Chapter 11
After the second period, it was break for morning exercises. After using the restroom, Zhang Xiaotian headed for the playground. The Athletes' March was still playing on the radio. The track was filled with students in blue uniforms, gathered by class, chatting and playing, but not yet forming lines. Zhang Xiaotian hadn't yet recognized everyone in the class, so he could only walk in the general direction. Someone greeted him as he passed Class 4, but he simply responded.
After walking a few steps forward, Zhang Xiaotian heard someone calling him from behind. He turned around and saw it was Lu Bai, with a few other boys beside him. Zhang Xiaotian thought about it and decided that since he didn't know where Class 1 was anyway, he walked towards them.
"Classmate, I've called you several times!" Lu Bai said to him with a smile. Zhang Xiaotian was about to explain that he didn't hear it, but the boy next to Lu Bai spoke first:
"I don't even know you, how can I bother with such an annoying person like you?"
"Hey, what are you talking about? This is my deskmate!" Lu Bai said with a "tsk" sound, "Didn't you see my deskmate came over as soon as he saw it was me?"
Zhang Xiaotian listened to Lu Bai and the other man's bickering while quietly studying the man who was speaking. He had a complexion so dark that it was almost impossible to tell the line between his dark circles and his underlying skin. He was tall, appearing to be more than half a head taller than Lu Bai, who was standing next to him. However, he was also very thin and had a slight hunchback, which made him look frail.
"Damn, if you say we have a good relationship, then we have a good relationship." The boy rubbed his head and scanned Zhang Xiaotian up and down. Zhang Xiaotian stood still, letting him look at him.
Lu Bai slapped his head and said, "Oh, I forgot to introduce you. Deskmate, this is Li An, the monitor of our class."
Li An straightened up slightly when he heard that. Seeing that Zhang Xiaotian just nodded, he snorted lightly and hunched back down again.
The students in front of the rostrum were lining up. A few of them looked over here and waved. Li An put one hand in his pocket, raised the other and waved at them. He turned to Lu Bai and asked, "Are you going?"
"Let's go!" Lu Bai nodded in agreement and called Zhang Xiaotian, "Let's go, desk mate. Our class is over there."
Zhang Xiaotian followed them. Lu Bai and Li An both went to their respective seats. Zhang Xiaotian had no place, so he stood at the end of the line. Not long after, a whistle blew over the radio, and the classes began running. Northern drills favored a "tofu block" formation, with the front and back rows so close together that, frankly, if someone farted, no one would be able to avoid it. However, Zhang Xiaotian was in a separate line, with no one behind him. When he followed the line, he deliberately lagged behind, keeping a decent distance from the front.
Before the four laps were even halfway through, some people slipped away to the restroom or the store under the pretext of leaving the group to tie their shoes. Someone in front of Zhang Xiaotian also slipped away, and the others automatically filled the vacancy. Zhang Xiaotian moved one person to the side, still standing alone in the last row. As he ran, his mind was empty, his eyes wandering aimlessly, finally settling on Lu Bai, who was standing in the front row despite being tall. Lu Bai ran in a jerky manner, and a tuft of hair on his head swayed with his steps. Zhang Xiaotian was distracted by the tuft of hair, not paying attention to his feet, and stepped on the heel of the student in front of him.
"Hey!" The man in front of him jumped in surprise. Zhang Xiaotian came to his senses and quickly apologized. The man said nothing, just waved his hand and walked past Zhang Xiaotian to the side of the track, picking up his shoes. Zhang Xiaotian made way for him and moved aside. He looked up and continued running, only to find that the tuft of hair he had been staring at was gone.
Maybe he ran away too. Zhang Xiaotian changed his target and just as he was about to start his daydreaming, someone suddenly tapped him on the shoulder.
"Hey!" Now it was Zhang Xiaotian's turn to be scared. Some of the students standing in front looked back. Zhang Xiaotian was a little embarrassed. After turning around and seeing who took the photo of him, he couldn't help rolling his eyes.
"What? You don't welcome me? I came to the back row specially to accompany you." Lu Bai grinned, a little dazzling.
"Isn't it because you got caught running away?"
"How could you think of me like that?" Lu Bai deliberately put on a stern face. "I'm one of the top ten model deskmates in the country. I'm a man who has caring for my deskmate etched into his soul. How could I possibly watch my deskmate alone in the cold and lonely wind?"
What about the top ten model deskmates in the country? And, the cold wind? Zhang Xiaotian caught a glimpse of someone in front of him running while taking off his coat and tying it around his waist. There was sweat on his exposed arms, and the sun was shining a little. There were too many things to complain about Lu Bai's words. Zhang Xiaotian didn't know where to start complaining, so he simply didn't say anything. Lu Bai kept chattering on, but Zhang Xiaotian didn't listen much, only occasionally replying him with an "um" or "ah". After a while, there was no movement next to him. Zhang Xiaotian had been a little used to this background noise, and when it suddenly stopped, he asked him, "Why don't you talk?"
"I see you're not interested in what I say." Lu Bai curled his lips.
"Not bad." Zhang Xiaotian was also a little hot from running. He rolled up his sleeves to his forearms and couldn't help but say, "I thought you were afraid that the cold wind would catch your teeth."
"Damn, deskmate!" Lu Bai was amused, his white teeth showing and his eyes dazzled. "You talk quite interestingly!"
"I'm not as good as you." Zhang Xiaotian said.
"Really? Do you really think what I say is interesting?" Lu Bai clicked his tongue. "I wouldn't believe it even if I were a ghost."
"Don't believe it? Then just shut up and squint." Zhang Xiaotian said.
"That won't do. When have you ever seen me, Lu Bai, stop talking?" Lu Bai shook his head seriously and continued, "Shall we run too?"
"Run if you want," Zhang Xiaotian lowered his sleeves again, "I won't run."
"Come on, classmate, let's go to the cafeteria. I want to buy a bag of 'Lucky'."
The small canteen that Lu Bai mentioned is the store on the campus of No. 4 Middle School, and the name of the "Lucky" instant noodles.
"I'm not going."
"Then I'm leaving?" Lu Bai asked him again, "Am I really leaving?"
Zhang Xiaotian waved his hand and told him to leave quickly.
Lu Bai sprinted a few paces around the bend, weaving his way through the blind spot of the woods and leaving the group on the outer circle. Zhang Xiaotian continued running with the group, but after only a few steps, he began to hear something... boring.
A bit boring, yes. The march on the radio continued to blare, the clatter of footsteps and the occasional chatter of conversation made it as lively as any other break. But at this moment, Zhang Xiaotian felt something hidden, a feeling he had usually ignored, reviving, like a bud on a plant that hadn't seen the sun for a long time, struggling to break out upon discovering the sunlight. He ran a few more steps, and just as he was about to turn the corner, he followed another person who was also running away from the exercise and ran down. He reached the side of the road, not knowing where to go, so he headed straight for the classroom.
When he returned to the classroom, there were already two people sitting in the room. They must have been on good terms and were talking. When they saw Zhang Xiaotian walk to the door, they stopped. Zhang Xiaotian found it a little funny and a little unhappy that the two people stopped talking when they saw him. He had always entered and exited from the back door before, but this time he hesitated for only a moment before entering from the front door. He walked from the first row to the last row of the class, and when he passed by the two people, he didn't even look at them. He went straight to his seat and sat down. The two people waited for Zhang Xiaotian to walk over and started talking again, but their voices were lowered. Zhang Xiaotian sat in his seat, listening to the low voices of conversation in the room, and suddenly felt that he was sick.
The director's voice came over the radio, arranging the classes to line up and return to the classroom. Judging by the distance, it would take a while before they entered the teaching building, but then a noisy sound of footsteps could be heard in the hallway, approaching from afar, as if they were running back. Zhang Xiaotian looked towards the door and saw Lu Bai about to run past it.
Lu Bai seemed surprised to see him. He had originally run straight for the back door, but then turned back and entered through the front door. He walked nimbly to the last row, bringing with him a gust of warm air. He threw something onto the table with a "pa" and pulled out a stool to sit down.
"You ran away too? Aren't you going to run away?"
"If you want to run, just run." Zhang Xiaotian looked at the table and saw a bag of instant noodles.
"If I had known you were going to run away, I would have joined you later." Lu Bai stuffed the instant noodles into the table, took out his textbook and placed it on the table. "I just came out of the cafeteria and almost bumped into the director. Luckily I ran fast, otherwise I would have been stared at."
Zhang Xiaotian watched him busying around beside him, and the strong feeling of being excluded suddenly disappeared. He could vaguely smell the starch sausage that Lu Bai had brought back, and he found it quite fragrant, which was unusual.
"Is the canteen selling starch sausage today?" Zhang Xiaotian couldn't help but say.
"What?" Lu Bai didn't hear clearly.
"Nothing." Zhang Xiaotian woke up as if from a dream, and said, "If you run with me, you won't be able to buy instant noodles."
"I can't eat many bites even if I buy it now. I might as well buy some after class." Lu Bai pinched the bag a few times, tore open the package and was about to pour it into his mouth, but suddenly glanced at Zhang Xiaotian and moved the instant noodles closer to him.
"Want to have a mouthful?" Lu Bai asked.
Zhang Xiaotian thought to himself, did he look like he really wanted to eat it? However, the words of refusal came to his lips but he couldn't bring himself to say no. For a moment, neither of them moved.
Lu Bai waited a moment, sighed, and raised his hand, palm up, pointing with his chin. Zhang Xiaotian followed his lead, extending his palm and selecting the fullest noodle from the bag. He placed it in his palm before pouring some into his mouth, chewing a few mouthfuls, and continuing, "I'll buy you some next time. I...didn't think of it this time."
"No, I..." Zhang Xiaotian tried to explain that he didn't want to eat, but before he could finish, he heard footsteps and voices coming and going in the corridor. Lu Bai hurriedly poured more noodles into his mouth, and gestured for Zhang Xiaotian to eat quickly. Zhang Xiaotian looked at the piece of instant noodles in his palm, and suddenly felt it was a little hot. He hurriedly stuffed it into his mouth, chewed it for a long time, but couldn't taste it.
After evening study, the homeroom teacher stopped Zhang Xiaotian and told him his mother was there to pick him up. Zhang Xiaotian felt awkward and didn't even dare look at the teacher's face when he greeted him. He found his mother's car at the school gate as the teacher had said, and as soon as he got in, he said, "You don't have to pick me up from school anymore. I'll go home by myself."
"You can't find it." Xiaotian's mother said, started the car and drove away from the school.
"I can find it." Zhang Xiaotian argued, "I already checked the bus route yesterday."
"No need." His mother rejected him flatly without giving a reason. Zhang Xiaotian didn't want to say anything more. The car windows were closed and the car was so quiet that he could hear the sound of traffic outside.
"You...Xiaotian, what did you have for dinner?" Mom seemed to realize that her tone was wrong and tried to make amends. "Mom will bring you dinner starting tomorrow, okay?"
"No need... to go through so much trouble." Zhang Xiaotian couldn't help but start speaking cautiously, "I'll just take a bite."
"How can that be?" Mom said softly at first, then her voice rose. "The food at home is clean and safe. What if you get sick eating out? You'll have to take time off, which will delay your studies..." She was about to say more, but suddenly realized something and forced herself to lower her voice. She added in a tone that was on the verge of anger but had to be patient:
"Mom is also worried about your health. Your dad definitely didn't take good care of you before."
Zhang Xiaotian paused for a long time, feeling that this life was rather boring. He should have known long ago that his mother was dissatisfied with him in many ways, but she had only granted him custody for reasons he didn't understand. He had no power to refute her decision, nor could he make choices for his own life.
"Xiaotian, do you understand what your mother is saying?" His mother was still urging him to express his opinion.
"Yeah. I understand."
Zhang Xiaotian said.
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