That day, Yu Zeng met his mother, his biological mother.
Then he realized that his mother was still alive.
But his mother's legs were completely disabled, and she seemed to have experienced a lot of unimaginable torture. She was not in a good mental state, but she still recognized him. When she saw him, she called out his name with surprise the first moment.
He was afraid, but could not refuse to recognize his mother. He owed his mother too much, far more than just giving birth to her.
That day, in that dim room, there were only the mother and son hugging each other and crying, and Prince Rong Li Yin.
"At that time, I was extremely grateful that my mother was still alive, but I was more afraid of the fact that my identity as the son of a sinner would be exposed..."
Yu Zeng's tone of recollection no longer had the relief and fear he had back then. He was like a bystander, somewhat numbly saying, "But Prince Rong told me that he had passed through Yanzhou when he was traveling a few years ago, and met my father by chance. They got along quite well... He also believed that my father was a man of great virtue and would not do anything corrupt, even though he could not find any evidence to prove my father's innocence."
It was then that he learned that Princess Rong's father was one of the officials responsible for investigating the Yanzhou corruption case. It was because of this that Prince Rong accidentally saw the wanted portraits of him and his mother.
"Prince Rong told me at that time that his influence was not important and he did not want to get involved in the muddy waters of officialdom, so he could not overturn my father's case, but he could keep the secret for me and take care of my mother."
Many years later, he couldn't help but wonder, was what Prince Rong said at that time really true? Did Prince Rong and his father really know each other?
He had no way of tracing it back.
But the nine-year-old boy believed it firmly and was extremely grateful.
After hearing this story, Chang Suining said without any emotion in his tone, "So, he treated you with kindness at first, not coercion."
No one knew whether Prince Rong had already developed ulterior motives at that time, but what she knew was that her young uncle was indeed very good at "being kind to others."
He also taught her with a smile that it was important to make good friends.
She remembered it very clearly, and he did a very good job himself.
"Yes..." Yu Zeng lowered his eyes and said, "I was a little uneasy at first, but he never asked me to do anything, not even to get any information."
Year after year, Prince Rong remained free and easy, and his mother was well taken care of, so he slowly let go of his uneasiness and regarded Prince Rong as a kind-hearted and respectable benefactor.
"Until that year, I thought I was right and wanted to find your relatives for you." Chang Suining's eyes were a little distant: "But you still chose to keep the secret."
"Your Highness has been so good to me that I am extremely grateful and overwhelmed..." Yu Zeng remembered clearly that it was in the army that year. His Highness was only thirteen years old. He had just had a few people willing to follow him and had just grown some wings. They were thinking about finding his mother and brother for him.
He was very panicked and said that after so many years, the person might have passed away.
But His Highness smiled and told him that he should always give it a try.
Therefore, he could only hand over the wooden safety lock that he had been carrying with him to His Highness with both hands.
Afterwards, he asked His Highness about the progress several times, but His Highness said every time that there was no news yet.
He secretly breathed a sigh of relief in his heart, but suddenly one day, the prince left the military camp for something. Chang Kuo, who was just a small military general at that time, found him with a smile and told him that the person had been found.
He also told him that it was not certain before, and His Highness was afraid that he would be disappointed, so he said that there was no news yet.
He was completely unprepared when he saw the mother and son.
The woman had white hair on her temples early on, and although she had changed her clothes, it was still obvious that she was living a very hard life.
The boy she was holding was very thin, only about eight or nine years old, so when they separated that year, the boy obviously didn't remember anything. When he first saw his "brother" whom he could rely on, he rushed up to him without hesitation and called him "brother", and took out an identical wooden carved safety lock to prove his identity.
The woman was obviously hesitant, and asked in Yanzhou dialect, "A Zeng, is that you? You've grown so big that I can't recognize you..."
But her son's name is Yu Zeng, so the safety lock can't go wrong.
[Of course, an eight-year-old and a fourteen-year-old look different!] Chang Kuo laughed and said, [I checked it out, there is no mistake, you three can talk!]
After Chang Kuo left, only the Yu family's "mother and son" were left in the tent.
The woman walked up to him, grabbed Yu Zeng's arm, lifted his sleeve in panic, and looked at his left arm.
There is no birthmark there...
The woman's tears suddenly fell like rain.
The second son was still calling "brother" eagerly.
"Yu Zeng" knew that the woman already knew that he was not the original Yu Zeng, and she could even guess that her real eldest son was dead.
But to his surprise, when the woman raised her head, she cautiously asked him tentatively if he still remembered his childhood.
"Yu Zeng" understood her thoughts.
The woman who lives with her young son has a very miserable life and is terrified by it.
[I had a high fever while fleeing, and I can’t remember many things…] He just made the best of it for the time being and said ambiguously: [I only have this wooden lock on me, and I only remember my name.]
The tears in the woman's eyes became more violent, but she burst into laughter and hugged him tightly, as if holding on to a life-saving straw: [There is no mistake... You are my son! My poor son! ]
He hadn't intended to keep it a secret forever.
But he was only fourteen years old at the time and did not know what was truly serious. When he returned to Beijing with the army the following year, he went to see his mother and asked the benefactor in his eyes whether he should confess all this to His Highness.
At that time, Prince Rong sighed and said to him: "A Shang is young and full of vigor. He has just been exposed to the spirit of the army. He has a clear distinction between love and hate, and he hates deception the most... Wait a while until the time is right."
He chose to "wait a little longer". During the waiting process, he became more loyal and diligent due to guilt and uneasiness, so the prince treated him more and more.
Later, His Highness became the Crown Prince, and he became the most trusted attendant around the Crown Prince.
He began to think hopefully that maybe it could go on like this. He had no ill intentions towards His Highness. He and Prince Rong had just kept a secret about his life experience, and His Highness and Prince Rong were so close...all of this could coexist.
Everything depends on this thought.
A long time later, he recalled that if Prince Rong had shown any intention of threatening His Highness during those years, he would never have dared to entertain such a fluke...
"I was so self-righteous and stupid back then that I never had any defense against Prince Rong..." Yu Zeng burst into tears, tormented by regret: "At that time, I was thinking that His Highness treated me so well, so well that I didn't dare to take the risk of telling the truth, for fear that His Highness would be disappointed and disgusted with me..."
"But you have unknowingly taken the biggest risk in the world." There was no joy or anger in Chang Suining's voice.
What happens next is easy to imagine.
The mother and son from the Yu family in the capital were indeed Yu Zeng's family. She had never made a mistake back then - the fake one was Yu Zeng who was by her side.
Therefore, Yu Zeng could accept the mother and son as a cover under the emperor's feet over the years, making the emperor mistakenly believe that they controlled everything about him. This is the truth of human nature.
But the weakness that he really cares about is always in Li Yin's hands.
"That year, Prince Rong found me and asked me to write a letter to Yu Xie, in which he asked Yu Xie to secretly drug His Highness so that he could leave Bei Di..."
Yu Zeng was not stupid, he immediately realized that this plan was ridiculous.
After a moment, he realized that this was not about saving His Highness, but about killing Him.
But he had no doubt about Prince Rong, and he subconsciously asked: [Prince... who wants to kill His Highness? Is it those officials? Or His Highness's mother? ]
Do they not want His Highness to become a hostage of the Northern Di during the war? To prevent His Highness from being humiliated? To prevent the army from losing morale? So they want His Highness to die? !
Or does someone know His Highness's secret and therefore doesn't want His Highness to come back?
[Those officials were indeed afraid that Ah Shang would become a hostage. They had tactfully expressed their concerns at the morning court.] At that time, Li Yin speculated in a bystander's tone: [As for the Queen, she probably doesn't want Ah Shang to get into trouble. Ah Shang is a sharp blade, and she is the only person in the world who can control this blade.]
He said frankly: [It is I who do not want Ah Shang to come back.]
At that moment, Yu Zeng almost froze.
The benefactor's transformation came without warning or transition.
Even at this moment, her tone was still calm: [I didn't expect Ah Shang to be able to hold on until today. She is so proud... I thought she wouldn't be able to hold on for much longer.]
Li Yin even expressed some genuine sympathy: [These three years, thousands of days and nights, I dare not imagine how she managed to hold on, but even I cannot imagine it...]
[Being able to walk out of the desperate situation in the eyes of the world alive, she is no longer an ordinary person. 】
[If she is not broken, she will be better than before. I feel that such Ah Shang is respectable, but also scary.]
[I don't want to have a confrontation with her, so let her stay in Beidi as Chongyue.]
Yu Zeng couldn't remember what he said at that time. It was probably some confusing questions and weak pleas.
When Li Yin stood up to leave, he said to him: "A Shang has suffered a lot in her life, you should just help her get rid of it."
relief?
How could it be a relief? Your Highness has been holding on for so long, how could this be the kind of relief he wants? He hastily grabbed King Rong's robe: [Your Highness is willing to make peace with the Northern Di for the sake of the stability of the country. This time on the battlefield, you will definitely use your last bit of strength to help our dynasty win. You can't...]
[I can't look down on her like this. Do you think she will escape in the middle of a battle?] Prince Rong didn't turn around and said, [I have never looked down on her ambition, but she is not an ordinary person. She has subordinates who are more loyal than you. She will not be without plans in the three years in Beidi. When dealing with extraordinary people, you naturally need to seek more security to feel at ease.]
In other words, he knew that Li Shang might die for his country, but he still wanted to take action.
Prince Rong left and ordered people to guard this place.
Yu Zeng had not eaten for two days. On the third day, Prince Rong sent his mother to "persuade" him.
His disabled mother cried and hugged him, only half conscious. She said, "You have to survive," "Those people are cannibals," and "You have to listen to your benefactor"...
For the next two days, my mother only complained of being hungry.
It was this feeling of "hunger" that finally defeated him.
He thought about everything that happened during his escape. He could die, but he could not abandon his mother again.
He couldn't remember how he picked up the pen to write the letter. At that time, he was extremely clear-headed and tense, yet also in a state of confusion.
After sending the letter, he hoped that Yuxie would not obey his arrangement, and would report him to His Highness!
But... he himself was not able to be loyal enough, how could he ask others to be loyal? On the contrary, his betrayal would only encourage Yu Xie's betrayal, right? He waited in fear and waited for the news of His Highness's death.
His Highness committed suicide...
He suddenly felt morbidly relieved - so, could it be that His Highness had never drunk the poison? In this case, he would not be considered a traitor!
Until he heard that Yuxie was still alive... Yuxie should not have been alive, but she survived. It turned out that His Highness had made some secret arrangements. It was His Highness's arrangements that saved Yuxie.
Yuxie survived, but also went crazy.
He met Yuxie once, but Yuxie didn't dare to look at him and didn't say a word about his letter... At that moment he understood that Yuxie had betrayed him.
Yuxie's betrayal also confirmed his betrayal.
His delusion of trying to deceive himself was also shattered.
He had been seriously ill. Ironically, his old friends all thought that he was hit hard by the death of His Highness, which caused his temperament to change drastically, so no one blamed him for his coldness and morbidity.
Only he himself knew that he had gone completely crazy.
At one point, he hated everyone, hated Li Yin, hated Empress Ming, and hated himself even more.
But his mother is still alive...
He has to continue to live like a madman.
That year, the great defeat of the Northern Di cavalry greatly deterred the forces that were ready to make moves, and also allowed Ming, who controlled the Xuan Ce Army, to further tighten her political power.
She began to purge the court and the country and eliminate dissidents. Even a seemingly idle person like Prince Rong went to Yizhou and took his mother with him.
The empress chose to employ him. After all, she had to employ people. At least their abilities and loyalty had been tested by Her Highness.
He became the head of the Sigongtai, a close confidant of the emperor, and a puppet of the Rongwang Mansion in Yizhou.
The breeze ruffled the surface of the water, and the fish's tail created circles of ripples.
"Until last autumn... my sick mother passed away." Yu Zeng said in a hoarse and slow voice: "Prince Rong did not tell me, but I already know."
To be frank, the moment he got the news, he felt like the shackles on his body had disappeared.
He could finally do something... What could he do? No matter what he did, His Highness would never come back.
But now...
Yu Zeng finally mustered up his courage, raised his hand and grabbed a piece of soft gauze. He raised his head and knelt there, as if he was no longer the head of the Sigongtai who was above thousands of people, but still the little eunuch in the past, still calling out: "Your Highness..."
He wanted to say, "Your coming back is the greatest blessing in my life," but he knew he was not worthy of saying so.
"I have heard your story." Chang Suining lowered his eyes and looked at him: "I think I should thank you for two things."
"I want to thank you for not exposing the existence of Deng Tailou and Meng Lie over the years, allowing them to survive in peace."
"I also want to thank you for choosing your mother when you had to choose between the two options. This saved me from having to bear such a heavy debt without knowing it."
"You did nothing wrong in this matter. If it were me, I wouldn't necessarily do better than you." Chang Suining said, "But this is a dead end for human nature. I can understand it, but I can't forgive it."
Yu Zeng shook his head with tears in his eyes: "How dare I ask for your forgiveness..."
"But Ah Zeng, after hearing all this, I just feel very sorry." Chang Suining looked at him and said, "This dead end didn't have to happen."
She asked, "In the past ten years, have you never thought about confessing your identity to me?"
"I have thought about it... I have thought about it hundreds of times." Yu Zeng's eyes were filled with tears of self-mockery: "But Your Highness treats me too well, I am too greedy, too afraid..."
Having had such experiences and getting so many good things, he became the most cowardly person in the world.
He didn't want His Highness to be disappointed in him, and he didn't want the trust he had gained by chance to be tainted...
However, if he could have anticipated that these minor flaws would one day become a mountain between him and His Highness, he would never...
"Although I was young at that time, I should have had some courage to see if there was sincerity behind the lies." Chang Suining was also trapped in this "if" for a moment: "If you could tell me who you are and your mother's existence earlier, I would still go to Beidi, or I would still die in Beidi——"
"But today, when you and I meet again, it doesn't have to be like this."
This is what she regrets.
Yu Zeng also followed her words and imagined the same thing. This assumption was so beautiful that it completely broke him down.
He loosened the corner of his clothes, fell to the ground, buried his forehead in the ground, and sobbed.
Time seems to have stopped in this pavilion.
After an unknown amount of time, Yu Zeng heard a voice above his head, asking, "So, what's your name? Your original name."
Faintly, this voice seemed to overlap with the voice of the eight-year-old girl in the side hall of the elephant garden many years ago.
He wanted to replace the young eunuch, so he changed his words and answered: "My name is Liu Mingke, from Yanzhou, the son of the criminal Liu Shen. I was separated from my mother while fleeing..."
Time will not turn back, and he answered too late.
"Liu Mingke——" Chang Suining said: "I will not kill you today, you can go first."
Yu Zeng raised his head slowly and blankly.
"I want to kill someone else." The girl stopped looking at him. She changed her sitting position, hanging her legs over the pavilion railing, facing the water, and said calmly: "Besides, I don't need to accept her favor and follow her instructions step by step."
Chang Suining never said clearly who "she" was, but Yu Zeng understood it.
"You should have thought that you came to Jiangdu because she was suspicious of you." Chang Suining said, "But she was just suspicious and could not confirm it. She sent me a secret letter and must have tried to 'remind' the Rong Palace. She wanted to use Li Yin to verify your authenticity. If you are Li Yin's man, the world is in chaos today, Li Yin will definitely choose to abandon you and try to kill you on your way back to Beijing to prevent you from revealing secrets that you should not reveal."
"But why did she tell me specifically?" Chang Suining analyzed, "Besides showing goodwill to me and making me suspicious of Prince Rong's Mansion, she probably had another consideration - she must have thought that even if you are innocent, Li Yin might still kill you."
Take advantage of the situation to confuse attention and protect the real insider of Prince Rong's Mansion in the capital.
"In this case, I can be of use." Chang Suining said, "She reminded me. Given my personality, I will definitely prove to you whether you have colluded with Prince Rong. As former master and servant, you are now trapped in Jiangdu, so it will be much easier for me to verify it in person."
"If you are really a traitor, King Rong doesn't have to come and kill you, but I won't tolerate you either."
"If you have been misunderstood and wronged, I will do my best to protect you from Prince Rong. If I fight Prince Rong's men because of this, I can probably also make an enemy of Prince Rong's Mansion in Yizhou."
"Maybe there are other considerations... but forget it." Chang Suining was too lazy to continue, and only said: "Right now, I am the one who knows the most about the whole situation. There is no reason to act according to other people's expectations."
The empress only suspected that Yu Zeng was Prince Rong's spy, but she didn't know that Prince Rong had poisoned her in the past.
Prince Rong knew everything, except who she was.
In this case, she should do the opposite and do whatever is beneficial to herself.
After hearing this, Yu Zeng tried to ask: "I wonder if I am still of any use..."
"The situation is unpredictable." Chang Suining stood up without comment and walked out of the pavilion: "In short, you should leave Jiangdu as soon as possible. Right now, I will not let you die and let others get what they want."
Yu Zeng replied with tears in his eyes: "Yes, thank you, Your Highness...", then bowed his head and knelt to see her off.
When Chang Suining walked down the wooden bridge, he paused slightly, looked back, and saw Yu Zeng still kneeling in the pavilion, not moving at all.
The garden is bustling with spring colors, the flowers and plants are fragrant, and new butterflies are flying around.
Chang Suining was walking on the path. He stopped under a camphor tree, looked at the bright sky through the gaps between the branches and leaves, wondering what he was thinking.
Soon, Adian came running over along a small path.
Adian called her, but she didn't respond.
Ah Dian followed her example and looked up at the sky. After a while, he asked in a low voice, "Your Highness, why are you unhappy?"
"Adian is a puppy, right?" Chang Suining retracted his gaze, turned to look at the tall Adian, and asked curiously: "Otherwise, how can you always smell that I am unhappy?"
Ah Dian looked proud and forgot to investigate for a moment. He picked up the garland he had woven and handed it to her: "Don't be unhappy, this is for you!"
Chang Suining looked and saw that it was woven with tender willow branches and dotted with goose yellow forsythia flowers.
Seeing that she didn't take it, Ah Dian raised his hand and helped her put it on, nodding his head in admiration: "It looks good!"
Chang Suining raised his hand to support it, and said with a smile: "It turns out that Adian can not only smell it, but also prescribe medicine."
Ah Dian scratched his head and grinned: "Then I am the puppy doctor!"
He doesn't like being called a puppy, but in order to make Chang Suining happy, he is willing to call himself a puppy.
He even rolled his eyes in a clever way and said, "I know a better prescription!"
"Tell me about it."
"It's delicious!" Ah Dian said seriously, "It can also cure your unhappiness!"
"Well...it's time for lunch."
Chang Suining nodded in agreement, finally raised his foot and walked forward.
The answer she wanted was now clear, and everything she wanted to say had been said. She could no longer be trapped in the past and regrets, as there were still many things waiting for her to do.
Because we don’t want to have any more regrets, we must take the road ahead carefully.
The world is unpredictable, with gains and losses.
Just like that one afternoon, after the welcoming banquet held by Jiangdu officials for Chang Suining ended, Chang Suining waited for the person she had been waiting for for a long time.
Six thousand words, daily updates and additional 2,000 words are posted together, not divided into chapters, so you can read it in one go.
(When I was sorting out the plot, I looked back at Chapter 418 and found that I had missed a part of the empress's action logic. I made up for it in the early morning of the day before yesterday, so that the logic of the empress letting Yu Zeng come to Jiangdu is more complete and smooth. (But there is no need to look back specifically, it is roughly stated here from Ningning's perspective) From time to time, the minor flaws in the front will be fixed, but they will not affect the reading as a whole, and the genuine channels will be updated accordingly) I would also like to thank everyone for supporting original and genuine reading.
Good night! Sweet dreams~
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