Chapter 490 I Love You No Less Than You
The lung pain would not be relieved for a while, and Li Jingshen could no longer wait. He searched for the location of Bai Qiujing's phone and asked someone to drive over.
Li Jingshen stared at the computer screen and vaguely saw his own outline, trapped inside in darkness, unfamiliarity, anxiety, and fear.
Since that New Year's Eve, he deliberately avoided reading any news about Shen Zhichu and Bai Qiujing.
But at this moment, he missed Shen Zhichu very much. It was a longing that could not be relieved. He wished she was right in front of him, to hear her voice, whether happy or angry, as long as he could see her standing in front of him safely, even if she humiliated him, scolded him, and beat him, he would be willing.
When Shen Zhichu disappeared, he was worried about what might have happened and what kind of accidents he might have encountered. Just thinking about it made his heart ache.
For Shen Zhichu, he could give up his own life, even though he was dying and a life was not worth much.
People are always obsessed with things they recognize at first sight.
Li Jingshen also tried to give up on Shen Zhichu and forget her. He even invited a hypnotist to hypnotize her, but he gave up every time he started. He couldn't forget Shen Zhichu and from then on they could only meet as strangers.
For a relationship like his and Shen Zhichu, once he chooses to give up, it will mean a permanent end.
Li Jingshen and Bai Qiujing met in the same place tacitly.
Both of them had ugly expressions. If they cut off the road from here, they would be heading to the suburbs. Without cameras, it would be difficult to track the car that kidnapped Shen Zhichu.
Bai Qiujing looked at the map and analyzed the terrain to find out the route Shen Zhichu might have been taken. Li Jingshen asked someone to investigate Lu Tingchuan. The two sides divided the work and cooperated with each other, and finally found Shen Zhichu's whereabouts again by following some clues.
There was an abandoned brick factory at the foot of a mountain in the suburbs. Bai Qiujing sat in the driver's seat and was about to start the accelerator when the passenger door next to him opened and Li Jingshen got in.
Bai Qiujing didn't have time to talk to Li Jingshen. Since he wanted to get on, then let him get on. The dim suburban road seemed to have no end. Bai Qiujing stepped on the accelerator frantically. The road became more and more remote and finally turned into a winding mountain road.
Bai Qiujing was very silent along the way, and every minute and second that passed was a torture for him.
Without location tracking, Bai Qiujing had no way of predicting what kind of situation Shen Zhichu was in. Would her kidnappers do anything to her? Was she scared now?
Bai Qiujing was afraid that the situation a few years ago would happen again, so he could do nothing and could only watch her suffer.
Li Jingshen also stared at the road ahead in silence. After a long moment, he finally glanced sideways at Bai Qiujing. His gaze was cold and careful, slicing every inch of his expression. Finally, he suddenly asked, "Do you want to know about my past with Shen Zhichu?"
Li Jingshen didn't know that Bai Qiujing had recovered his memory. While driving, Bai Qiujing had to listen to Li Jingshen attentively. He remembered that last year Li Jingshen used the same tone to say that he was just a substitute for Shen Zhichu.
To be honest, he should "thank" Li Jingshen here. If it weren't for him, he wouldn't have known that he had always been in Shen Zhichu's heart.
"Do you know how you bullied Zhichu in the past? How you forced her to death?" After saying that, Bai Qiujing pursed his lips, tightened his right hand on the steering wheel, and the car swayed somewhat out of control.
Li Jingshen shaved his head, revealing his very handsome features. However, due to his illness, no matter how good-looking he was, he looked sickly, especially at night when the cold air invaded and his lips turned white from blood loss.
Bai Qiujing only glanced at Li Jingshen through the rearview mirror and happened to meet his eyes.
Li Jingshen was very patient, he knew that, but now because of his extreme endurance, his eyes were red with a fine bloodshot color.
"You are not me. Shen Zhichu and I have been through so much. I love her. If you were me..." What Li Jingshen wanted to tell Bai Qiujing was that he loved Shen Zhichu no less than Bai Qiujing. He could give up his life for Shen Zhichu, just like in the three years after Shen Zhichu's death. He wanted to end his life many times, but when he thought of what Shen Zhichu said before her death, asking him to live to old age and not to die and pollute her reincarnation path, he didn't even dare to commit suicide. His life was worse than death.
Just as he said, if Shen Zhichu disappeared one day, he would go crazy. He loved her like a sick person and loved her like a devil. He was indeed crazy for three or four years until he met Shen Zhichu again.
He has lung cancer, and there is no medicine to treat it on the market. He doesn't have much time left. He doesn't have as much time as Bai Qiujing, and he is destined not to be able to stay with Shen Zhichu until old age.
His life was too short, how could he dare to delay Shen Zhichu.
Faced with life and death, he had to give up Shen Zhichu no matter how unwilling he was. He only hoped that he could get Shen Zhichu's forgiveness before he died, so that he could make up for the mistakes he had made in the past, and that Shen Zhichu could accompany him more before he died.
So, Bai Qiujing, you are not me. If you were me and were dying, wouldn't you want to see more of Shen Zhichu? Time is shortened, so how can you give up?
Bai Qiujing sneered. From the side, his lips seemed to be smiling, but there was no smile on his face. There was even a coldness in his eyes, like ice that could not melt. He opened his mouth and Li Jingshen listened to what he said.
"I'm indeed not you. If I were you, I wouldn't bully her at all, so don't compare me with you." If Shen Zhichu had married him first, he would have wanted to hold her in his hands and embrace her. Bai Qiujing had never even spoken loudly to Shen Zhichu. He couldn't imagine how Li Jingshen raised his hand to slap Shen Zhichu.
Li Jingshen changed the subject and said, "I originally thought Shen Zhichu wouldn't be in danger with you, but she's been kidnapped and threatened time and time again. What can you, Bai Qiujing, bring to her? Your fans are even humiliating her online. Since you can't give her safety, I won't let her go this time."
If you can’t convince him with the previous sentence, change it?
"Again?" This word was well chosen, Bai Qiujing said coldly, "Haven't you let go enough times? You want Zhichu to come back to you and taste the pain of being abandoned again? Li Jingshen, do I need to remind you how Zhichu died? How her fingers were crippled? Li Jingshen, I gave you a chance, but you didn't know how to cherish it."
Li Jingshen's pupils suddenly shrank.
Bai Qiujing calmed down, his eyes darkening. "I risked my life to save you, and because of it I lost my memory and became stupid for fifteen years. Li Jingshen, have you ever thought about paying me back?"
"Do you remember?"
"Yes, I remember now. If I hadn't remembered, would you have made up some more drama to continue to deceive me? When you asked me to return Shen Zhichu to you, didn't you feel any guilt in your heart? Li Jingshen, Li Jingshen, you are really the most shameless and shameless person I have ever seen. If it weren't for the fact that I had to beat you to death today, would I have returned it to you? Then can you return the healthy, happy and original Shen Zhichu to me?"
No one had wronged Li Jingshen; it was his selfishness that had harmed everyone. Bai Qiujing's face was sinister: "You are so despicable and filthy!"
Bai Qiujing really remembered everything. Li Jingshen had thought that he still had some hope before, but now that Bai Qiujing thought about it, he no longer had any chance.
Li Jingshen smiled self-deprecatingly. He turned his head to look at the darkness outside and felt a little cold.
Shen Zhichu once questioned why his heart was so cold, and she had been trying to warm it up for so many years but failed.
But she didn't know that when it's extremely cold and frozen into ice, it becomes brittle and will break with the slightest force. How could she dare let anyone hold her captive?
"You're right. I'm filthy and despicable. I knew she'd mistakenly thought I was you and loved the wrong person, but I kept it a secret from her. She was so confident she was usurping your position, trying to completely replace you. When I found out you were dead, I was actually quite happy, thinking that finally no one could threaten my relationship with Shen Zhichu. My feelings for her were no less than yours."
"Yes, you met Shen Zhichu first, but I was the one who was with him all those years. I have been with her longer than you. You said I don't deserve to love Shen Zhichu, but who defines what kind of love is worthy? It's like a pot of flowers. Your love may be watering and nurturing, but mine is like possessing and wanting to pluck it. Doesn't that make my love unworthy?"
A pot of flowers will die sooner or later. Some people love flowers by watching them wither in the pot, while others love flowers by making dried flowers or specimens to preserve for a lifetime when the flowers are at their most beautiful.
Both are love, whose love is shallower? His love for Shen Zhichu is no less than Bai Qiujing's.
Li Jingshen's words once again made Bai Qiujing underestimate his shamelessness. He let out a long breath, stepped on the accelerator, and the car roared off on the mountain road.
"So your love means her death?" Bai Qiujing had endured for more than ten hours on the plane, and his eyes were sore. Now, he was so angry at Li Jingshen that tears flowed from the corners of his eyes.
"Li Jingshen, don't use your love to bind Zhichu. She's not a flower." Bai Qiujing breathed heavily. "I used three identities to get to know her, and I'm only with her now. I've been with her for so long, but I don't even dare to speak to her loudly. She's a treasure you only meet once in your life. I'm afraid she'll melt if I hold her in my mouth, and I'm afraid she'll fall if I hold her in my hands. But you, on the other hand, tortured her to death while I was away. Do you know how afraid of pain Shen Zhichu is? How much she loves to cry?"
Li Jingshen's body stiffened. He hated his past self. If he could go back to the past, he would want to beat his past self to death.
Li Jingshen was like a deboned snake, with no strength in his body except for his jawline, which was tense. How could he not know that Shen Zhichu was afraid of pain and loved to cry?
Bai Qiujing's words were filled with resentment, and he wanted to kill Li Jingshen. But after he finished speaking, his throat choked as if someone had strangled him, and half of his anger disappeared, leaving only unprecedented sadness and despair.
After regaining her memory, she recalled the past when Shen Zhichu was brought back by Li Jingshen. Back then, Shen Zhichu who had not met Li Jingshen was even more proud and outspoken than she is now. It was Li Jingshen who ruined her and made her put away her outspoken brilliance.
It's like a hedgehog with its quills folded up. Once it loses its protection, only harm and death await.
If Li Jingshen had just taken over his place and been with Shen Zhichu, he wouldn't have hated him. But he should never have hurt Shen Zhichu, causing her to die in a fire on Christmas Day when she was 27 years old!
What rose in Bai Qiujing's eyes was hatred, anger, murderous intent, and destruction...
When we were almost there, it was already pitch black. All we could see was fields and hills, not even a house.
Bai Qiujing stopped the car, got out and scratched his hair. The cold water blew on his face, and it was already pale from the cold.
The car was parked far away and in a hidden place to avoid alarming the people below the mountain. The rest of the way had to be sneaked in secretly. Sun Li, with his experience, began to analyze the current situation and arranged for people to scout the environment first, then comforted Bai Qiujing and asked him to wait.
Five minutes later, the police also rushed over. The location was remote and the signal was somewhat interfered with. Three groups of people quietly went down to surround the abandoned factory and began to deploy personnel to formulate an assault plan.
Bai Qiujing didn't want to wait for a moment and wanted to rush down directly, but reason overcame emotion.
The factory is very large, so naturally they should disperse and block the entrances and exits first. Bai Qiujing and Li Jingshen had to cooperate for Shen Zhichu's safety.
The surroundings were unusually quiet, and any movement seemed to be a big noise.
…………
And Shen Zhichu inside had been given two electric shocks. Lu Tingchuan tried to use this method to make Shen Qing appear, but anyone with a normal brain would know that it was impossible.
Soul possession is beyond the reach of science, and using electric shock is not split personality. Even if it is split personality, such a rough method would not be used in the treatment.
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