Jiang Zhi sat in her simple yet cozy little apartment. The city lights outside the window were brilliant, but her heart felt as if it was caught in a fierce storm.
In front of her was a cup of coffee that was gradually cooling down. The rising steam was like her thoughts at the moment, slowly becoming blurred.
On the one hand, her heart was always entangled with the pain brought by Tang Junxi's murder.
It was a pain that went deep into her bones. Every time she recalled every moment she spent with Tang Junxi, the laughter, trust and companionship they had shared, it was like a sharp sword, piercing her heart fiercely.
She still remembered the trusting and warm look in Tang Junxi's eyes when he looked at her for the last time, but those eyes eventually closed forever.
This pain was like a burning flame, constantly burning her soul and driving her to avenge Tang Junxi.
This determination for revenge has become an indispensable part of her life, the driving force for her to move forward, and the life she lives in. She is afraid that once she accepts Shen Qingchen's feelings, she will be confused by the sweetness of love and forget the mission of revenge, or let the revenge plan go wrong because of her feelings.
She knew very well how insidious and cunning the enemy she faced was. If she slacked off even a little because of her sentimental feelings, all her previous efforts would be wasted.
On the other hand, Shen Qingchen's sincerity and persistence were like the warm sunshine in spring, melting the fortress in her heart that was frozen by pain and hatred bit by bit.
His affectionate eyes, gentle words and every little thing he did for her, like a trickle of water, slowly seeped into her heart.
The flowers he sent her every day, those beautiful flowers, although she always gave them to others, but every time she saw those flowers, a ripple would still appear in her heart.
Although she threw his love letter into the trash without hesitation, she still hesitated for a moment when throwing away those words written with sincere emotions.
The romantic encounters he created, whether it was the umbrella he opened in time on a rainy day, or the cup of hot coffee handed to her when she was tired, all made her feel a long-lost care and warmth.
She knew that this man loved her sincerely, without any hypocrisy or affectation.
She recalled the moments they had walked together, on that bustling street, Shen Qingchen blocked the surging crowd for her, his body was like a solid barrier, protecting her from the slightest harm;
In that quiet park, Shen Qingchen sat with her on a bench, silently listening to her talk about the hardships of her search for clues, without the slightest impatience, just looking at her with eyes full of understanding and support.
These memories are like precious pictures that keep playing in her mind.
However, whenever she wanted to open her heart to accept this feeling, the scene of Tang Junxi's tragic death would suddenly burst into her mind like a nightmare.
She felt as if she was standing at a crossroads. On the left was the dark and rugged road of revenge for Tang Junxi, full of unknown dangers and challenges, but this was the road she had to take;
On the right is the road of love full of sunshine and warmth given by Shen Qingchen. There is sweetness and happiness there, but it may also make her lose her way.
She didn't know how to choose, should she stick to her belief in revenge and lock her heart in pain and hatred forever, or should she bravely take that step to embrace the love given by Shen Qingchen and let her life be filled with sunshine again.
She began to pace around the room, her steps messy and heavy, and every step seemed to carry her inner struggle and contradiction.
Her eyes wandered around the room, from the simple paintings hanging on the wall, to the small items related to Tang Junxi placed in the corner, to a small souvenir given to her by Shen Qingchen on the table.
These seemingly ordinary things were like silent judges at this moment, questioning her inner thoughts.
She walked to the window and looked at the flashing neon lights outside. The lights became blurred in her eyes, just like her confused thoughts.
Her hand was tightly gripping the window handle, her knuckles turning slightly white from the force.
She thought of her grandfather Jiang Yan, who had been silently supporting her revenge plan, giving her time and trust.
If she accepted Shen Qingchen’s feelings now, what would grandpa think?
Would Grandpa think that she was a weak-willed person who would give up her family mission and commitment to her friends for love?
Moreover, she herself was not sure whether Shen Qingchen's family could accept a woman like her who was carrying the mission of revenge.
She knew that Shen Qingchen's family had a very high status and influence in the business world, and their family affairs and interpersonal relationships were complicated.
His existence may bring a lot of trouble to Shen Qingchen, and even affect his family reputation and career development.
At the same time, she was also worried that her road to revenge would bring danger to Shen Qingchen.
Her enemies are so cruel and unscrupulous that if they find out that Shen Qingchen is close to her, they will probably attack Shen Qingchen.
She couldn't drag Shen Qingchen into this dangerous vortex because of her feelings.
She loved him, so she didn't want to see him get hurt because of her.
This love and worry for Shen Qingchen, intertwined with her determination for revenge, made her heart even more painful.
She sat back down on the couch, her head in her hands, trying to clear her mind.
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