyang rolled his sleeves up to his shoulders to make it easier for Guo Zixiu to apply the medicine. The moment their skin touched, he thought he'd feel as uncomfortable as he did when he was near Jin Zhou, but he didn't. He even had no reaction to the faint scent of shower gel on him.
This is strange.
As he painted, Guo Zixiu asked him, "Can you tell me about your dream now?"
Speaking of this, Song Shuyang scratched the tip of his nose sheepishly. He didn't dare to go into too much detail, and only slightly blurred the key information. "I just keep dreaming about hugging a man. Is this normal?"
"Dreams are a reflection of reality," Guo Zixiu screwed the lid of the ointment back on. "This might mean you like men."
Although he had a suspicion in his heart, thinking it in his heart and having it spoken out loud were two different things. Song Shuyang stuttered, "Really, is this true?"
Guo Zixiu moved a stool and sat across from him, then asked seriously, "Do you experience a quickened heartbeat and difficulty breathing when you're near a girl?"
Song Shuyang shook his head, "No."
"Okay, second question, when you see a girl dressed very sexy, do you have any thoughts of that kind?"
Song Shuyang still shook his head. Not to mention having any thoughts, he didn't even dare to look at it any longer.
"Third question, do you like watching military, historical, or romantic dramas?"
Song Shuyang tried to recall, "I think I should read a little bit of everything."
"One last question, when you do that, do you look at the same sex or the opposite sex?"
"Actually... I haven't had that experience."
"Huh?" Guo Zixiu's eyes widened, his face filled with disbelief. "Really? You're almost twenty and still haven't had that?"
Song Shuyang wiped his face, not knowing where to start.
He had never had any thoughts about that. Normally, the pool would overflow when it was full. He knew that Jin Zhou had experienced that, but when he curiously asked him what it felt like, he was kicked out of the room with a cold face. After that, he never thought about it again.
Guo Zixiu nodded, as if understanding. "It seems you've been suppressing it too much, so when your sexual orientation is awakened, you react so strongly."
Song Shuyang looked around nervously and said in a low voice, "Am I really gay?"
"I'm almost certain that you are gay."
"No way..." Song Shuyang's face turned bitter again.
He was still fantasizing about having a pure and beautiful campus romance, and walking on the playground with a beautiful girl at night. This sudden change was like being hit by a car and thrown ten meters away while walking on the road.
Then he realized something was wrong and squinted his eyes to examine Guo Zixiu. "You know all this so well, so you are..."
"Is there anything about me that would make anyone suspect I'm straight?"
"!" Song Shuyang was suddenly shocked.
There's a gay man next to me!
The gay man is actually me!
"You don't like me, do you?"
Guo Zixiu: “…”
Guo Zixiu: "A little bit."
Song Shuyang retreated several meters.
His best friend is not only gay but also has a crush on him. This is a huge mental shock to him!
But when he looked at Guo Zixiu, he found that he couldn't hate him.
Although Guo Zixiu's facial features are not that delicate, he has a good temperament. He has been practicing piano since he was a child, and he has a calm and elegant aura that makes people naturally like him.
He asked Song Shuyang: "Since you've never dated a man, why don't we give it a try?"
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